Our Fears About Pregnancy with Mental Illness
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 5 ก.พ. 2025
- We sit down to chat about some of the fears we have around this pregnancy. Lauren has schizoaffective disorder, and so we discuss some of our fears around navigating pregnancy with a mental illness.
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Hey, my parents are both neurotypical, but abusive as hell. The fact that you want to and plan to do the best by your future child, already sets you a huge cut above the rest.
For sure!!!
they are smart people who cope like proś. they have insight in how the world works. being neurotypical doesn mean you have even comon sense. people with lower iqś can be abusive too.
Love this comment… I totally read it wrong at first… i thought you were calling them abusive… smh. I love what you said though!!!! There are so many “normal” people that are abusive as hell. I work at an adult foster home for adults with mental illness and I know my clients could/ or would have made GREAT parents with the right support. I love nice people!
Great idea, highering a night Doula or helper… Did y’all end up doing that?
i love how attentive you are of each other while speaking
I effing love seeing that between couples, so lovely
One thing we can all be sure of is that you're going to have a gorgeous baby.
The way you stare at each other is amazing. If only all couples had such a caring relationship
I have schizophrenia and I am a Dad. I found that even when I'm unwell and in hospital I still always of course have great love and a caring attitute towards my beautiful daughter. If anything I am more understanding of her as she grew up. I'm sure you will be both great parents. Don't worry it will come naturally. Take it easy and enjoy life!
This video hit very close to home for me. I do not have schizophrenia, but I have severe anxiety and clinical depression. Being able to advocate for your needs during pregnancy is key. I had one OB tell me I needed to stop meds while I was pregnant. I tried so hard to be well off my meds and when I couldn't , since I was off of my meds the illness started to tell me I was a failure as a mom and how can I take care of this little human, if I couldn't take care of me. My husband was amazing and encouraged me to seek out another doctor and was with me at as many appointments as he could be and when I told the new doctor my personal history and that I was completely off my meds at the advice of my previous doctor, she was upset and said that it was a much more complicated thing to navigate. She got me back on my meds at the lowest dosage that I felt healthy. If mom is not well, baby is not well. My mental status improved greatly and I had a healthy baby girl. It's scary but so worth it. Good luck. I hope for the absolute best for you and your family.
Completely understand your concerns. Just know that you will be amazing parents, especially in light of the fact that you are considering all your fears beforehand. A bad/irresponsible person/parent would not take the time to prepare as you both are doing. Know that you have lots of people around the world who care about you and are praying for you both. I am soooo happy for you!!!
My husband also has schizoaffective disorder. I cannot express enough gratitude for you, your husband and your channel. I’ve been following your journey and your channel for almost two years now. You have helped me immensely to understand my husband’s mental illness better. You’ve provided me with knowledge and resources to help support him better. I can’t thank you both enough for continuing to share your journey with us.
You two are such role models for parents! Not many people are as thoughtful as you are. I hope I can approach motherhood in the future by being prepared with a good support network and taking lots of initiative like you guys.
Postpartum depression is very common - so just be on the lookout that your could need more support for you in the months after the birth. Good luck to you both! 💕
Personally I think it would be a great loss to the world if you had not survived the illness and continue to survive what is an incredibly disabling condition. I'm sure Rob would share my thoughts. Lauren you are an inspiration to Humanity, you deserve to extract happiness from life. If your child is born without or without symptoms the child will have a very enlightened mother and father.
I'm sure the experience of watching the miracle of life develop will further enlighten you....Life is really about a journey for each of us and sufferers of Mental Health have a lot of Mountains to negotiate which can seem exhausting at times....Sufferers of thought disorder symptoms in particular have several Mount Everest's to climb...
As a sufferer of Bipolar II and numerous ECT treatments over a 35 year period I have have defied significant odds with 30% of male sufferers committing suicide before the age of 30. I have lost a lot of friends that sadly didn't survive the journey to the top. My observation is that Lauren, you, have an incredible incite to your illness and even stronger intuitive desire to survive. A perhaps more importantly, an incredibly kind, compassionate partner in Rob.
One of the most important survival tools that my learned Psychiatrist of 35 years gave me was not my chemical regime....it was his wise words....
1. When symptoms become disabling the sufferer needs to develop the mindset of putting yourself first. Repeating....
Lauren....Lauren ....Lauren is so important ...... we all want you to survive and flourish and reach the view from the top. The view
from the top is breathtaking .....but its a long journey so rest when you need it....
2. Its not your fault....Its not your fault......Its not your fault.....You are a beacon of light for others to follow
3. The illness is the enemy......you are not the enemy save your strength and stay strong when the enemy tries to undermine your.
health
4. In closing ...and this view reflects perhaps more of a spiritual view of life that I have slowly developed during my 35 year battle
History shows us that some of the most inspirational spiritual teachers have had to endure great suffering. As a male my
hero's include Jesus, Dr Marin Luther King, Nelson Mandela, Abraham Lincoln all endured great suffering but their conscious
Life's gave the world hope...I can now add Lauren to the list....
5. Hope to see you at the top with Rob and baby in tow.
even if the child would have the genes for that even exists, it would not develop sz. because of his or hers great parents and environment.
Her getting pregnant proves she has NO insight into her illness. This is why society is declining. Who is paying for all their doctor bills and therapy? You have no idea how naive it is to think the child will not suffer. And its more genetic than environmental. Organic brain disorder vs personality disorder.
Don't you see? She can't be 'lauren, Lauren, Lauren' with a helpless baby to take care of. Most of us suffer something, but why start off with a guarentee?
@@cassandraotroy6325
1. You need to understand that one parent having schizophrenia DOES NOT mean the child will suffer from schizophrenia
2. My understanding is the Lauren lives in the USA and so most of her medical bills have to be paid for by the parents.
3. Watch the film the Enigma Code. It is a true storey of a young Englishman born with a mental illness that envisaged the possibility
of building the worlds first computer. During World War II his idea was put to the test and after about 2 years of struggle under his leadership
his team constructed the Worlds First computer that was used to break the secret Nazi encrypted communication method. He is recognised
for saving the lives of about 12 million people and reducing WWII by two years.
Sadly in 1950 he committed suicide as a bigoted discriminatory English Society saw him given the choice of chemical castration or 2 years in prison
for being a homosexual. He elected chemical castration on subsequent suicide.
Lauren might give birth to the next Human Being that helps reduce the bigoted, ill informed views you and numerous other human beings share.
4. Might I suggest that if you have a child it is far more likely to develop into a problem child based on the environmental conditions the child would
be forced to grow up in your toxic household
@@scottlangrehr144 I've worked with many who though the child didn't have schizophrenia, ALL of the grandchildren did. Ever hear about skipping generations? I have a friend with a schizoaffective mother. 3 of 4 children living on welfare, one is institutionalized. 3 with schizophrenia.
It's just incredible, how courageous you both are. I can see, that it takes a lot, but there's just so much value in your content. I just can't even imagine opening like that. Thanks for your work
You are blessed with intelligence and knowledge of the illness so you will probably stress yourself out overthinking things and looking for signs in your child because that’s what I do as a young mom with schitzophrenia. Luckily for me I stopped medication right before I had my son and my symptoms were gone for 6years but then as my life started to get stressful the voices and overthinking came back and put me in a stressful situation especially since I wasn’t on meds. I was lucky enough to take care my child mental illness free for those five years but now I deal with my schizophrenia daily and my son is 6years old. It’s hard sometimes but it’s not impossible and kids are rewarding in their own way... you just need to remember to make time for yourself and have your energy being put towards you and your children. You are amazing and I have faith in you as a woman and mother and you have Rob by your side to help you get thru anything. You are blessed. Unfortunately I don’t have that kind of help and support which is what makes my issues worse but it’s all about the mindset and you will be amazing ! Don’t let the fear get to you... life is a rollercoaster and you are handling it well. Schizophrenia is hard in itself so I don’t know much about schizoaffective disorder but as smart as you are , you will concur anything. God bless you and understand that depression is real so don’t let yourself worry urself into depression. Take ur meds and just relax! God is giving you your child for a reason!
So true. We can overthink and analyze like there's no tomorrow! I have bipolar disorder and was asymptomatic from full blown mania for nearly a decade! I was not medicated for all of that time and had two pregnancies and postpartum periods as well. My illness reared its ugly head when my youngest was 1 and I actually experienced my first and only hospitalization for 10 days. I have committed to meds and counselling, and regular follow up and I've been symptom free for nearly 2.5 years now.
@@darbirhian wow God Bless you! Yes everyone is different. I myself take meds now because I didn’t take them serious for a while and then when the voices came back I seen myself getting drained and overwhelmed and just wanted to sleep all the time to avoid hearing anything so I understand alittle of how Lauren May feel ... and being smart and educated helps but it also makes us overthink things a lot more and analyze our every movement which is draining to do. I committed myself to taking the meds now although Iknow I can handle the voices but it’s just annoying if you hear them talking from the moment you open your eyes til the moment you fall asleep... it’s so exhausting. I take my meds daily now to avoid falling into any negative symptoms such as sleeping a lot because I do have a 6year old that I take care of by myself. I used to do well with my illness and look at it as a gift so that’s helped me a lot in many ways but it is stressful and I have to take it more serious now because I’m getting older and realize it takes a huge toll on my life and socialization with others! You are strong for dealing with your illness for that long without meds.... I had dealt with mine for three years before without any meds so I understand how tough mentally u have to be to do that. Stay safe and take care! We are great mothers and are here on this earth for many beautiful reasons... mental illness can’t stop us from being amazing parents. It helps us understand our children a lot better and we will be able to help them if they ever deal with anything that we deal with
@@darbirhian but sczophernia is totally different....
@@jessex5 I read your both comnents and became happy,and your comment gave me lots of satisfection and hope..you're the first person,who's comnents are really comfortable incase of sczophernia,I'm broken from last 4 months,Because incase of my 16 years old,she became ill first time,she has a severe phsycotic breakdown in the end of May then we contacted to the doctor with our family doctor on 12th of june and our family doctor straight way transfer us towards phsyciatrists and our phsyciatrists saw her,prescribe her Aripiprazole until 15th of July,But Aripiprazole wasn't working and she stop sleeping day and night even she wasn't sleeping until 28,30,40,50,70,90 hours,then in emergency,we contact with the doctor then as a emergency,doctor prescribe her diazpam ,But then she got hospitalized straight way,they prescribe her olanzapine,and doctor stop the diazpam and said only olanzapine is enough..she is quite well and normal,doing good...but I became very happy after reading your comments that all people sufferrd from scozophernia be different and they can live well lots of years without medication....your comment real gave me new life...thanks....
@@aaymathebest4705 Hey !! Yes everyone is different and I too was on Aripripozole for a while when I was about 19-20. Although it didn’t help me completely get rid of the overthinking and voices it helped me drown them out and I was able to focus on myself more and the things around me. I took it for about a year then something told me to stop if I ever want to have a child so I stopped and I was good for about 5- 6years without any meds and didn’t have any schitzophrenia symptoms but I guess as you get older and life stressors come about it can come back so after I had my son , about when he was 4 turning 5 my symptoms came back and I was off medication for almost 2years before I had issues because of the lack of sleep. I was working 12hour shift in a warehouse then coming home taking care my son and household so all of that took a tole on me along with hearing the voices all day and night and that was very exhausting and overwhelming and it just got to the point where I couldn’t sleep for days so I ended up admitting myself into the hospital for treatment. So yes everyone is different and some may be blessed enough that the symptoms go away for a while and maybe even years such as mine but that’s okay because all you need is the right medication and you can get back to yourself and living a great as “Normal” as can be life. Don’t ever doubt people’s ability to heal from things... everyone is different and has different stressors that could bring about symptoms they just need to take care of themselves, eat well and make sure they sleep a good amount so they can be energized and focused for the day.
Feel free to subscribe to my TH-cam channel or show your daughter that someone with mental health issues can live a great and happy life. Although not everyday is going to be exciting and happy but you have to take life one day at a time and it’s all about the way you view your illness as well. (FYI Makeup and Music is a great way to pick yourself up when your having a bad day) GOD Bless you and your daughter. - its hard living with a diagnoses but she is still growing and learning herself and stressors as a individual so tell her to just be patient and mindful of those stressors and she too can get rid of it if she just keeps herself alil busy and occupied so she doesn’t stress over the illness itself. Alil medication won’t hurt ; I look at it as “brain food” lol Vitamins for the brain... our brain is overworking itself so it deserves some extra care.
Thank you for your vulnerability and transparency in sharing your fears. I have enormous respect for the thought you and Rob have given this decision and I have so much confidence you’ll continue to manage any issues as they arise. Wishing you all the best.
This is invaluable information, please keep doing what you are doing as hopefully one day I’ll be going through this too! Thank you for being so honest as well, really makes me feel hopeful for the future.
Hi guys. Scitzophrenia and postpartum psychosis survivor here. You guys will be fine. You will get treatment early if you do get postpartum psychosis which will get you stabilized fast. All the best!
You are so brave for sharing. Thank you.
You two are obviously very on top of this, and have thought so much of this process through. Parenting is never easy but you sound like you’re doing as much as you can and that’s going to make you both great parents.
I have a different mental illness, but after our first baby I was put on mood stabilizers and antipsychotics. I'm so scared of the idea of possible complications when being on meds while pregnant that we decided not to have another. It's been a big heartbreak for me. I'm so happy for you guys and you're so brave to push through the fears. I know you'll be a great mommy.
Thank you for being so open and honest about your struggles and fears. You can see the love you both share for each other. I hope the baby sleeps through the night and that you both can keep up with your physical and mental health! I look forward to seeing baby! Keep doing what you’re doing you are helping so many people!
Just stumbled across this video. I have a brother with schizophrenia that is not living doing so well lately with the holidays coming up. I just thought I’d let you know that it’s nice to see someone with schizophrenia living well and it gives me hope that my brother may one day be at that point! I’m always hoping with acceptance of his diagnosis and time he will someday be able to manage his schizophrenia❤️
From an experienced mother of five, you sound just like any mother! Its a God-given miracle how love takes over
when you have a new baby! Your kids will just blossom from this experience.
A viewpoint that I adopted when I became a Mom is that its our job to help our child
feel adored because life is kind of tough sometimes. But that so comes naturally, you'll see. And you'll certainly be in
my prayers, you're going to do a wonderful job, for sure for sure!!!
So interesting about mothering being a protective factor for schizophrenia. I have a generalized anxiety disorder and struggled massively with my mental health during pregnancy, however now that my son is here (he's now 2 years old) I find my mental health is better than ever. Sleeping enough is the key (though so hard!!!).
Best of luck with your pregnancy and birthing, Lauren and Rob!
I have type 1 bipolar with psychotic features, but I think it's progressed to schizoaffective over the past 5 years or so (I was diagnosed 21 years ago as a youth). My one and only child is happy, healthy, and fully informed about my mental illness and what it can mean for her. Her paternal grandmother and aunts all have type 1 bipolar, so there's a high chance she will develop bipolar later on. I'm teaching her now all the strategies I use to stay functional, and how important taking medicine and going to appointments are.
thank you for opening up about this and bringing awareness to mental illness. it's such an important topic!
Thank you so much for making these videos! As a person that doesn’t have the illness (I only have generalized anxiety disorder) I think it’s sooo important to learn about what someone else might be going through, and how to help them :)
Support them*, sorry, English isn’t my first language
Don't worry, little Baby, your parents will be just fine.
We don’t know until we are actually doing it. Mentally it’s so scary but focus on your self care. It sounds like you’re figuring it out, i have faith that you are going to very well Lauren. Surround yourself with calming things and remember it’s ok to have a rough time we can’t control everything. ❤️
I don’t want this to sound shallow or anything but you are both really beautiful people and also look soo different in your features, it’s gonna be so cool to see how beautiful your baby will look with both of your features :)
I have bipolar 1 and I had postpartum psychosis 4 months after the birth of my firstborn. It was a frightening thing, especially for my husband and his family. But with hospitalization and drug treatment I fully recovered, and I never got psychosis again. Hope this helps. Looking good Lauren.
Btw, my youngest son's name is Oliver.☺️
So sorry to hear that, that is one of my biggest fears, having postpartum depression or psychosis if I have a kid
@@AA-lq5bj It's something to consider.
You may want to consider contacting the local college to have a nursing student help you with taking care of baby at night. Just the fact you are thinking through all this tells me you’ll be great parents!!
Worth considering that formula can be prepped ahead of time and placed in fridge for up to 24 hours. RTF can be stored up to 48 hours. This can be used strategically to increases moms options for sleeping by enabling dad and other caregivers to help feed baby. In the long run this can really benefit moms with conditions that require more sleep to stay well. Also bottle feeding allows you to know exactly how much baby is eating. Baby not eating enough is a huge source of anxiety for many parents. Plus skin to skin can still be used with bottle feeding by holding baby against chest while feeding. It might not be ideal but there are upsides to bottle feeding.
This was a paragon of open communication and understanding between a couple about to become parents. Y'all are going to do wonderfully! It is a balancing act and a HUGE learning curve, but as long as you keep communicating with each other and your doctors, you will be just fine 🙂
I have schizophrenia I don't have kids and I have the same fears. I love you video
Hi Lauren I know this is an older video but I’m diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder recently (since august 2022) and before the diagnosis I had a baby (2015)I was unaware of my illness fully. I knew something was off and knew that for a while.
But personally I found myself blissful mostly, during my whole pregnancy and the protective factor was huge it made me try everything possible to deliver my baby safely that’s all my mind was geared around. I never went through postpartum depression myself I was and am a single mother and was doing it on my own. (I had a good helpful family but declined help, now knowing I declined because of the illness) but long story short I don’t know where I was going with any of that lol. I love your videos they’re a great help. I send good thoughts and strong 💪 vibes for the rest of your journey with parenthood
You are such wonderful and thoughtful couple. Your baby is going to have an awesome life full of love.
Gurl I can honestly say that you truly are a survivor and fighter. I admire you tremendously.
You will have an amazing baby, will have a lot of joy and happiness, you will get a lot of help, you will DO GREAT!
weather they get schizophrenia or not, they will be affected by it. I hope all goes well , and get all the support you need. God bless.
Congratulations!!! You will make wonderful parents whether or not you have a child that develops the disorder, or any mental condition for that matter. You are both well equipped as you said and make a great team. Wishing you to be well, and to have a great pregnancy! Exciting ❤️
omg i loved the part where you’re talking about your kids saying hi to baby🥺 you sound incredibly capable, and im so excited for your family♥️
i think that what i wanted to say has already been said, and potential risks or not, you guys are just the people who would raise the best and happiest little humans
I love this channel and how educational it is. I am optimistic about this pregnancy and you both are in my thoughts! You are wonderful xo
My birth mother sent me to adoption after 3 months of having me. She had schizophrenia and so I've lived my life paranoid about it. I never got it. My mom dropped the mental health issue well after I had been doing drugs which could trigger it. I wish she had done some soft teaching prior to teenage years.
Anyways. If I had had schizophrenia I would have wanted my mother of all people who HAD it too, to be my mom.
Congratulations you guys! I watch your channel all the time because I also suffer from a mental illness for years and one of my best friends at work suffers from schizophrenia and you have helped me understand what is happening with her sometimes and how to be supportive of her without being intrusive or making her feel out of place. You will be wonderful parents! Also that haircut is amazing on you, but you are just beautiful and glowing in pregnancy! I wish you both the best!❤
I think that the night nurse is a fantastic idea!! I would highly recommend it!
The single time I was well without meds during the past 20 years was during pregnancy. I feel blessed for my child about this, and for her to be a strong human being.
I don’t recommend to stop meds at all; just got an insight that pregnancy really carried us through that med-less time.
Hi Lauren and Rob, I've seen your videos about two weeks ago. I couldn't stop listening to you. I have to say that I quickly impressed by you. You are so strong and deserve everything well in your life. I even thought that I wish I was there to help you for taking care of your beautiful baby when you feel tired. I hope I didn't express my words in a wrong way.
Wish you all the best!!:)
If you end up needing to bottle feed your baby with formula he or she will be just fine! I wasn't able to breastfeed either of my gorgeous daughters who are now 18 and 23 years old. I just didn't produce enough milk, so on the advice of our pediatrician we chose to go with formula only, and they not only survived but thrived. They are both happy, smart, beautiful and healthy and always have been, even as babies. Don't let that concern weigh on you too much - the baby will be just fine and your mental and physical health and stamina is extra important when caring for a little one.
I'm adopted as are my 3 siblings and we weren't breastfed and we all turned out healthy with none of us having asthma or any other illnesses.
I wish you two the best but I couldn’t take the chance you are taking. I couldn’t gamble with a child’s well being.
I have schizoaffective disorder but my husband doesn’t, 2 of my 3 kids have it. But good news Lauren...if your baby gets it... since you are so aware of the symptoms you can teach your child young what to expect/how to cope. Me and my oldest son have good communication when it comes to the symptoms, so he is managing way better than I did at his age. But it’s mostly because of keeping him on supplements and his oils. Managing how much processed foods and sugars lower his symptoms greatly.
I also had the postpartum depression for years after my babies. I needed so much help and my mom had to care for my youngest for the first year of his life. And my sister had to care for my second child cause I could hardly handle caring for my oldest.
It will be hard, but you keep trying and that’s all you can do. You keep going forward.
Obviously schizophrenia etc. are not conditions to be desired, but how wonderful to have schizophrenia etc. and to also have such wonderful parents who are uniquely equipped to handle that. Either way, the baby is in good hands.
I wouldn't worry too much, it seems like you have a very supportive partner in Rob and I think that makes a world of difference
Your fears are legitimate. I went thru two pregnancies unmedicated (was undiagnosed), and developed postpartum depression that lasted for months. If I had been more aware, as you are, I’m pretty sure my experience would have been different.
Fantastic video! They should teach the importance of mental health in schools. Keep up the great work!
You are gorgeous Lauren! ❤️❤️❤️ You are blessed to have Rob by your side. You deserve love!
Awww your stepkids call you mom? That's so sweet and special. I'm a Stepmom and I will never be able to get the title of mom and it saddens me.
You will be a great mom, but there may be some bumps along the way and that's alright. It doesn't define your value and worthiness as a parent. Post-partum depression and anxiety was a huge concern for my husband and I. We were fortunate in that I didn't really have a big problem with it. Also, formula with my second was a massive help in getting enough sleep, so I recommend it in your situation. Breastfeeding was something I really wanted to do, but I tortured myself with my first (3 bouts of mastitis and a benign tumor finally put an end to that) and so, it wasn't even a possibility with my second. But that turned out to be a blessing.
Wait to see how happy their kid is at 15. Good intentions save no one. I hope im wrong. Ive never seen these bad choices go well. Canada will raise these kids.
@@cassandraotroy6325 Well, you are a nice person! You watch this channel *all the time!*
I had my babies before I was diagnosed and during pregnancy my symptoms actually lessened. I was fortunate enough to breastfeed without much trouble as well and I swear I could feel the oxytocin rush through my brain making me feel better. Of course that is no substitute for real medication and it's different for everyone, if I had known I might have done things differently. My husband was diagnosed bipolar after we had our kids too, so there is a good chance that one or more of my kids will have a mental illness. My solution is communication and making sure my kids know that they can talk to me about anything.
Blessings to your family. Kids are resilient.Your older kids will thrive. You are much more centered and prepared for a baby than I was when I had my first. You will love your baby whatever the outcome. I think that you will be excellent parents. Challenges are part of life. Your children will learn and grow so much from your example.
Thanks so much for this video. I’m currently pregnant and have bipolar 1. I’ve had to stay on medication as well and I have really similar fears. I appreciate you talking about this and although we have different disorders I relate to you so much!
I will keep you in my Prayers 🙏🏻🤰🏼👶🏻 and Rob
I was a night sitter once a week for a wonderful family who had sleep needs. I don't know why exactly but that doesn't matter. I loved that time and grew so close to that baby. I love kids and it was such a sweet time to give the baby some love and care while her parents rest. I think it's a wonderful idea!
Oh and I did it during college so I would maybe look into health students in the area. It was great because I could nap or study plus I got some much needed money.
Lauren. Purchase the best running stroller that you can.
It's just a stroller that is set up for running so it is set up on three wheels. A lot of Mom runners use them. It is also a place to bind with baby and have fun in t+3 world.
Best wishes! I think it’s worth it and a tremendous blessing.
You guys are amazing and I feel like if you made a plan with charts of who's gonna do what, time tables, schedules and to do lists for family members, etc.. it would ease the burden on you guys. Just the proactive nature of coming up with a plan, making calendars, etc.. takes pressure off of the worries and distracts from the anxiety and empowers everyone to take part. I love the idea of shifting roles and Leaning on your support system. You guys are gonna be great parents together.🥰👍
Thank you! You are helping so many people!
I don’t know the ages of your other children but here in my town our local hospital holds “baby sitting” classes and it’s to teach siblings and others how to be helpful. Maybe look to see for something like that? Love you both and wishing nothing but the best for you all. 💕
what medications were you on during your pregnancy? or did you take out the meds that were prescribed to you during pregnancy?
Just being aware of those fears makes them less likely to come true- or enables you to tackle them a lot better if they do. And being aware that everything is for the better of the family unit helps get through the tougher times.
I think it's good that you guys are thinking of the possible outcomes and strategizing so you're coping ahead of time. That said I have three children and they all we're really good with sleeping long periods during the night. there's always going to be times where things will differ… Grow spurs… Teething… Illness… Change in milestones. I feel like the best thing I did as a parent was not associating sleep time with quiet time. I wore all three of my kids in wraps and I would do the dishes and vacuum while they slept chest to chest (naps) , in the baby sling. White noise at night time. because of this most noises wouldn't startle my kids after they fell asleep. So when I was putting them down at night time they wouldn't be awoken easily at night if there noise from doors closing, foot steps, loud but distant noises. If they did wake they fell back asleep very easily. My kids are 11.5, 9.5, and 5 now. all them had slightly different Circumstances during infancy. My oldest was born at a hospital and her birth was slightly Trumatic. She was breast-fed and formula fed due inadequate milk supply. I was a full-time working mom the first six months of her life. My second child was the most positive birth and a homebirth. She was 100% breast-fed until she self weaned just before two years, I was a stay at home mom. She slept in my bed for three years. My third child was born early but he was sick so the first two weeks of life he was in the hospital, half the time he was on a ventilator. I couldn't even hold him until he was about five days old and it was terrifying. I tried my best to breast-feed but ended up having to do formula exclusively. Sometimes he would nap in the bed with me but he almost always was in the bassinet next to the bed during the night. So you can see three completely different types of experiences during infancy but they all napped and slept at night really well. I personally feel like baby wearing and making sure there was white noise or background noise while sleeping/napping helped so much. Also baby wearing helped me multi task so I had more me time. Fussy baby, put in sling and vacuum. Combo really soothed my kids often. Anyways best wishes.
I said this on other videos, but I cannot emphasize enough how helpful a professional doula can be for both birth and the postpartum period.
I just heard the part about a night doula! Yes, do it!!!! 🙂
Schizoaffective mom of 4 here. But I'm a bit weird. The hormone cocktail actually helps stabilize me. Breastfeeding helps to extend the the effect, but it starts to quickly drop off after baby turns one year old and the amount of nursing tends to drop quickly. 18 months old is about the longest I can push it. I was diagnosed Bipolar I 10 months before I got pregnant with my first at 19. My instincts told me to stop the meds immediately. My doctors weren't happy. Turns out one of the meds I was on was linked to heart defects just a few short years later. I wasn't on meds when I conceived 2 and 3, though I should have been before 3. I wasn't diagnosed with Schizoaffective until age 30, when my third was 17 months old. When I got pregnant with baby #4, I found out about a week before my monthly visit with my psychiatrist, and literally the exchange at that appointment was as follows:
Him: how have you been doing?
Me: Found out Christmas Eve that I'm pregnant!
Him: well, I guess that means we need to stop those meds now!
He ran through the usual screening questions to cover the bases, and that was it. I was SOOOO thankful that I didn't have to fight with him about going off of the meds, that he had both my own AND my baby's health in mind. I was on 3mg of Rexulti, and this was just before New Year 2019, so it had only been on the market for a few short years and they had ZERO clue about what kind of effect it could have on a fetus. They just had (probably still do) a registry to monitor the effects and outcomes of pregnancies exposed to it. I noped right out of that as soon as I got that second line on that stick, but I was SO worried that I would get in trouble for stopping them without doctors orders (I have to test each month to prove compliance), and that it would be a fight to get the doctor to take me off of them. Baby #4 is now 14 months old and I will likely not make it to her second birthday with breastfeeding since I'm likely going to have to return to the meds in the next few months. My two from my previous marriage no longer live with me due to my mental state having deteriorated so much in my mid twenties, but I still have my third and fourth. Dad is absolutely my soul mate and he helps immensely with maintaing my mental state in a good place, keeps me grounded, and helps out by picking up my slack when I'm not doing so great. I literally could NOT do this alone, without him. Motherhood is all I ever wanted, and my kids, even with all the stress they bring, are therapeutic in a way for me because being their mom was my life's dream. Eugenics failed. Even us certified crazy mommas have the right to the pursuit of happiness... And to have a family.
Correction: mom of 5 if this sticks! Found out 2 days ago that we're expecting again!
I don’t think I would worry so much about your child having schizoaffective disorder but rather you going off any medications because of the potential harm to the baby. I would worry about the struggle to cope and where it could put you in the long run. I really enjoy watching you talk about this disorder. My step brother has it and it’s so interesting to see you talk about it in such an educated way. My step brother actually is almost always in a state of psychosis because of using recreational drugs with his medication. It’s really sad.
The medications harm the baby, their brain is being dampened and altered at a crucial stage.
Hi are you taking anti psychotic drugs during 1st trimester?
My late husband Bryan and I lived with Bipolar Disorder. He had children from his first marriage but we decided on a vasectomy after we got married.
Did he pass on the bipolar disorder to the child? I’m just curious. Because it seems like a high chance
You are both amazing. You inspire people 😍
Thanks for this video! My mom had schizophrenia and committed su****de when I was 19, I'm 32 now and I still wonder if I will have it someday.
U are beautiful,Inshallah you will get better...
Hello Lauren and Rob,
I would like to know more about what you call your support network family also I guess future grandparents for example.
All the best,
Peter Nolan. Ph.D.(physics). Dublin. Ireland.
I am not a doctor, but I wonder if you can breast feed for the first 3 days? And then go back on the mood stabilizer? I heard the colostrum produced in the breast milk during the first 3 days of breastfeeding is so important for a newborn? And then after you can bottle feed? Just a thought! Love to you both, to the baby and to your whole family!! You can do this!! Praying for you! I think all will be great!! 🙏
I really don't think it matters, my son who was breastfed was constantly Ill & my daughter who wasn't has literally never been ill, she doesn't get sick, ever. So I mean, how important is breastfeeding? Probably not that important if you can get the right nutrition through formula.
I suffer schizoeffective disorder anxoety panic attacks mdd insomnia ptsd my kids suffer deppression anxiety adhd i had add as a child
Thank you for that! I'd love to see more about your partner
Best regards for you and for your baby
My mother had schizophrenia and I did not develop the desease.
I love your channel and I like how you expose the topics.
I wish you the best in this new stage in your life.💗🌺🤰⛄
Did your mum take medications during her pregnancy?
@@aaymathebest4705 I don't know 🤔 I never asked.
quick q: are you stepmother/adoptive mother/THE mother figure to his children from a previous relationship?
My mum was hospitalised 6 weeks before I was born because she was struggling with her depression, ocd anxiety and not being on her normal medication unfortunately it was passed on to me but I don’t not blame my mum for it because it’s not her fault to begin with it was just unfortunate that part of my Mum’s family was passed on to me unfortunately mental illness issues is genetic thing on my mum’s side I have ocd and so does my mum and so doe a few cousins of i have on her side and we also all have depression and other anxiety issues. My mum struggled so much when she was having me she chose to only have the one child so that’s why I’m an only child but we have a special relationship and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Thank you for your videos
I live in Iowa
Can you stay on your medication during pregnancy? My sister is pregnant and she’s not sure. She takes ability
Ya;ll are going to be fine and the kids will be a tremendous help to you. I did want to ask if you were taking choline as a supplement because it has been shown to reduce risk in baby developing illness.
You are going to be a fabulous mom
I slept one or two hours in a row for the first year of my children's life and then maximum three hours in a row until they were three. It can and it does put pressure and strain on your mental health. Luckily I had help but still not being able to sleep was unbearable. You should definitely ask for help and hope your kid is a good sleeper 😘
So excited for you guys. X
Don’t worry about giving your baby formula! I was given formula from the start and I turned out great 😎
I know 2 people who after they had their first baby were triggered into having psychosis when they had had perfectly normal lives before with no signs of any mental illness. Both babies had to be raised by their fathers. One mother never saw her child again and she eventually passed away from old age. The other may have seen the child here and there but the fathers both had to step up, remove the children and raise them on their own. Away from their mothers, they grew up to be successful people without mental illness. Neither child ever had children of their own out of fear of what could happen.
Your guys are going to be ok,
How are Y’all doing? It’s been a year, and I miss your authenticity ❤️🙏❤️
Serious question I have been for a while now wondering if to post here... I love this channel. I learn so much watching those videos. I like the community. Please do not read what I am posting as an attack. I genuinely want to understand.
I am struggling with coming to grips with a decision to have a baby of your own. I still can't really figure out the reason that does not come down to something that is simply selfish. The issues I have are twofold: one is with potentially hereditary problems but also what happens to others around you during the pregnancy and after when you are ill. We now know that child's brain 'soaks up' a lot of mother's emotional trauma's before the birth and that this effects brain's development. And then to subject, knowingly, a human to further traumas stemming from your situation? I just do not understand why? `
And yes, I know, this is not my business. Not my body. Not my life. I am asking because maybe I am missing something in my potentially narrow minded attitude.
There is a theory on the illness which you can research for yourself. With all your great honest video's i wouldnt be surprised if you did so. if you want to know about, one fact is that you have had cats for all your life and probably others and now also. Much respect and thankful for your informational videos which were usefull for my research
If you’re interested (no pressure and not trying to be pushy!!) there are milk banks where other mothers who are able to breast feed can donate their extra breast milk- for moms like you or any mom who isn’t able to breast feed for any reason. Something to look into if you’re interested! ❤️congratulations on the pregnancy! You will be incredible parents.