Thank you for watching and sharing this space with me. I'd love to know what came up for you? If you’'re ready to start or deepen your healing journey, I'd be honored to journey with you. Learn more about how we might do that with this link (self-paced courses & meditations, online group healing, 1:1) courageousjourneys.com/courses If you're on social, let's connect Facebook facebook.com/courageousjourneys TikTok www.tiktok.com/@courageousjourneys
This topic makes me think of the phrase fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me and the minimization of the ongoing assaults because of the shame and misplaced fault we carry.
Hi Peggy! The shame and pain of having lived through sexual abuse is something I still work with, it has been years of therapy and searching for adequate accompaniment, it is hard but I think I am doing well. One of the things I started my healing process with was watching your videos and taking note of much of what you say, it was a big step for me to understand that I had gone through various types of sexual abuse and even more difficult to understand that none of it was my fault. In general there is little useful information on the subject because it is not easy to deal with but above all the fact that there are specialists who believe that a survivor sticks to a kind of list of "this yes, this no, then it is not abuse" complicates a lot the way to let go of the shame that is destroying us little by little. Thank you very much for spreading this information and for giving of your time so that we can feel better about this. We are not alone. Greetings from Mexico!
Thank you so much for watching and sharing your experience. ❤️ I'm so glad the videos have been helpful on your journey and that you're doing well through it.
Me too! And certainly something I unconsciously internalised as about me. And evidence that I had something to feel ashamed of. That the abuse was about me. I know that i speak of multiple abusers to my clients as I see a considerable number of clients who had more than one perpetrator of abuse. Knowing that they aren't alone when they share with me can help with healing shame. Thanks for the video❤
I've had family and strangers abuse me from 10 through 16 and a recent assault. Grew up not being listened to or ignored. The shame of having so many people hurt me continues to wreak havoc on my life. Being conditioned to not talk and the shame for not being able to in adulthood is crushing. I wish I could just suffocate it all and move on. What you pay attention to grows, right?
The shame has never been yours. I'm sorry no one listened to you. You deserved so much better. ❤️ " _What you pay attention to grows, right?_ " ...Depending on what you're paying attention to, you could also say "what you pay attention to heals". Thank you for watching and sharing.
This video is very similar to what took place to me,and bringing back opening up memories of the many times it all happened,and afterwards not being able to forget any of it leaving scars of memories,I’am sorry for venting with placing many comments but it helps with releasing a little bit
To talk about it helps me but always having It difficult to initiate a conversation with therapist or Professional needed to having her initiate in some ways or with administering medications to help with making receiving the treatments more acceptable because of shyness,and social anxieties,but afterwards somehow i feel like it leaves me with addictive behaviors,and anxieties from triggers,and ocd’s worsen only to feel only some of the shame goes away making it easier when showing up for next treatment day🥵😐😘❤️
Thank you for bringing such a great wondrous video on with your beautiful personality,and your coming forward about sharing your knowledge about shame and what it’s all about,thank you again 😇😘❤️🙏Namaste
I still can be left feeling all the shame from all of it that happened many times,and especially the most recent which took place many women left feeling great amounts of shaming never being able to overcome getting flashbacks,nightmares,thoughts,lots bringing me more into it leading to addictive behaviors never would imagine would happen thanks for bringing pertinent information about this subject ☺️
i know but just knowing people that were brought into it staying low keyed about what was happening,and didn’t say anything at the moment or try to stop it from happening,and just even listen,or watch at times when least expecting at wrong places at wrong times being set up,and then there’s more humility,and shame to deal with being was hard to release only more to carry on sorry for venting🥵😐😘
This applies to me, except is about physical violence. I really didn’t know up till this year that I made myself accountable for the suffering, the rejection I felt from all the violence, poverty and lack of emotional, physical support. Even today I wrote down the reason why anger came for a visit. It is anger at God. I was really, really angry for what happened to me, for not being there, I still have this part of me that feels betrayed by everyone. And there are these beliefs that they run on: I am not good enough/ Nobody loves me/ Nobody wants me/ I’m unworthy. Based on the interactions of me as a child, was “If I was worthy, how could I go through this. I must be unlovable, not enough if so much violence and poverty happened. It must mean I am being punished for not being better.” On top of that, my nervous system was in a constant fight/flight/freeze/ and fawn responses leaving me unable to perform at school, unable to focus, unable to do anything of what I was expected to do. That brought more shaming. “Why can’t you just be more careful? Why can’t you just remember when I ask you something? Can’t you see you will never be anything if you don’t perform in school?” And I ended up really blaming me for being broken. My brain was different. I will never be able to make my mother proud. I gave up. I decided I will never be able. Still struggling with it. So much shame! Including starting this healing journey, was based on “I found a way to fix myself” and literally feeding the belief that I am broken.
Thank you for sharing your experience. All of what you shared is so incredibly common for all of us who've experienced childhood trauma. Please know you are not alone. ❤️ I, personally, struggled with these beliefs. You are not broken and there is nothing for you to feel ashamed of in what happened to you or in the ways you struggle. #notourshame #togetherweheal
I could really relate to this all but so much of it happened to me being kept in secret among the people that caused it to happen at the time with being set up happening when least expecting sometimes wrong place at wrong time being put into situations cause me to later being more secretive about a lot of it all in different ways with no knowing and now harder to get healings 😐sorry about this not our fault and never was and now for me never being able to heal from it entirely only to always deal with triggers,and can sometimes be flashbacks,and possibly nightmares if get proper rem sleep 💤 but eventually I know will be gone forever as I believe will happen in matter of time as I keep the Faith Hope And Never Give Up Always 🙏 Lovin’it 😐
I just wanted to say I don’t think you ever get over any of the shame because of having to endure all the humility when a lot happened,and there are always places,and triggers,and thoughts in the mind never to forget about all that happened with no escaping it being stuck in,running out of words to say,and just accepting of it all,sorry for venting here😑🥵🤡
There is no such thing as *sex* trafficking or being trafficked *for sex.* When someone uses you sexually without your consent, it is *sex.* It is *rape.*
Jesus Christ has taken my shame and washed me clean inside and out! He came to bind up the broken hearted and made me whole gradually and tenderly over a decade or more. A bruised reed He will not break and He knows better than any counsellor which stage of your pain and shame needs healing first. 🇬🇧
I find from all of the many traumas there’s always i call them shameful memories,triggers,flashbacks,nightmares,when least expecting seeing it all over again,and i find this is real intense when if i’am a sleep in the middle of sleep,or it shows up if should happen to be near location place where traumas happened or even persons,and even from if drink certain herbal teàs,and then awakening from like bad dreams with memories of it all that happened which now I naturally suffer from insomnia thanks for bringing such meaningful videos being helpful understanding not being the only one having this as to say not alone in this😇🧩🦋😊😘🙏Namaste
I have to say I’ve learned from it all about shame doesn’t go away for me,and is always within,and stays with me,and can often at times relate back to each one of many shameful times when something brings them on as something causing them to be reoccurring in memories ☺️🦋🧩
There is a lot of healing... and self-compassion necessary to be able to release shame but, it is possible. You deserve to be free from the shame you've carried. Thank you for commenting.
Thank you for bringing this reply on about being deserving of help with what is needed to endure to help with all the shame that is held within to get relief,and release from by practicing which is needed,and very deseving🙏🧩🦋🌈❤️😘 Namaste
I could relate to all your talking about,and the comments,and etc.as it all happened,and continues on,and I find myself just having to accept it all for what happened with a grain of salt I say only way as nothing can be done about it only to accept it all when faced with it,and i find this is where the 🥵humility,and shame is kept inside i’ve learned where ever i go left with no choices 🙏🧩🦋
Thank you for this video coming out with an topic about shame which is seldom brought up or talk about because of being so sensitive,and it would he nice if you can bring more videos on about this subject so many can recognize this in them self’s,and get help with all of it which they may be carrying,and need to release 😇🧩🦋🌈❤️😘🙏 Namaste
Thank you for watching and sharing this space with me. I'd love to know what came up for you?
If you’'re ready to start or deepen your healing journey, I'd be honored to journey with you. Learn more about how we might do that with this link (self-paced courses & meditations, online group healing, 1:1) courageousjourneys.com/courses
If you're on social, let's connect
Facebook facebook.com/courageousjourneys
TikTok www.tiktok.com/@courageousjourneys
So glad to see you, Peggy. Shame is big in our society. First personal, then familial, last society. This message is for me. Thank you ❤
So good to see you! 😊 I'm glad the message connected with you. Thank you for watching and sharing. ❤
This topic makes me think of the phrase fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me and the minimization of the ongoing assaults because of the shame and misplaced fault we carry.
The depth of shame can feel like a bottomless well at times. But, none of it has ever been ours. Thank you for watching and commenting. ❤️
Thank you so much. Really needed this.
Hi Peggy!
The shame and pain of having lived through sexual abuse is something I still work with, it has been years of therapy and searching for adequate accompaniment, it is hard but I think I am doing well. One of the things I started my healing process with was watching your videos and taking note of much of what you say, it was a big step for me to understand that I had gone through various types of sexual abuse and even more difficult to understand that none of it was my fault. In general there is little useful information on the subject because it is not easy to deal with but above all the fact that there are specialists who believe that a survivor sticks to a kind of list of "this yes, this no, then it is not abuse" complicates a lot the way to let go of the shame that is destroying us little by little. Thank you very much for spreading this information and for giving of your time so that we can feel better about this. We are not alone. Greetings from Mexico!
Thank you so much for watching and sharing your experience. ❤️ I'm so glad the videos have been helpful on your journey and that you're doing well through it.
Me too! And certainly something I unconsciously internalised as about me. And evidence that I had something to feel ashamed of. That the abuse was about me. I know that i speak of multiple abusers to my clients as I see a considerable number of clients who had more than one perpetrator of abuse. Knowing that they aren't alone when they share with me can help with healing shame.
Thanks for the video❤
Thanks so much for sharing your experience. ❤️ #NotOurShame
I've had family and strangers abuse me from 10 through 16 and a recent assault. Grew up not being listened to or ignored. The shame of having so many people hurt me continues to wreak havoc on my life. Being conditioned to not talk and the shame for not being able to in adulthood is crushing. I wish I could just suffocate it all and move on. What you pay attention to grows, right?
The shame has never been yours. I'm sorry no one listened to you. You deserved so much better. ❤️ " _What you pay attention to grows, right?_ " ...Depending on what you're paying attention to, you could also say "what you pay attention to heals". Thank you for watching and sharing.
This video is very similar to what took place to me,and bringing back opening up memories of the many times it all happened,and afterwards not being able to forget any of it leaving scars of memories,I’am sorry for venting with placing many comments but it helps with releasing a little bit
I'm glad you're able to release a bit of what you've been holding on to. ❤️
To talk about it helps me but always having It difficult to initiate a conversation with therapist or Professional needed to having her initiate in some ways or with administering medications to help with making receiving the treatments more acceptable because of shyness,and social anxieties,but afterwards somehow i feel like it leaves me with addictive behaviors,and anxieties from triggers,and ocd’s worsen only to feel only some of the shame goes away making it easier when showing up for next treatment day🥵😐😘❤️
Thank you for bringing such a great wondrous video on with your beautiful personality,and your coming forward about sharing your knowledge about shame and what it’s all about,thank you again 😇😘❤️🙏Namaste
Thank you for your very kind words. ❤️
I still can be left feeling all the shame from all of it that happened many times,and especially the most recent which took place many women left feeling great amounts of shaming never being able to overcome getting flashbacks,nightmares,thoughts,lots bringing me more into it leading to addictive behaviors never would imagine would happen thanks for bringing pertinent information about this subject ☺️
It is never your shame to carry. ❤️
i know but just knowing people that were brought into it staying low keyed about what was happening,and didn’t say anything at the moment or try to stop it from happening,and just even listen,or watch at times when least expecting at wrong places at wrong times being set up,and then there’s more humility,and shame to deal with being was hard to release only more to carry on sorry for venting🥵😐😘
I now believe all the shameful experiences i had to experience,and endure never go away as their always in memories
We may always remember but, with healing, we can release the shame we carry around those experiences. Thank you for commenting.
This applies to me, except is about physical violence. I really didn’t know up till this year that I made myself accountable for the suffering, the rejection I felt from all the violence, poverty and lack of emotional, physical support. Even today I wrote down the reason why anger came for a visit. It is anger at God. I was really, really angry for what happened to me, for not being there, I still have this part of me that feels betrayed by everyone. And there are these beliefs that they run on: I am not good enough/ Nobody loves me/ Nobody wants me/ I’m unworthy.
Based on the interactions of me as a child, was “If I was worthy, how could I go through this. I must be unlovable, not enough if so much violence and poverty happened. It must mean I am being punished for not being better.”
On top of that, my nervous system was in a constant fight/flight/freeze/ and fawn responses leaving me unable to perform at school, unable to focus, unable to do anything of what I was expected to do. That brought more shaming. “Why can’t you just be more careful? Why can’t you just remember when I ask you something? Can’t you see you will never be anything if you don’t perform in school?” And I ended up really blaming me for being broken. My brain was different. I will never be able to make my mother proud. I gave up. I decided I will never be able. Still struggling with it. So much shame! Including starting this healing journey, was based on “I found a way to fix myself” and literally feeding the belief that I am broken.
Thank you for sharing your experience. All of what you shared is so incredibly common for all of us who've experienced childhood trauma. Please know you are not alone. ❤️ I, personally, struggled with these beliefs. You are not broken and there is nothing for you to feel ashamed of in what happened to you or in the ways you struggle. #notourshame #togetherweheal
Finding someone that finally gets it ❤ I don't know if I'm happy that you get it 😢 though
Knowing we are not alone is such an important part of healing and releasing shame. #togetherweheal Thank you for watching and commenting. ❤️
❤ thanks❤
You're very welcome. ❤️
Thanks sharing peggy
My pleasure. Thank you for commenting. 😊
I could really relate to this all but so much of it happened to me being kept in secret among the people that caused it to happen at the time with being set up happening when least expecting sometimes wrong place at wrong time being put into situations cause me to later being more secretive about a lot of it all in different ways with no knowing and now harder to get healings 😐sorry about this not our fault and never was and now for me never being able to heal from it entirely only to always deal with triggers,and can sometimes be flashbacks,and possibly nightmares if get proper rem sleep 💤 but eventually I know will be gone forever as I believe will happen in matter of time as I keep the Faith Hope And Never Give Up Always 🙏 Lovin’it 😐
Thank you for watching and sharing your experience. ❤️
maybe you could do a video on ritualistic abuse ?
I just wanted to say I don’t think you ever get over any of the shame because of having to endure all the humility when a lot happened,and there are always places,and triggers,and thoughts in the mind never to forget about all that happened with no escaping it being stuck in,running out of words to say,and just accepting of it all,sorry for venting here😑🥵🤡
There is no such thing as *sex* trafficking or being trafficked *for sex.* When someone uses you sexually without your consent, it is *sex.* It is *rape.*
Jesus Christ has taken my shame and washed me clean inside and out! He came to bind up the broken hearted and made me whole gradually and tenderly over a decade or more. A bruised reed He will not break and He knows better than any counsellor which stage of your pain and shame needs healing first. 🇬🇧
I'm glad you've been able to release the shame. ❤
Amen
I find from all of the many traumas there’s always i call them shameful memories,triggers,flashbacks,nightmares,when least expecting seeing it all over again,and i find this is real intense when if i’am a sleep in the middle of sleep,or it shows up if should happen to be near location place where traumas happened or even persons,and even from if drink certain herbal teàs,and then awakening from like bad dreams with memories of it all that happened which now I naturally suffer from insomnia thanks for bringing such meaningful videos being helpful understanding not being the only one having this as to say not alone in this😇🧩🦋😊😘🙏Namaste
Thank you for watching and sharing. ❤️
I have to say I’ve learned from it all about shame doesn’t go away for me,and is always within,and stays with me,and can often at times relate back to each one of many shameful times when something brings them on as something causing them to be reoccurring in memories ☺️🦋🧩
There is a lot of healing... and self-compassion necessary to be able to release shame but, it is possible. You deserve to be free from the shame you've carried. Thank you for commenting.
Thank you for bringing this reply on about being deserving of help with what is needed to endure to help with all the shame that is held within to get relief,and release from by practicing which is needed,and very deseving🙏🧩🦋🌈❤️😘 Namaste
I could relate to all your talking about,and the comments,and etc.as it all happened,and continues on,and I find myself just having to accept it all for what happened with a grain of salt I say only way as nothing can be done about it only to accept it all when faced with it,and i find this is where the 🥵humility,and shame is kept inside i’ve learned where ever i go left with no choices 🙏🧩🦋
It has never been your shame to carry. ❤️ Thank you for watching and commenting.
Thank you for this video coming out with an topic about shame which is seldom brought up or talk about because of being so sensitive,and it would he nice if you can bring more videos on about this subject so many can recognize this in them self’s,and get help with all of it which they may be carrying,and need to release 😇🧩🦋🌈❤️😘🙏 Namaste