As someone going into psychology, who has focused down relationship psychology, two healthy characters can have a very deep relationship because they give eachother something extra. Perfectly realy love is rare and itself is the endgame of mental health. Beyond stable, too enlightened.
This is the 2nd time I've ever seen it and the 1st time was months ago, so it was quite jarring to me personally, but my internet experience has given me enough context for the gag to get it.
also the argument of "oh humans are so complex you can't reduce them down to blah blah" doesn't work because Characters are not people. they are never going to be as complex as people and more importantly, they have to serve a purpose in the story. Which people don't
I'm pretty sure that was Party Dude leaving Bubbly Girl high and dry while she was still trying to escape from the shit she was going through with Serious Guy. She cries a lake of tears upon his departure, which Serious Guy starts drinking so he can... call a dinosaur to help him. Mr. Local Script Man started talking about more important things, but I wish he would have finished telling that story cause it was getting kinda good
The construction of these videos just KEEP getting better. Nothing said ever feels unnecessary - yet it's still 20 minutes long?? That's called engaging content! And incredibly clear writing advice. So good!
i’m glad that writing just to give my drawings something to do eventually gave way to considering themes to give meaning to the things my characters do
i feel you 100% i used to play ttrpgs excessively then i ran them excessively and then i realized i just wanted to boss a bunch of characters around into doing what i found narratively satisfying and now i'm screenwriting
This is why I have SUCH a bone to pick with Raphael x Mona Lisa in the 2012 run of 2012, they have NO SUBSTANCE AT ALL apart from "oh they both like fighting ig" and the conflict they have is so shallow. the WAY Raph falls for her is so shallow. yet the fandom loves it because they don't fight and kiss in every scene ig. It drives me absolutely MAD
@@jq9690 Yeah, the reason I'm so mad at Raphmona specifically is that the fandom hates every pairing for being "problematic" meanwhile they would eat Raphmona content up like hungry mice in a cage Karai x Leo is bad for obvious reasons (incest) Mikey x Renet is alright except for that one line Renet said (they met when they were teens! wdym too young for mikey) but they're boring and feel so forced April x Donnie is unironically the best pairing but even that has its caveats like uh... the STALKING SITUATION??
What you said about charm is so true. Entertaining chemistry to watch =/= chemistry that makes people pair together. A lot of sitcoms try to pair opposites romantically or as best friends, because opposites are good for comedy and conflict, but I find myself not understanding why they're so into each other.
this is just my first thought but i feel like pairing opposites works really well when they're opposites on the surface but they're the same on a deeper level. for example in b99 jake and amy appear to be total opposites. she's obsessed with organisation and he's completely disorganised, but they both are very smart people who love solving puzzles and competition. so they can come together whenever this comes up, but the way they go about it creates conflict on top.
@@janus2773 I instantly thought of b99 after reading your first paragraph. They balance differences and similarities really well. On the other hand, in The Good Place, another Michael Schur show, I never bought the main romance between Eleanor and Chidi.
@@debrachambers1304wasn't that the point as they found out it wasn't destined for them to be together as the Good Place was a botched thought experiment from the get go?
@@janus2773they had very clear reasons for wanting to spend time together though. eleanor wants to become a better person and she views chidi as a paragon + he's the first person who's really believed in her. chidi of course likes helping people and at first kinda feels he has no other option (the whole heaven charade and all that) and eleanor really values his goodness (for lack of a better term) and thus keeps coming back despite his goodness driving all his other relationships away. maybe the show could've shown more instances of them actually getting along but i do think it's obvious why they continually pair themselves together despite having clashing personalities
A few nights ago I had a dream that I went to a party in America (I'd flown from the UK), and I met you but as soon as I said "Hey! You're Local!" You looked at me, said "hey" and ran away in a comical manner.
When I started writing romantic relationships for my characters, I would make them totally co-dependent; "Guy is struggling to find meaning in life, Gal is stuck in emotionally distanced family, they fall in love and find their problems fixed . . . with each other 🥺" Guy has mental problems that would take years of therapy and community support to recover from? It's fine, he has true love! Gal needs to to separate herself and give distance so the two can function apart? It's fine, she has true love! They both already have people in their lives who could've also listened and helped them heal? It's fine, they- uhhhhhhhhhhh, nnnooooo they didn't
@@capuchinosofia4771yeah mxtx romances are fascinating on a themes level but irl their romances are codependent and unhealthy. Scum Villain is the only one to address it head on with the teacher/student, bad sex to save the world, and the satire on BL and Isekai romance tropes. MDZS at least has the mains get better at it as they grow up, so they’re pretty good. And everybody acts like HOB is perfect unproblematic fluff but that’s because they’re not old enough yet to acknowledge the sheer amount of unhealthy stuff, like for instance the fact that Hua Cheng knew him/fell in love as a child 😭😭and the codependency and blah blah blah. That’s why I feel like the most mature fans are Scum Villain fans because that’s the novel with the most aware fan base of how unhealthy it is. It’s not romanticization, but actually adult oriented and mature “portraying dark topics.” Like the fan base is still romanticizing their toxicity, but in a self-aware way that’s ironic, just like the novel. Playing with it for fun rather than for serious belief in their relationship being healthy. Mdzs is pretty good all around with its romance and themes of mob mentality. They got a few iffy fetish moments with the whole blindfolded kissing thing but then they grow up and overall they communicate and have their own things going on, they just go together because they’re the only ones who are their level of moral fiber and martial genius. Love the metatextual elements here, like even though they sound like Mary sues, within the context of the story they work because of the metatextual framing/structure obscuring their strengths. I haven’t read HOB yet but I’m really not a fan of the summary. But I love the characters I’ve heard about so far, I just truly don’t know 😭😭😭. Because there’s no drama between the two mains people act like they’re perfect as a couple, but I think having drama and growing from it is more powerful (MDZS) than a perfectly balanced codependent relationship, which is more what I’m feeling from HOB. To be fair, MXTX loves exploring unhealthy codependent characters, so it might be more of a fan base issue than a writing issue.
@@capuchinosofia4771 @allyli1718 YES!!! OMG, I was waiting for even a single person to realize some of MXTX's relationships weren't as healthy as everyone thinks they are! I feel like I'm going a little crazy when I see dozens of posts about how "Hualian invented love" when I just see a bunch of problems in their relationship that are painted over to look "romantic".
You know what's also fun to do? Have an unhealthy relationship in the background as a cautionary tale for the deuteragonists. Writing in a ghost of christmas future is a bit more difficult but also more fun imo. Mostly depends on the context though
Perfect timing! I was just wondering whether my protagonists have any reason to like each other. Now I can project myself onto their relationship, but *with style.*
Couples therapist here. I love the connection between attachment theory and writing character relationships. I highly recommend looking at lectures by Dr. Sue Johnson, who discusses adult attachment styles. Her model of couples therapy (EFT) is based on attachment theory. I think this model has been incredibly helpful in writing. Often in EFT we are talking about attachment needs, which is easy to translate in creative writing to a character need. Our attachment needs inform our interpretations and behavior associated with our partner. If we know our character’s attachment needs then we know how to create the conflict of not meeting them. You can weave superficial dialogue with attachment based subtext. Great video!
i only discovered this guy half an hour ago, and so far I’ve received so much help and excellent advice- and the way he blurred his feet has spurred me subscribe and kill myself laughing😭☝️..
7:53 Defining exactly were is the line between a romantic relationship and friendship is kinda difficult, because they are in essence, the same. Romantic and sexual attraction are different things that are not always together, so that's not a real difference (See: Asexual, Aromantic for more info.). People fall in love and that feeling is completely different than meeting a friend for the first time, sure, but that feeling of "falling in love" won't last forever and is not enough to mantain a relationship on it's own. And yeah, there may be fundamental biological and chemical differences between friendship and romance, but in the end, your romantic interest will probably be your best friend in a healthy relationship. What's the difference then? In reality, you can do with a friend anything you would do with a romantic partner, even kissing and displaying affection in romantic ways if you are comfortable with that. I believe then, that romance and friendship are just different scales on the same spectrum. Even if a friend can be a romantic partner, there's a different set of expectations attached to those roles. You can dislike certain parts of your friends, but that's more difficult in the case of a romantic partner. You could say that a romantic partner is, at the end, a much more deeper form of friendship. The first time I reached this conclusion it felt... wrong. Like there was no way romance could be so "mundane". I think this reaction comes from what we learn about love through media and the world itself. The idea of the "soulmate" and "finding the one" has become so predominant that it's difficult to see past it. Love is seen as something capable of changing your life, something that can fulfill that void in your soul and make you happy for the rest of your time. But love is not magic, it can be beautiful and fulfilling, yes, but just in the same way a friendship can be. With that said, amazing video as always :)
Very true. "Falling in love" is just the feeling of a hormonal high. Loving someone, in contrast, is a continuous choice. You wake up every morning next to that person and choose to love them regardless if they smell like roses or are looking extremely scruffy this particular morning, because it's more than just about one single moment in this relationship. There needs to be some sort of shared vision of life between them, an idea on what they are going to do together. Sure, there are relationships where people just seem to vibe together, but that's only how it appears - there is still an unsaid idea in their heads about where they see this thing going, how they consider each other, what they think about their individual trials and how they might bring their minds together to overcome them. The lovely dovey romantic comedies that paint this saccharine fairytale idea about love may as well be about doing heroin together, because that's what happens in lover's brains when it's a purely hormonal attraction. It's pure dopamine based on attraction, and their monkey brain tells them to do the thing as soon as possible and makes them all giddy from the thought. Unsurprisingly, this is also how party dudes and dudettes mix up together and end up creating a living, breathing problem for the rest of their lives - by not thinking at all and letting the chemicals they partake in or produce in their brains to do all the thinking for them.
@@delicatedream_z4105 Well, maybe? Like, obviously, there can be friendships without any romantic atraction that reaches the same levels of depth as a healthy romantic relationship. And maybe without the set of expectations that this kind of relationship carries, a friendship could in theory be more comfortable for some people than a romantic relationship. But I'm not entirely sure if you wouldn't be able to reach the same level of depth with romance. In my comment it sounds like I'm trying to say that romance is the next step for friendships, I fucked up a little bit with the wording tbh. At it's core, my tesis is that a healthy romance and a deep friendship are the same, just on different packages (holding hands, kissing, etc) so yeah, maybe it could happen, but I don't think one can be deeper than the other.
I recommed Love my Life by Ebine Yamaji. One phrase stuck to me: "the person you open to and the person you love are not always the same". A short read, yet one that left me thinking for a long while.
I think another thing that writers have to consider more is the relationships that these characters _outside_ of their romantic relations. A huge problem with a lotta writing is they don't develop friendships or family relations beyond basic archetypes or beyond being characters that just help the main character progress the plot. But the reality is that your other kinds of relationships tend to influence your choices and can as a result influence your romantic relationships (and vice versa). Is the main character's friend group an echo chamber of their same thoughts, stunting their growth as a person and letting them bypass red flags because they feed the MC's bias, or do they have independent thoughts and call the MC out when they're indulging in toxicity/doing something toxic? Does the MC have a trustworthy relationship with their parents, meaning they can go to them for advice about these types of things, or is the main character kinda forced to handle things without the proper guidance of a wiser & older person? What about authority figures that work as second parents, like teachers or coaches or a boss? Additionally, consider the hierarchy that the main character might apply to these relationships, because everyone's priorities for what relationship is more important varies - some value friends or specific friends above all else, some were raised to prioritize family, and some believe that romance is the end-all-be-all in their life. Depending what relationships a character values more, they might be more inclined to listen to that person's advice compared to the judgement of others. And - again - that can influence their choices.
re: "on kissing homies goodnight" - WAY ahead of ya there, my absurd relationship flowchart that might be more pain-in-the-ass than help in the long run but can at least help me build ideas and MAYBE keep tangled stuff straight HAS CONNECTIONS FOR ALL THE MAIN CAST, THREE OF THEM RELATED, TWO OF THEM MARRIED, ONE OF THEM THE NEW GUY IN TOWN
I'd just like to add that in long-term studies of attachment styles, it has actually been observed that attachment styles change over time. The characteristic time is several years, depending on what people you meet or what situations you get into. Which means that your experience as a little kid CAN inform your current attachment style as an adult, but it doesn't have to. And one of the common reasons for the attachment style to change are long-term relationships. I experienced that myself. In a borderline abusive relationship, I grew closer to the anxious attachment style. In a balanced loving relationship, I grew closer to the secure attachment style. Which opens up a whole new possibility for constructing a relationship story - how someone's attachment style drifts BECAUSE of their partner. It can get better, it can get worse, it can make an ex-partner's presence important to the theme, it can justify that the main character shuffles several partners. Though of course, if the story is contained in a short time period, then the respective characters' attachment styles are as good as set in stone.
If you take a look at asexual relationships, you might get more insight into what a relationship without sex looks like. Afaik, the main difference between a relationship and a friendship for asexuals, is the feeling of trust, openess, and feelings similar to those that might make you call a friend, your "brother". Except there's no "oh but they're just like a brother to me", there's just, "they're so good to me i might aswell be with them" I suppose a good way to describe it is comradery without "buts". Case in point, JR Tolkiens iirc actually experienced his british army comrades fall in love with one another, and reminisced about it in an interview (this is just from my memory of a tumblr post, i suggest you do some research on this). There's a fine line between comradery and love in that sense. A fine line, which i think is primarily kept due to, well, a myriad of things: from society's influence on us (the eteronormativity, for example. This is probably just a terminally-online me thing, but i truly believe that most people are pansexuals with internalized homophobia.); our natural disposition and parent-style (as in, how our parents interacted with our unique baby form's ingrained personality); our friendships (LGBTQ+ accepting groups will more naturally lead you to question things that a heteronormative group might not. For better and for worse.); and in general, anything we learn in our baby and teen years. of course, this is just from my limited understanding of the psychology behind love. And, also, with a very limited list of possible reasons as to why someone might be with their partner. It's more than a spectrum, but one thing's for sure: Our life experiences clashing against our innate personality, dictate (in known and unknown ways) how we will turn out, and nothing else.* *afaik
Local I feel like you're the only youtuber who actually gives real, actionable advice. By knowing what you're talking about and practicing what you preach you actually inspire me to use these methods. I want to emphasize again how actionable it is, the drawn bubbly girl example is frighteningly helpful.
I tend to use the attachment scale not just for romantic relationships, but also friendships between characters in general, especially if I want to write toxic codependent friendships. It’s useful advice.
this is video is great and is also 100% the reason i watch love is blind it is purely for the academic and educational aspects to apply to my writing and nothing else
Your video flow/ monologue is SO satisfying. Idk if that is the best way to express the feeling I get from listening to you, but I guess it makes sense you are a writer. You hit the nail on the head when writing your “script” for your videos… about writing.
Your videos are so goddamn insightful and entertaining at the same time, idk how you do it so consistently. The content alone is enough to make me stay, but then you go and do these engaging visuals (in fucking paint) with fun jokes to boot.
This was super helpful. I'm writing a romance right now, and avoiding all the stupid tropes is not enough to make me like my own writing. Thank you for sharing.
One of my favorite romances I've written: One party has this incessant need to harm himself and others, which is caused by his PTSD. So, as a healthier alternative to self harm, he fights bad guys. A lot. Other guy doesn't enjoy fighting that much, but has lost someone due to not being strong enough, and to make sure that doesn't happen again, he also starts fighting. A lot. Then they bump into each other, try to kill the other party, fail, realize the other one is really good, reconcile and decide to fight more often. Which somehow develops into a relationship based mostly on consentual ass-whooping. And they're surprisingly healthy! I know they aren't very realistic and they're not meant to be. Writing their interactions is extremely fun, as they can go from wiping the floor with the other's face to cuddling and reading books together. And writing fun dynamics is my favorite thing. A more toxic one of my relationships consists of a guy who literally and figuratively breaks his back for a girl that gave his, previously pointless life, meaning. Except she doesn't see it that way and just treats him like a co-worker while the other treats her like a goddess (she's actually a war criminal lol). Then there's the girl that escaped from a cult and tries to live a more normal life, and the hippy peaceful mountaineer who tries to explain to her that sacrificing infants is, in fact, bad. Thought that last one is not really romantic? I dunno, all I know is they're fun to write :P Sorry for any mistakes, English isn't my 1st language
I just can't get over how good this is. Literally zero bullshit. You only convey what is necessary and you do it efficiently while still being entertaining. You even have a good visual aid, unlike most writing youtubers who just talk at a camera. Again: Zero. Bullshit.
Your videos are both educational and validating. It's easy to understand and phrased in a way that makes it clear that this is advice and not a rule written in stone - while not sounding insecure about the validity of your advice either. I'm not only learning new things, but also evaluating my existing ideas differently. The obsessive romance I've been writing doesn't "just click", but I somewhat accidentally gave them really strong reasons to be together. And now that I know that everything will be revolve around these reasons, I have a second angle to look at my scenes from!
I feel like these are always the perfect videos, uploaded at the perfect time, perfectly. Literally some of the most helpful writing advice I've ever heard, every time (and I've gone through a *lot* of unhelpful advice).
The continuity of the wine glass being filled and drank is a cherry on top of the wonderful points in this video. You Inspire me to be a better writer. I would have been good but you inspire greatness with the layering of education and comedy in your works. Keep on your path, and may you inspire others in your future lives like you have inspired myself and others in this one.
something that i find really useful about your vids is that you expose the underlying ideas behind writing certain aspects of characters, which i personally find way more helpful than stuff like “well your story needs a 3 act structure and a climax and resolution etc etc” because understanding how to create the characters that drive that story structure and how they work in internally drives me more. like i actually start thinking about WHAT actually happens in a point in a story because im now thinking about the character thats central to the narrative, rather “dang i need to have an inciting incident” and not knowing what to do because im more focused on a plot checklist than the character/theme. Even some stuff you bring up like “characters need something out of a relationship” which i was already aware of on some subconscious level is great to bring up because now im more focused on it, whereas before even though i did address these things somewhat, they were half baked and not tied into the character’s arcs or the overall theme if that makes sense. love your vids!
Geez, you voiced basically everything Ive been thinking about fictional romances in this video. It really gets on my nerves when people throw their characters together “for the vibes” without any thought of how the whole romance is going to actually fit with the characters’ motivations. And honestly it’s so much more satisfying (and emotionally devastating at times) when romantically involved characters have foils with their arcs. Great video, I applaud you
I think one thing about attachment theory is that anxious attachments don't always pursue avoidant. In my experience it's been the other way around. I think it's more that anxious and avoidant both want the other to validate them.
Why are Romeo and Juliet attracted to each other? After going over it a few times in my head, there isn't realy a reason. Each half of the couple even has other people they could be paired with, but it's never shown or explained why they simply have to be together and not with anyone else. They each wax poetical about how the other is just so irresistible, Romeo in partiuclar making a comically awkward metaphor appropriate to his lovesick teenage character about how Juliet's eyes shine brighter than the sun and you just get this image of a human floodlight as though Juliet were cyclops from _Xmen,_ but all this serves is to highlight how nothing about this attraction is rooted in a definable need that the other fulfills. "She's just prettier than the other girls," isn't a need. The only reasons actually given by the story and any of the characters explictly are, -- Destiny -- Spontaneous romantic chemistry -- The thematic allusion to the two houses: Romeo and Juliet love each other because their houses hate each other You will notice that none of these offer a conrete motive and may as well be tautological: They love each other because they love each other. Determinism is the antithesis of motivation, spontaneity likewise, and finally no particular reason is given for why Montague and Capulet are in a feud. The conflict is already in progress when the play begins. The play is quite aware of this and seems to find a certain mystery and purity in it. The imag eof love at play is not that Romeo and Juliet are somehow deeply special but the opposite in that when a romance happens in any case, when two people are compelled to be together, it is the will of God. The ritual of marriage is supposed to reflect this. According to our values, this is how every relationship would be. But society is not particularly wary of what it wishes for. In any event, divorce is so common these days that this image isn't very credible. And indeed, other cricumstances bring the relationship to a disaster. The kind of relationship Romeo and Juliet represent is just as dead in our public consciousness as the characters are by the end of the play. (Romeo racking up quite a kill count in collateral on his way to the grave.) Which leads me to consider whether or not the ideal of totally absorbed eternal infatuation with another person was not a product of marriage as an institution rather than the other way around. We need reasons for people to be in love now because we've had such a buffet of sour grapes where the lovers have ulterior motives or just don't get along; where this fantasy is destroyed; psycho analysis being the fruit of wisdom we get as compensation for our fall from grace. Part of the point of the play is just that such a love is too good for this earth in line with the christian ideal of spirt being the real thing over matter: "And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for. thee that one of thy members should perish, and. not that thy whole body should be cast into hell." -- Matt 5:29 Romeo and Juliet are the fantasy while Montague and Capulet represent the social and political menutia of the real world. Sorry, Shad. There may be some worth to the dream of the perfect marriage, but it is no resolution for despair but rather it's source. If people no longer desired perfect relationships, they would stand better odds of living in the real world. The main reason people get divorced is because they have wildly excessive expectations. Marriage symbolizes a fantasy but is really entirely pragmatic. You can't get people to do it anymore by making them dream at night about it. Man cannnot live on the word of God alone. He needs bread. But to get back to writing, we don't need the story to come prepared with a fillibuster justifying why Romeo and Juliet must be together because there are plenty fo interesting dynamics at play without it and that's the real purpose of trying to ground these things in the first place. If anything, the relationship itself is quite insipid. That is the nature of infatuation. Shakespeare doesn't shy away from the spectacle of two dipsticks acting out a tale collective and as old as time as though it were something uniquely personal.
From what I heard Romeo and Juliet was supposed to be a centrical comedy. Their attraction was supposed to be ridiculous and their death at the end was supposed to hammer that point home.
Something that often gets lost in all the adaptations and general understanding is that Romeo is 16 and Juliet is 13. They're dumb horny kids that are feeling something they've never felt before - hormones running wild on their immature brains - and they have no societal framework that explains it aside from overly elaborate poetry. That is why they set everything around them on fire and completely destroyed themselves as well. It's two dumb children acting out because their families are too busy backstabbing each other and don't pay attention to their kids.
I disagree. The way they are paired makes sense for at least Romeo because early in the play its established that Romeo is someone who fixates on people. Im not sure the term for it, but he finds someone and becomes obsessed with them but his interest only lasts for short periods of time. Juliet was just the next girl he was going to try to be with before he got bored and moved on (if he lived long enough to do it lol).
Jesus F. Christ. I feel like I just found the gold without the crap that the other "Writing Consultant" people throw at me just to sell their service/book. Please don't leave me. Ever.
Thank uou for giving such clear guidance on how to build up stories and characters. So many other pages just focus on the top errors made and don't actually help correct for the issues. Or they give such specific correction that it isn't applicable across the board. Your ability to generalize the guidance and show random examples of how guidelines work across genres is extremely helpful. Your presentation also makes it fun to watch and learn.
I just love these vids, bro. I like how you ask writers to challenge their characters' beliefs. I still remember the vid about how to make really good dialogue; it really opened my eyes. And it wasn't because of all the small bits that make a good dialogue (subtext, etc.), but because I saw you create it. I would love to see more vids like that. Theory is good and all, but practice is necessary. When starting out, I don't have a reference point, and I would love to see someone with actual experience write something. Anything would do; writing dialogue, writing visual images of scenery, how to set up a fight, etc; It gives us something to compare our work with. So thank you for your work and the time you put into making these videos. Keep up the good work.
I jump with joy every time u mention enneagram in ur videos btw it makes me grin so wide. I love enneagram it’s so GOOD for characters/character writing and it can easily add more depth to a character that was otherwise lacking. Also it just tickles me pink as a writer that’s also got a major special interest in psychology
I’m so glad I came across your videos!!! I’m a writer but I took screenwriting classes in college (by far, the BEST advice I got was from this class compared to other fiction writing classes) and it’s very refreshing to see actual good advice on here.
this is big for me cause i want to start writing some good relationships but i do not know how people actually talk to each other lmao, this helps for sure
I love this advice, and specifically because it still leaves room for the Terminally Online Types, so long as they DO BETTER. I enjoy participating in fandoms with huge ensemble casts and I almost always end up shipping characters with almost every other character, because it's possible to identify ways that the cast meets each other's emotional needs in romantic contexts. Take a character who's an Artsy Type. Passionate, determined, kinda airheaded and bad at social cues. Would they be well-matched with a Practical Type who helps Artsy balance flights of fancy with reality while Practical enjoys the beauty that Artsy brings to their life? What about a Free-Spirit Type who learns discipline and ambition from Artsy, but in turn teaches Artsy how to shake off criticism and move on from life's bullshit? Or maybe a character who looks completely opposite to Artsy, a Science Type, but when they see past their surface-level differences, they realize they share common values, like passion for new discoveries/creations. There's no such thing as a single soul mate for a character because all kinds of characters fulfill all kinds of emotional needs. It ends up proving the point that if you have an entire cast of characters and no one fulfills anyone's emotional needs, even theoretically, you have a very flat and under-developed cast. Well-developed characters naturally lend themselves to romance because their clear personalities and motivations create unique dynamics in a wide variety of situations.
Hello Sir, mad respect. You're videos and writing process is a breath of fresh air in the vast and convoluted online world. The shear insight and charisma is always appreciated by us, and your no-bullshit analysis concept is brilliant. These videos you produce are compelling and eye opening. I tilt my hat to you
this entire channel for me is 'never before have i been so offended by something i 100% agree with' (as a person giving my drawings something to do) for this, i thank you.
i love these videos because they speak my language to a T. im a blunt, to the point, tough love kind of person and for some reason advice videos on creative writing just don’t get through to me. these videos help me see my writing more impartially and since i’m studying psychology, thinking more logically about my character’s voices and interactions is making them more 3 dimensional. ive looked into enneagram and attachment theory for so long without applying them to my characters so thanks 🤞🏽
Funny how inadvertently created two characters that are the two extremes anxious and avoidance. I didnt knew about this stuff yet it felt akwardly natural for them to get into the other. Is not just the context of a lot of shit going (traumatic experiences, copium mechanism) and both being first "forced" to be together wtih an on going conflict and then feeling "secure" with each other when they start finding tools to work their relationship. Its also how one tries constantly to get the other attention failing at this feeling insecure and confused to then eventually giving up and starting to realize "wait Im fine by myself lol" which pushes the other character to move toward the other when it feels rather than conciously see that she wants her. Now I have to develop this and decide what type of closure I will give to them. But I just really liked how this helped me to have a much more clear structure to work with.
This dropped at EXACTLY. THE RIGHT TIME. I just started on a dream fanfic abt (the apocolypse, coping with grief and trauma lol) two old who lost everything and now only have each other and have to survive, and i'm figuring out how to write their relationship and the conflicts in it. The WalkingDead ref caught me off guard because it was also what i needed (though they are each other's only option, it's more like realising their feelings for one another and actually confronting them instead of letting it fester and pushing eachother away and actually coping in a *healthy* way.) I was on the edge of my seat the whole time, you kept dropping PLATINUM nuggets of new information that I actually needed (some i didn;t even KNOW i needed) Thank you Local for bringing us romantically struggling writers' problems out into the light and giving us the tools to fix it lol. Also congrats on the new wine-and-lake-piracy lifestyle!! It's really awesome to see you have success from what you're doing. :DD Things for me to work torward lol.
Amazing video as always. Concise, well explained, and structured in a way that holds my attention (I have ADHD and I find it difficult to follow content generally). This being said, in case you come across this comment, a question that bugs me most of the time while I'm writing/thinking about ideas etc. is, how do you get from A. (idea, character, world) to B. (an actual story) the fastest? When I use a solid structure I get into analysis paralysis, while by not using one I end up writing stuff that goes nowhere. Thank you!
Watching this has actually made me feel a lot more confident in one of the relationships I've been writing. A quick check of my notes confirmed that both characters get something from the other, and while they definitely aren't perfect to start, their respective strengths and weaknesses... kinda balance each other out. I have no clue how I stumbled into this, but I'm happy I did. This video has also helped expand my framework for writing in new relationships if I ever find that necessary. Edit: After further thinking, I've even realized the pairing is Anxious/Avoidant, and I don't even have to change their existing backstories for facilitate a clash. One's a prince who's mom died when he was little and has a very strict dad. He hasn't gotten nearly as much love as he's needed, and the other is a Princess of a destroyed kingdom who never got to know her parents, leading her to feel closed off and outside of the real world, so human connection is somewhat alien and unnerving for her.
As a person on aroace spectrum, your comment about romance being strutrually similar to friendship is very interesting. It it also important to note that romantic and sexual attraction can exist independently. Some people can be involved in romance without sex, others the other way around. All those types of relationship can be healthy. They also add diversity to the story
this video actually highlight that characters and people really are not that different. the only real difference is that one is real and the other is fiction.
I really love this framework on character relationships, this is not the first time I've known about them too. It's not that it's a given rule, but rather it reflects on real life relationships since we do want to love the person we need(arranged relationships tend to be at risk of dispute). If we had character A and character B be in a relationship where both are independent from one another, it would make their relationship dull, and could also be used as framework for a story where both characters face a falling relationship due to their lack of connection. A good example of a great character relationship would be Marcelline and Princess bubblegum. They don't necessarily require each other to function, they can live their lives with ease but they have visible deficiencies without each other. When they had finally reconnected and started dating again we can see from the episode Obsidian that they are living more healthy lives together, they aren't co-dependent they are complementary. And I'd also like to mention Amphibia since i just finished the series. We have three characters in an unhealthy friendship Anne, Sasha and Marcy. Marcy is the clumsy nerd and Anne is the dumb one in the team, that's where Sasha siezes the role as their protector and leader with a control complex. Anne lacks sesne of self and she's constantly pushed around, Sasha is obsessed with having control and Marcy can't keep herself together if she's isolated. They are very co-dependent of each other that when they begin to change they are conflicted with one another. To fix their crippling friendship they have to overcome challenges and learn to accept that everything will change in the grand scheme of time. They were so caught up in the fantasy where they could keep doing things as they were. Unhealthy relationships are very compelling because there is alot of room for improvement. Western media isn't very favoured as I've seen, but i love to dig out stories that stretch for hours, so nothing's better than watching a cartoon series similar to Adventure time. I could go on for hours talking about it lmao.
I've been listening to your videos while I clean, and I just happened to look up and noticed you were on a boat with your feet blurred 🤣🤣 Freaking brilliant. Thank you for all your hard work trying to help others! And the laughs 😸
i absolutely love the framing in your videos man. the unhealthy relationships segment where its just a speck of you on the field is my favourite. also your art style gradually gets better, the mouths on the characters is one sign of that. i hope you keep being this wonky and whimsical as your channel grows.
I appreciate the feet blurring, also you could sum up all your videos in one word "causality"😂, keep up the good work, probably one of my favorite writing channels.
i thought this video was rather helpful, and i wanted to share some thoughts! about the reflection on the purpose of healthy relationships, i wanted to add something. rather than being applicable to supporting characters, i also like to mention the possibility of the relationship itself being a backdrop (although this is a slight genre swap from the discussion proper). the kinds of relationships that don't contain particular development or thematic relevance, and only exist as the bond between two self-sufficient characters, are really good to add some levity or emotional value to an actual, proper plot that doesn't have anything to do with the romance. so instead of crystal and her friend fighting monsters, we can have crystal and her girlfriend fighting monsters. many people prefer it this way, although i must warn that this relationship type is the exact opposite of a slow-burn, and does not fit onto a slow-burn framework. slow-burn romances with little to no development or thematic relevance tend to just be exercises in wasting time. (this isn't to say your main plot slow burn relationship can't start quickly, slow-burn is when a relationship is developed over the course of an entire story, waiting a million years for a relationship to start is just called baiting and i'd advise against it in most cases.) a second point on the section about the distinction between relationships and friendships, i'd like to say that even in real life, i'm of the opinion that relationships and friendships are not very distinct. i think this because i have a somewhat unique perspective as a hyperromantic polyamorous person, and so my "friend" attraction and my "partner" attraction tend to be one and the same. although i feel i must state that even if you're not like me, i still think a romantic relationship that resembles anything close to health *should* be first and foremost a strong friendship. my spouse is, sure, the person i sleep with and smooch on the face, but primarily they are my best friend. and i think this dynamic is enlightening, because, as you said, writing friendships is also aided through usage of your model. an interesting and healthy friendship that gets any time or development *should* be made of those moving parts with mutual needs and wants and themes. and lastly, i'd like to have a talk about something. this model seems to only really be applicable to people who are drawn to each other, either as friends or as partners. can any of this advice be applied to the "relationship" between two opposed characters? and i think the bit about the relationship characters fighting or experiencing a rough patch might be enlightening here, but i'm having trouble thinking of what. and also, this model is at least mostly predecated on mutual needs and wants, right? it's hard for me to think of a situation in which two diametrically opposed characters are looking to fulfill a need with one another, aside from me "stop destroying the planet/let me destroy the planet you asshole". so, maybe this model in its entirety is only useful for aligned relationships between characters, but i was curious if anyone had any thoughts on how this principle could be used to help create interesting and dynamic antagonistic relationships. thanks for reading! have a good one.
The first 100 people to use code LOCALSCRIPTMAN at the link below will get 60% off of Incogni: incogni.com/localscriptman
Unblur them.
As someone going into psychology, who has focused down relationship psychology, two healthy characters can have a very deep relationship because they give eachother something extra. Perfectly realy love is rare and itself is the endgame of mental health. Beyond stable, too enlightened.
How..DARE you sensor your toesies.
Imagine accidentally giving good dating advice while teaching people how to write
What the fuck AAAAAAAHHAHHWHSHSHWHAAA
And fighting pirates.
There's no way it wasn't intentional, none of y'all are writers
@@not_some_random You're right. I am actually Billy Wilder
@@riverman6462 And I am both the Coen Brothers.
Censoring feet online is still my favorite gag everytime I see it.
Same 😂
Rob Liefeld: Take all my money
Literally laughed the first time he showed up on screen- this day in age on the internet is insane 😭😭
I’m so used to it I didn’t even notice until you pointed it out 😂
This is the 2nd time I've ever seen it and the 1st time was months ago, so it was quite jarring to me personally, but my internet experience has given me enough context for the gag to get it.
also the argument of "oh humans are so complex you can't reduce them down to blah blah" doesn't work because Characters are not people. they are never going to be as complex as people and more importantly, they have to serve a purpose in the story. Which people don't
My guy is giving possible relationship advice and writing advice at the same time…while fending off pirates, a true hero.
For real.
peak fiction
he is gonna turn me into an actual good writer
yea no way (just kidding)
Probably. If you're willing to learn.
If you practice writing you'll get better even faster.
@@filiformisTook your advice! Thanks
Same! 😂
the quip about chronically online people projecting themselves onto characters was just perfect, shit's mad annoying
😭
😭
Listening to that really felt like he was reaching out of the screen and slapping me across the face lol
@@hamos4744good
Literally me.
Dude. You have by far the most creative format while making it seem so freaking effortless. Great
Thanks dawg
I hope Party Dude makes it back to his home planet safely.
I'm pretty sure that was Party Dude leaving Bubbly Girl high and dry while she was still trying to escape from the shit she was going through with Serious Guy. She cries a lake of tears upon his departure, which Serious Guy starts drinking so he can... call a dinosaur to help him. Mr. Local Script Man started talking about more important things, but I wish he would have finished telling that story cause it was getting kinda good
Holy shit, was the tale of Serious Guy, Bubbly Girl, and Party Dude just Grant, Sattler, and Malcolm from Jurassic Park all along?
Probably. Imagination is the greatest thief
The construction of these videos just KEEP getting better. Nothing said ever feels unnecessary - yet it's still 20 minutes long?? That's called engaging content! And incredibly clear writing advice. So good!
Thank you!
@@localscriptmanI want your brain. I will take your advice and it will be mine 👁️
you could say the video has "good pacing"
These replies are gold lol
"Life didn't evolve through organisms meeting each other's mental health needs" is a pick up line
best one I've heard in a while tbh
i’m glad that writing just to give my drawings something to do eventually gave way to considering themes to give meaning to the things my characters do
i feel you 100% i used to play ttrpgs excessively then i ran them excessively and then i realized i just wanted to boss a bunch of characters around into doing what i found narratively satisfying and now i'm screenwriting
@@aretzuuYou.....did not have to call me out like that. 😢
I didnt know charming relationships in stories could be shallow :O
Ikr crazy
This is why I have SUCH a bone to pick with Raphael x Mona Lisa in the 2012 run of 2012, they have NO SUBSTANCE AT ALL apart from "oh they both like fighting ig" and the conflict they have is so shallow. the WAY Raph falls for her is so shallow. yet the fandom loves it because they don't fight and kiss in every scene ig. It drives me absolutely MAD
@@jq9690 Yeah, the reason I'm so mad at Raphmona specifically is that the fandom hates every pairing for being "problematic" meanwhile they would eat Raphmona content up like hungry mice in a cage
Karai x Leo is bad for obvious reasons (incest)
Mikey x Renet is alright except for that one line Renet said (they met when they were teens! wdym too young for mikey) but they're boring and feel so forced
April x Donnie is unironically the best pairing but even that has its caveats like uh... the STALKING SITUATION??
What you said about charm is so true. Entertaining chemistry to watch =/= chemistry that makes people pair together. A lot of sitcoms try to pair opposites romantically or as best friends, because opposites are good for comedy and conflict, but I find myself not understanding why they're so into each other.
this is just my first thought but i feel like pairing opposites works really well when they're opposites on the surface but they're the same on a deeper level.
for example in b99 jake and amy appear to be total opposites. she's obsessed with organisation and he's completely disorganised, but they both are very smart people who love solving puzzles and competition. so they can come together whenever this comes up, but the way they go about it creates conflict on top.
@@janus2773 I instantly thought of b99 after reading your first paragraph. They balance differences and similarities really well.
On the other hand, in The Good Place, another Michael Schur show, I never bought the main romance between Eleanor and Chidi.
yeah i agree elanor and chidi didnt have too much chemistry imo
@@debrachambers1304wasn't that the point as they found out it wasn't destined for them to be together as the Good Place was a botched thought experiment from the get go?
@@janus2773they had very clear reasons for wanting to spend time together though. eleanor wants to become a better person and she views chidi as a paragon + he's the first person who's really believed in her. chidi of course likes helping people and at first kinda feels he has no other option (the whole heaven charade and all that) and eleanor really values his goodness (for lack of a better term) and thus keeps coming back despite his goodness driving all his other relationships away. maybe the show could've shown more instances of them actually getting along but i do think it's obvious why they continually pair themselves together despite having clashing personalities
Only the best TH-camrs can make a video about character relationships while drunk driving a boat
Bro had an a subplot about escaping from pirates 💀
19:20 did serious-guy just drink bubbly-girl's tears there
A few nights ago I had a dream that I went to a party in America (I'd flown from the UK), and I met you but as soon as I said "Hey! You're Local!" You looked at me, said "hey" and ran away in a comical manner.
I remember
@@localscriptman Hey! You're Local!
@@floorcollapsing yoink
This is a clear anxious/avoidant interaction.
When I started writing romantic relationships for my characters, I would make them totally co-dependent;
"Guy is struggling to find meaning in life, Gal is stuck in emotionally distanced family, they fall in love and find their problems fixed . . . with each other 🥺"
Guy has mental problems that would take years of therapy and community support to recover from? It's fine, he has true love! Gal needs to to separate herself and give distance so the two can function apart? It's fine, she has true love!
They both already have people in their lives who could've also listened and helped them heal? It's fine, they- uhhhhhhhhhhh, nnnooooo they didn't
oh no, I just realized Hua Cheng and Xie Lian is..., almost like that? Oh noes dksoijdaisjdoas
@@capuchinosofia4771yeah mxtx romances are fascinating on a themes level but irl their romances are codependent and unhealthy. Scum Villain is the only one to address it head on with the teacher/student, bad sex to save the world, and the satire on BL and Isekai romance tropes. MDZS at least has the mains get better at it as they grow up, so they’re pretty good.
And everybody acts like HOB is perfect unproblematic fluff but that’s because they’re not old enough yet to acknowledge the sheer amount of unhealthy stuff, like for instance the fact that Hua Cheng knew him/fell in love as a child 😭😭and the codependency and blah blah blah.
That’s why I feel like the most mature fans are Scum Villain fans because that’s the novel with the most aware fan base of how unhealthy it is. It’s not romanticization, but actually adult oriented and mature “portraying dark topics.” Like the fan base is still romanticizing their toxicity, but in a self-aware way that’s ironic, just like the novel. Playing with it for fun rather than for serious belief in their relationship being healthy.
Mdzs is pretty good all around with its romance and themes of mob mentality. They got a few iffy fetish moments with the whole blindfolded kissing thing but then they grow up and overall they communicate and have their own things going on, they just go together because they’re the only ones who are their level of moral fiber and martial genius. Love the metatextual elements here, like even though they sound like Mary sues, within the context of the story they work because of the metatextual framing/structure obscuring their strengths.
I haven’t read HOB yet but I’m really not a fan of the summary. But I love the characters I’ve heard about so far, I just truly don’t know 😭😭😭. Because there’s no drama between the two mains people act like they’re perfect as a couple, but I think having drama and growing from it is more powerful (MDZS) than a perfectly balanced codependent relationship, which is more what I’m feeling from HOB. To be fair, MXTX loves exploring unhealthy codependent characters, so it might be more of a fan base issue than a writing issue.
@@capuchinosofia4771
@allyli1718
YES!!! OMG, I was waiting for even a single person to realize some of MXTX's relationships weren't as healthy as everyone thinks they are! I feel like I'm going a little crazy when I see dozens of posts about how "Hualian invented love" when I just see a bunch of problems in their relationship that are painted over to look "romantic".
You know what's also fun to do?
Have an unhealthy relationship in the background as a cautionary tale for the deuteragonists. Writing in a ghost of christmas future is a bit more difficult but also more fun imo. Mostly depends on the context though
18:45 Local basically summed up every single bad love polygon story, and fixed all of them in 20 minutes. Genius
it's basically Closer (2004)
Bro's fending off pirates AND Tarantino while making this video. Truly one of the youtubers of all time.
Perfect timing! I was just wondering whether my protagonists have any reason to like each other.
Now I can project myself onto their relationship, but *with style.*
Couples therapist here. I love the connection between attachment theory and writing character relationships. I highly recommend looking at lectures by Dr. Sue Johnson, who discusses adult attachment styles. Her model of couples therapy (EFT) is based on attachment theory. I think this model has been incredibly helpful in writing. Often in EFT we are talking about attachment needs, which is easy to translate in creative writing to a character need. Our attachment needs inform our interpretations and behavior associated with our partner. If we know our character’s attachment needs then we know how to create the conflict of not meeting them. You can weave superficial dialogue with attachment based subtext. Great video!
Please like my comment so I can come back here.
It's hard to write relationships when you are rizzless.
i only discovered this guy half an hour ago, and so far I’ve received so much help and excellent advice- and the way he blurred his feet has spurred me subscribe and kill myself laughing😭☝️..
7:53 Defining exactly were is the line between a romantic relationship and friendship is kinda difficult, because they are in essence, the same. Romantic and sexual attraction are different things that are not always together, so that's not a real difference (See: Asexual, Aromantic for more info.). People fall in love and that feeling is completely different than meeting a friend for the first time, sure, but that feeling of "falling in love" won't last forever and is not enough to mantain a relationship on it's own. And yeah, there may be fundamental biological and chemical differences between friendship and romance, but in the end, your romantic interest will probably be your best friend in a healthy relationship. What's the difference then? In reality, you can do with a friend anything you would do with a romantic partner, even kissing and displaying affection in romantic ways if you are comfortable with that. I believe then, that romance and friendship are just different scales on the same spectrum. Even if a friend can be a romantic partner, there's a different set of expectations attached to those roles. You can dislike certain parts of your friends, but that's more difficult in the case of a romantic partner. You could say that a romantic partner is, at the end, a much more deeper form of friendship.
The first time I reached this conclusion it felt... wrong. Like there was no way romance could be so "mundane". I think this reaction comes from what we learn about love through media and the world itself. The idea of the "soulmate" and "finding the one" has become so predominant that it's difficult to see past it. Love is seen as something capable of changing your life, something that can fulfill that void in your soul and make you happy for the rest of your time. But love is not magic, it can be beautiful and fulfilling, yes, but just in the same way a friendship can be.
With that said, amazing video as always :)
Very true. "Falling in love" is just the feeling of a hormonal high. Loving someone, in contrast, is a continuous choice. You wake up every morning next to that person and choose to love them regardless if they smell like roses or are looking extremely scruffy this particular morning, because it's more than just about one single moment in this relationship. There needs to be some sort of shared vision of life between them, an idea on what they are going to do together. Sure, there are relationships where people just seem to vibe together, but that's only how it appears - there is still an unsaid idea in their heads about where they see this thing going, how they consider each other, what they think about their individual trials and how they might bring their minds together to overcome them.
The lovely dovey romantic comedies that paint this saccharine fairytale idea about love may as well be about doing heroin together, because that's what happens in lover's brains when it's a purely hormonal attraction. It's pure dopamine based on attraction, and their monkey brain tells them to do the thing as soon as possible and makes them all giddy from the thought. Unsurprisingly, this is also how party dudes and dudettes mix up together and end up creating a living, breathing problem for the rest of their lives - by not thinking at all and letting the chemicals they partake in or produce in their brains to do all the thinking for them.
Just commenting to re read this later
Isn't it possible to have friendships that'll always be deeper than any romance you'll have though?
@@delicatedream_z4105 Well, maybe? Like, obviously, there can be friendships without any romantic atraction that reaches the same levels of depth as a healthy romantic relationship. And maybe without the set of expectations that this kind of relationship carries, a friendship could in theory be more comfortable for some people than a romantic relationship. But I'm not entirely sure if you wouldn't be able to reach the same level of depth with romance.
In my comment it sounds like I'm trying to say that romance is the next step for friendships, I fucked up a little bit with the wording tbh. At it's core, my tesis is that a healthy romance and a deep friendship are the same, just on different packages (holding hands, kissing, etc) so yeah, maybe it could happen, but I don't think one can be deeper than the other.
I recommed Love my Life by Ebine Yamaji. One phrase stuck to me: "the person you open to and the person you love are not always the same". A short read, yet one that left me thinking for a long while.
I think another thing that writers have to consider more is the relationships that these characters _outside_ of their romantic relations. A huge problem with a lotta writing is they don't develop friendships or family relations beyond basic archetypes or beyond being characters that just help the main character progress the plot. But the reality is that your other kinds of relationships tend to influence your choices and can as a result influence your romantic relationships (and vice versa). Is the main character's friend group an echo chamber of their same thoughts, stunting their growth as a person and letting them bypass red flags because they feed the MC's bias, or do they have independent thoughts and call the MC out when they're indulging in toxicity/doing something toxic? Does the MC have a trustworthy relationship with their parents, meaning they can go to them for advice about these types of things, or is the main character kinda forced to handle things without the proper guidance of a wiser & older person? What about authority figures that work as second parents, like teachers or coaches or a boss?
Additionally, consider the hierarchy that the main character might apply to these relationships, because everyone's priorities for what relationship is more important varies - some value friends or specific friends above all else, some were raised to prioritize family, and some believe that romance is the end-all-be-all in their life. Depending what relationships a character values more, they might be more inclined to listen to that person's advice compared to the judgement of others. And - again - that can influence their choices.
I really like how you branched out from bubbly girl and serious guy. you got me invested
re: "on kissing homies goodnight" - WAY ahead of ya there, my absurd relationship flowchart that might be more pain-in-the-ass than help in the long run but can at least help me build ideas and MAYBE keep tangled stuff straight HAS CONNECTIONS FOR ALL THE MAIN CAST, THREE OF THEM RELATED, TWO OF THEM MARRIED, ONE OF THEM THE NEW GUY IN TOWN
Localscriptman spitting so many straight facts he forced me to get outta bed and grab my writing notebook
I'd just like to add that in long-term studies of attachment styles, it has actually been observed that attachment styles change over time. The characteristic time is several years, depending on what people you meet or what situations you get into. Which means that your experience as a little kid CAN inform your current attachment style as an adult, but it doesn't have to. And one of the common reasons for the attachment style to change are long-term relationships. I experienced that myself. In a borderline abusive relationship, I grew closer to the anxious attachment style. In a balanced loving relationship, I grew closer to the secure attachment style. Which opens up a whole new possibility for constructing a relationship story - how someone's attachment style drifts BECAUSE of their partner. It can get better, it can get worse, it can make an ex-partner's presence important to the theme, it can justify that the main character shuffles several partners. Though of course, if the story is contained in a short time period, then the respective characters' attachment styles are as good as set in stone.
Hey the guy has gotten better at drawing the little guys
If you take a look at asexual relationships, you might get more insight into what a relationship without sex looks like.
Afaik, the main difference between a relationship and a friendship for asexuals, is the feeling of trust, openess, and feelings similar to those that might make you call a friend, your "brother". Except there's no "oh but they're just like a brother to me", there's just, "they're so good to me i might aswell be with them"
I suppose a good way to describe it is comradery without "buts". Case in point, JR Tolkiens iirc actually experienced his british army comrades fall in love with one another, and reminisced about it in an interview (this is just from my memory of a tumblr post, i suggest you do some research on this). There's a fine line between comradery and love in that sense. A fine line, which i think is primarily kept due to, well, a myriad of things: from society's influence on us (the eteronormativity, for example. This is probably just a terminally-online me thing, but i truly believe that most people are pansexuals with internalized homophobia.); our natural disposition and parent-style (as in, how our parents interacted with our unique baby form's ingrained personality); our friendships (LGBTQ+ accepting groups will more naturally lead you to question things that a heteronormative group might not. For better and for worse.); and in general, anything we learn in our baby and teen years.
of course, this is just from my limited understanding of the psychology behind love. And, also, with a very limited list of possible reasons as to why someone might be with their partner.
It's more than a spectrum, but one thing's for sure: Our life experiences clashing against our innate personality, dictate (in known and unknown ways) how we will turn out, and nothing else.*
*afaik
Local I feel like you're the only youtuber who actually gives real, actionable advice. By knowing what you're talking about and practicing what you preach you actually inspire me to use these methods. I want to emphasize again how actionable it is, the drawn bubbly girl example is frighteningly helpful.
Thanks dawg
I tend to use the attachment scale not just for romantic relationships, but also friendships between characters in general, especially if I want to write toxic codependent friendships. It’s useful advice.
All video essays should take place on a boat evading pirates
this is video is great and is also 100% the reason i watch love is blind it is purely for the academic and educational aspects to apply to my writing and nothing else
Your video flow/ monologue is SO satisfying. Idk if that is the best way to express the feeling I get from listening to you, but I guess it makes sense you are a writer. You hit the nail on the head when writing your “script” for your videos… about writing.
The difference between friendships and relationships is the commitment and exclusivity.
Bro really called Welch's sparkling grape juice "red wine"
Your videos are so goddamn insightful and entertaining at the same time, idk how you do it so consistently. The content alone is enough to make me stay, but then you go and do these engaging visuals (in fucking paint) with fun jokes to boot.
This was super helpful.
I'm writing a romance right now, and avoiding all the stupid tropes is not enough to make me like my own writing. Thank you for sharing.
One of my favorite romances I've written: One party has this incessant need to harm himself and others, which is caused by his PTSD. So, as a healthier alternative to self harm, he fights bad guys. A lot. Other guy doesn't enjoy fighting that much, but has lost someone due to not being strong enough, and to make sure that doesn't happen again, he also starts fighting. A lot.
Then they bump into each other, try to kill the other party, fail, realize the other one is really good, reconcile and decide to fight more often. Which somehow develops into a relationship based mostly on consentual ass-whooping. And they're surprisingly healthy!
I know they aren't very realistic and they're not meant to be. Writing their interactions is extremely fun, as they can go from wiping the floor with the other's face to cuddling and reading books together. And writing fun dynamics is my favorite thing.
A more toxic one of my relationships consists of a guy who literally and figuratively breaks his back for a girl that gave his, previously pointless life, meaning. Except she doesn't see it that way and just treats him like a co-worker while the other treats her like a goddess (she's actually a war criminal lol). Then there's the girl that escaped from a cult and tries to live a more normal life, and the hippy peaceful mountaineer who tries to explain to her that sacrificing infants is, in fact, bad. Thought that last one is not really romantic? I dunno, all I know is they're fun to write :P
Sorry for any mistakes, English isn't my 1st language
“All of the booty has been plundered” is my new favorite quote
I was just stuck on writing a romance between two leads and you made this video. Please stop looking into my inner thoughts, but thanks for the video!
Is that Welch's sparkling grape juice? If so, nice.
bro's narrative craft is so compelling, even his stick figure sketches leave an impression on me
That Spy Kids 3 reference was top tier!!! It’s blink and you miss it at 1:23
I don't know how you break down complex dynamics into such clear, concise points... but you do. Props to you, sir.
Dude this is fucking PERFECT for what I’m writing at the moment. Thanks a ton
Can’t believe I didn’t mention the sailing fit is top notch, looking stunning. Killer shades, matching mic + shirt + shorts… go get em
I just can't get over how good this is. Literally zero bullshit. You only convey what is necessary and you do it efficiently while still being entertaining. You even have a good visual aid, unlike most writing youtubers who just talk at a camera.
Again: Zero. Bullshit.
3:00 Not the dog waggin they tail ☠☠☠
So sorry to hear about your plundered booty, hope you recover from this tragic loss
Love this. Currently writing a low fantasy novel with romance so this was helpful.
Your videos are both educational and validating. It's easy to understand and phrased in a way that makes it clear that this is advice and not a rule written in stone - while not sounding insecure about the validity of your advice either.
I'm not only learning new things, but also evaluating my existing ideas differently. The obsessive romance I've been writing doesn't "just click", but I somewhat accidentally gave them really strong reasons to be together. And now that I know that everything will be revolve around these reasons, I have a second angle to look at my scenes from!
This guys ad transitions are top tier bro
This was entertaining, helpful, and insightful!!! Thanks a bunch and you being on a boat was the highlight of this video lol
I feel like these are always the perfect videos, uploaded at the perfect time, perfectly. Literally some of the most helpful writing advice I've ever heard, every time (and I've gone through a *lot* of unhelpful advice).
The continuity of the wine glass being filled and drank is a cherry on top of the wonderful points in this video. You Inspire me to be a better writer. I would have been good but you inspire greatness with the layering of education and comedy in your works. Keep on your path, and may you inspire others in your future lives like you have inspired myself and others in this one.
Also ditching the glass for the bottle eventually shows character development xD
something that i find really useful about your vids is that you expose the underlying ideas behind writing certain aspects of characters, which i personally find way more helpful than stuff like “well your story needs a 3 act structure and a climax and resolution etc etc” because understanding how to create the characters that drive that story structure and how they work in internally drives me more. like i actually start thinking about WHAT actually happens in a point in a story because im now thinking about the character thats central to the narrative, rather “dang i need to have an inciting incident” and not knowing what to do because im more focused on a plot checklist than the character/theme. Even some stuff you bring up like “characters need something out of a relationship” which i was already aware of on some subconscious level is great to bring up because now im more focused on it, whereas before even though i did address these things somewhat, they were half baked and not tied into the character’s arcs or the overall theme if that makes sense. love your vids!
Geez, you voiced basically everything Ive been thinking about fictional romances in this video. It really gets on my nerves when people throw their characters together “for the vibes” without any thought of how the whole romance is going to actually fit with the characters’ motivations. And honestly it’s so much more satisfying (and emotionally devastating at times) when romantically involved characters have foils with their arcs. Great video, I applaud you
I think one thing about attachment theory is that anxious attachments don't always pursue avoidant. In my experience it's been the other way around. I think it's more that anxious and avoidant both want the other to validate them.
Why are Romeo and Juliet attracted to each other? After going over it a few times in my head, there isn't realy a reason. Each half of the couple even has other people they could be paired with, but it's never shown or explained why they simply have to be together and not with anyone else. They each wax poetical about how the other is just so irresistible, Romeo in partiuclar making a comically awkward metaphor appropriate to his lovesick teenage character about how Juliet's eyes shine brighter than the sun and you just get this image of a human floodlight as though Juliet were cyclops from _Xmen,_ but all this serves is to highlight how nothing about this attraction is rooted in a definable need that the other fulfills. "She's just prettier than the other girls," isn't a need.
The only reasons actually given by the story and any of the characters explictly are,
-- Destiny
-- Spontaneous romantic chemistry
-- The thematic allusion to the two houses: Romeo and Juliet love each other because their houses hate each other
You will notice that none of these offer a conrete motive and may as well be tautological: They love each other because they love each other. Determinism is the antithesis of motivation, spontaneity likewise, and finally no particular reason is given for why Montague and Capulet are in a feud. The conflict is already in progress when the play begins.
The play is quite aware of this and seems to find a certain mystery and purity in it. The imag eof love at play is not that Romeo and Juliet are somehow deeply special but the opposite in that when a romance happens in any case, when two people are compelled to be together, it is the will of God. The ritual of marriage is supposed to reflect this. According to our values, this is how every relationship would be. But society is not particularly wary of what it wishes for.
In any event, divorce is so common these days that this image isn't very credible. And indeed, other cricumstances bring the relationship to a disaster. The kind of relationship Romeo and Juliet represent is just as dead in our public consciousness as the characters are by the end of the play. (Romeo racking up quite a kill count in collateral on his way to the grave.) Which leads me to consider whether or not the ideal of totally absorbed eternal infatuation with another person was not a product of marriage as an institution rather than the other way around.
We need reasons for people to be in love now because we've had such a buffet of sour grapes where the lovers have ulterior motives or just don't get along; where this fantasy is destroyed; psycho analysis being the fruit of wisdom we get as compensation for our fall from grace.
Part of the point of the play is just that such a love is too good for this earth in line with the christian ideal of spirt being the real thing over matter:
"And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for. thee that one of thy members should perish, and. not that thy whole body should be cast into hell." -- Matt 5:29
Romeo and Juliet are the fantasy while Montague and Capulet represent the social and political menutia of the real world. Sorry, Shad. There may be some worth to the dream of the perfect marriage, but it is no resolution for despair but rather it's source. If people no longer desired perfect relationships, they would stand better odds of living in the real world.
The main reason people get divorced is because they have wildly excessive expectations. Marriage symbolizes a fantasy but is really entirely pragmatic. You can't get people to do it anymore by making them dream at night about it. Man cannnot live on the word of God alone. He needs bread.
But to get back to writing, we don't need the story to come prepared with a fillibuster justifying why Romeo and Juliet must be together because there are plenty fo interesting dynamics at play without it and that's the real purpose of trying to ground these things in the first place. If anything, the relationship itself is quite insipid. That is the nature of infatuation. Shakespeare doesn't shy away from the spectacle of two dipsticks acting out a tale collective and as old as time as though it were something uniquely personal.
From what I heard Romeo and Juliet was supposed to be a centrical comedy. Their attraction was supposed to be ridiculous and their death at the end was supposed to hammer that point home.
Something that often gets lost in all the adaptations and general understanding is that Romeo is 16 and Juliet is 13. They're dumb horny kids that are feeling something they've never felt before - hormones running wild on their immature brains - and they have no societal framework that explains it aside from overly elaborate poetry. That is why they set everything around them on fire and completely destroyed themselves as well. It's two dumb children acting out because their families are too busy backstabbing each other and don't pay attention to their kids.
I disagree. The way they are paired makes sense for at least Romeo because early in the play its established that Romeo is someone who fixates on people. Im not sure the term for it, but he finds someone and becomes obsessed with them but his interest only lasts for short periods of time. Juliet was just the next girl he was going to try to be with before he got bored and moved on (if he lived long enough to do it lol).
I'll take this as your "Arcane Analysis" video...for now. As always, great insight into writing.
Jesus F. Christ. I feel like I just found the gold without the crap that the other "Writing Consultant" people throw at me just to sell their service/book.
Please don't leave me. Ever.
Thank uou for giving such clear guidance on how to build up stories and characters. So many other pages just focus on the top errors made and don't actually help correct for the issues. Or they give such specific correction that it isn't applicable across the board. Your ability to generalize the guidance and show random examples of how guidelines work across genres is extremely helpful. Your presentation also makes it fun to watch and learn.
16:49 bro described my past relationships
I just love these vids, bro. I like how you ask writers to challenge their characters' beliefs. I still remember the vid about how to make really good dialogue; it really opened my eyes. And it wasn't because of all the small bits that make a good dialogue (subtext, etc.), but because I saw you create it. I would love to see more vids like that. Theory is good and all, but practice is necessary. When starting out, I don't have a reference point, and I would love to see someone with actual experience write something. Anything would do; writing dialogue, writing visual images of scenery, how to set up a fight, etc; It gives us something to compare our work with. So thank you for your work and the time you put into making these videos. Keep up the good work.
Thank you!
I jump with joy every time u mention enneagram in ur videos btw it makes me grin so wide. I love enneagram it’s so GOOD for characters/character writing and it can easily add more depth to a character that was otherwise lacking. Also it just tickles me pink as a writer that’s also got a major special interest in psychology
I’m so glad I came across your videos!!! I’m a writer but I took screenwriting classes in college (by far, the BEST advice I got was from this class compared to other fiction writing classes) and it’s very refreshing to see actual good advice on here.
My favorite TH-cam channel about storytelling talking about how to write romance (my favorite genre to write)???? Sign me up!! 😁👍
this is big for me cause i want to start writing some good relationships but i do not know how people actually talk to each other lmao, this helps for sure
I usually take like 3 times the length of a video because I keep opening my notepad and writing stuff down. Good stuff, man
I love this advice, and specifically because it still leaves room for the Terminally Online Types, so long as they DO BETTER. I enjoy participating in fandoms with huge ensemble casts and I almost always end up shipping characters with almost every other character, because it's possible to identify ways that the cast meets each other's emotional needs in romantic contexts.
Take a character who's an Artsy Type. Passionate, determined, kinda airheaded and bad at social cues. Would they be well-matched with a Practical Type who helps Artsy balance flights of fancy with reality while Practical enjoys the beauty that Artsy brings to their life? What about a Free-Spirit Type who learns discipline and ambition from Artsy, but in turn teaches Artsy how to shake off criticism and move on from life's bullshit? Or maybe a character who looks completely opposite to Artsy, a Science Type, but when they see past their surface-level differences, they realize they share common values, like passion for new discoveries/creations. There's no such thing as a single soul mate for a character because all kinds of characters fulfill all kinds of emotional needs.
It ends up proving the point that if you have an entire cast of characters and no one fulfills anyone's emotional needs, even theoretically, you have a very flat and under-developed cast. Well-developed characters naturally lend themselves to romance because their clear personalities and motivations create unique dynamics in a wide variety of situations.
Hello Sir, mad respect.
You're videos and writing process is a breath of fresh air in the vast and convoluted online world.
The shear insight and charisma is always appreciated by us, and your no-bullshit analysis concept is brilliant.
These videos you produce are compelling and eye opening. I tilt my hat to you
this entire channel for me is 'never before have i been so offended by something i 100% agree with' (as a person giving my drawings something to do) for this, i thank you.
i love these videos because they speak my language to a T. im a blunt, to the point, tough love kind of person and for some reason advice videos on creative writing just don’t get through to me. these videos help me see my writing more impartially and since i’m studying psychology, thinking more logically about my character’s voices and interactions is making them more 3 dimensional. ive looked into enneagram and attachment theory for so long without applying them to my characters so thanks 🤞🏽
Funny how inadvertently created two characters that are the two extremes anxious and avoidance. I didnt knew about this stuff yet it felt akwardly natural for them to get into the other. Is not just the context of a lot of shit going (traumatic experiences, copium mechanism) and both being first "forced" to be together wtih an on going conflict and then feeling "secure" with each other when they start finding tools to work their relationship. Its also how one tries constantly to get the other attention failing at this feeling insecure and confused to then eventually giving up and starting to realize "wait Im fine by myself lol" which pushes the other character to move toward the other when it feels rather than conciously see that she wants her. Now I have to develop this and decide what type of closure I will give to them. But I just really liked how this helped me to have a much more clear structure to work with.
This dropped at EXACTLY. THE RIGHT TIME.
I just started on a dream fanfic abt (the apocolypse, coping with grief and trauma lol) two old who lost everything and now only have each other and have to survive, and i'm figuring out how to write their relationship and the conflicts in it.
The WalkingDead ref caught me off guard because it was also what i needed (though they are each other's only option, it's more like realising their feelings for one another and actually confronting them instead of letting it fester and pushing eachother away and actually coping in a *healthy* way.)
I was on the edge of my seat the whole time, you kept dropping PLATINUM nuggets of new information that I actually needed (some i didn;t even KNOW i needed)
Thank you Local for bringing us romantically struggling writers' problems out into the light and giving us the tools to fix it lol.
Also congrats on the new wine-and-lake-piracy lifestyle!! It's really awesome to see you have success from what you're doing. :DD
Things for me to work torward lol.
The irony is that characters are people, and vice versa. Great analysis this channel keeps getting better and better
Amazing video as always. Concise, well explained, and structured in a way that holds my attention (I have ADHD and I find it difficult to follow content generally). This being said, in case you come across this comment, a question that bugs me most of the time while I'm writing/thinking about ideas etc. is, how do you get from A. (idea, character, world) to B. (an actual story) the fastest? When I use a solid structure I get into analysis paralysis, while by not using one I end up writing stuff that goes nowhere. Thank you!
This is such a brilliant channel to learn storytelling from!
18:55 this is the most chaotic single image I've ever seen
Watching this has actually made me feel a lot more confident in one of the relationships I've been writing. A quick check of my notes confirmed that both characters get something from the other, and while they definitely aren't perfect to start, their respective strengths and weaknesses... kinda balance each other out. I have no clue how I stumbled into this, but I'm happy I did. This video has also helped expand my framework for writing in new relationships if I ever find that necessary.
Edit: After further thinking, I've even realized the pairing is Anxious/Avoidant, and I don't even have to change their existing backstories for facilitate a clash. One's a prince who's mom died when he was little and has a very strict dad. He hasn't gotten nearly as much love as he's needed, and the other is a Princess of a destroyed kingdom who never got to know her parents, leading her to feel closed off and outside of the real world, so human connection is somewhat alien and unnerving for her.
ikr? I was checking my pairing as well and sighed with relief
As a person on aroace spectrum, your comment about romance being strutrually similar to friendship is very interesting. It it also important to note that romantic and sexual attraction can exist independently. Some people can be involved in romance without sex, others the other way around. All those types of relationship can be healthy. They also add diversity to the story
The way the level of his wine glass changes drastically through the video xD
giving a screenplay writer a sponsor is such a good strat this guy gives way more convincing pitches for the product than most other youtubers
Never have I felt so thoroughly described as when he talked about anxious attachment 😭
this video actually highlight that characters and people really are not that different. the only real difference is that one is real and the other is fiction.
I really love this framework on character relationships, this is not the first time I've known about them too. It's not that it's a given rule, but rather it reflects on real life relationships since we do want to love the person we need(arranged relationships tend to be at risk of dispute). If we had character A and character B be in a relationship where both are independent from one another, it would make their relationship dull, and could also be used as framework for a story where both characters face a falling relationship due to their lack of connection.
A good example of a great character relationship would be Marcelline and Princess bubblegum. They don't necessarily require each other to function, they can live their lives with ease but they have visible deficiencies without each other. When they had finally reconnected and started dating again we can see from the episode Obsidian that they are living more healthy lives together, they aren't co-dependent they are complementary.
And I'd also like to mention Amphibia since i just finished the series. We have three characters in an unhealthy friendship Anne, Sasha and Marcy. Marcy is the clumsy nerd and Anne is the dumb one in the team, that's where Sasha siezes the role as their protector and leader with a control complex. Anne lacks sesne of self and she's constantly pushed around, Sasha is obsessed with having control and Marcy can't keep herself together if she's isolated. They are very co-dependent of each other that when they begin to change they are conflicted with one another. To fix their crippling friendship they have to overcome challenges and learn to accept that everything will change in the grand scheme of time. They were so caught up in the fantasy where they could keep doing things as they were. Unhealthy relationships are very compelling because there is alot of room for improvement.
Western media isn't very favoured as I've seen, but i love to dig out stories that stretch for hours, so nothing's better than watching a cartoon series similar to Adventure time. I could go on for hours talking about it lmao.
Love Adventure Time, fav cartoon
@@localscriptman ikr, I've been longing for similar stories because I couldn't get enough of it
6:54 The real reason he’s shooting this on a boat. 😅
I've been listening to your videos while I clean, and I just happened to look up and noticed you were on a boat with your feet blurred 🤣🤣 Freaking brilliant. Thank you for all your hard work trying to help others! And the laughs 😸
Always a good day when Local posts.
i absolutely love the framing in your videos man. the unhealthy relationships segment where its just a speck of you on the field is my favourite. also your art style gradually gets better, the mouths on the characters is one sign of that. i hope you keep being this wonky and whimsical as your channel grows.
I appreciate the feet blurring, also you could sum up all your videos in one word "causality"😂, keep up the good work, probably one of my favorite writing channels.
You cited Heidi Priebe !!!!!!!!!! I love this channel even more !
This is a very good video about writing relationships in fiction! Thanks for this!! Best wishes from Reykjavik, Iceland.
I think I’ve found one of the best writing channels
i thought this video was rather helpful, and i wanted to share some thoughts!
about the reflection on the purpose of healthy relationships, i wanted to add something. rather than being applicable to supporting characters, i also like to mention the possibility of the relationship itself being a backdrop (although this is a slight genre swap from the discussion proper). the kinds of relationships that don't contain particular development or thematic relevance, and only exist as the bond between two self-sufficient characters, are really good to add some levity or emotional value to an actual, proper plot that doesn't have anything to do with the romance. so instead of crystal and her friend fighting monsters, we can have crystal and her girlfriend fighting monsters. many people prefer it this way, although i must warn that this relationship type is the exact opposite of a slow-burn, and does not fit onto a slow-burn framework. slow-burn romances with little to no development or thematic relevance tend to just be exercises in wasting time. (this isn't to say your main plot slow burn relationship can't start quickly, slow-burn is when a relationship is developed over the course of an entire story, waiting a million years for a relationship to start is just called baiting and i'd advise against it in most cases.)
a second point on the section about the distinction between relationships and friendships, i'd like to say that even in real life, i'm of the opinion that relationships and friendships are not very distinct. i think this because i have a somewhat unique perspective as a hyperromantic polyamorous person, and so my "friend" attraction and my "partner" attraction tend to be one and the same. although i feel i must state that even if you're not like me, i still think a romantic relationship that resembles anything close to health *should* be first and foremost a strong friendship. my spouse is, sure, the person i sleep with and smooch on the face, but primarily they are my best friend. and i think this dynamic is enlightening, because, as you said, writing friendships is also aided through usage of your model. an interesting and healthy friendship that gets any time or development *should* be made of those moving parts with mutual needs and wants and themes.
and lastly, i'd like to have a talk about something. this model seems to only really be applicable to people who are drawn to each other, either as friends or as partners. can any of this advice be applied to the "relationship" between two opposed characters? and i think the bit about the relationship characters fighting or experiencing a rough patch might be enlightening here, but i'm having trouble thinking of what. and also, this model is at least mostly predecated on mutual needs and wants, right? it's hard for me to think of a situation in which two diametrically opposed characters are looking to fulfill a need with one another, aside from me "stop destroying the planet/let me destroy the planet you asshole". so, maybe this model in its entirety is only useful for aligned relationships between characters, but i was curious if anyone had any thoughts on how this principle could be used to help create interesting and dynamic antagonistic relationships.
thanks for reading! have a good one.
I'm sorry but your blurring your feet out of the video is perfect 😂 it's so funny 😭