Any help you can give to this video's visibility would be much appreciated, I'd love this to reach as many people on the spectrum as possible And please by all means, do feel free to (respectfully) pull me up on any mistakes I may have made Hope this video does somethin' for ya :)
Thanks for this man. I’m going through first responder training right now and one of our assignments is on how we can help people with autism in our community. This video has been very insightful and helpful.
Just starting the video now, the first video was so incredibly helpful for me in understanding my autism. The story about your work experience was more helpful to me than almost any video I've watched on TH-cam before. Thank you for what you do Fudj, you're one of the most inspirational channels on this site to me
I'll do my best to share this video. I'm working on a charity event in Norwich to do with Autism in Norfolk with a company who have a gaming convention coming soon. Hopefully once we've secured a date some money can be raised and people can be helped.
I didn't say this in the last video but I meant to: You saying that bit of "If scientists and professionals don't fully understand [autism], how can I expect [my family] to understand" is one of the most mature and empathetic things I have ever heard on the internet. Thank you.
The segment about the overlap between trans/nonbinary people and people on the autism spectrum hit home really hard. I think you handled it great and as someone who is autistic and nonbinary, I've always had this thing where I would feel comfortable telling someone I was autistic, or nonbinary, but never both. I'd feel like in their head if I said I was nonbinary, and then said I was autistic, it would discredit my identity. Your explanation of how introspective people on the spectrum were, and how that can more easily lead to discoveries about gender or sexuality makes a lot of sense and does help me feel a lot better about that topic. Thank you for these videos, they're really important for a lot of people
idk whats wrong with me but seeing non trans or political youtubers being able to talk well about trans issues genuinely makes me tear up from happiness.
The angle I approach gender and sexuality from is less introspective and more analytical. I don’t identify as a man because I’ve never heard a convincing case for what that even means (I think that makes me non-binary without being trans?). I think the whole system of identifiers is fundamentally flawed. Like, take the concept of attraction. “Hetero-” and “homosexuality”, even ignoring the problems with inclusivity, imply that the traits of people you are attracted to are somehow related to the traits that you have. You can’t be “attracted to women”, there’s not word for that. You’re straight, or a lesbian, or something that competing pride groups have likely made up multiple different names for in order to accommodate NBs or something similarly overlooked. What does “being a man” have to do with who or what I’m attracted to? I’m not pan or bi, there’s not a remotely even distribution of gender in the people I find attractive- but at the same time I don’t discount gay attraction just because that very pretty person happens to be a boy. If the traits I’m attracted to aren’t cleanly attached to gender, why on earth would I expect anything else to cleanly fit into the gender system people have prescribed to me? I’m pretty closeted just for the sake of convenience; explaining why I shave my body hair or wear a skirt or lurk around the women’s clothing at the department store if I’m a man isn’t something I’m prepared to deal with, and I either don’t feel strongly enough about or can’t keep up with the maintenance of many gendered things anyway. In the end, though, it makes sense that many autistic people are trans or nonbinary from the opposite end of things, too. Autistic people not only introspect a great deal, they analyze the world around them extensively and thoroughly in order to keep pace with the type of nonsense neurotypical people invent. It’s like finding out that autistic people are much more likely to state that they don’t identify as cat people or dog people, or don’t believe in astrology. The only difference between being an Aries and being a boy is that I wasn’t raised in a world that forces you to use a different bathroom if you were born in April than if you were born in September.
I have no idea if I'm autistic but I relate to this a shit ton. Here is my cool gamer advice: for tasks that most people can do but you can't, just accept that it's harder for you to do, but it won't be impossible to learn. Break down tasks like tieing your shoes to a science. Make as clear of a picture possible on how to tie shoes. A lot of those tasks will also be met with shame, shame of not being able to do them, understand that shame is a roadblock and wont help you get the task done. Shame is there for a reason, it's part of masking, it's why you're able to blend in. But you have to ignore it when trying to do tasks. But yeah just thought I'd give that a shot shrug emoji
Another fantastic video! I will leave a comment for the algorithm. As an autistic person who was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome as a child at the age of 10 (2010), I wouId watch other kids in the playground and wonder why I felt so different and alienated. I felt so enlightened when I found out why! However, despite my parent's best efforts to understand, they would use 'Asperger's' to humiliate me whenever I did something wrong. They would threaten to move me into special ed in high school (where I live, there is only 'Primary school and 'High School', no 'Middle School'). Because of this, I spent a lot of effort in my teenage years trying to be more "normal". This was probably the biggest mistake of my life. Despite this, I like my life right now, I am lucky enough to have a job I like, and feel mostly happy. The fact that most Autistic people can't say the same, however, is an absolute tragedy, and I sincerely hope that the world becomes more kind to us in coming years. Content like this will help tremendously. Your previous video got over 100k views, after all, which is a lot in the context of autism. With all of the people who got diagnosed because of these videos, (think about how many did, but didn't comment as well) you could contribute a lot to creating a better world for us. Keep up the good work, and I wish you good luck in your life!
Man, my therapist gave me the "I never would have guessed" line. The "Hey thanks, it's the trauma and 20 years of forcefully faking it" response is me in a nutshell.
I have yet to watch the video but I really fucking appreciate you talking about this stuff as I've had to live with autism my entire life, your last video on this felt incredibly validating.
idk if this was intentional but at 42:27 “yeah. that’s me. i have flaws” perfectly timed with just unforcedly waltzing off the edge of the map is hilarious
I watched and left a comment on your last video, and I'm glad I took the time to watch this one too. It's nice to see someone talk about how their experience is so similar, and so different from mine. I've been especially introspective since the last video and I've discovered some positive new things (like that I'm non-binary) and a lot of negative ones (like how I generally feel I have a lack of creativity and how I definitely have misophonia, which is not compatible with having a league of legends player as your roommate). This introspection has gone so far as to make me question whether I'm even autistic, and hearing you talk about how it's so common for autistic people to do such a thing is reassuring. I've gone to college now and after watching this, I feel a serious urge to suddenly shift my focus into something more creative instead of standardized into the future to potentially tap into myself a lot better, because I don't know if I can survive a 9-5 job where all I do is program random stuff that I don't care about. Maybe it'll go well, who knows, but for now, I'll try and find a path I can comfortably go down to take advantage of my interests in the best way possible. Sorry if this was a bit rant-y, I just have a lot on my mind after watching this video, and I mean that in the best possible way because I love thinking about random stuff like this for nearly no reason, so thanks for giving me another reason to do so. Love the vids, keep them up
It is so comforting coming to this comment section to discover that it is full of people with similar circumstances to me. I was diagnosed with Asperger’s at the age of 3 (which may be the earliest here, surprisingly to me!) and in my school life I have hung out with so many different types of people to find truly great people to call my closest friends. It took 5 years, but I finally have a close circle, with equally understanding and funny friends who always make an attempt to make time for me. Coincidentally, the day this was uploaded, I discovered that another guy I know and respect has ADHD. I was so surprised, since he is a very well composed young man. He just struggles with concentration, which would’ve been very difficult for me to notice at all. He is the 4th person who I regularly talk to in my life who I know has ADHD, but I’ve only ever known 1 person with Asperger’s, who I don’t speak to anymore.
Great video good sir! I'm also on the spectrum (was diagnosed really early, at the age of 7 and I'm now 22), and it's always interesting to hear about other people's experiences with it. As you said, we're all so different, but that's also what makes us beautiful. Without my autistic characteristics I simply wouldn't be me
Commenting for the algorithm, but also because I heavily appreciate these videos that you make. Being autistic myself (just diagnosed last year at 22) I found that I had already come to a lot of these conclusions that you presented through this video, but it's still incredibly gratifying just to hear someone else speak them aloud. Especially the section where you talk about gender identity in relation to autism, this is something that I've always felt but have never been able to put into proper words before. And man, that part where you said you have a drive that you don't know what to with? I FELT that shit. Great work as always, and seriously - thank you for talking about this stuff, despite the fact that not everyone wants to listen.
Ever since that video I've been on a path of recognising that I might be on the spectrum. prior to the video I had never even considered it, The concept hadn't even come across my mind let alone had it ever been brought up to me growing up. I was 21 at the time, watching the video really opened my eyes when it came to pulling some parallels of the experiences you were talking about. I mulled over it for a good while before having a pretty dreadful prolonged experience at a work I was at the time. I brought it up to a good friend online as it was stressing me out a good deal. It was surprising to me, but they assumed I had it and yet not even that much later someone at my workplace pointed out that I was showing Autistic tendencies. I ended up having an absolutely awful day with anxiety peaking to a level I hadn't experienced before, It was shit that seams stupid and irrelevant in hindsight but my brain just managed all of it completely wrong. The toxic work environment combined with everything else prior lead to me talking to my parents about it, and then trying to get help, or at the very least a diagnosis. I made the call to my NHS based GP explaining all my issues and shit as best I could, I don't remember much of the conversation but was told I would be receiving another call from someone else who would help me. A couple weeks after I get this new lady who I then have to explain again, and after all that I find that she's an anxiety therapist.. Clearly this was a major part of what was gong on but the anxiety didn't feel like the core issue. I did try to persist but i ended up moving job and to an apartment, add the fact that I realised it wasn't going to be exactly easy ended up demoralising me considerably. I ended up cancelling my appointments as they felt worthless and weren't working with my schedule. Fast forward like 2/3 months to now and I've kinda just left it, I'm way to busy and at least for the time being my mental state is considerably better at this new job. Let's see how long that lasts. Either way thank you man, odds are I would've been a lot older before I even considered it. your video helped me a lot.
For years, I've sort of suspected that I had Autism, but my mother would always shoot down the idea when I'd bring it up. In her mind I think, Autism just looked like my cousin, who is closer to the High-Support Needs end of the spectrum. About eight months ago though, I started seeing a therapist for my anxiety and OCD, and she suggested that a lot of my anxiety could come from Autism. I finally decided to see a specialist to get assessed for it this year, and I got my diagnosis a few days ago. I've told a few family members about it, but I'm waiting for the paper work to come in the mail before telling my mom, cuz I know she's going to argue with me about it and say the psychologist is wrong. Meanwhile, I'm just so happy to finally know for sure. I just wish I'd known earlier.
Thank you so much for making the previous video and this one. You likely already got this by a lot of people, but simply discussing what autism is, how it is perceived by all kinds of people (including those on the spectrum), and your own experiences helped validate the experiences I've been through. Similar to how you described your experiences, I admit that I also occasionally would have instances of intrusive thoughts. It takes so much energy just to keep up, or I guess "mask", my habits, yet I also tend to compare myself to others and start to think, "These people can just naturally do these tasks with no problem, but I need to use so much energy just to focus". Sometimes I wonder if I am forever fated to play the game of catch-up, finally reach a 'checkpoint', only to look back up and see that I still have yet to bridge the gap... If that makes any sense. I feel that no matter how much effort I put into developing myself, there is this disconnect between me and my peers, or just the people around me. There is something that I feel I inherently miss or lack that others naturally do, but I can never get it. You could probably guess this is a major source of insecurity haha. Thankfully I have since worked on this, and your videos are a breath of fresh air. I gained a new perspective on the experiences/circumstances of my life from my condition. I accept it as something that is a part of me, both the "good and bad" of it. I hope by becoming a scientist myself, I could help in doing research to allow both ourselves and the world understand this neurological condition better, because by understanding something, do we fear and hate it less.
Thank you for another insightful video on the topic Fudj! I posted a wall of text comment on the last video, and for this video, it will probably be no different. These autism videos of yours just make me think a lot I guess! I'm not autistic myself, but for 13 years there have been a paper somewhere that says otherwise. I was diagnosed at 15 years of age after being bullied for a couple of years. I was an over-analyzing, socially untrained kid living in a foster family. I guess you could say that I had the thinking of an adult but the social skills of a small child. Add the whole "not living with your real parents" thing and you have the recipe of being singled out as a weird 15 year old. At this point, I was diagnosed and most people said that I shouldn't feel sad or that anything has changed. They will still treat me the same and the only change is that I now know about this limitation of mine and can work around it. Note that I call it limitation. This is because I didn't have anything in particular I was interested in or good at by the time I was diagnosed. So it felt like I had the hardships without the autistic superpowers everyone was talking about. This made me feel even more lonely and odd in the negative way. Of course many of the people close to me who had promised not to treat me differently started doing so. Some of them seemed to read the general description of autism and faced me with that in mind rather than who they have learned that I am from experience. This still held true even later on when I discovered step by step that this diagnose doesn't apply to me. They see me as a diagnose instead of a person. But let's move on to what I said about being wrongly diagnosed. When I went on to the next school tier (ages 16-19), that environment was a lot less hostile and I making friends was a lot easier. I developed social skills that I didn't know i was capable of and "the weird sides" of me weren't seen as problems anymore. It was the reboot I needed to discover that I was just the amount of "weird" I should be. But even though I learned that it wasn't actually autism, I still feel a strong bond with the autistic community and also that I share some traits commonly associated with it. For example, I'm a deep and sometimes unconventional thinker who prepares loads of counter-arguements to everything I say just because I'm used to being questioned and feeling this need to always prove myself. Also, I become passionate about everything I do, and if I don't, I probably won't do it for very long. I guess it's similar to what you said about obsessing. Long story short. I'm glad I had to go through all of this without being autistic. It has been such a blessing to get so entwined in this community and learn about it from the inside. I feel like I might have a false membership at this point, but I hope that doesn't rub people the wrong way. I will always stand up for the community, teach people about autism if necessary and give the support I can. After all, I have this community to thank for who I am today!
Thank you for pointing out the staring problem! I'm gonna talk to my doctor and see if I may have autism, because what you've said in these 2 videos are relatable to me, so thank you so much!
as an AMAB Trans Person I was diagnosed quite early on in my life, so early I never really knew what it meant to have Autism and no one felt to the need to explain it, so I wanna thank you for this and your previous video despite its flaws.
This was a great follow-up video to the first one! In both videos I felt like you discussed the topic and your thoughts on it very well, and I for one have learned a lot about autism from both of these videos. I especially liked the section on the perceptions of autism, it really opened my eyes to how differently people are affected by it.
When the first video came out, I couldn't find any content which I could relate to my experience of being on the spectrum. But your video seriously helped me so much. Just hearing about someone else's experience, made me feel less alone thank you.
Those high/low support needs are called ASD levels. ASD Level 1 - Level 1 ASD is currently the lowest classification. Those on this level will require some support to help with issues like inhibited social interaction and lack of organization and planning skills. ASD Level 2 - In the mid-range of ASD is Level 2. In this level, individuals require substantial support and have problems that are more readily obvious to others. These issues may be trouble with verbal communication, having very restricted interests, and exhibiting frequent, repetitive behaviors. ASD Level 3 - On the most severe end of the spectrum is Level 3 which requires very substantial support. Signs associated with both Level 1 and Level 2 are still present but are far more severe and accompanied by other complications as well. Individuals at this level will have limited ability to communicate and interact socially with others.
It’s a shame that being considered “well-adjusted” means fitting into a neurotypical role; it’s so frustrating and hurts and is just so dumb to have to deal with.. and agh, I dunno, I’m also autistic, and managed to fail that bc “my parents didn’t remember enough autistic criteria” even though I experience sensory overload, incredibly strict routine, an inability to do more than one thing at a time, and many other things.. but, I failed, and, thankfully I have parents who are incredibly understanding (and are both on the spectrum) but.. god; it’s just so scary to be in this world I’m sorry haha, your video really has hit very hard for me, I’m very thankful there’s someone on here who’s able to talk about it, and be a good influence, eheh.. sorry aa
Thank you for your videos. I have friends on the autism spectrum and you have really helped to give me a better perspective on it. I hope things stabilize for you financially, but I am very happy to maybe see some of your amazing content again! Take care of yourself dude
I guess I should really consider myself lucky to have been diagnosed around 5th grade, I didn't know that it that much of a commin issue to be diagnosed late
Not only am I on the spectrum, I'm a hyper affectionate extrovert. If that sounds like it doesn't work... Yeah. It's rough. I'd like to share one of most important things I've learned. I love data. I want as much as I can get my sticky hands on. Not only do most people find it intrusive, but it made it hard for me to apologize. Apparently, people take details as making excuses. Keep is short and sweet. Go figure.
After watching your first video I got thinking about it and ended up asking my therapist if I might have autism. She pointed out the overlap with ADHD which I am diagnosed with, then moved so we never really chased it down. A lot of my family is on the spectrum so it made some sense but I still really have no idea about myself. Currently I suspect it just a more liquid thing, like ADHD and autism are in the same pool and i'm just more on the ADHD side. Anyway I really admire how you're using your platform to spread awareness about autism and donkey kong (separately i'm not calling donkey autistic)
Another good video! For sure your words have opened up quite a few things to consider. I also think though that as much as people put money into sanctions that can benefit people with Autism or change others perceptions that of Autism (or anything else for that matter); we can only affect our behaviors towards others. It’s a broad statement, no doubt, not everyone is as bright as you Fudj and aren’t willing to correct themselves. Hell, I have that problem too. The main takeaway for me personally is to just… try. Try to do better no matter what. Focus on yourself and your outlook to inadvertently influence others in a positive manner. Thanks for the video, even if you don’t think you deserve the admiration, I still want to tell you that because I want to give my gratitude!
This is a great video, thanks for making it. I really appreciate an opportunity to learn more about my condition, especially in a form thats as engaging and well made as this
It was your streams that gave me the idea, that I could be autistic. And this video makes me more and more believe that it's true. Though it has been months ago since I first suspected I might have adhd. Luckily for me I need definetly low support.
Thank you for this! I love all your content, and videos like these helps my ignorance on the topic, due to my brother being undiagnosed at 30, in both videos I feel your points have helped me understand him more. I hope you are able to make a living from doing this and continue for as long as you can:)
wonderful video my Fudjiness. really respect the way you have actively engaged in the conversation on this topic by addressing your previous video, and especially the quick aside. you are doing a great job my friend x
Why do shoelaces even exist? What ever happened to those velcro shoes? (I got more out of this video than this but idk how to articulate it so this is my comment. Anytime I try to think of an actual smart comment I feel like I am wording it wrong or something so yeah.)
Haven't finished the video, but hawt damn do I recognise the whole thing with observing people. Thankfully my friends have told me that they actually like me a lot for it, because their get to learn about themselves ^_^ (I also am highly certain they are on the spectrum as well though, so I guess it makes more sense?) And I am Autistic yes. I can feel a bit annoyed if neurotypical people say they also do that thing that I mentioned I do. Like... It's not really the same, but also, pretty much everyone has Autistic traits. Now that I think about it, am I the only one that doesn't get better because I get told other people have the same problems as me? (Like, from professional people, that also deal with people on the spectrum)
thank you for stepping up for trans people in that "aside" - that really made me smile and feel cared for and understood :) i'm non-binary (and suspected autistic but not dx'd) and i think you are absolutely spot on in your analysis. in addition to the extra introspection and self-critique we have to do greatly increasing the likelihood for us to end up examining our relationship to the gender spectrum, for me it also has to do with gender being a *social* construct and the way that most neurotypical social rules seem arbitrary and nonsensical anyway. like gender is just another one of those strange NT social dynamics in my eyes, and i will not follow rules that don't make sense to me lol.
One of my favorite little anecdotes was a tumblr post talking about how people say that autism is getting more and more common. In essence, the post said "the condition isnt getting more common, the world is just more hostile towards autistic people, so its more noticeable. Back in 15th century england, nobody was called autistic, but there was the strange little son of the blacksmith who doesn't really talk to anyone but is really good at churning butter." I dont know why i love it but its just so simple but it works so well
That's interesting, because I would have said that the world is becoming more and more accommodating of neurodivergent people. Certainly awareness of those conditions is more of a public topic than it's ever been before. Maybe I'd argue that stigmatization of spectrum disordered individuals reached a peak sometime in the 20th century (when stigmatization of basically anything other than straight, white, male, and neutrotypical was an all time high) and we've been trying to come down from that ever since. At least in recent times, though, I would attribute the increasing levels of autism to better testing and an expansion of the definition of what behaviors spectrum disorders include.
I am not disagreeing, nor agreeing Autism is getting more and more common, that's a fact. That does not necessarily mean that there are more autistic people. There are generally 3 reasons that there are more 'autistic' people: 1. People just did not know about autism. 2. It could be genetics 3. There are more people getting tested / the characteristics/qualifications are changed (a ''checklist'')
@@tristanneal9552 the world only has become as accommodating as it is because of how hostile its basic structures are. School and jobs lasting 8 or so hours a day and requiring you to sit still and focus on one task, large cities with tons of sounds and people that cause sensory issues, a lot of social interaction being necessary to make a living for yourself, etc. If the world wasn't in the state that it is, neurodivergent people wouldnt need as many exceptions.
These videos are kind of magical. In a world that is often so dismissive, even by professionals on the topic, hearing someone be open and positive about the spectrum is such a breath of fresh air and those are often things that get ignored.
"Autistic people tend to have a habit of always thinking they're right" To the contrary, I have a habit of always thinking I did or am doing something wrong.
I’ve known I was autistic since I was a young child, and it’s only now in adulthood that I’ve really started to come to terms with what that means. When you’re diagnosed at that age in America, you’re isolated from your peers in the name of “teaching you social skills”… which we would have learned regardless by interacting with other kids our age. I was told my autism was something that could be ‘overcome’, something you ‘grow out of’. In order to escape their Special Ed program I had to prove I could mask my autistic traits well enough to go to high school alone. It’s only now that I’ve been free of that awful system for so many years that I understand what Autism really is and how differently it affects those who have it. Autistics are expressive; we are creative; we are passionate; we are introspective. We love what we love so much. You’re right on the money about introspection: I firmly believe that’s the reason there’s such a large intersectionality between Autistic and Transgender people.
I'm from France and... I kinda had that as well. I had to fight my heart out to have the right to be treated like the other kids and avoid the constant bullying and setbacks put into me. However, when I got out of school, I basically wasn't me anymore, I could "pass", sure, but I'd just come-off as a "lesser" person. More lazy, selfish and/or stupid by default and so, it's even more of an uphill battle especially when you're tricked into feeling imposter syndrome for your own autism by our society. And when you finally accept yourself, you finally allow yourself to live more, even if you've forgot how that works, and you finally open-up on deep things about you that most people wouldn't. It's amazing, in a way, to introspect that much, but it's also a shame that it's done in such a way because building your own identity as an autistic person is so much more harder I feel like and it's also why I feel like there's such an intersectionality between the two.
Never in my life has a video so succinctly identified my struggles with being autistic. I can relate to almost everything you said on a personal level, especially the bit about TH-cam being the only job you *can do*, how working is so mentally and emotionally draining that whilst having to pretend to be neurotypical, you begin lementing how sad and meaningless it feels to be stifled by the conditions and how you fear the possibility of that being what you do the rest of your life. I've worked 3 jobs, 2 in food service, and one job as a general laborer at a warehouse. The longest I've worked was 8 months, and for 3 years now I've been unemployed and essentially trapped at home, where the only value I can provide to my family is basic chores and emotional support. I constantly feel useless because of my inability to work, and I had a friend recently give up on me because he thought I was using my autism as an excuse to not work. Of course, money problems are a constant problem for me as well. If I can't do TH-cam, what CAN I do? It feels like the only chance I have to be happy, but getting the money for a computer, editing software, and all the other things that I have no experience with is a brick wall between me and some semblance of self fulfillment. I just want to be happy, man. Idk what to do 😔
I can't believe how your comment can hit so close to home for me, even though I haven't gone through everything you have. In that regard, you have my most sincere sympathies. I can't say whether I have autism or not because I feel as though I've had mixed signals given to me in my young adulthood, but I can relate to some of what you've said. There are days where I feel that regardless of how bad of a platform it has become lately, I still feel tempted to make a serious attempt at entertaining others through TH-cam. Both for the sake of being productive and having an income, and for my own personal creative ambitions and desires. Albeit, one of the things holding me back is that lack of proper equipment and software that you've mentioned. And while I wouldn't mind sucking it up and trying to get an offline job (mostly so that I feel like I fit in with the rest of society; if almost everyone else gets to do something, then I want to do it at least once in my life too,) something tells me I'd have a mental breakdown from trying to cope with socializing with so many different people in public and not upset or offend someone with my behavior. It sucks, you know? Damned if you, damned if you don't. Anyway though, that's left me stuck at home for many years too, and I don't really get to contribute much either. Just whatever emotional support I can offer and any house work or yard work I manage to get done. Like you, I feel useless and just want to be happy. Or more specifically, I want to feel like I'm actually living my life, instead of being stuck in this rut. It's driving me crazy. So since I can relate in some way, I guess your comment hit me pretty hard just now. I'm hoping things get better for you; no one deserves to be stuck or miserable like this.
I really hope this video does well. In my experience, most media concerning autism is very... infantilizing? It tends to look down on autistic people (usually kids/teens), either by insulting them or talking about them as though they don't understand basic shit.
I watched your first video on autism before my ASD diagnosis, and this one after it. I don't think it's an exaggeration to say that your first video changed my life; it made me seriously want to try and get a clear answer, after so much confusion and feeling like I didn't belong. It reoriented my career trajectory as well, as after I had this diagnosis, I transferred collages to pursue my true passion - writing music for video games. Making friends here has been hard, but much more doable after knowing myself better. This video was a very good follow-up, and I want to send it to my neurotypical friends for them to learn from. Particularly what you said in this video about trans and non-binary people is true - I am a trans woman, and I am glad that you brought this up, and clarified the real reason behind this correlation. It was very interesting to hear you again on this same topic from a much different point in my life, even after just ten months. I love all your other videos about video games too, so I'm really glad you're continuing youtube. (Also, Undertale is one of my special interests, so I hope you enjoy it.)
Your first video was partially responsible for helping me to realize that I may have ASD. After I got diagnosed with ADHD late last year, my psychologist suggested that she saw in me some symptoms of ASD and let me know that getting tested for it was an option. Eventually I decided to go for it and I was diagnosed. When you talked about how getting diagnosed as an adult sucks, I felt that (though I didn’t really have a bad experience). I’ve naturally just built up habits and mechanisms that make it difficult to detect my autism and so the only way I was able to be diagnosed was by hearing about what I was like as a child. Honestly I still don’t know what to do with this information, especially since I’m very much on the Low Support Needs end of the spectrum. I feel like I can’t tell people about it because it would create a bunch of questions rather than clear anything up. Regardless, thank you for sharing your story. It’s always encouraging to hear from you!
Also, I know you probably know this and I know it sucks, but if you want your videos to do better, you gotta censor yourself a little bit. TH-cam doesn’t like bad words
As someone who is on the spectrum myself, thank you so much for your content and discussing this topic. I have had several similarities to what you've described. When you got into the relationship side of it, it really made me feel less alone. the fear of letting others down, not being enough and being too clingy is very real to me. You've done a great job on research! Hearing you're personal struggles and how you've overcome them, but also admitting that there's still some struggles that you may still have is something I can relate to a lot. I needed to hear this and it really helps. Thank you!
30:26 I’m so glad you brought this up at all. My tendency to obsess about things endlessly is something that I’ve been ashamed to even think about, let alone talk to anyone about. I feel so much less like a wierdo who only ever thinks about/does one thing. It’s something I try to control, and even channeled into improving at drawing/coding, but in the end it’s just linked to who I am.
43:31 Honestly, this weirdly hit home for me. A message I feel like I really needed to hear, after the last couple years being some of the lowest points in my life, which just so happened to be coupled with by far my favorite Monster Hunter village theme, one I've associated for a while now with peace, support, and tranquility. I know I'm just one random dingus in the TH-cam comments section, but sincerely, thank you.
Idk anything about your life, but my last couple of years have been fucking awful so I really vibed with your comment. Hope it gets better for you soon
19:17 Hit hard, I've always struggled with motivation for school even though I've always done extremely well. I always have a sense of dread with me when I'm not there, but I never found anybody who felt the same. After watching this it really clicked for me, that I wasn't the only person experiencing similar feelings and that I'm not trapped, thank you.
Man, you just continue to deliver. Every upload is superb, and the careful consideration you clearly put into this work is something I really respect. The through-line of difference and it’s benefits and challenges was beautiful. I hope this *art* gets you to the point where going viral isn’t a necessity.
Another great video Fudj. I'm not on the autistic myself but you've been a very positive influence in my understanding of what it's like to live with autism and be on the spectrum. I commend you good sir.
I'm not sure if I want the diagnosis anymore. I'm scared of how the state might treat me as a "disabled" person in the future, possibly denying me agency which I already worry about enough as a trans person. I already have the right to support structures by being diagnosed with severe depression. I still have a 100 page or so ASD/ADHD questionnaire sit in my room, including questions for friends and parents. Knowing I'm autistic for myself is enough. It helps me understand myself.
havent finished the video yet, but i watched the first video last night and can relate to many of the frustrations that you were covering. I have ADHD and its the first time i felt understood when it comes to not being able to do things as easy as others and the intense introspection i go through everyday, hearing and seeing how you've been able to get by whiles expressing the creative part of yourself has given me with hope so I thank you.
Haven't watched the video yet but I just wanna say that I'm really grateful for you helping to spread awareness about autism, it really helps make it easier for me to deal with it and I'm glad that you're open about your struggles. Keep up the good work! Edit: Just finished watching and goddamn... You really hit the nail on the head on alot of your points. You made me realise some things ive always noticed but i just couldnt quite understand why they were happening or why i was like that, thank you so much for making these videos
this video really hit home for me who has aspergers. growing up my handwriting was terrible and i flapped my hands,and moved my arms like crazy. i also was terrified of fire drills at school and would get scared to tears cause of it. however, this doesnt have to define me i can still make a huge impact with time, dedication and whatever energy i have. youre channel puts a smile on my face every time i watch your reviews and it helps me whos struggling with self hatred and self doubt. seriously thank you for making the content you do and im excited to see what you can create in the future
I adore videos like this and this one in particular has really gotten me to think about some things. Being neurotypical myself and having a mom who works as an elementary school psychologist, I didn't entirely understand who she worked with on a daily basis, I always saw them as numbers, if that makes any sense. "Oh, my mom has 3 reports due this month, that's 3 people who either are on the spectrum or not," and that kind of stuff, but hearing your story has led me to see the other side and what those 9 or 10 year old's go through every day of their life and many days after. It seemed almost like a doctor diagnosing some form of illness, when it really is much, much more than that. These are people, just like the rest of us, who see the world in a new and interesting light, and they have to treated as such. I hope you continue to make videos like this in the future, along with the normal video essay content you've made in the past!
I have severe dyspraxia and autism I don’t have much problems with my autism as I had my diagnosis at 5. My dyspraxia is so bad it is considered a disability. Many people I talk to think its my autism but I just can’t work in any manual or social settings. I could live off government support but I don’t want to. One day I will find something I both want to do and can do. My mom says there are as many forms of autism as there are autistic people
Well my parents knew i was autistic since i was like born pretty much. But i didnt know until i was around 13. Id say my mental illnesses in general were at there worst during puberty. Which is common for even "normal" people. Because when i turned 18 everything just all of sudden changed and i started acting like a adult and stuff. Like i snapped in a good way. I still have alot of maturing and learning to do but comparing my current life to my oast difference is staggering. It was probably the stress of school. Once i dropped out and got my GED i was way happier.
To add to the depictions of autism in media, it can be really subtle. obviously there is still this binary view of autism, but I think I fall into this band where people might have a suspicion I'm autistic but they probably doubt themselves. I had a pretty close friend in secondary school, talked pretty much every day for 3-4 years. They found out I was autistic when I told them in my last week of school. They themselve have autism as well. It shows that you can't just look at someone and go "oh yeah, they're autistic". I'm very luckly to have gotten such an early diagnosis, I think I was 9 or 10, and I sympathise with anyone who can't get the answers they deserve. btw, I can't tie laces either. I highly recommend elastic laces, turns everything into a slip-on shoe. also, I can't read 24 hour clocks.
Most self-diagnosed people do a _lot_ of research when determining whether they have a something like autism or ADD. I think the image most people get when thinking about self-diagnosis is that of a kid looking at a few memes about autism and concluding that they have autism. But I assure you, they do their research. I recently have been pondering my sexuality, but before concluding whether I'm straight or not, I'm looking into all the different labels and identities. I personally think self-diagnosis is A-OK, as long as you do your research.
Sure, but if you do extensive research with a bias towards a particular outcome, all of that information is going to be filtered in a way that skews it towards your preconceived conclusion. Lack of information is not the problem, the problem is bias and a lack of perspective.
It's not okay. People don't know themselves that well because they only have their own perspective. That's why trained psychiatrist are important for diagnosis
I love that bit at the end about boundaries. It seemed like a nice, loving, but very stern way of letting everyone know that you appreciate them but back the fuck up 🤣. I wish I could catch you live on stream because I would love to see you, the person, unedited and unscripted. Also, I want to thank you for all the times that you give hints to or outright state how bleak things can be with autism when it comes to social interaction. So many people, in my opinion, are ignored because they have genuine issues but are afraid to say what they are feeling because they think what they feel might be overdramatic to other people. So instead, they keep things vague like "I feel bad" or worse, tell the people they talk to that those people are jerks but don't give enough detail as to why they feel that way.
Thank you so much for this video. Although I've never gotten any sort of diagnosis, many of the points in both of these 2 videos really hit home for me. I don't exactly know how to say some of the things I'm going to say, and it'll probably be a bit clunky, so please, bear with me. Ever since I was young, I've always had trouble with social interaction. I really noticed when I got to middle school though. I think part of that was that many of the difficulties and differences that I had shown as a kid were more accepted and excused by society because "he's just a kid." So it took me a little bit to really realize this. I'm not good at introducing myself to people and even then, it's hard for me to grow a deeper connection to people. I think part of it is that I don't know what to say a lot of the time, but I also am worried about saying something that will push people away or make them weirded out. I've always had trouble with trying to have people like me. I'm not sure if it's seeking approval or that I just don't want people to dislike me. I'm not sure what it is. I still struggle with that to this day. People say, not everyone will like you, but I still haven't gotten over that. I would consider the friends that I have to be very weird people that most people wouldn't gravitate towards, but I think I've finally figured out why I've been drawn to these types of people. They're typically more open and less judgy. I really feel like I can say anything around them and they'd be just fine with it. It helps alleviate my fears of alienating people. I really like being around my friends, they make me the happiest that I ever could be, but I have trouble making friends and growing the connection with them. I'm always ready to help my friends with anything, no matter what's going on in my life. I just always feel like I need to help them, even if I may be having difficulties of my own. I always have pushed away my own struggles and worries to help my friends before myself. Part of that might be the fact that I'm extremely empathetic towards other people, but not so much to myself. Many of the feelings I feel when I'm by myself are very neutral and mostly apathetic. But the emotions I end up feeling are usually from other people. It's so strong that I really feel the emotions of others on a screen from a video or movie. Even if I know that it's fake, like fake crying or something, it makes me feel like I'm going to start crying and makes me feel sad, even though I know it's fake. I feel the feelings of others as if they're my own, but mine just aren't really there. Whenever people ask me how I'm doing, I say I'm good, but in reality, I'm not really happy or sad or angry, or anything. Just neutral and apathetic. If I ever try to explain that I feel neutral and that's what's "good," they just don't understand and most don't want to understand besides a little bit of curiosity. People ask me why I haven't been in a relationship yet at 17 and how many women would love to have a guy like me, but I've never really tried or cared enough to go after a relationship with someone. At least not right now. I would love to have one eventually, to have a deeper connection with someone, but I haven't really pursued it. It's like, I would like something deeper, but I don't know how to get to that point, and I don't really end up pursuing them either. Your struggles on working a "normal" job really rings home for me. I used to work at a factory, they had a teenage program there, and just working there for 6 hours 4-5 times a week was one of the most draining things of my life. I never wanted to do anything before work even though I had plenty of time for it because I was hung up about how I need to leave at this time to get to work at this time to do my job and leave at this time. It was in my head most of the day, even on days where I wasn't working. I felt like all of my creative contributions were being drained and that I was just a lifeless worker put through a system that doesn't accommodate my aspirations and talents. From a young age I've always needed to do things a certain way. I always stack my clothes the same way, I always shower the same way, I just go through life the same way. Not exactly planned out or anything, but I need to do things in a certain way or in a certain order to get them done. Whenever something new happens that I didn't expect, it's hard for me to adjust to the new changes and I find myself obsessing over making sure that I'm ready for it to happen, even days ahead of time, and I get ready for things sometimes hours before I need to go to them because I don't want to be late and I've been thinking about it since I knew about it. I always have a problem getting obsessed too. For example, one day, I'll be completely obsessed with playing the piano and becoming really good at it and the next day, I'll completely drop it and be obsessed with drawing and the cycle continues. There are very few things that I've had a continued interest towards in my life. Things that come to mind are certain movies, shows, and video games. I get completely obsessed with those things that I get attached to, but it either is a fleeting interest, or rarely, something that's a continual obsession in something that I can't let go of. People make fun of me for how interested I am in things like Star Wars and superheroes, and it always hurts, even if it's just a joke. I can't help how obsessed I get over these things, and they are things that truly make me happy, but then people will make fun of me for it. It doesn't help that my parents aren't very accommodating either. My adoptive mom has always theorized that I'm on the spectrum, but she never wanted me to get diagnosed because she didn't want me to get labelled and treated differently. Which, I understand why she has that thought process and in a way, I sort of agree with what she's saying. But she seems to think that any of these qualities I have are a liability and that they need to be worked on so that I can get rid of them and be more like "most people." So, it's really frustrating to have these difficulties and to have all the cons that come from them, but I know that I can't really talk about it with her because not only would she not understand, but she would just want me to get rid of them when they're a part of who I am and I can't just change them. I feel like in my life I have no one that would understand these difficulties and so I never talk about them, I just try to push through. These videos have made me realize that this is unhealthy and that having these qualities is perfectly okay and even good in some ways. And that these qualities aren't worse or better, but different and just need to be accommodated for differently. Sorry for how long this is and how personal this is, but these videos really touched my heart and I felt like I had to let these feelings out. So, thank you from the bottom of my heart.
I’m sorry I couldn’t watch the whole video in one sitting, I really wanted to do my part to help you in the algorithm… I don’t think I’m on the spectrum and a lot of the stuff spoken about didn’t really apply to me but I found the video very interesting and appreciate the way you see the world.
I recently talked to a friend about a lot of mental problems I've been having for a while now, mostly from a discussion about how missing medication for depression can really fuck you up. For reference I am not diagnosed with anything nor am I on any sort of medication, but that discussion finally sparked me to try and see someone about these issues. I bring this up because I've been thinking for a long time now that it might also be very possible I'm on the spectrum, and I think this would also be a good chance to start the process of figuring that out too. I can relate to so much of what you've said here and in the previous video, and honestly it something I probably should've looked into a long time ago, but family life makes that somewhat difficult to say the least. I'm not entirely sure what point I want to make by typing this comment out, but I feel a strong urge to at least say something, to say that "Hey, your videos are helping and driving me to seek things out about myself that I should have long ago". So hey, thanks for sharing your stories and giving insight about these things. Hopefully the next time you make a video discussing autism, I'll be able to comment about how things have gone and if I have the answers I want. It might take a long time, but I really think I'm finally starting to get to a point where I understand myself.
As an autistic trans man who has unsupportive family due to them thinking being autistic means I can't be trans, thank you so much for that aside on autistic trans folks like myself. It meant a whole lot to hear that, especially when so many people want to gaslight us into believing that because we're autistic we can't possibly know ourselves when in fact it's the exact opposite. All in all a fantastic video and highly relatable, thank you for making this
This video gives me a lot of feels haha… I’m 22 and have known I have ADHD my whole life, but only really understood it for the past 2 years and had help and treatment for it since october 2021! And ever since covid started, and my understanding of mental health has drastically expanded, I’ve had the question “Have I been autistic all this time, too?” Runs through my head constantly. Quite literally every single day. I’m really scared to bring it up to my family and therapist because of the stigma that it is a developmental disorder and clearly it “didn’t affect me that negatively” so i can’t have it, right? I dunno, I have awesome online friends who listen to me and treat me well, so maybe my confidence will grow and I’ll learn to be assertive enough to ask for help in the future, but to you and everyone else watching who’s somewhere on the autism or ADHD or whatever else spectrums, we all matter and deserve to live in a society that works for us, too ❤️ We’re not worse, we’re not better… just different!
Any help you can give to this video's visibility would be much appreciated, I'd love this to reach as many people on the spectrum as possible
And please by all means, do feel free to (respectfully) pull me up on any mistakes I may have made
Hope this video does somethin' for ya :)
Thanks for this man. I’m going through first responder training right now and one of our assignments is on how we can help people with autism in our community. This video has been very insightful and helpful.
Just starting the video now, the first video was so incredibly helpful for me in understanding my autism. The story about your work experience was more helpful to me than almost any video I've watched on TH-cam before. Thank you for what you do Fudj, you're one of the most inspirational channels on this site to me
Also I'll make sure to send it to my friends on the spectrum if they're interested!
I'll do my best to share this video. I'm working on a charity event in Norwich to do with Autism in Norfolk with a company who have a gaming convention coming soon.
Hopefully once we've secured a date some money can be raised and people can be helped.
it has succeeded, well for me at least.
I didn't say this in the last video but I meant to: You saying that bit of "If scientists and professionals don't fully understand [autism], how can I expect [my family] to understand" is one of the most mature and empathetic things I have ever heard on the internet. Thank you.
it's fair to expect people not to act like assholes imo
The segment about the overlap between trans/nonbinary people and people on the autism spectrum hit home really hard. I think you handled it great and as someone who is autistic and nonbinary, I've always had this thing where I would feel comfortable telling someone I was autistic, or nonbinary, but never both. I'd feel like in their head if I said I was nonbinary, and then said I was autistic, it would discredit my identity. Your explanation of how introspective people on the spectrum were, and how that can more easily lead to discoveries about gender or sexuality makes a lot of sense and does help me feel a lot better about that topic. Thank you for these videos, they're really important for a lot of people
idk whats wrong with me but seeing non trans or political youtubers being able to talk well about trans issues genuinely makes me tear up from happiness.
@Maya if i had to guess, perhaps its validation? They don't HAVE to say it, they don't "need" to say it, but they do, because it matters.
Yo I'm a non-binary autistic as well!
*laughs in borderline*
I will always envy people who feel a cohesive sense of identity
The angle I approach gender and sexuality from is less introspective and more analytical. I don’t identify as a man because I’ve never heard a convincing case for what that even means (I think that makes me non-binary without being trans?). I think the whole system of identifiers is fundamentally flawed.
Like, take the concept of attraction. “Hetero-” and “homosexuality”, even ignoring the problems with inclusivity, imply that the traits of people you are attracted to are somehow related to the traits that you have. You can’t be “attracted to women”, there’s not word for that. You’re straight, or a lesbian, or something that competing pride groups have likely made up multiple different names for in order to accommodate NBs or something similarly overlooked.
What does “being a man” have to do with who or what I’m attracted to? I’m not pan or bi, there’s not a remotely even distribution of gender in the people I find attractive- but at the same time I don’t discount gay attraction just because that very pretty person happens to be a boy.
If the traits I’m attracted to aren’t cleanly attached to gender, why on earth would I expect anything else to cleanly fit into the gender system people have prescribed to me?
I’m pretty closeted just for the sake of convenience; explaining why I shave my body hair or wear a skirt or lurk around the women’s clothing at the department store if I’m a man isn’t something I’m prepared to deal with, and I either don’t feel strongly enough about or can’t keep up with the maintenance of many gendered things anyway.
In the end, though, it makes sense that many autistic people are trans or nonbinary from the opposite end of things, too. Autistic people not only introspect a great deal, they analyze the world around them extensively and thoroughly in order to keep pace with the type of nonsense neurotypical people invent. It’s like finding out that autistic people are much more likely to state that they don’t identify as cat people or dog people, or don’t believe in astrology. The only difference between being an Aries and being a boy is that I wasn’t raised in a world that forces you to use a different bathroom if you were born in April than if you were born in September.
I have no idea if I'm autistic but I relate to this a shit ton. Here is my cool gamer advice: for tasks that most people can do but you can't, just accept that it's harder for you to do, but it won't be impossible to learn. Break down tasks like tieing your shoes to a science. Make as clear of a picture possible on how to tie shoes. A lot of those tasks will also be met with shame, shame of not being able to do them, understand that shame is a roadblock and wont help you get the task done. Shame is there for a reason, it's part of masking, it's why you're able to blend in. But you have to ignore it when trying to do tasks. But yeah just thought I'd give that a shot shrug emoji
Another fantastic video! I will leave a comment for the algorithm. As an autistic person who was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome as a child at the age of 10 (2010), I wouId watch other kids in the playground and wonder why I felt so different and alienated. I felt so enlightened when I found out why! However, despite my parent's best efforts to understand, they would use 'Asperger's' to humiliate me whenever I did something wrong. They would threaten to move me into special ed in high school (where I live, there is only 'Primary school and 'High School', no 'Middle School'). Because of this, I spent a lot of effort in my teenage years trying to be more "normal". This was probably the biggest mistake of my life. Despite this, I like my life right now, I am lucky enough to have a job I like, and feel mostly happy. The fact that most Autistic people can't say the same, however, is an absolute tragedy, and I sincerely hope that the world becomes more kind to us in coming years. Content like this will help tremendously. Your previous video got over 100k views, after all, which is a lot in the context of autism. With all of the people who got diagnosed because of these videos, (think about how many did, but didn't comment as well) you could contribute a lot to creating a better world for us. Keep up the good work, and I wish you good luck in your life!
Man, my therapist gave me the "I never would have guessed" line. The "Hey thanks, it's the trauma and 20 years of forcefully faking it" response is me in a nutshell.
stuff I hate:
animated menu screens in restaurants.
Thats just a reason for me to instantly leave that restaurant.
I have yet to watch the video but I really fucking appreciate you talking about this stuff as I've had to live with autism my entire life, your last video on this felt incredibly validating.
idk if this was intentional but at 42:27 “yeah. that’s me. i have flaws” perfectly timed with just unforcedly waltzing off the edge of the map is hilarious
No it was intentional lool
I watched and left a comment on your last video, and I'm glad I took the time to watch this one too. It's nice to see someone talk about how their experience is so similar, and so different from mine. I've been especially introspective since the last video and I've discovered some positive new things (like that I'm non-binary) and a lot of negative ones (like how I generally feel I have a lack of creativity and how I definitely have misophonia, which is not compatible with having a league of legends player as your roommate). This introspection has gone so far as to make me question whether I'm even autistic, and hearing you talk about how it's so common for autistic people to do such a thing is reassuring.
I've gone to college now and after watching this, I feel a serious urge to suddenly shift my focus into something more creative instead of standardized into the future to potentially tap into myself a lot better, because I don't know if I can survive a 9-5 job where all I do is program random stuff that I don't care about. Maybe it'll go well, who knows, but for now, I'll try and find a path I can comfortably go down to take advantage of my interests in the best way possible.
Sorry if this was a bit rant-y, I just have a lot on my mind after watching this video, and I mean that in the best possible way because I love thinking about random stuff like this for nearly no reason, so thanks for giving me another reason to do so.
Love the vids, keep them up
I had no idea Hans Asperger was a Nazi, but the rapid abandonment of that term makes SO much sense now...
It is so comforting coming to this comment section to discover that it is full of people with similar circumstances to me. I was diagnosed with Asperger’s at the age of 3 (which may be the earliest here, surprisingly to me!) and in my school life I have hung out with so many different types of people to find truly great people to call my closest friends. It took 5 years, but I finally have a close circle, with equally understanding and funny friends who always make an attempt to make time for me.
Coincidentally, the day this was uploaded, I discovered that another guy I know and respect has ADHD. I was so surprised, since he is a very well composed young man. He just struggles with concentration, which would’ve been very difficult for me to notice at all. He is the 4th person who I regularly talk to in my life who I know has ADHD, but I’ve only ever known 1 person with Asperger’s, who I don’t speak to anymore.
Great video good sir! I'm also on the spectrum (was diagnosed really early, at the age of 7 and I'm now 22), and it's always interesting to hear about other people's experiences with it. As you said, we're all so different, but that's also what makes us beautiful. Without my autistic characteristics I simply wouldn't be me
Commenting for the algorithm, but also because I heavily appreciate these videos that you make. Being autistic myself (just diagnosed last year at 22) I found that I had already come to a lot of these conclusions that you presented through this video, but it's still incredibly gratifying just to hear someone else speak them aloud. Especially the section where you talk about gender identity in relation to autism, this is something that I've always felt but have never been able to put into proper words before. And man, that part where you said you have a drive that you don't know what to with? I FELT that shit.
Great work as always, and seriously - thank you for talking about this stuff, despite the fact that not everyone wants to listen.
Ever since that video I've been on a path of recognising that I might be on the spectrum. prior to the video I had never even considered it, The concept hadn't even come across my mind let alone had it ever been brought up to me growing up. I was 21 at the time, watching the video really opened my eyes when it came to pulling some parallels of the experiences you were talking about. I mulled over it for a good while before having a pretty dreadful prolonged experience at a work I was at the time.
I brought it up to a good friend online as it was stressing me out a good deal. It was surprising to me, but they assumed I had it and yet not even that much later someone at my workplace pointed out that I was showing Autistic tendencies. I ended up having an absolutely awful day with anxiety peaking to a level I hadn't experienced before, It was shit that seams stupid and irrelevant in hindsight but my brain just managed all of it completely wrong. The toxic work environment combined with everything else prior lead to me talking to my parents about it, and then trying to get help, or at the very least a diagnosis.
I made the call to my NHS based GP explaining all my issues and shit as best I could, I don't remember much of the conversation but was told I would be receiving another call from someone else who would help me. A couple weeks after I get this new lady who I then have to explain again, and after all that I find that she's an anxiety therapist.. Clearly this was a major part of what was gong on but the anxiety didn't feel like the core issue. I did try to persist but i ended up moving job and to an apartment, add the fact that I realised it wasn't going to be exactly easy ended up demoralising me considerably.
I ended up cancelling my appointments as they felt worthless and weren't working with my schedule. Fast forward like 2/3 months to now and I've kinda just left it, I'm way to busy and at least for the time being my mental state is considerably better at this new job. Let's see how long that lasts.
Either way thank you man, odds are I would've been a lot older before I even considered it. your video helped me a lot.
For years, I've sort of suspected that I had Autism, but my mother would always shoot down the idea when I'd bring it up. In her mind I think, Autism just looked like my cousin, who is closer to the High-Support Needs end of the spectrum. About eight months ago though, I started seeing a therapist for my anxiety and OCD, and she suggested that a lot of my anxiety could come from Autism. I finally decided to see a specialist to get assessed for it this year, and I got my diagnosis a few days ago. I've told a few family members about it, but I'm waiting for the paper work to come in the mail before telling my mom, cuz I know she's going to argue with me about it and say the psychologist is wrong. Meanwhile, I'm just so happy to finally know for sure. I just wish I'd known earlier.
Thank you so much for making the previous video and this one. You likely already got this by a lot of people, but simply discussing what autism is, how it is perceived by all kinds of people (including those on the spectrum), and your own experiences helped validate the experiences I've been through.
Similar to how you described your experiences, I admit that I also occasionally would have instances of intrusive thoughts. It takes so much energy just to keep up, or I guess "mask", my habits, yet I also tend to compare myself to others and start to think, "These people can just naturally do these tasks with no problem, but I need to use so much energy just to focus". Sometimes I wonder if I am forever fated to play the game of catch-up, finally reach a 'checkpoint', only to look back up and see that I still have yet to bridge the gap... If that makes any sense. I feel that no matter how much effort I put into developing myself, there is this disconnect between me and my peers, or just the people around me. There is something that I feel I inherently miss or lack that others naturally do, but I can never get it. You could probably guess this is a major source of insecurity haha.
Thankfully I have since worked on this, and your videos are a breath of fresh air. I gained a new perspective on the experiences/circumstances of my life from my condition. I accept it as something that is a part of me, both the "good and bad" of it. I hope by becoming a scientist myself, I could help in doing research to allow both ourselves and the world understand this neurological condition better, because by understanding something, do we fear and hate it less.
Thank you for another insightful video on the topic Fudj! I posted a wall of text comment on the last video, and for this video, it will probably be no different. These autism videos of yours just make me think a lot I guess!
I'm not autistic myself, but for 13 years there have been a paper somewhere that says otherwise. I was diagnosed at 15 years of age after being bullied for a couple of years. I was an over-analyzing, socially untrained kid living in a foster family. I guess you could say that I had the thinking of an adult but the social skills of a small child. Add the whole "not living with your real parents" thing and you have the recipe of being singled out as a weird 15 year old.
At this point, I was diagnosed and most people said that I shouldn't feel sad or that anything has changed. They will still treat me the same and the only change is that I now know about this limitation of mine and can work around it. Note that I call it limitation. This is because I didn't have anything in particular I was interested in or good at by the time I was diagnosed. So it felt like I had the hardships without the autistic superpowers everyone was talking about. This made me feel even more lonely and odd in the negative way.
Of course many of the people close to me who had promised not to treat me differently started doing so. Some of them seemed to read the general description of autism and faced me with that in mind rather than who they have learned that I am from experience. This still held true even later on when I discovered step by step that this diagnose doesn't apply to me. They see me as a diagnose instead of a person.
But let's move on to what I said about being wrongly diagnosed. When I went on to the next school tier (ages 16-19), that environment was a lot less hostile and I making friends was a lot easier. I developed social skills that I didn't know i was capable of and "the weird sides" of me weren't seen as problems anymore. It was the reboot I needed to discover that I was just the amount of "weird" I should be.
But even though I learned that it wasn't actually autism, I still feel a strong bond with the autistic community and also that I share some traits commonly associated with it. For example, I'm a deep and sometimes unconventional thinker who prepares loads of counter-arguements to everything I say just because I'm used to being questioned and feeling this need to always prove myself. Also, I become passionate about everything I do, and if I don't, I probably won't do it for very long. I guess it's similar to what you said about obsessing.
Long story short. I'm glad I had to go through all of this without being autistic. It has been such a blessing to get so entwined in this community and learn about it from the inside. I feel like I might have a false membership at this point, but I hope that doesn't rub people the wrong way. I will always stand up for the community, teach people about autism if necessary and give the support I can. After all, I have this community to thank for who I am today!
Thank you for pointing out the staring problem! I'm gonna talk to my doctor and see if I may have autism, because what you've said in these 2 videos are relatable to me, so thank you so much!
Hello again, we talked in Damo's stream.
I hope you keep up the quality stuff.
as an AMAB Trans Person I was diagnosed quite early on in my life, so early I never really knew what it meant to have Autism and no one felt to the need to explain it, so I wanna thank you for this and your previous video despite its flaws.
You're a man.
Hey Fudj, great video! Glad to hear more about the topic and your specific experiences with autism
This was a great follow-up video to the first one! In both videos I felt like you discussed the topic and your thoughts on it very well, and I for one have learned a lot about autism from both of these videos. I especially liked the section on the perceptions of autism, it really opened my eyes to how differently people are affected by it.
Super insightful stuff. Always glad to have your stuff pop up in the sub box. Regardless of what you choose to do, I just hope you enjoy it mate :)
When the first video came out, I couldn't find any content which I could relate to my experience of being on the spectrum. But your video seriously helped me so much. Just hearing about someone else's experience, made me feel less alone thank you.
Commenting for the algy.
Great video. Love your insight.
And yknow what, he’s pretty sick at guitar ‘n all
Those high/low support needs are called ASD levels.
ASD Level 1 - Level 1 ASD is currently the lowest classification. Those on this level will require some support to help with issues like inhibited social interaction and lack of organization and planning skills.
ASD Level 2 - In the mid-range of ASD is Level 2. In this level, individuals require substantial support and have problems that are more readily obvious to others. These issues may be trouble with verbal communication, having very restricted interests, and exhibiting frequent, repetitive behaviors.
ASD Level 3 - On the most severe end of the spectrum is Level 3 which requires very substantial support. Signs associated with both Level 1 and Level 2 are still present but are far more severe and accompanied by other complications as well. Individuals at this level will have limited ability to communicate and interact socially with others.
It’s a shame that being considered “well-adjusted” means fitting into a neurotypical role; it’s so frustrating and hurts and is just so dumb to have to deal with.. and agh, I dunno, I’m also autistic, and managed to fail that bc “my parents didn’t remember enough autistic criteria” even though I experience sensory overload, incredibly strict routine, an inability to do more than one thing at a time, and many other things.. but, I failed, and, thankfully I have parents who are incredibly understanding (and are both on the spectrum) but.. god; it’s just so scary to be in this world
I’m sorry haha, your video really has hit very hard for me, I’m very thankful there’s someone on here who’s able to talk about it, and be a good influence, eheh.. sorry aa
Thank you for your videos. I have friends on the autism spectrum and you have really helped to give me a better perspective on it. I hope things stabilize for you financially, but I am very happy to maybe see some of your amazing content again! Take care of yourself dude
I guess I should really consider myself lucky to have been diagnosed around 5th grade, I didn't know that it that much of a commin issue to be diagnosed late
Not only am I on the spectrum, I'm a hyper affectionate extrovert. If that sounds like it doesn't work... Yeah. It's rough. I'd like to share one of most important things I've learned. I love data. I want as much as I can get my sticky hands on. Not only do most people find it intrusive, but it made it hard for me to apologize. Apparently, people take details as making excuses. Keep is short and sweet. Go figure.
just wanted to say this was a good and insightful video. your experiences really resonated with my own
After watching your first video I got thinking about it and ended up asking my therapist if I might have autism. She pointed out the overlap with ADHD which I am diagnosed with, then moved so we never really chased it down.
A lot of my family is on the spectrum so it made some sense but I still really have no idea about myself. Currently I suspect it just a more liquid thing, like ADHD and autism are in the same pool and i'm just more on the ADHD side.
Anyway I really admire how you're using your platform to spread awareness about autism and donkey kong (separately i'm not calling donkey autistic)
Ayyy I'm back here because I saw it again, got my diagnosis!
Videos like these are very important, so thank you Fudj
Man, these kinds of videos really make me feel like there's good content left on here. Amazing video, i really hope it gets the attention it deserves
2:57 I got diagnosed around 11-12 and I'm 16 now!
I feel like I’ve been waiting for this kind of video for my whole life.
Another good video! For sure your words have opened up quite a few things to consider. I also think though that as much as people put money into sanctions that can benefit people with Autism or change others perceptions that of Autism (or anything else for that matter); we can only affect our behaviors towards others. It’s a broad statement, no doubt, not everyone is as bright as you Fudj and aren’t willing to correct themselves. Hell, I have that problem too. The main takeaway for me personally is to just… try. Try to do better no matter what. Focus on yourself and your outlook to inadvertently influence others in a positive manner. Thanks for the video, even if you don’t think you deserve the admiration, I still want to tell you that because I want to give my gratitude!
This is a great video, thanks for making it. I really appreciate an opportunity to learn more about my condition, especially in a form thats as engaging and well made as this
25:40 maybe that's why he named it Tesla
It was your streams that gave me the idea, that I could be autistic. And this video makes me more and more believe that it's true. Though it has been months ago since I first suspected I might have adhd. Luckily for me I need definetly low support.
Oh my goodness the classic monster Hunter music usage was brilliant
Hell yeah! Time to resubscribe!
Autistic "Art" and 'Art made by Autistic People" are two very different things.
I DONT have THE autistim or autistic but I find these videos SO INTERESTING!!!!!
Thank you for this! I love all your content, and videos like these helps my ignorance on the topic, due to my brother being undiagnosed at 30, in both videos I feel your points have helped me understand him more. I hope you are able to make a living from doing this and continue for as long as you can:)
I don't have autism, but I respect them. I have undifferentiated schizophrenia.
wonderful video my Fudjiness. really respect the way you have actively engaged in the conversation on this topic by addressing your previous video, and especially the quick aside. you are doing a great job my friend x
Why do shoelaces even exist? What ever happened to those velcro shoes? (I got more out of this video than this but idk how to articulate it so this is my comment. Anytime I try to think of an actual smart comment I feel like I am wording it wrong or something so yeah.)
What a fucking triumph
I suck at guitar, and hardly feel like I can even learn it at all, maybe try drumming sometime? That's my musical outlet.
i love your videos please keep and i hope you get more popular. youre really my favorite video creator
Haven't finished the video, but hawt damn do I recognise the whole thing with observing people. Thankfully my friends have told me that they actually like me a lot for it, because their get to learn about themselves ^_^ (I also am highly certain they are on the spectrum as well though, so I guess it makes more sense?) And I am Autistic yes. I can feel a bit annoyed if neurotypical people say they also do that thing that I mentioned I do. Like... It's not really the same, but also, pretty much everyone has Autistic traits. Now that I think about it, am I the only one that doesn't get better because I get told other people have the same problems as me? (Like, from professional people, that also deal with people on the spectrum)
Thanks Fudj
dude, what you said about trans people is easily the best take i've ever heard. as an nb person with so many trans friends, thanks
the most empowered I've ever felt is watching Neurotypical people struggle with games like Bloodborne while I steam roll through it.
Linus Tech tips showed ur channel in the Steam Deck video
I like your video and the message I think I saw in it. hope to interesting and weird stuff from you in the future.
Thank you
Fucking phenomenal video
Good video
Fuck yes Silver version
thank you for stepping up for trans people in that "aside" - that really made me smile and feel cared for and understood :) i'm non-binary (and suspected autistic but not dx'd) and i think you are absolutely spot on in your analysis. in addition to the extra introspection and self-critique we have to do greatly increasing the likelihood for us to end up examining our relationship to the gender spectrum, for me it also has to do with gender being a *social* construct and the way that most neurotypical social rules seem arbitrary and nonsensical anyway. like gender is just another one of those strange NT social dynamics in my eyes, and i will not follow rules that don't make sense to me lol.
One of my favorite little anecdotes was a tumblr post talking about how people say that autism is getting more and more common. In essence, the post said "the condition isnt getting more common, the world is just more hostile towards autistic people, so its more noticeable. Back in 15th century england, nobody was called autistic, but there was the strange little son of the blacksmith who doesn't really talk to anyone but is really good at churning butter." I dont know why i love it but its just so simple but it works so well
That's interesting, because I would have said that the world is becoming more and more accommodating of neurodivergent people. Certainly awareness of those conditions is more of a public topic than it's ever been before. Maybe I'd argue that stigmatization of spectrum disordered individuals reached a peak sometime in the 20th century (when stigmatization of basically anything other than straight, white, male, and neutrotypical was an all time high) and we've been trying to come down from that ever since. At least in recent times, though, I would attribute the increasing levels of autism to better testing and an expansion of the definition of what behaviors spectrum disorders include.
@@tristanneal9552 neurodivergent
@@ADeeSHUPA ...I'm confused. Did I use the word incorrectly or...?
I am not disagreeing, nor agreeing
Autism is getting more and more common, that's a fact. That does not necessarily mean that there are more autistic people. There are generally 3 reasons that there are more 'autistic' people:
1. People just did not know about autism.
2. It could be genetics
3. There are more people getting tested / the characteristics/qualifications are changed (a ''checklist'')
@@tristanneal9552 the world only has become as accommodating as it is because of how hostile its basic structures are. School and jobs lasting 8 or so hours a day and requiring you to sit still and focus on one task, large cities with tons of sounds and people that cause sensory issues, a lot of social interaction being necessary to make a living for yourself, etc. If the world wasn't in the state that it is, neurodivergent people wouldnt need as many exceptions.
These videos are kind of magical.
In a world that is often so dismissive, even by professionals on the topic, hearing someone be open and positive about the spectrum is such a breath of fresh air and those are often things that get ignored.
"Autistic people tend to have a habit of always thinking they're right"
To the contrary, I have a habit of always thinking I did or am doing something wrong.
I’ve known I was autistic since I was a young child, and it’s only now in adulthood that I’ve really started to come to terms with what that means. When you’re diagnosed at that age in America, you’re isolated from your peers in the name of “teaching you social skills”… which we would have learned regardless by interacting with other kids our age. I was told my autism was something that could be ‘overcome’, something you ‘grow out of’. In order to escape their Special Ed program I had to prove I could mask my autistic traits well enough to go to high school alone.
It’s only now that I’ve been free of that awful system for so many years that I understand what Autism really is and how differently it affects those who have it. Autistics are expressive; we are creative; we are passionate; we are introspective. We love what we love so much. You’re right on the money about introspection: I firmly believe that’s the reason there’s such a large intersectionality between Autistic and Transgender people.
I'm from France and... I kinda had that as well. I had to fight my heart out to have the right to be treated like the other kids and avoid the constant bullying and setbacks put into me. However, when I got out of school, I basically wasn't me anymore, I could "pass", sure, but I'd just come-off as a "lesser" person. More lazy, selfish and/or stupid by default and so, it's even more of an uphill battle especially when you're tricked into feeling imposter syndrome for your own autism by our society. And when you finally accept yourself, you finally allow yourself to live more, even if you've forgot how that works, and you finally open-up on deep things about you that most people wouldn't. It's amazing, in a way, to introspect that much, but it's also a shame that it's done in such a way because building your own identity as an autistic person is so much more harder I feel like and it's also why I feel like there's such an intersectionality between the two.
Glad you decided to talk about this subject again, the last video was very interesting and introduced me to your channel.
Never in my life has a video so succinctly identified my struggles with being autistic.
I can relate to almost everything you said on a personal level, especially the bit about TH-cam being the only job you *can do*, how working is so mentally and emotionally draining that whilst having to pretend to be neurotypical, you begin lementing how sad and meaningless it feels to be stifled by the conditions and how you fear the possibility of that being what you do the rest of your life.
I've worked 3 jobs, 2 in food service, and one job as a general laborer at a warehouse. The longest I've worked was 8 months, and for 3 years now I've been unemployed and essentially trapped at home, where the only value I can provide to my family is basic chores and emotional support. I constantly feel useless because of my inability to work, and I had a friend recently give up on me because he thought I was using my autism as an excuse to not work. Of course, money problems are a constant problem for me as well. If I can't do TH-cam, what CAN I do? It feels like the only chance I have to be happy, but getting the money for a computer, editing software, and all the other things that I have no experience with is a brick wall between me and some semblance of self fulfillment. I just want to be happy, man. Idk what to do 😔
I can't believe how your comment can hit so close to home for me, even though I haven't gone through everything you have. In that regard, you have my most sincere sympathies. I can't say whether I have autism or not because I feel as though I've had mixed signals given to me in my young adulthood, but I can relate to some of what you've said. There are days where I feel that regardless of how bad of a platform it has become lately, I still feel tempted to make a serious attempt at entertaining others through TH-cam. Both for the sake of being productive and having an income, and for my own personal creative ambitions and desires. Albeit, one of the things holding me back is that lack of proper equipment and software that you've mentioned. And while I wouldn't mind sucking it up and trying to get an offline job (mostly so that I feel like I fit in with the rest of society; if almost everyone else gets to do something, then I want to do it at least once in my life too,) something tells me I'd have a mental breakdown from trying to cope with socializing with so many different people in public and not upset or offend someone with my behavior. It sucks, you know? Damned if you, damned if you don't.
Anyway though, that's left me stuck at home for many years too, and I don't really get to contribute much either. Just whatever emotional support I can offer and any house work or yard work I manage to get done. Like you, I feel useless and just want to be happy. Or more specifically, I want to feel like I'm actually living my life, instead of being stuck in this rut. It's driving me crazy. So since I can relate in some way, I guess your comment hit me pretty hard just now. I'm hoping things get better for you; no one deserves to be stuck or miserable like this.
I really hope this video does well. In my experience, most media concerning autism is very... infantilizing? It tends to look down on autistic people (usually kids/teens), either by insulting them or talking about them as though they don't understand basic shit.
I watched your first video on autism before my ASD diagnosis, and this one after it. I don't think it's an exaggeration to say that your first video changed my life; it made me seriously want to try and get a clear answer, after so much confusion and feeling like I didn't belong. It reoriented my career trajectory as well, as after I had this diagnosis, I transferred collages to pursue my true passion - writing music for video games. Making friends here has been hard, but much more doable after knowing myself better.
This video was a very good follow-up, and I want to send it to my neurotypical friends for them to learn from. Particularly what you said in this video about trans and non-binary people is true - I am a trans woman, and I am glad that you brought this up, and clarified the real reason behind this correlation.
It was very interesting to hear you again on this same topic from a much different point in my life, even after just ten months. I love all your other videos about video games too, so I'm really glad you're continuing youtube. (Also, Undertale is one of my special interests, so I hope you enjoy it.)
Your first video was partially responsible for helping me to realize that I may have ASD. After I got diagnosed with ADHD late last year, my psychologist suggested that she saw in me some symptoms of ASD and let me know that getting tested for it was an option. Eventually I decided to go for it and I was diagnosed.
When you talked about how getting diagnosed as an adult sucks, I felt that (though I didn’t really have a bad experience). I’ve naturally just built up habits and mechanisms that make it difficult to detect my autism and so the only way I was able to be diagnosed was by hearing about what I was like as a child.
Honestly I still don’t know what to do with this information, especially since I’m very much on the Low Support Needs end of the spectrum. I feel like I can’t tell people about it because it would create a bunch of questions rather than clear anything up.
Regardless, thank you for sharing your story. It’s always encouraging to hear from you!
Also, I know you probably know this and I know it sucks, but if you want your videos to do better, you gotta censor yourself a little bit. TH-cam doesn’t like bad words
As someone who is on the spectrum myself, thank you so much for your content and discussing this topic. I have had several similarities to what you've described. When you got into the relationship side of it, it really made me feel less alone. the fear of letting others down, not being enough and being too clingy is very real to me. You've done a great job on research! Hearing you're personal struggles and how you've overcome them, but also admitting that there's still some struggles that you may still have is something I can relate to a lot. I needed to hear this and it really helps. Thank you!
30:26 I’m so glad you brought this up at all. My tendency to obsess about things endlessly is something that I’ve been ashamed to even think about, let alone talk to anyone about. I feel so much less like a wierdo who only ever thinks about/does one thing.
It’s something I try to control, and even channeled into improving at drawing/coding, but in the end it’s just linked to who I am.
43:31 Honestly, this weirdly hit home for me. A message I feel like I really needed to hear, after the last couple years being some of the lowest points in my life, which just so happened to be coupled with by far my favorite Monster Hunter village theme, one I've associated for a while now with peace, support, and tranquility. I know I'm just one random dingus in the TH-cam comments section, but sincerely, thank you.
Idk anything about your life, but my last couple of years have been fucking awful so I really vibed with your comment. Hope it gets better for you soon
19:17 Hit hard, I've always struggled with motivation for school even though I've always done extremely well. I always have a sense of dread with me when I'm not there, but I never found anybody who felt the same. After watching this it really clicked for me, that I wasn't the only person experiencing similar feelings and that I'm not trapped, thank you.
Man, you just continue to deliver. Every upload is superb, and the careful consideration you clearly put into this work is something I really respect. The through-line of difference and it’s benefits and challenges was beautiful. I hope this *art* gets you to the point where going viral isn’t a necessity.
Fair Use Fudge had a real breakout performance in this episode, definitely a fan favorite character if I've ever seen one
Another great video Fudj. I'm not on the autistic myself but you've been a very positive influence in my understanding of what it's like to live with autism and be on the spectrum. I commend you good sir.
I'm not sure if I want the diagnosis anymore. I'm scared of how the state might treat me as a "disabled" person in the future, possibly denying me agency which I already worry about enough as a trans person. I already have the right to support structures by being diagnosed with severe depression. I still have a 100 page or so ASD/ADHD questionnaire sit in my room, including questions for friends and parents. Knowing I'm autistic for myself is enough. It helps me understand myself.
havent finished the video yet, but i watched the first video last night and can relate to many of the frustrations that you were covering. I have ADHD and its the first time i felt understood when it comes to not being able to do things as easy as others and the intense introspection i go through everyday, hearing and seeing how you've been able to get by whiles expressing the creative part of yourself has given me with hope so I thank you.
Haven't watched the video yet but I just wanna say that I'm really grateful for you helping to spread awareness about autism, it really helps make it easier for me to deal with it and I'm glad that you're open about your struggles. Keep up the good work!
Edit: Just finished watching and goddamn... You really hit the nail on the head on alot of your points. You made me realise some things ive always noticed but i just couldnt quite understand why they were happening or why i was like that, thank you so much for making these videos
this video really hit home for me who has aspergers. growing up my handwriting was terrible and i flapped my hands,and moved my arms like crazy. i also was terrified of fire drills at school and would get scared to tears cause of it. however, this doesnt have to define me i can still make a huge impact with time, dedication and whatever energy i have. youre channel puts a smile on my face every time i watch your reviews and it helps me whos struggling with self hatred and self doubt. seriously thank you for making the content you do and im excited to see what you can create in the future
I adore videos like this and this one in particular has really gotten me to think about some things. Being neurotypical myself and having a mom who works as an elementary school psychologist, I didn't entirely understand who she worked with on a daily basis, I always saw them as numbers, if that makes any sense. "Oh, my mom has 3 reports due this month, that's 3 people who either are on the spectrum or not," and that kind of stuff, but hearing your story has led me to see the other side and what those 9 or 10 year old's go through every day of their life and many days after. It seemed almost like a doctor diagnosing some form of illness, when it really is much, much more than that. These are people, just like the rest of us, who see the world in a new and interesting light, and they have to treated as such.
I hope you continue to make videos like this in the future, along with the normal video essay content you've made in the past!
I have severe dyspraxia and autism
I don’t have much problems with my autism as I had my diagnosis at 5.
My dyspraxia is so bad it is considered a disability. Many people I talk to think its my autism but I just can’t work in any manual or social settings. I could live off government support but I don’t want to. One day I will find something I both want to do and can do.
My mom says there are as many forms of autism as there are autistic people
Well my parents knew i was autistic since i was like born pretty much. But i didnt know until i was around 13. Id say my mental illnesses in general were at there worst during puberty. Which is common for even "normal" people. Because when i turned 18 everything just all of sudden changed and i started acting like a adult and stuff. Like i snapped in a good way. I still have alot of maturing and learning to do but comparing my current life to my oast difference is staggering. It was probably the stress of school. Once i dropped out and got my GED i was way happier.
To add to the depictions of autism in media, it can be really subtle. obviously there is still this binary view of autism, but I think I fall into this band where people might have a suspicion I'm autistic but they probably doubt themselves. I had a pretty close friend in secondary school, talked pretty much every day for 3-4 years. They found out I was autistic when I told them in my last week of school. They themselve have autism as well. It shows that you can't just look at someone and go "oh yeah, they're autistic".
I'm very luckly to have gotten such an early diagnosis, I think I was 9 or 10, and I sympathise with anyone who can't get the answers they deserve.
btw, I can't tie laces either. I highly recommend elastic laces, turns everything into a slip-on shoe.
also, I can't read 24 hour clocks.
Most self-diagnosed people do a _lot_ of research when determining whether they have a something like autism or ADD. I think the image most people get when thinking about self-diagnosis is that of a kid looking at a few memes about autism and concluding that they have autism. But I assure you, they do their research. I recently have been pondering my sexuality, but before concluding whether I'm straight or not, I'm looking into all the different labels and identities. I personally think self-diagnosis is A-OK, as long as you do your research.
Sure, but if you do extensive research with a bias towards a particular outcome, all of that information is going to be filtered in a way that skews it towards your preconceived conclusion. Lack of information is not the problem, the problem is bias and a lack of perspective.
It's not okay. People don't know themselves that well because they only have their own perspective. That's why trained psychiatrist are important for diagnosis
we can not let this video flop
I have autism too you did a great job with this video
I love that bit at the end about boundaries. It seemed like a nice, loving, but very stern way of letting everyone know that you appreciate them but back the fuck up 🤣.
I wish I could catch you live on stream because I would love to see you, the person, unedited and unscripted.
Also, I want to thank you for all the times that you give hints to or outright state how bleak things can be with autism when it comes to social interaction. So many people, in my opinion, are ignored because they have genuine issues but are afraid to say what they are feeling because they think what they feel might be overdramatic to other people. So instead, they keep things vague like "I feel bad" or worse, tell the people they talk to that those people are jerks but don't give enough detail as to why they feel that way.
Thank you so much for this video. Although I've never gotten any sort of diagnosis, many of the points in both of these 2 videos really hit home for me. I don't exactly know how to say some of the things I'm going to say, and it'll probably be a bit clunky, so please, bear with me. Ever since I was young, I've always had trouble with social interaction. I really noticed when I got to middle school though. I think part of that was that many of the difficulties and differences that I had shown as a kid were more accepted and excused by society because "he's just a kid." So it took me a little bit to really realize this. I'm not good at introducing myself to people and even then, it's hard for me to grow a deeper connection to people. I think part of it is that I don't know what to say a lot of the time, but I also am worried about saying something that will push people away or make them weirded out. I've always had trouble with trying to have people like me. I'm not sure if it's seeking approval or that I just don't want people to dislike me. I'm not sure what it is. I still struggle with that to this day. People say, not everyone will like you, but I still haven't gotten over that. I would consider the friends that I have to be very weird people that most people wouldn't gravitate towards, but I think I've finally figured out why I've been drawn to these types of people. They're typically more open and less judgy. I really feel like I can say anything around them and they'd be just fine with it. It helps alleviate my fears of alienating people. I really like being around my friends, they make me the happiest that I ever could be, but I have trouble making friends and growing the connection with them. I'm always ready to help my friends with anything, no matter what's going on in my life. I just always feel like I need to help them, even if I may be having difficulties of my own. I always have pushed away my own struggles and worries to help my friends before myself. Part of that might be the fact that I'm extremely empathetic towards other people, but not so much to myself. Many of the feelings I feel when I'm by myself are very neutral and mostly apathetic. But the emotions I end up feeling are usually from other people. It's so strong that I really feel the emotions of others on a screen from a video or movie. Even if I know that it's fake, like fake crying or something, it makes me feel like I'm going to start crying and makes me feel sad, even though I know it's fake. I feel the feelings of others as if they're my own, but mine just aren't really there. Whenever people ask me how I'm doing, I say I'm good, but in reality, I'm not really happy or sad or angry, or anything. Just neutral and apathetic. If I ever try to explain that I feel neutral and that's what's "good," they just don't understand and most don't want to understand besides a little bit of curiosity. People ask me why I haven't been in a relationship yet at 17 and how many women would love to have a guy like me, but I've never really tried or cared enough to go after a relationship with someone. At least not right now. I would love to have one eventually, to have a deeper connection with someone, but I haven't really pursued it. It's like, I would like something deeper, but I don't know how to get to that point, and I don't really end up pursuing them either. Your struggles on working a "normal" job really rings home for me. I used to work at a factory, they had a teenage program there, and just working there for 6 hours 4-5 times a week was one of the most draining things of my life. I never wanted to do anything before work even though I had plenty of time for it because I was hung up about how I need to leave at this time to get to work at this time to do my job and leave at this time. It was in my head most of the day, even on days where I wasn't working. I felt like all of my creative contributions were being drained and that I was just a lifeless worker put through a system that doesn't accommodate my aspirations and talents. From a young age I've always needed to do things a certain way. I always stack my clothes the same way, I always shower the same way, I just go through life the same way. Not exactly planned out or anything, but I need to do things in a certain way or in a certain order to get them done. Whenever something new happens that I didn't expect, it's hard for me to adjust to the new changes and I find myself obsessing over making sure that I'm ready for it to happen, even days ahead of time, and I get ready for things sometimes hours before I need to go to them because I don't want to be late and I've been thinking about it since I knew about it. I always have a problem getting obsessed too. For example, one day, I'll be completely obsessed with playing the piano and becoming really good at it and the next day, I'll completely drop it and be obsessed with drawing and the cycle continues. There are very few things that I've had a continued interest towards in my life. Things that come to mind are certain movies, shows, and video games. I get completely obsessed with those things that I get attached to, but it either is a fleeting interest, or rarely, something that's a continual obsession in something that I can't let go of. People make fun of me for how interested I am in things like Star Wars and superheroes, and it always hurts, even if it's just a joke. I can't help how obsessed I get over these things, and they are things that truly make me happy, but then people will make fun of me for it. It doesn't help that my parents aren't very accommodating either. My adoptive mom has always theorized that I'm on the spectrum, but she never wanted me to get diagnosed because she didn't want me to get labelled and treated differently. Which, I understand why she has that thought process and in a way, I sort of agree with what she's saying. But she seems to think that any of these qualities I have are a liability and that they need to be worked on so that I can get rid of them and be more like "most people." So, it's really frustrating to have these difficulties and to have all the cons that come from them, but I know that I can't really talk about it with her because not only would she not understand, but she would just want me to get rid of them when they're a part of who I am and I can't just change them. I feel like in my life I have no one that would understand these difficulties and so I never talk about them, I just try to push through. These videos have made me realize that this is unhealthy and that having these qualities is perfectly okay and even good in some ways. And that these qualities aren't worse or better, but different and just need to be accommodated for differently. Sorry for how long this is and how personal this is, but these videos really touched my heart and I felt like I had to let these feelings out. So, thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Hold on, the first video was already 11 months ago? Where did the time go?
after playing both in this video, im confused. did u grow up as a pokemon gold player or pokemon silver player. it cannot be both fudj
I’m sorry I couldn’t watch the whole video in one sitting, I really wanted to do my part to help you in the algorithm… I don’t think I’m on the spectrum and a lot of the stuff spoken about didn’t really apply to me but I found the video very interesting and appreciate the way you see the world.
I recently talked to a friend about a lot of mental problems I've been having for a while now, mostly from a discussion about how missing medication for depression can really fuck you up. For reference I am not diagnosed with anything nor am I on any sort of medication, but that discussion finally sparked me to try and see someone about these issues. I bring this up because I've been thinking for a long time now that it might also be very possible I'm on the spectrum, and I think this would also be a good chance to start the process of figuring that out too. I can relate to so much of what you've said here and in the previous video, and honestly it something I probably should've looked into a long time ago, but family life makes that somewhat difficult to say the least. I'm not entirely sure what point I want to make by typing this comment out, but I feel a strong urge to at least say something, to say that "Hey, your videos are helping and driving me to seek things out about myself that I should have long ago". So hey, thanks for sharing your stories and giving insight about these things. Hopefully the next time you make a video discussing autism, I'll be able to comment about how things have gone and if I have the answers I want. It might take a long time, but I really think I'm finally starting to get to a point where I understand myself.
As an autistic trans man who has unsupportive family due to them thinking being autistic means I can't be trans, thank you so much for that aside on autistic trans folks like myself. It meant a whole lot to hear that, especially when so many people want to gaslight us into believing that because we're autistic we can't possibly know ourselves when in fact it's the exact opposite. All in all a fantastic video and highly relatable, thank you for making this
This video gives me a lot of feels haha… I’m 22 and have known I have ADHD my whole life, but only really understood it for the past 2 years and had help and treatment for it since october 2021! And ever since covid started, and my understanding of mental health has drastically expanded, I’ve had the question “Have I been autistic all this time, too?” Runs through my head constantly. Quite literally every single day. I’m really scared to bring it up to my family and therapist because of the stigma that it is a developmental disorder and clearly it “didn’t affect me that negatively” so i can’t have it, right? I dunno, I have awesome online friends who listen to me and treat me well, so maybe my confidence will grow and I’ll learn to be assertive enough to ask for help in the future, but to you and everyone else watching who’s somewhere on the autism or ADHD or whatever else spectrums, we all matter and deserve to live in a society that works for us, too ❤️
We’re not worse, we’re not better… just different!