>Meet this girl in Whiterun >She follows me around since I'm thane >I buy the little house available >The place has virtualy nothing inside (you shit in a bucket) >Girl is down for marriage Take notes , lads .
Dating in Skyrim is more like that scene from Terminator 3 when Arnold tells John Connor about how he and Kate are supposed to "mate" and have children. Arnold even has the Nord accent and everything. "She is a healthy woman of child-bearing age." All it takes is two things: 1) Being alive. 2) Wearing an Amulet of Mara
@@Ohflipsnap It's my understanding that the current theory is that women with autism present differently (and are better at masking symptoms) than men, so they can get missed, or at least misdiagnosed. I know a woman that's nearly 40 that just got diagnosed as being on the ADHD and ASD spectra (in addition to the depression and anxiety that she already knew she had), and it's made me wonder just how many women are out there in a similar position to where she was.
dating in morrowind: go right up the stairs from the front door, NOT the upper door to the terrasse, then turn left at the top of the stairs and go down to the end of the street. the girl at the end of the street: i don't know you, outlander, what do you want?
@@RaTcHeT302 long story short, and after watching a 4 hour lore video. Some dudes get freaky with hagravens. These are called hag husbands. The offspring of this pairing is likely the origin story of the Augur of Dunlain before he turned into pure magicka. He was a hagraven human hybrid, and as such a naturally gifted mage
I swear to God, Skyrim girls are the easiest in all of Nirn. Here are some of the actual conditions for them to accept marriage: -Chop firewood for her -Give her a single batch of frost salts -Beat her in a brawl -Give her 10 bear pelts -Give her 20 grapes -Hire her for 500 gold
If that time travelling mothman from the late 4th/early 5th era can be trusted, love is central to the purpose of Nirn. Ah, I just remembered how depictions of the myths of Anu and Padhome fighting for Nirni occur in many Tamrielic cultures.
Ironic, since the only character one can romance in Morrowind was Ahnassi. Sweet, sweet Ahnassi. As sweet as the finest moon sugar, more sultry than a bottle of Balmora Blue skooma. A very special friend for Khajiit...
@@EarlyMistyou can meet her the same day you arrive on Vvardenfel. You can find her in a tavern in Pelagiad. She'll give you a few quests and after each of them you will become closer friends. Eventually she'll give you the key of her house and you can use it as your own base. However be aware that only male characters will be able to get quests from her.
@@UlvenTESThe Magic Font cards that Morrowind used was cool and stylish in appearance. Oblivion's Kingthings was great too. Noticed that in your title card in between bits. Skyrim uses Futura Condensed which looks so boring and sad in comparison.
Absolutely, man! It really *does* make me sad. Such a great reminder how Bethesda games got more and more soulless :/ Waiting for Comic Sans in TES6. Yay...
@@UlvenTESMorrowind's color palette is vibrant and alive while Skyrim's is duller Skyrim usually has colors closer to gray and those that are not usually more opaque and "dirty" (obviously excluding nature) while Morrowind has a greater variety in its colors and these also tend to be more saturated giving them a bigger sense of being vibrant
The Oblivion one could have fooled me if there was no video. Impressive, Bethesda really went for full real life imersion, too bad they went to the place for special kids as their main and only reference.
Ah, morrowind. Probably the only place where you can date a cat. Who is also a monk. Working for thieves guild. And it's a very, very good cat. And everything goes nice until she mentions her ex. Then you help the ex to drop his chem habits. Then everything keeps going well and never goes wrong. In fact, you get bed and board out of it! The only problem is, you have to pack the meat to get these benefits.
Her (a complete stranger): Hello. I see you are wearing an amulet of Mara. Want to get married? Me: Please stop bothering me, I just started a new game and this is my only enchanted amulet.
"How can Ahnassi not see? Must she be blind? She sees you walk, and she likes what she sees. It is her profession, to see such things as the flow of the body, and the grace of the eye, and admire."
Skyrim marriage is in a way the ultimate real life simulator. All you get to do is talk about cooking, money and the kids, and be happy that you at least sleep in the same bed.
I expected a slavery joke in "Dating in Morrowind" section. Since all the quest about buying a slave and making her look like a noblewoman for some old ashlander and stuff...
Oblivion: *[can't get a girlfriend]* Skyrim: - _"Wanna get married?"_ - _"OK."_ Morrowind: *[goes to Sadrith Mora to buy an Argonian girlfriend for 500 septims]*
>meet some altmer girl in solitude >Slags off my robes >"Hey that's Thalmor robes you're slagging off" >Wants me to wear a suit she made when I go see the jarl >Jarl says it's cool >Altmer girl down to dirty anytime Wtf is wrong with people in Skyrim. I swear everyone has a permanent brain freeze.
Skyrim dating: "Look, we ain't got time to shit around. You wanna get married or not?" "Cool. Guess that means I love ya then." *Procede to kidnapping.*
Heh skyrim just made me think of one of the valve official videos for teamfortress 2, the one where the scout has a bucket of chicken and then asks the girl beside him if she wants to do it. In skyrim the bucket of chicken is the amulet of mara.
*Dating people in Skyrim* “Hey, remember that time I dropped α pair of old boots on the ground and decided to let you keep them? Wanna get married?” “Sure, why not.”
Actually in Skyrim it's more like, "Hey lady or gentleman, like the favor I did you? Now look, I'm wearing a specific religious necklace." "YES, we met exactly one time before and you did exactly one thing for me, so let's absolutely get married in a country where there's no such thing as divorce and there is no legal way out!"
To be fair, if you don't like your spouse in Skyrim, all you need to do is wait like two weeks and they'll either get eaten by a dragon or get stabbed to death by one of the many varieties of shirtless homeless men.
@@PaxJurassicus I've never had that happen. I don't think those things spawn when you're away. Of course some players take a more hands-on approach to removing no-longer-wanted additions to their virtual lives. Not sure I can say it more directly without tripping Google's censorbot.
Before I got mods in Skyrim, the only reason for me to use the idiot marriage system was to get an extra body to live in my house and help defend it. Since mods, I haven't even touched an Amulet of Mara. Fuck "relationships" in video games, and fuck people who think they're a good idea.
Use dating system like in Grand Theft Auto to make a girl fall in love with you😂😂😂 I think that would be way different experience proven how good you are as a ladies man😂😂😂
Everyone in Oblivion was on the spectrum
Yes ahaha 👌
Everyone in Cyrodil. That's canon
Very true.
Lololol
On the deep end.
Oblivion: "i don't know you and i don't want to know you"
Skyrim: "what is it? Can't stand the sight of a strong nord woman?"
Morrowind: "N'wah"
That sums it up pretty accurately
In the morrowind one, if both parties say N'wah, they start fucking.
Don't care to know you* ya heretic.
@@DarkOmegaMK2 i didn't know Morrorwind took palce in Georgia 😂
Morrowind: "Let me tell you about the native flora of the Ascadian Isles."
>Meet this girl in Whiterun
>She follows me around since I'm thane
>I buy the little house available
>The place has virtualy nothing inside (you shit in a bucket)
>Girl is down for marriage
Take notes , lads .
You mean to tell me that status and wealth attracts women? Shit bro Skyrim is realistic after all
I think most people in Skyrim shit in buckets to be fair, they even added little shit buckets to some dungeons which was lovely
You owning a tiny shack with your own bucket to shit in? You intentionally flexing on Millenials aren't you? 🤡
Kind of hard to find a house for 5000 gold these days
Once I bought a mammuth tusk for a girl in Whiterun and guess what? She is my wife now. Also I'm a talking cat.
Oblivion pick up line : Have you heard of the high elves ?
😂
Seen any _elves?_
*laughs maliciously*
@@jeremytitus9519
Seen any.... elves?!
Hahahhahahahahahhahahahah!
typical convo
npc 1: I saw a mud crab on my walk. awful creatures.
npc 2: im done talking
Her: I hear that the high elves trains them(goblins)
*disposition 10*
Dating in Skyrim is more like that scene from Terminator 3 when Arnold tells John Connor about how he and Kate are supposed to "mate" and have children. Arnold even has the Nord accent and everything.
"She is a healthy woman of child-bearing age."
All it takes is two things:
1) Being alive.
2) Wearing an Amulet of Mara
You are creative ahahah
Number one is optional if you are a vampire, right?
All those women and yet the Dragonborn wants serena
If only life were that simples 😅😅😅
Dragonborn starts the game with Legendary 100 Rizz and all perks
Oblivion and autism, a match made in heaven
😂😂
This explains why Oblivion is my favorite game
That Oblivion woman is a bit of a lucky find when you consider the ratio of autistic women to autistic men is rather low.
@@Ohflipsnap It's my understanding that the current theory is that women with autism present differently (and are better at masking symptoms) than men, so they can get missed, or at least misdiagnosed. I know a woman that's nearly 40 that just got diagnosed as being on the ADHD and ASD spectra (in addition to the depression and anxiety that she already knew she had), and it's made me wonder just how many women are out there in a similar position to where she was.
@@Ohflipsnap Autism in women is underdiagnosed since an autistic woman just has the emotional intelligence of a neurotypical man.
'Is that an amulet of Mara? Wana Fu...'
'10% MORE HEALING, BABY!'
😂😂
🤣
Skyrim dating: I dont gotta look nice, she's just digging my ice
Oh ho that's a good one.
I'm sorry please.
Your a big fat liar.
My life is drab in comparison.
I'm sorry, that's just not funny.
Modded Skyrim: So you're a crab with a top hat I see?
Ahahahah
Why yes I woulpr9tect you from that flying ruffian tomhas the tank engine darling
that's where I draw the line. come on masterchief, let's get the PHUC out of here.
Missed the fact that the only NPC your character can actually have a relationship with in Morrowind is a Khajit rogue.
Special friend
Just like Barenziah
dont be sharing this little secret
why would you want a relationship with anyone else
Only a true N'wah would date the chosen N'wah.
Ok that second scene took me by surprise that was adorable 😅
Really cute indeed ahah
She dumped him though
@@mightystu49 Typical woman...
@@ent66 fact: women don't HAVE to date you.
@@Smarackto 🤓
Skyrim Marriage
Dragonborn: We both got buckets of chicken, wanna do it?
Ysolda: Eh, ok
I UNDERSTOOD THAT REFERENCE
"You wanna be my lover? Earn that!"
I think all my time playing Oblivion as a kid probably put me somewhere on the autistic spectrum
🤝Average Oblivion enjoyer
It wasn't oblivion that led you to autism; T'was autism that led you to Oblivion
@@AbelDuviant 😂
If feel like the skyrim one is more like “nice necklace. Lets get married…”
Skyrim dating: I dont gotta look nice, she's just digging my ice
dating in morrowind: go right up the stairs from the front door, NOT the upper door to the terrasse, then turn left at the top of the stairs and go down to the end of the street.
the girl at the end of the street: i don't know you, outlander, what do you want?
Alternative dating in Morrowind: Go to Sadrith Mora, turn left and buy yourself a slave gf for 500 septims.
@@LecherousLizard (6th house) based
@@EasyGameEhThe slave gf was an Argonian though
any minuses?@@LecherousLizard
@@dremoraa8220 Hm... no boobs, I guess?
In Skyrim it's like:
Do you want to get married?
Yes.
Ok, let's go to the wedding.
Then you get a hagraven wife.
I HAVE SEVERAL QUESTIONS
@@RaTcHeT302 theres a goat somewhere in there to
@@RaTcHeT302 long story short, and after watching a 4 hour lore video. Some dudes get freaky with hagravens. These are called hag husbands. The offspring of this pairing is likely the origin story of the Augur of Dunlain before he turned into pure magicka. He was a hagraven human hybrid, and as such a naturally gifted mage
“How wasted were we last night?”
Her name is Ysolda dude.
Keeps the flowers in his hand because they are his and he is a chad and knows it.
I didn't even noticed that ahahah
😂
"my flowers"
Meanwhile in Daggerfall, you just walk into your local Temple of Dibella
Dating in Skyrim usually involves beating the hell out of someone in a fist-fight then shaking hands.
Ah Uthgerd. A proper strong Nord woman.
@@Kaftan My ebony blade says otherwise
She Beat my ass
@@KeelahSelai161 She's my go to pick for the Boethia sacrifice
in skyrim is more like: I have the broom you asked to delivered from riften, wel bang ok?
😂
Dating in Skyrim: "Come to see Balimund perform miracles with steel, eh?"
I swear to God, Skyrim girls are the easiest in all of Nirn. Here are some of the actual conditions for them to accept marriage:
-Chop firewood for her
-Give her a single batch of frost salts
-Beat her in a brawl
-Give her 10 bear pelts
-Give her 20 grapes
-Hire her for 500 gold
just in time for valentines day
Perfect timing 👌
"Thanks for helping me, friend!"
*puts on Amulet of Mara*
"Impregnate me now."
RIZZ 100
It looks like Lady Mara has different policies for different places and times.
If that time travelling mothman from the late 4th/early 5th era can be trusted, love is central to the purpose of Nirn. Ah, I just remembered how depictions of the myths of Anu and Padhome fighting for Nirni occur in many Tamrielic cultures.
time travelling mothman? what are you talking about i gotta know
Ironic, since the only character one can romance in Morrowind was Ahnassi.
Sweet, sweet Ahnassi. As sweet as the finest moon sugar, more sultry than a bottle of Balmora Blue skooma. A very special friend for Khajiit...
Ahnassi is a good girl indeed :)
She is my very special friend.
Wow...how long do I have to play this game to meet her?
For all my playthroughs, I never knew about her. Huh.
@@EarlyMistyou can meet her the same day you arrive on Vvardenfel. You can find her in a tavern in Pelagiad. She'll give you a few quests and after each of them you will become closer friends. Eventually she'll give you the key of her house and you can use it as your own base. However be aware that only male characters will be able to get quests from her.
Something I just realized is how sad the font style looks from Morrowind to Skyrim.
What do you mean by that ?
@@UlvenTESThe Magic Font cards that Morrowind used was cool and stylish in appearance. Oblivion's Kingthings was great too. Noticed that in your title card in between bits. Skyrim uses Futura Condensed which looks so boring and sad in comparison.
Absolutely, man! It really *does* make me sad. Such a great reminder how Bethesda games got more and more soulless :/ Waiting for Comic Sans in TES6. Yay...
@@UlvenTESMorrowind's color palette is vibrant and alive while Skyrim's is duller
Skyrim usually has colors closer to gray and those that are not usually more opaque and "dirty" (obviously excluding nature) while Morrowind has a greater variety in its colors and these also tend to be more saturated giving them a bigger sense of being vibrant
Feel like skyrim should be star trek when they go to risa and the statues mean youre down to party
The Oblivion one could have fooled me if there was no video. Impressive, Bethesda really went for full real life imersion, too bad they went to the place for special kids as their main and only reference.
me, an oblivion player: "AWW Thats adorabl--- Speechcraft increased? Autism? Well thats not oblivion at all. The Red Ball Mod proves this
"We both got autism, haven't we?"
Yeah, that's pretty much the whole of Oblivion.
🤣
Oblivion seems to be pretty accurate to actual dating.
😂😂
The best part is the sounds of the items breaking with the physics in the Bannered Mare… every damn time
The girl arrives in Oblivion : It's you! Hi.
Oblivion moments are truly legendary, never gets old xD
I always figured Skyrim was more like Scout from "Expiration Date:"
"We both got buckets of chicken. You wanna do it?"
"Eh! Okay!"
Ah, morrowind. Probably the only place where you can date a cat.
Who is also a monk.
Working for thieves guild.
And it's a very, very good cat.
And everything goes nice until she mentions her ex.
Then you help the ex to drop his chem habits.
Then everything keeps going well and never goes wrong. In fact, you get bed and board out of it!
The only problem is, you have to pack the meat to get these benefits.
Anhassi 😂
The oblivion part is so relatable.
😉
Subscribed. This is exactly the kind of cross-IP meme content I need right now and for the foreseeable future.
Thank you so much ;) I'm happy you like it
Dating in Morrowind as a female character: “Kiss me on the mouth! I swear I’m not a bandit, that’s just what my haters say”
-❤ Nels Llendo
Nels is a giga chad
Her (a complete stranger): Hello. I see you are wearing an amulet of Mara. Want to get married?
Me: Please stop bothering me, I just started a new game and this is my only enchanted amulet.
I skip the “admire” part by slipping them a hundred. In game too.
Works too ahah
You've been on fire, my man
Ahahah thank you :)
"How can Ahnassi not see? Must she be blind? She sees you walk, and she likes what she sees. It is her profession, to see such things as the flow of the body, and the grace of the eye, and admire."
How the oblivion music fits omg!
Oblivio music always fits well because it's amazing
Skyrim marriage is in a way the ultimate real life simulator. All you get to do is talk about cooking, money and the kids, and be happy that you at least sleep in the same bed.
“So this is the blue palace”
“no that’s the bannered mare. The blue palace is in solitude”
Ahnassi will always be my special friend👀
Fucking legendary use of American Psycho!
Thank you :)
Morrowind is the intellectual girl and Skyrim is the fun one
you make absolute gold. awesome stuff
Thank you so much :))
I expected a slavery joke in "Dating in Morrowind" section. Since all the quest about buying a slave and making her look like a noblewoman for some old ashlander and stuff...
This would have been great indeed ;)
Oblivion: *[can't get a girlfriend]*
Skyrim: - _"Wanna get married?"_
- _"OK."_
Morrowind: *[goes to Sadrith Mora to buy an Argonian girlfriend for 500 septims]*
Ahahah or a fake telvanni noble
I think the Admire attempts may have Failed.
Not sure
poor ahnassi gets no reference :(
the skyrim part is a work of art
Thank you mister :)
Where does the Oblivion scene come from?
>meet some altmer girl in solitude
>Slags off my robes
>"Hey that's Thalmor robes you're slagging off"
>Wants me to wear a suit she made when I go see the jarl
>Jarl says it's cool
>Altmer girl down to dirty anytime
Wtf is wrong with people in Skyrim. I swear everyone has a permanent brain freeze.
The only Oblivion character I had/have attraction to is Cutter.
Help me.
Skyrim dating:
"Look, we ain't got time to shit around. You wanna get married or not?"
"Cool. Guess that means I love ya then."
*Procede to kidnapping.*
Picking up girls in Skyrim is not that easy but as soon as you get this giant toe everything is positive
lmao. "The blue palace"
😂
In Skyrim: oh hey you have an amulet and have done a quest that’s marriage material!
And then there is Ahnassi
Thought at first you were danish because of the channel name (Ulven means "the wolf" in danish). Can see you are located in the US though :D
And I'm French 😂 but yes my name comes from Danish:))
@@UlvenTESOh! The mystery deepens then :)
What's the yellow thing in the corner at 0:11?
Me trying to pause it 20 times
Heh skyrim just made me think of one of the valve official videos for teamfortress 2, the one where the scout has a bucket of chicken and then asks the girl beside him if she wants to do it. In skyrim the bucket of chicken is the amulet of mara.
Skyrim should have been that disney parody when they meet and instantly agree to get married.
The speechcraft skill increase hit me like a bus, had to rewind to catch the skyrim bit after I was done laughing
Ahahah
Skyrim:"Nice necklace, wanna get married?"
*Dating people in Skyrim*
“Hey, remember that time I dropped α pair of old boots on the ground and decided to let you keep them? Wanna get married?”
“Sure, why not.”
Yup ahahah
Actually in Skyrim it's more like, "Hey lady or gentleman, like the favor I did you? Now look, I'm wearing a specific religious necklace."
"YES, we met exactly one time before and you did exactly one thing for me, so let's absolutely get married in a country where there's no such thing as divorce and there is no legal way out!"
To be fair, if you don't like your spouse in Skyrim, all you need to do is wait like two weeks and they'll either get eaten by a dragon or get stabbed to death by one of the many varieties of shirtless homeless men.
@@PaxJurassicus I've never had that happen. I don't think those things spawn when you're away. Of course some players take a more hands-on approach to removing no-longer-wanted additions to their virtual lives. Not sure I can say it more directly without tripping Google's censorbot.
Speech increased. Killed me.
😂😂
Finally the actions of the NPCs makes perfect sense.
Getting married in skyrim is literally just about status. The game is rather based lol
We all knew what clip oblivion would be
i didn't but i wasn't disappointed
Morrowind one is extra accurate since Dunmer being as horny as Austin Powers is canon.
True, 100% canon 😎
Dark Elf women like bold and a little morbid
It is funny that in Morrowind there technically is a romance side quest.you can find.
The end killed me
i laughed so hard at the oblivion piece
Liz Hurley? Go back and have another look at Morrowind.
Oblivion: Autism
Morrowind: N'wah
Skyrim: Manly Man
Perfectly balanced as all things should be!
Yes! 😂
Blue Palace works so well OMG
The second one.. my sides, goodness
Ahahah
"sim querida"
you didnt need to even edit the oblivion scene. it looked like that already. the orignial looked just like oblivion.
The poor editing fits in perfect with oblivion, not that oblivion was bad, it was great in some ways better than Skyrim.
>morrowind
>dating girls
All that 101 in speech and you still have no bitshees.
Need to edit Autism Cat’s face on the oblivion guy please lol
Can someone tell me where that autism clip is from, originally?
The undatables - Michael and Alice
How come the effcts flicker? otherwise funny vids :P
My _spear_
😭🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣love this no that's the bannered mare
Funny enough, I just recently rewatched this Austin Powers movie after many years with a friends.
It didn't age too well, to my bit disappointment...
I don't know, I still love it ahah
Before I got mods in Skyrim, the only reason for me to use the idiot marriage system was to get an extra body to live in my house and help defend it. Since mods, I haven't even touched an Amulet of Mara. Fuck "relationships" in video games, and fuck people who think they're a good idea.
I got married in order to sell my items ahahha
Use dating system like in Grand Theft Auto to make a girl fall in love with you😂😂😂 I think that would be way different experience proven how good you are as a ladies man😂😂😂
spot on
This is so true
very accurate