Bert took tommy for a ride on this one. want a cigar "yes". want to smoke weed "yes". want to drink tequila "yes". 17 minutes in, tommy says "are we almost done yet?"
Spent the last month watching these in order and this is the best episode! I love their friendship and Bert being so happy, toms the only one that will probably ever FULLY understand him
@@chrisbouve846 eat the scrum. what’s it like being a man picking your favorite man like you’re picking your favorite backstreet boy? and do You know what’s a banana split ?
We watched one man try everything he could do to make his best friend laugh, knowing he’s probably going through a rough time. Burnt is an awesome friend we should all strive to be.
Dude that was one of the funniest things Tom has ever said on this podcast. He should take a couple hits from a joint during every episode from now on.
Bert: I can't believe he lives in a place where they have crocodiles in the water. Also Bert: from the only place on Earth that has both crocodiles and alligators.
Tim telling Brent "I love you too buddy" at the very end really hurt after knwoing top dog passed really gets me emotional. Saved this one. Only podcast ive ever saved.
@@acmdavid11 yeah he seemed like a really solid man too, Vietnam Veteran, good father and husband, funny guy when he was featured on the podcast many times, a big shame tbh!
See the change in Tim's face and how he's reacting when he's got a strong buzz going...its amazing! So funny. Bart seems no different than any other day. Lmao
This right here is why Bert is one of the greatest people of all time. I love him so much because of how purely happy he is. It’s so fun to watch him be 100% himself and to watch Tommy Bunz get high and just support all of Brent’s crazy ideas haha. Love you boys.
I am convinced Bert will drop dead at some point while laughing his ass off on this pod cast. His face looks like he is having an anaphylactic reaction at times. Love his commitment.
That commitment is about to make me quit listening. His high pitched wheeze is like having an ice pick shoved into my ears as he laughs at his himself.
I love the fact Tom has literally dealt with a adult sized toddler for 15 fucking years, hence why he is a great dad with proper age and size appropriate toddlers.
I just noticed this. The way Bert sort of storms ahead into a plan, and you see Tom about to say something and then he doesn't, and he decides to do the verbal equivalent of a pat on the head like "good job, buddy".
@@alexsouthey He learned to just "Hey Buddy" Bart in a different way from Top Dog. RIP Tom Senior. I hope he is truly on the Carnival Cruise ship in the skies right now.
I swear on everything i was rolling up a Joint as i started this episode and being able to smoke with bert has always been a wish and this is pretty dang close lol awesome
When you said “two bears racing” in my head I was picturing an old fashion foot race between Tom and Bert. The thought of that makes me laugh even harder.
I find it hysterical that Tom might as well be doing the podcast with a over excited goldfish how much Bert can switches conversations and topics within 10 seconds
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“I don’t have any rules in my brain”
Best quote of all time
Christian Walker????
I believe Burt Is creating a new category of Narcissist in front of our very eyes. But His Delusions have become incredibly entertaining.
It's nuts the level of narcissism that bert has developed in his lifetime.
You didn’t even get the quote right
Ya bro these wild and crazy guys bro they just bro out bro! No rules bro!
Bert: Let's do a racing movie with the Rock.
My brain: Fat & Furious
Fat & Fur-ious
My farts injurious
@Whatever The Case what? I don't understand your comment lol
@@biggiesmalls7939 They're saying the bears are furry.
Same exact thought
5 minutes in, Tom hits joint…
10 minutes later “Is the show almost over?”
I love that there was still an hour and a half left 🤣
had me rollin
😂😂😂 Tommy was so high
"At the same time, let's go- one, two, thr~"
"CRAYONS"
Such a nice opening with a joint
Whad you get Whad you get!?
@@AgendaInMind no ones reading this
@@AgendaInMind sir this is a Wendy's
I laughed way too hard at that
If Bert can do it, everyone can do it
This is the kind of ignorance humor produces 😂😂😂
I just got bud from bro bro I don’t think
I don’t think I could drink and smoke every day and survive as long as Bart has.
But good luck with it 😃
If Bert thinks he can fight a pack of wolves, so can I!
Only problem there is Birt can never do it
This episode made me so fuckin happy, the “I hope everyone’s having a good day” made my day so damn good
" ... right now there's some bad shit going on in the world"
This episode is starting out legendary
YESSS
36:00 WTF is he doing?!! Hahah, Im dyyyying
I lost it when Brent said “I would have totally got caught up in the crowd storming the capital”
😂
It's Always Sunny did this exact joke in one of their new episodes a couple weeks ago
100% Running up in the white house shirt off, joint, and beer in hand.
@@benjamin3290 I'm sure thousands of people have made this joke lol
@@codyyounger9737 Maybe. Maybe not. Haven’t seen it done in any other major show, so can you provide another example?
Bert took tommy for a ride on this one. want a cigar "yes". want to smoke weed "yes". want to drink tequila "yes". 17 minutes in, tommy says "are we almost done yet?"
I think Tommy let Bert steer more because (I’m guessing) Top Dog had just passed away at this point. I could be wrong obviously.
I was wondering about that as well. I hope Tom takes some time off
Wondering if they ever circle back to Favourite Cigar Memories haha
He needed this one though ❤️ loosing your pops is tough
Bert to the camera:
"Hey you pause this get high grab a beer"
Me at work:
-_-
Gotta “pack a lunch” next time😂🤟🏽
Vape pens in your car. Put the beer in your non see through water bottle. What is this amateur hour?
@@tkbikesnc6079 smoke a blunt behind the dumpster like a man
@@KZ_MMA-KZ not everyone works at Subway bro 😂
me working from home:
:)
The pure joy in Bert's face when he says "Let's light a cigar"is the level of happiness I strive for!
Whenever I think Bert has finally reached peak insanity, he gets more insane. It’s a beautiful thing to watch.
It’s pronounced “coolness”
Love it
"I have no rules in my brain"
I'm a fan of his delusional ideas and lack of self awareness that he's completely insane, it really is fun to watch.
“If the Rock can do it, I can do it.” -Bent Christmas
His confidence is a thing of beauty haha
This is the best version of his name I’ve seen
@@codenamesoup179 Just when you think you've seen em all there's always one more haha
🤡
Bent Christmas 😂😂😂😭
Bro this was too funny! 😂
Tom laughing at Bert not knowing how to correctly say "Grand Prix" 🤣😂🤣😂🤣 OH this episode is too much!!
Brent: "Ren-Alt" lol
Bert’s wife talks to him like a mom talks to a ‘special’ kid.
ahahhaha
All love 😂
He talks about his wife like she's his mom and he hates her
@UCHwSed3lRTlr6Dz8UvXaC4Q so is Bart
lmao
Bert: You wanna smoke weed?
Tom: Okay.
Bert: let’s smoke cigars, we’re already smoking weed.
Tom: Okay.
Bert: Let’s drink tequila we’re already high.
Tom: Okay.
Nice to see Tommy let his hair down
@@AgendaInMind Sir, this is a Wendy's.
@@ThatLongHairMetalGuy my greatest laugh 😂
Lets get high every episode.
Okay.
That sidnt happen but that muffled okay got me
Spent the last month watching these in order and this is the best episode! I love their friendship and Bert being so happy, toms the only one that will probably ever FULLY understand him
This is the Tim & Bart I needed today.
RIP Bob Saget.
I know I saw that too. R.I.P another legend.
RIP Toms Dad
@@adambailey5305 same person
@@RolandSpecialSauce Bob Saget, and Top Dog(toms dad) died. two different peeps
@@adambailey5305 have you ever seen them in the same room at the same time? Exactly
"This is best show we've ever done."
Couldn't agree more.
Listening to Bert come up with business ideas is like listening to Will Ferrell and John C Reilly dream about Prestige Worldwide
We do not see Tom get high often enough, this is hilarious.
Because Brent talks more somehow. I’d love to see Tom high more often without Burt unfortunately
So much funnier when he’s blitzed
@@chrisbouve846 eat the scrum. what’s it like being a man picking your favorite man like you’re picking your favorite backstreet boy? and do You know what’s a banana split ?
Uncomfortable*
@@digitalsalsas you okay?😂 I like Bert, he’s just way too much sometimes
“I thought we were still in a Chinese prison right now, did we leave?” I fucking love stoned Tom.
he puffed like 2 times from that Joint and is baked :D
@@yannikakapralli to his credit he did do a pretty heavy inhale on the first one 😂
@@yannikakapralli the the might be really high. Kevin Smith has weed that is over 50 percent so does snoop dogg
My man took two puffs and thought he was in CCP custody
Bert cheering up Tom is actually one of the sweetest things I've ever seen, stay strong two bears! You guys are lucky and blessed
Tom: April 16th
Bert: THAT’S BEFORE JULY!!!
This episode was an instant classic
I didn't get that bit, or did he mean for a tax dodge?
“You’re April 16th? HA I’m April 3rd!”
o yeah but not yet 😕 😒 😐 😑
“I’m doing a great podcast with my best friend!” ❤️ Such pure Bret
It’s 9am right now and bert saying “today is a great day” made me smile and gave me hope that today’s going to be a good day for me. Thanks guys!
"I'm high and I'm fuckin happy" I love the innocence of Bart
It’s fake. He’s a narcissist
@@chadgrov why do you even watch if all your comments are about how much you hate bert lol
@@emclovin6962 for Tim’s reactions to barf
Brunt’s a lot more tolerable when he’s high I’ll admit.
We watched one man try everything he could do to make his best friend laugh, knowing he’s probably going through a rough time. Burnt is an awesome friend we should all strive to be.
Yeah man, that's what I saw too.
Why is he going through a rough time? :(
Yeah what happened to Tom?
@@Vaser1013 Top Dog passed away 😞
@@garrettpandow2041 Nooooo :( RIP Thomas Nadeau Segura aka Top Dog
I can’t stop laughing at the idea of Brent with a few drinks in him and accidentally ending up blindly partying in the middle of the Capitol Riots
what the time stamp on this I lost it! too funny!
@@9newman7 54:16 lmao
🤣 can so see him lit AF in the middle of all of it
It's almost therapeutic watching 2 Bears Smoke 1 J.
Huff huff pass
I wish they’d get high on the show more often. Fucking hysterical
2 bears 1 J 💨💨
This could be taken as them killing Nadav for fun
i have been waiting 4 this my whole life
TOM BEING HIGH AND INTERRUPTING BERT IS SHCH A GOOD ADDITION. NOW ITS JUST RANDOM COMMENTS BACK AND FORTH
Bert will never get another woman as great as the one he’s got. Her calling to check in was adorable.
Stoned Tim - "Is the show almost over?" Normal Brent - "No, we've only done 15 minutes ". Hahahahahahahaha I'm crying. Lol
Dude that was one of the funniest things Tom has ever said on this podcast. He should take a couple hits from a joint during every episode from now on.
@@Smiley-Coyote I couldn't agree more! And his face when he said it. You can tell he was high AF! Lol. God bless the Bears. Hahahahaha
“whitney houston in the bath tub.. i mean whitney cummings”
HOLLLY SHIT lol I’m so glad bert caught himself with that one
I died laughing tho 😂
Ya, a freudian slip as they say
The panic in his eyes after he said that was so good
Pound for pound, maybe the best episode ever. Up with the Kool-Aid episode.
"some kid's fuckin snortin heroin just tryin to get through the day.... and here I am" may be one of my favorite Burnt Khyizzler quotes
Was working out while watching this and almost fainted of laughter.
Bert' "I lost my train of thought'" Tom just nods and smiles.
Bert: I can't believe he lives in a place where they have crocodiles in the water.
Also Bert: from the only place on Earth that has both crocodiles and alligators.
"Getting Shit Done on a Monday" should be a tshirt.
The way Brent hard laughs makes me think "this is it, he's about to have a heart attack"
Makes me think "is my front door squeaking?"
Given we've lost Bob Saget it would be a way to balance out the universe
Norm, Bob Saget; Bert may honestly be next haha
He was turning purple!
Brent has that Mickey Mantel gene so he's gonna live till 250 mabe 300 with modern day medical science
The best part of these is the laughter in the background. Gets me every time XD
Bret's confidence in Tom is admirable.
"What can they do that you can't?"
That's the kind of stuff that makes Burnt not totally unlikeable. That and he def does know how to get a room pumped up to have some fun
Bert's wife is an actual saint. Her and their kids at home just listening to Bert talk about how he's gonna start smoking bc "why not?"
what's the problem ?
Bert: “I like to celebrate my power”
That phone call from Barf's wife sure sounded like her checking if the coast is clear to get railed by the pool boy.
😆 🤣 😂!!!!!!
Her trainer. Bert already voiced his concern.
@@devekut2 your right, I forgot about him saying that. Lol that call just seemed kinda sus.
I got more of a "mom only calls when I'm high" kinda vibe originally, but I second this theory
"All I've done is workout!" Def going to rail the trainer now
Tom's high look to camera after Brent mentions kids in sierra leone is next level funny
Whenever Two Beats Racing is ready, I’ll be ready to film it all for you guys and make it look next level. Raise hell praise dale!
Ummm just checked your channel. This looks totally legit. 🔥
Sliding into the DMs! Also, I'm here for this!
You are deffinitly the man for the job
These two starting their podcast with a joint is like watching two kids play with knives something bad might happen but it's gonna be entertaining
nothing better than a kid getting stabbed am I right?!
@@cravensz woah dude, we don't do that here
@@kurt9364 but op said it’d b entertaining?? Why u comin at me little man
@@cravensz it was a lil joke implying you brought up the subject of stabbing kids and i was gettin onto u for it
@@kurt9364 oh teehee
Bert: We need to start a racing team
Bert 5 minutes later: I don't get why you like cars
It’s literally sitting right in front of them that Brent and Tim’s new brand needs to be two bears alcohol and cigars
Don't forget about the weed Eoin
Tim telling Brent "I love you too buddy" at the very end really hurt after knwoing top dog passed really gets me emotional. Saved this one. Only podcast ive ever saved.
I had been laughing so hard and when I heard that, it was like someone stuck a knife in my heart.
Who is top dog? An actual dog or a person? Feel silly asking lol
@@acmdavid11 Tom's father.
@@PyroPsycho95 holy shit that’s terrible
@@acmdavid11 yeah he seemed like a really solid man too, Vietnam Veteran, good father and husband, funny guy when he was featured on the podcast many times, a big shame tbh!
“You’re the one who speaks it!”
When Tom said “I don’t pay attention” I felt that 😂😂
@@AgendaInMind bro im just tryna read funny comments and laugh not become radicalized through youtube comments
@@emclovin6962 “I don’t pay attention” works here too 😂 TL;DR
Bert asking "you can drink in saunas?" was the funniest part for me as a finn...
Tim, 19 minutes in, looks like he might be too high, and decided the alcohol will bring him down a bit, and is finally just letting Bret lead him
Tom wearing that great SL,UT merch Christina got for him how perfect!
As someone from SL,UT this makes me very happy!
😂 I love that she got so much SL,UT gear, 801babyyyy
Easily one of my favorite episodes of all time! This was all over the place and it's exactly what I came here for.
Jesus Bert actually talks even more when he’s high….no one’s surprised
I didn’t think it was possible
Praying for the Segura Family. Love you Tommy!
When Bert says “Wolves are just dogs” I lost it 😂😂
High Tom looks at everything like he doesn’t understand what it is.
And he sounds exhausted only 15 minutes in lmao
And if you've ever been high enough, that's pretty much how it is.
LoL if you watched some of his old stand up he explain why he looks like that
i noticed that
“That’s a nice wallet man where’d you get that?” Had me rolling
Bert who literally grew up in Florida: "Can you believe they have crocodiles in their water in Australia!?"
"I bet Dave copies a lot of cool things we do, I guarantee he's brushing his teeth with soap right now." lmao
See the change in Tim's face and how he's reacting when he's got a strong buzz going...its amazing! So funny. Bart seems no different than any other day. Lmao
This right here is why Bert is one of the greatest people of all time. I love him so much because of how purely happy he is. It’s so fun to watch him be 100% himself and to watch Tommy Bunz get high and just support all of Brent’s crazy ideas haha. Love you boys.
“Straight up secret time?” *proceeds to tell sex stories about his wife on a podcast*
That's the joke. He named a special secret time
@@filthyfrank.5 no way really??? I was born yesterday so I’m not sure how jokes are told but I was being I think what’s called sarcastic.
@@keatonclark3017 lmao how was that sarcasm. Maybe you were born yesterday 🤷♂️
@@kwoni3337 listen here bud you better go feather it before I put a B.R sticker on your forehead
@@keatonclark3017 I'm always featherin it brother
I am convinced Bert will drop dead at some point while laughing his ass off on this pod cast. His face looks like he is having an anaphylactic reaction at times. Love his commitment.
If that were to happen, I know burt would want us to say “he wanted to go out like that”
That commitment is about to make me quit listening. His high pitched wheeze is like having an ice pick shoved into my ears as he laughs at his himself.
This is one of my favorite episodes hands-down
I love when tommy bunz is stoned. This is hilarious!
He should blaze more often. I like relaxed Tim better.
Especially loved 19:43 when he thanks Enny, so sweet and childlike 😄
Bert can’t breath from laughing so hard at himself…. Everyone waits patiently for him to finish
Hahahaha you win the internet today! 😂
He sounds like a balloon with a very tiny hole in it. Like the sound it makes when you pinch the leak and make it open and close lmao
His face and neck gets insanely red. It’s a little much lol
You guys definitely deserve an award for this episode... 100%!!!
Burnt and Tim getting stoned right outta the gate. Love it.
Bert "I want to see how far we can go, before REALLY getting there" Kreischer
The Edge Champ ladies and gentleman
Edging to Whitney bathtub vid 😂
Bert was almost in tears when Tom complimented his serve 🤣
Props to Enny for being the ultimate host
"Why don't we get fucked up all the time?" Tom's face to the camera at 6:14 is everything.
By far the most I’ve laughed in awhile.
Also the I love yous at the end was a true sign of friendship.
I love the fact Tom has literally dealt with a adult sized toddler for 15 fucking years, hence why he is a great dad with proper age and size appropriate toddlers.
I just noticed this. The way Bert sort of storms ahead into a plan, and you see Tom about to say something and then he doesn't, and he decides to do the verbal equivalent of a pat on the head like "good job, buddy".
@@alexsouthey He learned to just "Hey Buddy" Bart in a different way from Top Dog. RIP Tom Senior. I hope he is truly on the Carnival Cruise ship in the skies right now.
@@Cash5YR I completely agree.
RIP Top Dog. You don’t gotta watch for Wasspes anymore. Feather on brother
Ymh references aren't really appropriate for toms dad as they would be a cool guy. This is toms effin dad man.
@@Mike-om4tv it's crazy that u think your some kind of authority..
@@jon1930 these guys are the real keyboard warriors be careful😂
@@jordanfink9049 and you think you can control what people comment on a TH-cam video🤨
@@jordanfink9049 nobody expressed a thing other than their condolences for top dog stfu
It’s insane to me how Bert is still alive
10:48😂😂😂 toms look on his face had me dying
21:35 I thought I was about to watch Bert have a stroke
It was perfect. Bert's insanity was really apparent in this episode.
I swear on everything i was rolling up a Joint as i started this episode and being able to smoke with bert has always been a wish and this is pretty dang close lol awesome
"He supports me like a hostage" hahahahahahah this is a great episode.
Enny is the real MVP here! What a great pal
When you said “two bears racing” in my head I was picturing an old fashion foot race between Tom and Bert. The thought of that makes me laugh even harder.
Brett and Buns are my favorite comedians out there. Never an episode where I'm not laughing. Love you guys
It's 8:45am, I just started my workday, and Brent is insisting I light a joint and drink a beer for the party episode. Man, I got meetings today...
this episode is a certified hood classic
Agreed 😂
This is actually one of the best Podcast episodes that I've ever heard from any Podcast I've listened to
Y’all need to get Tom in one of Cleetus McFarland’s races.
Truth
Hell yeah! He should take a McLaren to the spectator drags and enter as Burnt Chrysler.
Absolutely! Put a Kool-Aid Man sticker on the side.
I find it hysterical that Tom might as well be doing the podcast with a over excited goldfish how much Bert can switches conversations and topics within 10 seconds
Tom moving was the worse thing to happen to Burt in his life. Its really starting to get hard to watch this.
dead ass no cap this is the BEST episode ever. came back to watch it again with the same cigar they got and a bit of rum
Bert: I want to get into ASMR
Couple weeks later
Bert: *laugh wheezes through a full episode*
🤣🤣
31 minutes in: "I don't think we've talked about anything yet" - Brent
"I don't even know what you just said" - Tom.
"I don't either" - Burnt
Elite comment on multiple levels,
If there's anything to learn from this show, it's this: "Wolves: they're just dogs."
Just no collars🤣
@@chugbudjoe69 Exactly!
Best episode so far and I haven't missed one yet.
I went from watching The Godfather to this and i must say i cried after realizing i just watched 2 masterpieces back to back. Thanks Bong Bears!
Im so lucky to be super hung over watching this, these two are awesome!
Great choice to play the voicemail! That screeching 30 second beep was a definite bonus to this episode.
Ol' T looking faded as fuck lol. It's funny how every episode is just Bart's therapy session to boost his ego lol.
Tom got that serial killer glare while bert is laughing to himself
Doesn’t help he got ashes in his eye hahahah