I believe the essence of being a good conversationalist is holding an honest belief that there is something interesting and something to learn from each and every person you meet. Thank you for the great video!
TH-cam is overflowing with "men's style" experts, who seriously think that being a "gentleman" is all about a certain clothing style... It's very refreshing to have you two focusing on the quintessential part of being a gentleman - manners. Cheers, Tom!
It's amazing to think that text and books from the 1800s are still relevant today. Listening is a lost art today, it is something I am working on myself.
I love Hugo and Sonya! They are doing a great job of adding style and class back to society. In a world that has become more crass as the years go by, we desperately needed people like them. They are the epitome of sophistication and class, without being arrogant or pompous. I so enjoy their videos. Thank you.
I plan to view this episode again and again. Such words of eloquent truth need to be ingrained in the mind until they permiate the soul. Hugo and Sonya continue to improve the world.
When I was younger, when there were gaps or long pauses in a conversation, I felt compelled to fill in the space. As I evolved, I realized that often what is not being said, is often more important than what is being said. Enjoyed both of your videos on the subject.
Hugo and Sonya , I am from Louisiana where we have deep tradition of politeness and hospitality. When I was young I took etiquette classes from my godmother. In those classes there is one lesson that stood out to me and I remember to this day. She said in this day and time we feel as if we must do something. If someone says something or something happens we must react and throw ourselves nd our opinion into whatever situation it is. But she always taught that the hardest thing in life to do is to do nothing when everyone around you expects you to do something. She did not mean to ignore people or don't give advice in a situation. But what she meant was to be cautious in the way that you react, in the way that you say things to people. Sometimes, it's better to do nothing or to say nothing so that you do not risk offending or upsetting or embarrassing someone else. She said when you master doing nothing then when you do something it carries much more weight and substance. I hope this little jewel helps you, it has been quite a challenge for myself, but I do think it guilds us to living a "more elegant life" as you say. Cheers!
Greetings, Hugo & Sonya. Since I have been watching your channel I have been learning so much. I have starting sharing Sartorial knowlege with my friends. My female friends had no idea that classic style was available to them. Showed them some photo's of Sonya, and they were stunned by how awesome, and elegant she looks. Also, I just received your book The Parisian Gentlemen from Amazon. It's magnificent! Thank you, for being such an inspiration. Not only, for me, and my friends. But the world. Cheers! From Ohio.
Thank you so much for your encouraging words sir. We are happy to read we've been useful and inspiring to you. Best wishes for the coming year. Hugo & Sonya
Fantastic duo of podcasts dealing with etiquette. In this daek and uncouth world it's wonderful to have the pair of you, like two bright candles offering guidance.
I am extremely thankful for the work you do and this channel. Thank you for a place of calm in a very stormy world and for helping change my perspective on so much.
Thank you for this video. For a young man like me, this was very inspiring and eye-opening. Pleasure to see you two being a good example of the points discussed as well
Your videos are always a pleasure to watch. All are excellent points with honest insight and reflection. I have found that a helpful tip to remember is, don't have a ready response until the other person has finished speaking. Responding (or having a retort) can spoil a conversation. The goal should be to continue the conversation. Not end it. Being prepared and eliminating possibilities for surprise ends a conversation before it has started.
So many people need to hear this podcast. Thank you so much. I own a old old book called my deportment. It’s a good guide though the customs are out of style with calling cards chaperoning much can be learned about proper social graces. I love your podcasts. I see this a a great teaching for everyone specially young people that need guidance. Thank you!
it`s just a treat, an honor to listen to your words and at the same time gain more class and elegance yourself. with your joy you show how wonderful and stylish life can be
please continue this series. From what I gather from part 1 & advice from dating or relationship experts basically, the way you describe being a gentleman even without the wardrobe (make the person feel at ease & comfortable, not being too much of an ass kisser). Apply the same principle of approaching women with more ease & increase chances of success (make her feel at ease & comfortable so you don't make her feel threatened, not pretty much worshipping her like a simp but just be your comfortable self)
As a former english teacher, I remember that I used to be way too shy to speak in front of a big audience, especially in the US. Don't know why but debating in a foreign language was tough but I learned a lot. Quick thoughts on that topic, omission is so useful and being humble is something lots of people unfortunately tend to forget. Quick question : could you please tell me where Sony's glasses come from ? Thanks in advance. Cheers !
I do regret not joining debate, and can imagine how debating must have taught you to 'think on your feet' (particularly in a different language)! My glasses are handcrafted at Maison Bonnet in Paris. Cheers ! ~Sonya
@@SARTORIALTALKS I remember attending debate classes and joining teams when I took my Master in Iowa. That gave me confidence in preparation to my oral presentation. I also learned how to listen which is as important as giving my personal opinion. Thanks for giving me the name of the brand of your glasses.
This was a wonderful conversation about conversation - Thank you! Let’s eschew Ready-to-Think & Ready-to-Say, but rather embrace Bespoke Thought & Bespoke Conversation - Curating our thoughts and Tailoring our words, not for our own ego but for the benefit of others, that they may not be pressured with what to think, but rather encouraged how to think.
Learning to not obsess in your mind over if and how people may perceive you is key. I'm not suggesting to throw all social convention to the wind, but practice becoming comfortable with yourself in relation to others and you will find that you will become more a interesting, empathic, honest, charismatic, open and relatable person, and so will other people.
Really like many of the pointers in this video! Just to add one point to the 'keeping your commitments' idea - I think it's a fantastic tip because the more strictly you keep your commitments, the more selective you become at making them. In other words, if you know you will have to keep a commitment, you will think twice about making it. This way, in time, you will build the habit of only making commitments that are highly important to you and you really want to keep. P. S. I think this was even more important in the past then today, because with no cell phones, if you made a commitment to meet someone somewhere and you did not go, you had no way to tell them. So they would probably wait for you for a while before leaving. This, at best, is rude because you're wasting their time, but, at worst, you can cause them serious worry because they would have no idea as to why you didn't show.
This American's favorite descriptive moniker for herself is OUTREE ! I love watching the looks on my fellow Americans faces. So fun! Thanks Sonya and Hugo - such a lovely conversation, as always!
Great video. So many important topics, but one close to home for me is the idea of knowing one's audience and not going too far into details. I will indulge a little when asked, but otherwise, "regular" people, or rather, standard conversation, does not care for the details of my oxford boots or double-vented peak lapel jacket in birdseye fabric. Don't bore people with your hobbies and passions, rather, find a way to express yourself in a colourful and succinct way. All the best to dear Sonya and Hugo. Keep healthy.
I should have added; it's good form to show interest in others. Asking them about their hobbies and interests, letting them take a "deep dive" will fill them with huge joy. You might also learn something! And, if they're also good with conversation, they may indeed ask you about that 7-fold tie... :)
@@MartinIrwin I'm really glad you added this. I believe you absolutely have the power to affect the person you are speaking with in such a way that he or she can retire from the evening feeling fabulous because of your efforts. So well put. ~S
I once met the ex Prime- Minister, John Major. I chatted with him for around ten minutes. He looked me in the eye, was so polite and listened. He made me feel as if what I was saying was the most important thing in the world ; an utter gentleman and yet all he did was look and listen.
Thank you very much. Many of the traits you have presented us could also be found in stoic philosophy. In my opinion style and stoicism go very well together.
@@SARTORIALTALKS wow a reply from SARTORIAL TALKS and Kirby Alison in one day ! , the 20's are going to be fantastic with these well mannered and elegant peers around, thank you.
I wonder if the song was 'Sweet Caroline.' Wonderful, insightful, and I was able to take down great notes for my own betterment. Thank you, Hugo and Sonya!
A superb treatment of an important subject today. And particularly salient at this particular time in my particular country(the US). Merci merci! May I recommend an op-ed in today's NYT written by Nicholas Kristof. I think that it's a little more than tangentially related.
I completely agree with the debate statement. Leave the arguing for debates and there is a fine distinction between discussing ideas and exchanging perspectives with arguing.
@@dylandevere5341 I agree--how many times have we witnessed "arguing within a social setting" as a recipe for disaster ? I remember when a party I hosted disbanded because of a heated argument about why someone's college football team lost earlier that day. I still can't believe that happened. ~S
Thank you for recommending this book, I found a free version online and started on the introduction. Its really good. It's quite timeless I think, as human nature doesn't change quickly. I may pick up a copy of your iterations of the Italian and Parisian Gentleman. When I visited Paris many moons ago, I didn't see many gentlemen, even in the nice areas. I was staying with a friend who works for air france in douziéme .. maybe not a nice place, I am not sure. I met some in regional France. Maybe it was chance and I was unlucky. I did encounter nice well dressed fellows in Florence.. Im guessing it was just a random thing.
Dear Jennifer, the 12th is not supposed to be a nice part of Paris, but the city is changing fast and this is the kind of area which will is improving. As for the elegant gentlemen, unfortunately you are right. The Italians are much more elegant than the French. It's in their blood. Cheers, Hugo
Thank you very much for replying and I apologise for not responding earlier. I have been viewing both your presentations again and I must admit I do tend to be boisterous in conversation and be quite excited about the topic but mostly, talking to my conversation partners. I adore finding how other people think and what they have to say. So I have been practicing refraining from my tendencies to mentally jump up and down on other people. I do appreciate both yours and Sonya’s discussions regarding these sorts of things. I find it incredibly helpful. I understand this channel you have is aimed at gentlemen. However, I wish do to be a gentlewoman. I’m a bit silly/goofy and child-like sometimes.. I am interested in many topics and do investigate many things in all sorts of arenas. I am enjoying your channel very much and I think it has made a mark on me. Thank you
I've seen just the beginning and I have to admit: what a lovely way to start - holding hands. 😘😘 to both of you. and I promise to keep on watching - bussies harald
Hugo and Sonya hello, having just found and watched a few of your sartorial talks recently I will sum up my experience watching them and just now "How to have Great Conversations part 2" as so "confortable", thank you, Walter
Sometimes, and referring to your older video on qualities of being a gentleman, you have to speak up for what you believe is right and that does not always mean quietly. I have found in taking that role, in spite of some immediate tensions, it was appreciated afterward by those too polite to say similar but wish they did.
I agree, though, on the receiving end its not pleasant but essential. I would like to think it comes from a caring aspect. Please have a lovely day Dragosavo.
While I do enjoy these podcast style episodes, I really miss Sonya's occasional solo talks. They were blissful to listen to. Please continue to work some in. Bless you.
I still think that in German public TV or in Channels like ARTE we still have the good debate culture. The pure business driven TV channels may be have to go for this more sensational and polarizing style, because it is not easy to earn money in the world of internet. So, we have you wonderful guys filling the gap - Thank you so much for your channel!
Dear Christian, I don't know German public TV (as I can't speak German). ARTE (which is, as you know, both French and German) is actually a good channel with nice documentaries and some good shows. I agree with you. All my best, Hugo
a lawyer friend once told me you never want to be the asshole in any discourse--as if there was a spectator that had to objectively make that determination. it's brief kind of american colloquial equivalent of saying (in convo especially) express yourself with dignity, geniality, patience, and even joy. being relaxed and just say what you need to say, what's pressing on you.
Hello Sonya, hello Hugo ! As always, thank you for your videos. You mentioned several times in the past that tall (and skinny) men should avoid pinstripe suits, but looking back at some photos of Gary Cooper recently, it looks like he used to wear some without looking too out of place. Is it because of his charisma or are there exceptions we can make ? Yours, Léo
From the television show “The Good Wife” “In my opinion” Judge Patrice Lessner (Ana Gasteyer) Exhibit: “Fleas” (Season 1, Episode 16) Do you recall this scene? Like many lawyers before him, Will Gardner was not warned of the rules of Lessner’s court. The Hon. Patrice Lessner insists that every lawyer in her courtroom follow an argument or statement with "in my opinion."
I believe the art of conversation was lost because people got comfortable with the idea of anonymity on the internet. Repetition creates habit, people could be rude and face no real life consequences. Honestly, I try to practice being polite as often as I can, but I admit, it can be difficult at times because other people either test your patience or polite conversation has become so rare that it is viewed as pretentious.
There are still people who can debate and converse well, and those are the kinds of people who make good friends. I admit they are especially rare here in America, however.
Excellent & elegant as usual, moreover i believe Sonya has the voice and the skills to read a book every week and could be a serious competitor to your famous french lady Hugo )))))))))))), love t you from Cairo.
These are all good and timeless books. I read a 1938 edition, of How to Win Friends and Influence People when I was in my late teens which is still relevant today, Another point . No one ever likes a Corrector .
Thanks Currie for your book reference, probably very interesting and highly relevant today (as many books from the past, now that we seem to re-discover them and to stop considering them "passé"). All our best wished for 2020. Cheers, Hugo & Sonya
Hello, I find that people don't have time because they don't make time. I love good conversation. Steady and slow, but them many people lack manners and even see them old old fashion. Goodness me we are going backwards
Agree Penny, the direction many people are taking favors harsh interactions over a civil discussion. Sad indeed and hoping we can do our small part to inspire others to do better. Sonya and Hugo
Cher Adrien, J'ai étudié le français pendant huit ans et mon niveau est A2. Je peux m'exprimer, mais j'ai encore besoin d'entraîner mon oreille pour comprendre les francophones rapides. Le pire, c'est la peur de se tromper! Cheers ! Sonya
I have a problem with that agreeing with someone is totally wrong with my point of use I like to use of discussion I don’t know why they think like that and why I think the way I think they have a drink some good whiskey and just keep going about it and see if I can learn anything or teach proof and honesty are very important to me I can’t sit around with a bunch of people that know that I’m saying something is totally wrong in agreeing with me that’s horrible to me
I know that video was posted a year ago, but I'm researching that question that I don't find. That is: How could I deal with others' rudeness? If someone can answer me, i hope the etiquette fairy can bless you. LoL Thanks a lot
Good show. Been subscribed for months. Probably over a year actually. Love the experimentations with new formats and content, but, "at a gathering"? I feel like your business has been impacted by COVID, like most, but your advice is for circumstances that people are advised to avoid for medical safety. How about a show on dressing gowns, robes, pajamas, slippers, eye masks, etc. People work from home now. Help everyone release their inner Hugh Hefner or Eva Gabor.
Dear Richard, this show has been recorded in August 2020 (hence my red face and open collar 😊) when France was deconfined before the second wave. And the article we refer to has been written by Sonya few years ago. Anyway, you're right about gathering being restricted theses last months, but we think there are still great lessons to learn for Mr Martine, especially considering the political ambience in the USA. All our best wishes to you and your family for 2021. Hugo & Sonya
He seems to be frightened to have his hair cut. He clearly thinks it is part of his personality and makes him look stylish and younger but the opposite is true.If you give advice you have to learn to take it.
Dear Peter, I can take any advice and I certainly consider yours. But I've been wearing long hair all my life and I like it a lot (sorry if you don't, but this is extremely subjective and as long as my beautiful wife loves it, I'll keep it like this). Cheers, Hugo
@@SARTORIALTALKS I am very grateful for your reply Hugo and I did not mean to be offensive, it was merely my view bearing in mind that in today's world shorter hair is the fashion, but, as you say, it is totally subjective, and what you prefer. My best wishes to you and your wife.
I love this couple. May the Lord bless you always.
Thanks for the love and God bless you ! ~Sonya & Hugo
I love you in secret
@@nicolaslevy that's creepy
Indeed Burberry Girl, aren’t they totally refreshing to watch and listen to!
Even in my 50's I believe one is never too old to learn these lessons of civility or to be reminded of them. Thank you, great talk.
You are very welcome Alex! Hugo & Sonya
I believe the essence of being a good conversationalist is holding an honest belief that there is something interesting and something to learn from each and every person you meet.
Thank you for the great video!
Beautiful comment, thank you. Hugo and Sonya
TH-cam is overflowing with "men's style" experts, who seriously think that being a "gentleman" is all about a certain clothing style... It's very refreshing to have you two focusing on the quintessential part of being a gentleman - manners. Cheers, Tom!
We truly appreciate the notice you give to our work. Thanks very much for the response. Hugo and Sonya
It's amazing to think that text and books from the 1800s are still relevant today.
Listening is a lost art today, it is something I am working on myself.
Yes Alexander, it is a lost art for sure and I am working on it myself as well. All my best, Hugo
I love Hugo and Sonya! They are doing a great job of adding style and class back to society. In a world that has become more crass as the years go by, we desperately needed people like them. They are the epitome of sophistication and class, without being arrogant or pompous. I so enjoy their videos. Thank you.
Thank you so much David for your kind words of encouragement. All our best wishes, Sonya & Hugo
Please, please continue with this beautiful teachings.
One of your best episodes, if not the best. This convesation was so engrossing
Thank you so much. We took a lot of pleasure recording it for sure! Best wishes for the new year. Hugo & Sonya
I plan to view this episode again and again. Such words of eloquent truth need to be ingrained in the mind until they permiate the soul.
Hugo and Sonya continue to improve the world.
Thank you so much William for your kind words of encouragement. All the best, Hugo & Sonya
When I was younger, when there were gaps or long pauses in a conversation, I felt compelled to fill in the space. As I evolved, I realized that often what is not being said, is often more important than what is being said. Enjoyed both of your videos on the subject.
Very wise words! Thanks a lot, Sonya & Hugo
@@SARTORIALTALKS It's always a pleasure to hear back from you. Hope you are both doing well!
Thank you for this extensive training! Even if one believes they know a lot about socializing, there is always more wisdom to be shared. 🥂
Thanks friend. Sonya
Hugo and Sonya , I am from Louisiana where we have deep tradition of politeness and hospitality. When I was young I took etiquette classes from my godmother. In those classes there is one lesson that stood out to me and I remember to this day. She said in this day and time we feel as if we must do something. If someone says something or something happens we must react and throw ourselves nd our opinion into whatever situation it is. But she always taught that the hardest thing in life to do is to do nothing when everyone around you expects you to do something. She did not mean to ignore people or don't give advice in a situation. But what she meant was to be cautious in the way that you react, in the way that you say things to people. Sometimes, it's better to do nothing or to say nothing so that you do not risk offending or upsetting or embarrassing someone else. She said when you master doing nothing then when you do something it carries much more weight and substance. I hope this little jewel helps you, it has been quite a challenge for myself, but I do think it guilds us to living a "more elegant life" as you say. Cheers!
What a beautiful story Joey. Thank you so much for sharing. Your godmother was a wise lady for sure. Cheers, Hugo & Sonya
I think I would like to have met your godmother, or, at least taken a few lessons from her xx
Both of you have changed my life. Thank you
My bel Mere is French, a true Parisian, and listening to Hugo and the French cadence makes me smile as it reminds me of her conversation style.
I would say that this clip comes perfectly in time.
Few things are as important these days as what is said here.
Wow, that's a statement! Thank you for your appreciation of our work. Cheers, Hugo & Sonya
Greetings, Hugo & Sonya. Since I have been watching your channel I have been learning so much. I have starting sharing Sartorial knowlege with my friends. My female friends had no idea that classic style was available to them. Showed them some photo's of Sonya, and they were stunned by how awesome, and elegant she looks. Also, I just received your book The Parisian Gentlemen from Amazon. It's magnificent! Thank you, for being such an inspiration. Not only, for me, and my friends. But the world. Cheers! From Ohio.
Thank you so much for your encouraging words sir. We are happy to read we've been useful and inspiring to you. Best wishes for the coming year. Hugo & Sonya
Fantastic duo of podcasts dealing with etiquette. In this daek and uncouth world it's wonderful to have the pair of you, like two bright candles offering guidance.
I am extremely thankful for the work you do and this channel. Thank you for a place of calm in a very stormy world and for helping change my perspective on so much.
You are very welcome and thank you for your kind words. Take care, Hugo & Sonya
Perfect conversation. Lots to learn here. I must read this book! Many thanks for sharing!
It's not an easy read Auguste, but entertaining and informative, nonetheless. Cheers ! Sonya
Thank you for this video. For a young man like me, this was very inspiring and eye-opening. Pleasure to see you two being a good example of the points discussed as well
Thank you kind sir for you comment and if by chance we inspire, then this is all we can ask. Hugo & Sonya
Your videos are always a pleasure to watch. All are excellent points with honest insight and reflection.
I have found that a helpful tip to remember is, don't have a ready response until the other person has finished speaking. Responding (or having a retort) can spoil a conversation. The goal should be to continue the conversation. Not end it.
Being prepared and eliminating possibilities for surprise ends a conversation before it has started.
Thank you Andy for sharing this thoughtful tip. All our best, Hugo & Sonya
So many people need to hear this podcast. Thank you so much. I own a old old book called my deportment. It’s a good guide though the customs are out of style with calling cards chaperoning much can be learned about proper social graces. I love your podcasts. I see this a a great teaching for everyone specially young people that need guidance. Thank you!
it`s just a treat, an honor to listen to your words and at the same time gain more class and elegance yourself. with your joy you show how wonderful and stylish life can be
please continue this series. From what I gather from part 1 & advice from dating or relationship experts basically, the way you describe being a gentleman even without the wardrobe (make the person feel at ease & comfortable, not being too much of an ass kisser). Apply the same principle of approaching women with more ease & increase chances of success (make her feel at ease & comfortable so you don't make her feel threatened, not pretty much worshipping her like a simp but just be your comfortable self)
Well, dating is not our subject here, but some rules may probably apply. We wish you a happy 2021. Hugo & Sonya
As a former english teacher, I remember that I used to be way too shy to speak in front of a big audience, especially in the US. Don't know why but debating in a foreign language was tough but I learned a lot. Quick thoughts on that topic, omission is so useful and being humble is something lots of people unfortunately tend to forget. Quick question : could you please tell me where Sony's glasses come from ? Thanks in advance. Cheers !
I do regret not joining debate, and can imagine how debating must have taught you to 'think on your feet' (particularly in a different language)! My glasses are handcrafted at Maison Bonnet in Paris. Cheers ! ~Sonya
@@SARTORIALTALKS I remember attending debate classes and joining teams when I took my Master in Iowa. That gave me confidence in preparation to my oral presentation. I also learned how to listen which is as important as giving my personal opinion. Thanks for giving me the name of the brand of your glasses.
The art of conversation is not lost because iam watching it alive and well in this video.
Fabulous point. Cheers ! Hugo and Sonya
This was a wonderful conversation about conversation - Thank you! Let’s eschew Ready-to-Think & Ready-to-Say, but rather embrace Bespoke Thought & Bespoke Conversation - Curating our thoughts and Tailoring our words, not for our own ego but for the benefit of others, that they may not be pressured with what to think, but rather encouraged how to think.
Where do I sign up? Thanks John ! Hugo
A great conversation on the subject of having great social interactions! As always, thanks!
You are very welcome Brian! Hugo & Sonya
Learning to not obsess in your mind over if and how people may perceive you is key. I'm not suggesting to throw all social convention to the wind, but practice becoming comfortable with yourself in relation to others and you will find that you will become more a interesting, empathic, honest, charismatic, open and relatable person, and so will other people.
Thank you for this valuable contribution to the... debate! Cheers, Hugo
Really like many of the pointers in this video!
Just to add one point to the 'keeping your commitments' idea - I think it's a fantastic tip because the more strictly you keep your commitments, the more selective you become at making them. In other words, if you know you will have to keep a commitment, you will think twice about making it. This way, in time, you will build the habit of only making commitments that are highly important to you and you really want to keep.
P. S. I think this was even more important in the past then today, because with no cell phones, if you made a commitment to meet someone somewhere and you did not go, you had no way to tell them. So they would probably wait for you for a while before leaving. This, at best, is rude because you're wasting their time, but, at worst, you can cause them serious worry because they would have no idea as to why you didn't show.
Been looking forward to this next episode. I'm never disappointed.
Thank you David for your kind words. Hugo & Sonya
This American's favorite descriptive moniker for herself is OUTREE ! I love watching the looks on my fellow Americans faces. So fun! Thanks Sonya and Hugo - such a lovely conversation, as always!
Haha, well why not ? Thank you and cheers from Bourgogne ! ~Sonya
Great video. So many important topics, but one close to home for me is the idea of knowing one's audience and not going too far into details. I will indulge a little when asked, but otherwise, "regular" people, or rather, standard conversation, does not care for the details of my oxford boots or double-vented peak lapel jacket in birdseye fabric. Don't bore people with your hobbies and passions, rather, find a way to express yourself in a colourful and succinct way. All the best to dear Sonya and Hugo. Keep healthy.
Ahaaaaa, just resonates. So funny. ~Sonya
I should have added; it's good form to show interest in others. Asking them about their hobbies and interests, letting them take a "deep dive" will fill them with huge joy. You might also learn something! And, if they're also good with conversation, they may indeed ask you about that 7-fold tie... :)
@@MartinIrwin I'm really glad you added this. I believe you absolutely have the power to affect the person you are speaking with in such a way that he or she can retire from the evening feeling fabulous because of your efforts. So well put. ~S
That was beautiful! Something to refer to again and again. Manners and etiquette are sadly lacking in today's society
Very happy you are pleased Greg ! Sonya & Hugo
Thank you so much Hugo and Sonya 👍🏻❤️👏🏻
You are very welcome Ryan. All our best wishes for 2021. Hugo & Sonya
@@SARTORIALTALKS you are both to kind and certainly here’s to a great 2021 for you both and all of your loved ones, kind regards Ryan.
I once met the ex Prime- Minister, John Major. I chatted with him for around ten minutes. He looked me in the eye, was so polite and listened. He made me feel as if what I was saying was the most important thing in the world ; an utter gentleman and yet all he did was look and listen.
How fascinating ! Thank you for sharing the story here ! ~Sonya
Lovely and as always , so accurate. Love videos when you are together....love you both...Tons!
Thank you so much Alexandros for your kind and encouraging words. Yours truly, Sonya & Hugo
Hugo, you already did a wardrobe tour, but what about Sonya? I would love to see her collection of suits and shoes.
Maybe one day my friend. I still have to convince her! Cheers, Hugo
I would second this - would be great to see!
This is refreshing, great podcast !
Many thanks Karim ! Hugo & Sonya
Regarding debates, and when I took debate class,we were forced to argue BOTH sides of any issue.
Clever, maybe I should have known this about debate class, but I did not! Thanks, ~Sonya
Thank you very much. Many of the traits you have presented us could also be found in stoic philosophy. In my opinion style and stoicism go very well together.
I’m in my 70s and still learning.
That's great! I think we should all learn until our last breath. All my best, Hugo
Beautiful discussion, as always.
Best wishes for the year ahead.
From the U.K.
Thank you sir. Best wishes to you! Hugo & Sonya
Love is the basis for all good things in the world. Cheers!
Cheers Davide! Hugo & Sonya
Wonderful, this is very helpful for a man from Scotland who easily finds rough unmasked ideas at hand. Thanks Hugo and Sonya well wishing.
Many thanks Allan. Happy new year and take care. Hugo & Sonya
@@SARTORIALTALKS wow a reply from SARTORIAL TALKS and Kirby Alison in one day ! , the 20's are going to be fantastic with these well mannered and elegant peers around, thank you.
love hearing your stories!
I wonder if the song was 'Sweet Caroline.' Wonderful, insightful, and I was able to take down great notes for my own betterment. Thank you, Hugo and Sonya!
We are so happy to read your comment Bruno. The song we speak about is a French song. All our best to you, Hugo & Sonya
“This is very outré” hahaha. Love it.
😂 😂 me too ! Cheers Michael! Hugo
A superb treatment of an important subject today. And particularly salient at this particular time in my particular country(the US). Merci merci! May I recommend an op-ed in today's NYT written by Nicholas Kristof. I think that it's a little more than tangentially related.
Thank you, Henry. Checking the Kristof piece, now. Cheers! ~Sonya
Excited to watch!!! Let you know my thoughts when I finish
I completely agree with the debate statement. Leave the arguing for debates and there is a fine distinction between discussing ideas and exchanging perspectives with arguing.
Thanks for being here (so quickly!), Dylan. ~Sonya
@@dylandevere5341 I agree--how many times have we witnessed "arguing within a social setting" as a recipe for disaster ? I remember when a party I hosted disbanded because of a heated argument about why someone's college football team lost earlier that day. I still can't believe that happened. ~S
"In my opinion" was an episode on the TV series "The Good Wife".
You are absolutely correct ! ~Sonya
you two are such beautiful stylish people. The Sophistication!!!! 🙌🏼
Thank you so much and cheers ! ~Sonya & Hugo
Thank you for recommending this book, I found a free version online and started on the introduction. Its really good. It's quite timeless I think, as human nature doesn't change quickly.
I may pick up a copy of your iterations of the Italian and Parisian Gentleman. When I visited Paris many moons ago, I didn't see many gentlemen, even in the nice areas. I was staying with a friend who works for air france in douziéme .. maybe not a nice place, I am not sure. I met some in regional France. Maybe it was chance and I was unlucky. I did encounter nice well dressed fellows in Florence.. Im guessing it was just a random thing.
Dear Jennifer, the 12th is not supposed to be a nice part of Paris, but the city is changing fast and this is the kind of area which will is improving. As for the elegant gentlemen, unfortunately you are right. The Italians are much more elegant than the French. It's in their blood. Cheers, Hugo
Thank you very much for replying and I apologise for not responding earlier. I have been viewing both your presentations again and I must admit I do tend to be boisterous in conversation and be quite excited about the topic but mostly, talking to my conversation partners. I adore finding how other people think and what they have to say. So I have been practicing refraining from my tendencies to mentally jump up and down on other people. I do appreciate both yours and Sonya’s discussions regarding these sorts of things. I find it incredibly helpful. I understand this channel you have is aimed at gentlemen. However, I wish do to be a gentlewoman. I’m a bit silly/goofy and child-like sometimes.. I am interested in many topics and do investigate many things in all sorts of arenas. I am enjoying your channel very much and I think it has made a mark on me. Thank you
What's the name of this book?
oh you two should do readings. would be amazing.
Thanks Danielle. Not sure we have the time for this though 😩. Happy new year, Hugo & Sonya
Never miss an espoide! Sorry to hear that some bespoke stores have closed on saville row! So sad!
Thanks Dusty. Yes it is sad indeed. Cheers my friend, Hugo
I've seen just the beginning and I have to admit: what a lovely way to start - holding hands. 😘😘 to both of you. and I promise to keep on watching - bussies harald
Thank you Harald for your kind words. All our best wishes for 2021. Hugo & Sonya
Hugo and Sonya hello, having just found and watched a few of your sartorial talks recently I will sum up my experience watching them and just now "How to have Great Conversations part 2" as so "confortable", thank you, Walter
@@walterdnistransky5282 You are very welcome Walter. Best wishes for 2021, Hugo and Sonya
Sometimes, and referring to your older video on qualities of being a gentleman, you have to speak up for what you believe is right and that does not always mean quietly. I have found in taking that role, in spite of some immediate tensions, it was appreciated afterward by those too polite to say similar but wish they did.
I agree with you my friend. The truth can hurt at first, but is always better in the long run. Cheers, Hugo
I agree, though, on the receiving end its not pleasant but essential. I would like to think it comes from a caring aspect. Please have a lovely day Dragosavo.
While I do enjoy these podcast style episodes, I really miss Sonya's occasional solo talks. They were blissful to listen to. Please continue to work some in. Bless you.
Wow Elliot, it's lovely to receive your comment and I am touched ! Thanks a lot. Sonya
I still think that in German public TV or in Channels like ARTE we still have the good debate culture. The pure business driven TV channels may be have to go for this more sensational and polarizing style, because it is not easy to earn money in the world of internet. So, we have you wonderful guys filling the gap - Thank you so much for your channel!
Dear Christian, I don't know German public TV (as I can't speak German). ARTE (which is, as you know, both French and German) is actually a good channel with nice documentaries and some good shows. I agree with you. All my best, Hugo
Wonderful advice
Thanks for sharing,please upload more video about "being the real gentle man"
Love from india.👍
Thank you sir and best wishes to you for this year. Hugo
a lawyer friend once told me you never want to be the asshole in any discourse--as if there was a spectator that had to objectively make that determination. it's brief kind of american colloquial equivalent of saying (in convo especially) express yourself with dignity, geniality, patience, and even joy. being relaxed and just say what you need to say, what's pressing on you.
Many thanks Tim ! Hugo & Sonya
Brilliant. Can you provide references for the sources quoted?
Thanks very much.
Thanks. The main source is "Martine's Handbook of Etiquette, and Guide to True Politeness" (1866). All the best, Hugo & Sonya
@@SARTORIALTALKS Thank you again.
Hello Sonya, hello Hugo !
As always, thank you for your videos.
You mentioned several times in the past that tall (and skinny) men should avoid pinstripe suits, but looking back at some photos of Gary Cooper recently, it looks like he used to wear some without looking too out of place.
Is it because of his charisma or are there exceptions we can make ?
Yours,
Léo
Hi Leo, I think tall "non-skinny" men can wear pinstripes well. Yet if a man is (very) thin, stripes could accentuate his slenderness. Cheers, ~Sonya
@@SARTORIALTALKS Thank you so much for your kind answer, you have cleared a doubt in my mind !
Yours,
Léo
Pure Gold
I have a lot to learn from this conversation. Can anyone give me the link of article in discussion?
From the television show “The Good Wife” “In my opinion” Judge Patrice Lessner (Ana Gasteyer)
Exhibit: “Fleas” (Season 1, Episode 16)
Do you recall this scene? Like many lawyers before him, Will Gardner was not warned of the rules of Lessner’s court. The Hon. Patrice Lessner insists that every lawyer in her courtroom follow an argument or statement with "in my opinion."
Yes!!! You're right, it's from "The Good Wife" which is a TV series and not a movie as we said in the show. Thank you Ildiko! Cheers, Hugo & Sonya
I cannot find Sonya's blog. Would you mind providing the link? I would love to read them.
It's an old retired blog but remnants may still be around : "IconicallyRare". Kind of you ! Sonya
What' s the name of this bar mentioned at 25 minutes please?
What is the book that is mentioned? Is it available to buy online?
you guys are just so classy
I believe the art of conversation was lost because people got comfortable with the idea of anonymity on the internet. Repetition creates habit, people could be rude and face no real life consequences. Honestly, I try to practice being polite as often as I can, but I admit, it can be difficult at times because other people either test your patience or polite conversation has become so rare that it is viewed as pretentious.
Great point about the correlation between anonymity and rudeness. I wish I'd thought of it. Cheers ! ~Sonya
There are still people who can debate and converse well, and those are the kinds of people who make good friends. I admit they are especially rare here in America, however.
I am 4 months too late to this video, can you please let me know what literature you are reading off of. Is it a book?
Excellent & elegant as usual, moreover i believe Sonya has the voice and the skills to read a book every week and could be a serious competitor to your famous french lady Hugo )))))))))))), love t you from Cairo.
Thank you Nader and happy new year to you! Hugo & Sonya
@@SARTORIALTALKS Thank you , and happy new year to both of you my friends.
The part 2!
You are right ! ~S
These are all good and timeless books. I read a 1938 edition, of How to Win Friends and Influence People when I was in my late teens which is still relevant today,
Another point . No one ever likes a Corrector .
Thanks Currie for your book reference, probably very interesting and highly relevant today (as many books from the past, now that we seem to re-discover them and to stop considering them "passé"). All our best wished for 2020. Cheers, Hugo & Sonya
Hello, I find that people don't have time because they don't make time. I love good conversation. Steady and slow, but them many people lack manners and even see them old old fashion. Goodness me we are going backwards
Agree Penny, the direction many people are taking favors harsh interactions over a civil discussion. Sad indeed and hoping we can do our small part to inspire others to do better. Sonya and Hugo
JUST LIVELY.....Joseph
Does Sonya speak french ? I haven't seen her yet on the frech channel
Cher Adrien, J'ai étudié le français pendant huit ans et mon niveau est A2. Je peux m'exprimer, mais j'ai encore besoin d'entraîner mon oreille pour comprendre les francophones rapides. Le pire, c'est la peur de se tromper! Cheers ! Sonya
@@SARTORIALTALKS Merci, je suis plus actif sur l'autre chaîne, j'ai hâte de vous y voir !
Sonya looking lovely as always
I concur that for sure! Hugo
I have a problem with that agreeing with someone is totally wrong with my point of use I like to use of discussion I don’t know why they think like that and why I think the way I think they have a drink some good whiskey and just keep going about it and see if I can learn anything or teach proof and honesty are very important to me I can’t sit around with a bunch of people that know that I’m saying something is totally wrong in agreeing with me that’s horrible to me
I know that video was posted a year ago, but I'm researching that question that I don't find. That is:
How could I deal with others' rudeness?
If someone can answer me, i hope the etiquette fairy can bless you. LoL
Thanks a lot
I believe silence and the blank face my hold the most power, in my experience. Cheers to you ! ~Sonya
LON in upper Manhattan on Marble HILL in the 1990's..........But many people became lazy and it came to a halt after 2 years. More info later
OH NOOOO SECOND BUMMER :))
Still super fast ! ~S
I AM THE FIRST ONE THIS TIME YAAAAY FINALLY
Bravo !
Good show. Been subscribed for months. Probably over a year actually. Love the experimentations with new formats and content, but, "at a gathering"?
I feel like your business has been impacted by COVID, like most, but your advice is for circumstances that people are advised to avoid for medical safety.
How about a show on dressing gowns, robes, pajamas, slippers, eye masks, etc. People work from home now. Help everyone release their inner Hugh Hefner or Eva Gabor.
Dear Richard, this show has been recorded in August 2020 (hence my red face and open collar 😊) when France was deconfined before the second wave. And the article we refer to has been written by Sonya few years ago. Anyway, you're right about gathering being restricted theses last months, but we think there are still great lessons to learn for Mr Martine, especially considering the political ambience in the USA. All our best wishes to you and your family for 2021. Hugo & Sonya
Ce que vous dites à l'air tellement intéressant mais je comprend qu'un mot sur 2 😭
Nous avons pour projet de sous-titrer quelques épisodes, dont peut-être celui-ci. Amicalement, Hugo
You have fantastic Fashions
Many thanks Derrick. Hugo & Sonya
Greetings from pakistan
Greetings from Bourgogne, Shahab ! ~Sonya & Hugo
HEY! Why do you single out New York politicians as being corrupt?! Oh wait... Never mind. 😊
😂 we were just quoting the book from Arthur Martine ! Cheers Alex! Hugo & Sonya
@@SARTORIALTALKS As a native New Yorker I have been bred for sarcasm, my apologies it's a NY cultural thing.
He seems to be frightened to have his hair cut. He clearly thinks it is part of his personality and makes him look stylish and younger but the opposite is true.If you give advice you have to learn to take it.
Dear Peter, I can take any advice and I certainly consider yours. But I've been wearing long hair all my life and I like it a lot (sorry if you don't, but this is extremely subjective and as long as my beautiful wife loves it, I'll keep it like this). Cheers, Hugo
@@SARTORIALTALKS I am very grateful for your reply Hugo and I did not mean to be offensive, it was merely my view bearing in mind that in today's world shorter hair is the fashion, but, as you say, it is totally subjective, and what you prefer. My best wishes to you and your wife.