The abrupt way in which I was dismissed, discarded and abandoned left a memory that haunts me every day. The ensuing smear campaign, and other forms of abuse that followed were sooo painful to go through…. to them it’s a game….to us, It almost feels like it’s life-threatening…..🤯
One thing I noticed about these people, if you look closely at them at times, you should notice this angry look in them, sometimes deep sadness and dispair - they're actually deeply unhappy inside, and don't know what to do about it, just end up developing these habits, even tactics over time because it gives them a quick fix, respite from the pain and frustration - supply.
@@dcikaruga Yes, impartially observing their general movements, manifestations, tone of voice, etc. can give us a lot of information…. I actually started doing that a few months ago and what I saw, was, after I was able to digest the horror show, alarming and disgusting..
@@peterknyk1942 True, certain behaviours and how they react at times gives them away, but you generally don't notice it until you get more involved with them. But before then, I've always noticed that look on their faces, they can smile for the cameras and try to be a 'nice person', especially when they want something, but every now and then..... That look can be spotted quite easily, normal people don't give that look unless they're highly stressed or angry, but that's situational mostly, they're like that when there really isn't a reason because it's deep inside them.
Rise above the noise. Easier said, I know..the only opinion you should care about is how you view yourself. They literally have zero substance. Self love. ❤
Being with my ex narc for the past 8 yrs. made me observe this very pattern. I think they wanted to feel very important in a way that is disturbing. Instead of building trust with their intimate partners, they destroy the trust that they built with you (in that case lying when they tried to put you in their pedestal). Once they have a committed partner, they can’t stand being loved authentically by one person. Instead they go on and prey on other women that is susceptible to their love bombing. My ex narc was a compulsive pursuer in a relationship. He would go back and forth to the women he were involved before or try to meet women in complicated situation so that going public isn’t an option while having you as their main supply. In the end they destroy the very person that loved them. They are like toddlers testing your love for them. Showing and telling them you love them isn’t enough, they will cheat on your face to make you feel inadequate even if you are more than they deserve. They want to test your love for them so they keep hurting you and when you have enough of their abuse, you leave. Then they tell you, ‘you never loved me because you abandon me’. Well in fact it’s their actions and narcissistic behavior that made you leave or in other cases they discard you and will give silly reasons of the discard. Mine would use, ‘she’s crazy’, ‘she’s a nega-star’, ‘she insults me’, ‘she cheated on me’ et al. So with this pattern of infidelities and emotional abuse (who knows what else) it’s better to walk away. I did walk away and is now rebuilding my life with our daughter. We are struggling financially because I’m not earning enough to provide for my daughter but now we get to laugh and bring with us sunshine every day. No lies, no abuse and no fake love. We only live once, forgive yourself and move forward but never forget the lesson that narc abuse taught you. That is to respect yourself to walk away from what’s hurting and destroying you. That you deserve a life of solitude, happiness and love. Hugs*** :) Additionally I hired a private detective Metaspyhub@gmail. com. Once I knew what the narc was up to, it got easier to get over that lying, cheating, sack of doo doo, loser. I didn’t need closure from the narc, I paid for it. Best money I EVER spent!
The abrupt way they discard you is absolutely heart less. Then again we all knew they had very low empathy right? So why are we so surprised? They are horrible at communicating in general. I had broke up with the narcissist because of his behavior, he reached out two weeks later with a txt, telling me that he missed me and he wants to be with me. I did ask him if he was over what he was mad about. He said yes. (crazy nonsense stuff) so the next day and for about two more weeks we were seeing each other again. Things seemed fine, but he did once again bring up things from the past and start obsessing over things that mean nothing, but he was affectionate and happy for the most part. He then ghost me two days after seeing him and telling me how much he wants to be with me and missing me when am not with him. I was definitely surprised but I should not be. I txt him once asking what’s going on, I did not call. He ignored me. I let him be. It hurt like hell. But I need to remember all the times he would start a fight break up with me then txt me like nothing happened. But this time was it for me. I should have never let him back in after I broke up with him. I also think they know we are onto them and the games they play and it gets to a point where it’s too stressful for them to deal with the drama they cause. They move on to new supply.. like how innocent we were to these narcissistic when we first met them. We adored them not knowing what they were gonna put us through. When dating narc I even remember him saying he will miss this part in our relationship.. I was confused.. I said what part? He was talking about the love bombing part. He said we will never get it back. I later found out narcissist miss this in a relationship and will go out to cheat to get this new love bombing feeling back. Remember if they can disappear on you like this think about if you had actual real problems what would they do?? Exactly they are insecure cowards. They treat you like nothing then become nothing to them. I know the day will come he reaches out, he is not blocked. I can’t wait..to shut him down.
Amazing video A month ago, my partnership of five years came to an end. The choice to break up with the person I love is something that really gets to me. Even though it's all for nothing, I've done everything I can to get him back, and I couldn't imagine my existence without him. I've tried everything to stop thinking about him, but I still can't help but miss him and think about him often. I don't know why I am saying this here.
Saying goodbye to someone you love is difficult; I know this from my 12-year relationship ending. But I was unable to simply let him go, so I made every effort to get him back. I eventually sought aid from a spiritual counselor, who was able to help me regain his affection.
I just sought him up online thanks to your helpful information. remarkable I just checked Father Obah Eze online, and he's really genuine. Thank you again ❤
It’s crazy … I caught onto these patterns very soon.. after being hovered after 7 years…. But over the 7 years we broke up , I worked on myself completely and developed a strong sense of self awareness and emotional intelligence… “thank god” … so when the relationship started I saw right thru her bullshit and was able to leave before I was discarded…. Crazy they’ll go to the bottom of leaving a “voicemail “ saying stuff like ima try again.. blah blah blah.. like no it’s over I ended it I know ur setting a stage for the future and I’m not falling for it no more… ur channel helped me so much identify love vs addiction… without that distinction I’d still be stuck…. Thank u so much 5 months outa this relationship still think of her once and a while but it dosent take over my head as much as unit use to… be strong people , this type of dynamic will teach u how to truly be emotional intelligent .. take that and run with it..
So even men can be abused and the damage can be detrimental and long lasting on top of my ptsd & trauma injuries but I’m doing ok & standing up ! 🙏🏼👨🏻🚒
After 3 years I was discarded by my partner. Within a week she is back with her ex. She claims she is the happiest she has ever been. The same thing she told me when we first got together. It's been just over 2 months. Now they are engaged. She has blocked me on everything. I don't think she is watching me or wanting to hoover me later. She seems happy. She is telling people I raised my hand to her. Which I never did. The only way she could contact me now is through mutual friends. Because i blocked her on everything.
So glad you said all this my friends who have had for most of my life know my character and could see it now that I’m finally out I can see it unfortunately she is. My ex-wife is abusing my 23 year old daughter in the same way and I can’t, financially take care of us at this point having to retire from my firefighter paramedic position with PTSD and I think most of it was exacerbated by my ex narcissist tendency thank God, my friends are supporting me!🙏🏼👨🏻🚒
Don't, it's just a feeling, a sensation, but it should fade with time. You need to understand that it's just an illusion, it's not reality, it just feels like it, the truth was a lie all the time, you were taken for a ride. Its like some sleazy salesman cheated you out of your money, and you still want the product, or at least your money back - sadly, forget it, and whatever you do, don't go back because they're just try to cheat you again, they can't help it even.
@@IoanaGheorghe-rj1de Been through the same thing! Sometimes I believed she might change, but then I saw more and realized that was not possible… that as much as I tried to convince myself that going back would be OK it eventually was clear that going back would only make everything resurface….ppl kept telling me to let her go….
I meet that person after my dad died, my pets died, my mom has dementia and I care for her. Was like we were soul mates, like brain wash me. Left me blaming all on me, and calling me names, effectively destroy me, knowing I care for a sick person, and I barely survive day by day. Used all I told her against me, I am still stunned, still belive is a bad dream, and waiting for my friend to come back.
He did nothing but complain about all his past girlfriends for the first 3 months I went out with him, HUGE RED FLAG ladies. Now if I hear a guy complaining about his ex I am out of there.
I was discarded 12 days ago with absolute zero arguments, just a simple block on social media and messenger. Although I found out that he has a temporary new supply for the week. I just want this guy back 😢 feeling helpless & like a failure.
I recently text my ex about our dog passing, because I’m a good person. He went into “ I will never have another dog because of her” I said nothing back then he asked me “how is life in Boise”, I said nothing. I can’t do it, it is so obvious to me his narcissistic personality.
@@ging-a-roo2429 I tried sending you this earlier, but I’m not sure if it went through! Anyway, after my kitty died, I at least hope that she would say something but, she said nothing…. And she knew this kitty and that this kitty was very special to me….. oh well, I shouldn’t have expected anything else….
I'm 4 years in sutch situation (marriage...) even divorce happend after 3 years. But still no answers explanation. Shock from all situation is : she was nicest person. Gorgeous woman ( like you ), well educated inteligent. So..?
Thank you for this video ! Mine asked me to move in and our child to just tell me over text to move out 6 weeks after I moved everything in. He blocked me and I’m left wondering .
The question is simple.Ok is hard for everyone to leave us and kicking us like a a piece of garbage.But you need this person?Will this person make your life better?This person has value for you?
I have a question , narcissist woman broke up with me month ago . Went immediately no contact , she reached out couple time to keep control , I told her to leave me alone , don’t wanna be friend . Last reached out , she asked how I was , I said feeling better and she said she was being in pain and playing victim . I answered that I’m sorry for her . Next step : she pulled out an old supply and provocated a reaction from me but didn’t give her . Now started a mix signal between hot for the new supply and mad of losing control . What is real ? Mad at me or hot for him ?
It's been 6 months she discarded me but she didn't message me till now coz my parents told her truth to her dad. She discarded me without any closure. I was so in love with her.
Are they stupid? Actually, I know they are, but would you say they're at least far-sighted even to realize the harm that they cause? I feel they don't realize it actually, doesn't even cross their mind, and could care less. But when you look at it more closely, you have to be in a lot of pain, even frustrated, yourself in order to put another person through it.
Does anyone know why a female narc will say they burned the gifts they receive from you then later say they kept everything?...is it cos they can't throw away gifts as it was attention ? Plz help
I discarded him, this time.He said now were even and one day I will realise that he wasn't playing games. And this time he didn't blocked me (yet) What does this even means?
@@moniq1553 trying to figure out or understand what a narcissist is up to is mind-boggling, so none of it makes sense, or as my sister says, most of what comes out of their mouth is “word salad“!
He is leaving communication avenues open hoping you will reach out and “ reverse Hoover” yourself. Just like we can reverse discard we can also reverse Hoover ourselves.Ask me how I know 🤦🏽♀️
Hold up there . Completely Normal . Well then if ‘normal’ Is a social construct and common sense disappeared . What are we doing looking for love ? After all it’s a shared experience . Stay beautiful girls and guys be delightful .
The abrupt way in which I was dismissed, discarded and abandoned left a memory that haunts me every day. The ensuing smear campaign, and other forms of abuse that followed were sooo painful to go through…. to them it’s a game….to us, It almost feels like it’s life-threatening…..🤯
One thing I noticed about these people, if you look closely at them at times, you should notice this angry look in them, sometimes deep sadness and dispair - they're actually deeply unhappy inside, and don't know what to do about it, just end up developing these habits, even tactics over time because it gives them a quick fix, respite from the pain and frustration - supply.
@@dcikaruga Yes, impartially observing their general movements, manifestations, tone of voice, etc. can give us a lot of information…. I actually started doing that a few months ago and what I saw, was, after I was able to digest the horror show, alarming and disgusting..
@@peterknyk1942 True, certain behaviours and how they react at times gives them away, but you generally don't notice it until you get more involved with them.
But before then, I've always noticed that look on their faces, they can smile for the cameras and try to be a 'nice person', especially when they want something, but every now and then..... That look can be spotted quite easily, normal people don't give that look unless they're highly stressed or angry, but that's situational mostly, they're like that when there really isn't a reason because it's deep inside them.
@@dcikaruga chameleons!
Rise above the noise. Easier said, I know..the only opinion you should care about is how you view yourself. They literally have zero substance. Self love. ❤
And too this shall pass, grow an thrive...and live your best life... Shine bright 😎 💯💯💯
Being with my ex narc for the past 8 yrs. made me observe this very pattern. I think they wanted to feel very important in a way that is disturbing. Instead of building trust with their intimate partners, they destroy the trust that they built with you (in that case lying when they tried to put you in their pedestal). Once they have a committed partner, they can’t stand being loved authentically by one person. Instead they go on and prey on other women that is susceptible to their love bombing.
My ex narc was a compulsive pursuer in a relationship. He would go back and forth to the women he were involved before or try to meet women in complicated situation so that going public isn’t an option while having you as their main supply. In the end they destroy the very person that loved them. They are like toddlers testing your love for them. Showing and telling them you love them isn’t enough, they will cheat on your face to make you feel inadequate even if you are more than they deserve. They want to test your love for them so they keep hurting you and when you have enough of their abuse, you leave. Then they tell you, ‘you never loved me because you abandon me’.
Well in fact it’s their actions and narcissistic behavior that made you leave or in other cases they discard you and will give silly reasons of the discard. Mine would use, ‘she’s crazy’, ‘she’s a nega-star’, ‘she insults me’, ‘she cheated on me’ et al. So with this pattern of infidelities and emotional abuse (who knows what else) it’s better to walk away. I did walk away and is now rebuilding my life with our daughter. We are struggling financially because I’m not earning enough to provide for my daughter but now we get to laugh and bring with us sunshine every day. No lies, no abuse and no fake love. We only live once, forgive yourself and move forward but never forget the lesson that narc abuse taught you. That is to respect yourself to walk away from what’s hurting and destroying you. That you deserve a life of solitude, happiness and love. Hugs*** :)
Additionally I hired a private detective Metaspyhub@gmail. com. Once I knew what the narc was up to, it got easier to get over that lying, cheating, sack of doo doo, loser. I didn’t need closure from the narc, I paid for it. Best money I EVER spent!
The abrupt way they discard you is absolutely heart less. Then again we all knew they had very low empathy right? So why are we so surprised? They are horrible at communicating in general. I had broke up with the narcissist because of his behavior, he reached out two weeks later with a txt, telling me that he missed me and he wants to be with me. I did ask him if he was over what he was mad about. He said yes. (crazy nonsense stuff) so the next day and for about two more weeks we were seeing each other again. Things seemed fine, but he did once again bring up things from the past and start obsessing over things that mean nothing, but he was affectionate and happy for the most part. He then ghost me two days after seeing him and telling me how much he wants to be with me and missing me when am not with him. I was definitely surprised but I should not be. I txt him once asking what’s going on, I did not call. He ignored me. I let him be. It hurt like hell. But I need to remember all the times he would start a fight break up with me then txt me like nothing happened. But this time was it for me. I should have never let him back in after I broke up with him. I also think they know we are onto them and the games they play and it gets to a point where it’s too stressful for them to deal with the drama they cause. They move on to new supply.. like how innocent we were to these narcissistic when we first met them. We adored them not knowing what they were gonna put us through. When dating narc I even remember him saying he will miss this part in our relationship.. I was confused.. I said what part? He was talking about the love bombing part. He said we will never get it back. I later found out narcissist miss this in a relationship and will go out to cheat to get this new love bombing feeling back. Remember if they can disappear on you like this think about if you had actual real problems what would they do?? Exactly they are insecure cowards. They treat you like nothing then become nothing to them. I know the day will come he reaches out, he is not blocked. I can’t wait..to shut him down.
Amazing video A month ago, my partnership of five years came to an end. The choice to break up with the person I love is something that really gets to me. Even though it's all for nothing, I've done everything I can to get him back, and I couldn't imagine my existence without him. I've tried everything to stop thinking about him, but I still can't help but miss him and think about him often. I don't know why I am saying this here.
Saying goodbye to someone you love is difficult; I know this from my 12-year relationship ending. But I was unable to simply let him go, so I made every effort to get him back. I eventually sought aid from a spiritual counselor, who was able to help me regain his affection.
It's interesting! How can I contact a spiritual counselor most efficiently, and how did you find one?
Father Obah Eze is a wonderful spiritual counselor who has the ability to bring back your ex.
He can assist you; he is Father Obah Eze, and he possesses immense powers.
I just sought him up online thanks to your helpful information. remarkable
I just checked Father Obah Eze online, and he's really genuine. Thank you again ❤
It takes time, support, God and gaining knowledge about what narcissists are, and who you are .
It’s crazy … I caught onto these patterns very soon.. after being hovered after 7 years…. But over the 7 years we broke up , I worked on myself completely and developed a strong sense of self awareness and emotional intelligence… “thank god” … so when the relationship started I saw right thru her bullshit and was able to leave before I was discarded…. Crazy they’ll go to the bottom of leaving a “voicemail “ saying stuff like ima try again.. blah blah blah.. like no it’s over I ended it I know ur setting a stage for the future and I’m not falling for it no more… ur channel helped me so much identify love vs addiction… without that distinction I’d still be stuck…. Thank u so much 5 months outa this relationship still think of her once and a while but it dosent take over my head as much as unit use to… be strong people , this type of dynamic will teach u how to truly be emotional intelligent .. take that and run with it..
So even men can be abused and the damage can be detrimental and long lasting on top of my ptsd & trauma injuries but I’m doing ok & standing up ! 🙏🏼👨🏻🚒
After 3 years I was discarded by my partner. Within a week she is back with her ex.
She claims she is the happiest she has ever been. The same thing she told me when we first got together.
It's been just over 2 months. Now they are engaged.
She has blocked me on everything.
I don't think she is watching me or wanting to hoover me later. She seems happy.
She is telling people I raised my hand to her. Which I never did.
The only way she could contact me now is through mutual friends. Because i blocked her on everything.
@samia6888 Maybe sooner. This new supply is very controlling. And doesn't do even half the things I did for her.
You may have to get rid of mutual friends.
So glad you said all this my friends who have had for most of my life know my character and could see it now that I’m finally out I can see it unfortunately she is. My ex-wife is abusing my 23 year old daughter in the same way and I can’t, financially take care of us at this point having to retire from my firefighter paramedic position with PTSD and I think most of it was exacerbated by my ex narcissist tendency thank God, my friends are supporting me!🙏🏼👨🏻🚒
I still can't recover, the discard was 2 months ago, I though it was my friend, blame me for everything. I still want somehow this person back
Don't, it's just a feeling, a sensation, but it should fade with time. You need to understand that it's just an illusion, it's not reality, it just feels like it, the truth was a lie all the time, you were taken for a ride. Its like some sleazy salesman cheated you out of your money, and you still want the product, or at least your money back - sadly, forget it, and whatever you do, don't go back because they're just try to cheat you again, they can't help it even.
@@IoanaGheorghe-rj1de Been through the same thing! Sometimes I believed she might change, but then I saw more and realized that was not possible… that as much as I tried to convince myself that going back would be OK it eventually was clear that going back would only make everything resurface….ppl kept telling me to let her go….
Mean people suck❤
I meet that person after my dad died, my pets died, my mom has dementia and I care for her. Was like we were soul mates, like brain wash me. Left me blaming all on me, and calling me names, effectively destroy me, knowing I care for a sick person, and I barely survive day by day. Used all I told her against me, I am still stunned, still belive is a bad dream, and waiting for my friend to come back.
@@IoanaGheorghe-rj1de
🙏🕊️🙏
So well said at the end!
I thank god that I came outta that storm in one piece and I never lost myself in the fog😍❤🙏💪.
He did nothing but complain about all his past girlfriends for the first 3 months I went out with him, HUGE RED FLAG ladies. Now if I hear a guy complaining about his ex I am out of there.
Thanks Anouska, for your information 🙂👍
I was discarded 12 days ago with absolute zero arguments, just a simple block on social media and messenger. Although I found out that he has a temporary new supply for the week.
I just want this guy back 😢 feeling helpless & like a failure.
This is so true
Hi Anoushka.
Allways it's a pleasure to leasing you..
❤
Great Stuff.
Hi "cuz"! A lot of things are happening offline. Sending love and prayers over to you.
I recently text my ex about our dog passing, because I’m a good person. He went into “ I will never have another dog because of her” I said nothing back then he asked me “how is life in Boise”, I said nothing. I can’t do it, it is so obvious to me his narcissistic personality.
@@ging-a-roo2429 I told my ex that my kitten died and she didn’t respond…. So sad…..
@@ging-a-roo2429 I told her that my kitten died and she didn’t respond….😔
@@ging-a-roo2429 I tried sending you this earlier, but I’m not sure if it went through! Anyway, after my kitty died, I at least hope that she would say something but, she said nothing…. And she knew this kitty and that this kitty was very special to me….. oh well, I shouldn’t have expected anything else….
@@ging-a-roo2429 i’ll try again to send you a message! When my kitty died, the narcissist didn’t reach out once…..
Unfortunately some people never get outa this… I no people that have actually committed suicide ….
Such a shame they can make people feel so low, such crewl people... Shine bright 🥰🙏
@@krissybutler1357 amen 🙏🙏
I discarded the narc, I was just done and tired of waiting on someone to change. I’m moving on and still healing after 6 months.
I'm 4 years in sutch situation (marriage...) even divorce happend after 3 years. But still no answers explanation. Shock from all situation is : she was nicest person. Gorgeous woman ( like you ), well educated inteligent. So..?
Don't try to understand them! They have no sense, been there just take your time to heal❤
I felt the same way it was difficult but i did it 🎉
Thank you for this video ! Mine asked me to move in and our child to just tell me over text to move out 6 weeks after I moved everything in. He blocked me and I’m left wondering .
The question is simple.Ok is hard for everyone to leave us and kicking us like a a piece of garbage.But you need this person?Will this person make your life better?This person has value for you?
I have a question , narcissist woman broke up with me month ago .
Went immediately no contact , she reached out couple time to keep control , I told her to leave me alone , don’t wanna be friend . Last reached out , she asked how I was , I said feeling better and she said she was being in pain and playing victim . I answered that I’m sorry for her . Next step : she pulled out an old supply and provocated a reaction from me but didn’t give her . Now started a mix signal between hot for the new supply and mad of losing control . What is real ? Mad at me or hot for him ?
It's been 6 months she discarded me but she didn't message me till now coz my parents told her truth to her dad. She discarded me without any closure. I was so in love with her.
Are they stupid? Actually, I know they are, but would you say they're at least far-sighted even to realize the harm that they cause? I feel they don't realize it actually, doesn't even cross their mind, and could care less. But when you look at it more closely, you have to be in a lot of pain, even frustrated, yourself in order to put another person through it.
@@dcikaruga they do stupid things without a doubt, but when it comes to discarding us, they are simply cruel….
Does anyone know why a female narc will say they burned the gifts they receive from you then later say they kept everything?...is it cos they can't throw away gifts as it was attention ? Plz help
I discarded him, this time.He said now were even and one day I will realise that he wasn't playing games. And this time he didn't blocked me (yet)
What does this even means?
@@moniq1553 they are hard to understand or figure out! I’ve always found there behavior to be questionable….
@@moniq1553 trying to figure out or understand what a narcissist is up to is mind-boggling, so none of it makes sense, or as my sister says, most of what comes out of their mouth is “word salad“!
He is leaving communication avenues open hoping you will reach out and “ reverse Hoover” yourself. Just like we can reverse discard we can also reverse Hoover ourselves.Ask me how I know 🤦🏽♀️
Hold up there . Completely Normal . Well then if ‘normal’ Is a social construct and common sense disappeared . What are we doing looking for love ? After all it’s a shared experience . Stay beautiful girls and guys be delightful .
1:45