I'm 53,never married,no kids. I feel fortunate that I recognize that I am a genuinely happy person, despite that fact. A person may be able to make you happy existentially. But in your heart,you are either happy by nature,or you are not. If you are not a happy person by nature, the person you marry will not be able to make you happy.
There are needs a woman has that only a man can meet them fir her and vice versa. Let's be real now. But the opposite sex does not come to make you whole but so you both can meet each others needs
I am Asha. I'm a lawyer. And at a very early stage of my life I decided that i'll never get married and live peacefully. It has been 48 years of me on this planet and i never felt like missing out on anything. There has been struggle and hardships but i was always there with myself. I hope young generation would also learn to have good relationships with themselves and treat themselves in a better way so that they can also treat others better. I believe it is completely upto the choice of an individual and nobody should be accountable for this decision, except for the individuals themselves.
I'm 26 and doing PhD from JNU. When I was in school I decided not to marry anybody. I so much happy with my life. We are always alone but filled with love and support from the nature.
If there is love then still the same situation will carry out... Love is a very selfish emotion Always we use others for our happiness but in love while we using other person for the sake of our happiness they will also get benefited and also get happiness.
Health I do agree. But youth? I mean if you are healthy ( physically and mentally ) at any age than you are blessed. I am 26, in my country I am still part of the youth. But I don't see any blessings. My parents who are in their 60s are in a far better place than me. Happy and fulfilled. Anyway this is just a personal opinion.
I fully disagree. Life is short enough to get serious about people and things if you wanna do so. Also, how can you care & love without being somewhat attached?
I will never get bored of listening to this man speak, like bruce lee he is helping me find my own way by asking myself the right questions. you are the teacher you are the student you are the everything.
Na twosaintz take a book like 'freedom from the known' or 'think on these things' .. read them, understand them n try getting the actual grasp of how your thoughts n thought process start to travel by reading each sentence that u read from the book .. be aware of your own thought n perception :)
JK was an enlightened person and master. his style a bit dry and serious. His answer simply states marriage is using each other which is true. One never conquers loneliness with marriage.
@@sudhanshudixit3344 If jnana yoga is understood merely as intellectual assent or dissent, then it is certainly very very dry!!! But then, it is not Jnana Yoga at all. Jnana Yoga is of the heart...head only helps in correct understanding...which is essential...but practice is of tge heart!!!
He didn't say that, or mean that, you've half heard him to suit your own assumptions. What he said was if there is no love then marriage is you use her, she uses you. And it should not be that way.
You can be happy in a marriage only when you don't use your partner as the source of your feeling good. Being happy alone you can be happy married too.
@Mystic Editor no, but having sexual intercourse without love, means exploiting eachother. God has given these things to reproduce it's human who use them for pleasure, But I know one thing that, "INSTANT PLEASURE CAN'T GIVE YOU LIFE LONG SATISFACTION" because, "NO PAIN NO GAIN"
I tell younger people all the time to stop pining for a partner and spend years living alone first. No roommates either. True independence and solitude. Once you're genuinely very happy that way, then a partner to share in the journey is a positive thing. When you don't need it but it comes along, it's a gift.
@@VitaminM1 What if someone is not meant to be in such responsibility??? I mean if someone like that were to be in a relationship then it makes other's life difficult, it'll be like playing with their emotions and spoiling their inner peace!!! It makes both their lives worse not even better.... Then what is it's purpose here in such cases??? I'm asking you in a respected manner as it is boggling my mind since forever
Yes if he gave the answer it will become belief for most of people's...again your ability to find it out gets lost...because u will consider his statement right for your self which is wrong..
When you actually "find it by yourself", it is YOURS; however, if you receive from Others, they aren't yours but rather something you borrowed..Period..
Wow!! I have read his book "Freedom from the known". I have never seen such an intelligent man. It struck a chord with me when he said "You exploit her, she exploits you". Though subtle, this is true indeed. Why people marry? They want something from each other. Men primarily want sex and women want financial security(In most cases). There is this another need of psychological security as well. Fundamentally, all this is hollow. Because there is no security. Thank you for this video.
+mohit verma Hi Mohit. Actually even I looked for the free pdf copy of this book. I could not find this book online. So I had to buy Kindle digital copy of it. Kindle books can only be read in kindle software. It is not possible to mail kindle books. Sorry :(
It's pretty simple. Be happy enough on your own that a partner is a best friend with whom you enjoying sharing things. Met my husband at 39, when I was quite content on my own and never felt anything was missing. Because of that, we never feel needy or clingy towards each other. We get to be ourselves and share the journey with someone we genuinely like as well as love, lol. I honestly think that's the secret. Be so fulfilled and happy on your own you don't even need or want marriage. That seems to be precisely when a great spirit feels your vibe and comes right at ya to be with a kindred soul. We are still as happy together today as we were 13 years ago. And I never, ever thought I'd be the marriage type. ;)
@@Noneofurbusiness-g1l I've actually seen quite a few. But I agree, if more people found their own happiness first, and married a best friend, how much better would the world be for everyone?
The reason to REMAIN SINGLE is not because we are unable to handle our partner and related problems. But, we don't want to spend our precious time of life in handling such problems. Rather, we wish to invest time in making a positive change in ourselves and thereby in the society for peace, for humanity and joy. 🙏 So, it's your choice to be single or not. But if you are not able to find solutions for existing problems, don't create more complexities in life..😄 Let it be simple. 👍
Yes, I agree But what about the sexual desires Suppose a person does not have them and lives like a monk then that is fine But if someone has them and wants to enjoy, then?
Then you should get married to the correct person. The person, whom you know well & will help you in solving your difficulties and vice versa. Just remember that keep life as simple as possible.
I am 46 now never married or had children am perfectly happy, however I do sense an expectation from other people sometimes that I should be unhappy about being single. It's a fallacy. Am naturally an optimistic person always have been. Am a realist though and have suffered my fair share of life's challenges. I know life can be difficult at times but you just get back up and brush yourself off and be grateful for this life. The worst that can happen is dying and none of us escape that eventuality.
I am 30 and I have decided to remain single all my life. As I believe in solitude I know I will enjoy my life. But if I come across a woman and if my intuition feels if she is perfect then I could marry. I can remain single and happy but the only thing which I may face is the societal and family impression on me. They may nag me for remaining single but I know I can leave with it and nobody can stop me in experience the good part of this world and lead a peaceful and Serene life
Hinduism tells us not to fear death as you said, its an eventuality. In the years alive, try to make it meaningful for society and yourself. you summed it up perfectly.
@@karthikshetty4946 i want to get married but only if i find someone like...honestly, indian marriage system failed in this new generation. My parents also pressuring me to get married and i said only thing to them 'will you take responsiblity if my marriage failed??' .......i dont want my rest of life just to suffer.
We all are frightened and don't want to be alone. We seek Companionship, sexual needs, safety and security. We got what we wanted, mostly, but lost our Peace of Mind.
Marrying is upbringing of children upto 25 years.......After that match a relationship..... Marriage is not easy..... Marriage will not be Suitable for All.....Some shine .....Some Dark
@@SuperTekton Yeah man everyone is corrupt but you, and yes Only if you can get your Winnie up and running, else she will call someone else in your absence. XD
So you get engaged with this particular speech just to seek comfort n sense of security n comfort. Reducing your cognitive dissonance. 😄 how complex is human mind. It can seek anyway what it what's.
Single and never had sex. I’m 35, happier, and excited to live life! I don’t understand the need to have someone’s love for one to have some good time on earth. Ofcourse I adore happy relationships, but I’m here to say: “you are more than enough!”
This "part of life" really bothers me for a long time. I dont know. I am not just into romantic love. It's too small. The world there is too small. It's like you are limiting yourself to universal love. And by involving yourself to a romantic relationship, you don't get to discover your highest potential as a human being.
The idea of marriage in the world long ago was to share responsiblities in life. The women looked after the home and children while the husband earned. There was an understanding. With industrialization the meaning of marriage has changed.
I have come to love my solitude. I am not chasing anything but I do practice gratitude for even existing, for this very life. I firmly believe everything in life is temporary and it has indeed relieved me of all the negativity that consumes us mortal beings.
That's how I was, for many years. I wanted nothing, was totally content on my own. I believe that time and coming to that state was what drew my husband right to me. He's also very independent. We have very different paths but sharing one has been a blast. I'm so grateful for all of it.
If you understand that you are whole and complete then you won't depend on anyone for your happiness and joy. Relationships with unconditional love and respect and without any dependencies are true relationships.
i don't feel that i cant stand alone. best days are when you are happy with yourself. Usually most people make other miserable, glad i did not fall into the societal trap yet. I feel safe & secure with myself.
Very simple: if you marry, you know where to sleep but you can't sleep; if you are not married, you don't know where you'll sleep but you will sleep well. So choose wisely an option that suits you best and don't be regretful for the decision. God bless you, my child.
If you don't want to marry, you have to get enrolled in a religious community which is the only way by which you will get socialized and social companionship !! Otherwise society will eat you up unless you are some great contributor in some field.... Especially in India...
Firstly, i am glad i live in a country where i can decide what i want to do, others are not so blessed. Not married, never married, have one grown Daughter & two Grand Daughters, feeling contented.
Marriage is to enjoy meterial pleasures......if one can find out the source of Bliss in inside.. no need for a partner....He can share his owerfloying love to anyone....then marriage is not a must.❤️❤️J.K.
Marriage or not. It’s important to realize the most important thing is to be true to yourself as it is with ourselves we have the most important relationship. So, don’t be shocked when the marriage doesn’t work. Be brave enough to choose yourself if you’re not happy. Nothing is permanent.
you can live in a way, that every human being is your friend. Then, when you can talk to just about anyone and connect with them on the basis of being human, you’re never alone. It just requires a leap of faith.
A true Master. Should we marry?.. Do what you want! But go into it with full consciousness. And, without love, you will just use each other. Krishnamurti always hits the nail on the head, even when he laughs at the question. I personally believe he was a fully Realized being, but others may not see this and what do I really know anyway :)
@@devoshrimukharjee748 How is appreciating other gender wrong, for an unmarried person? Your questions makes no sense. Unmarried doesn't necessarily equate to misogyny.
We just gotta flow with life, if u meet someone you think is good ya it's ok to have a marriage, if it goes south later on you just deal with it and let go, every relationship in life is a struggle to a certain degree, all we can do is enjoy whats present for us and if adversity hits heal from it and let go.
It is not easy to keep the sexual appeal forever in a marriage and many marriages end because of that. I would stay in it even without sex if the spouse were kind, respectful, and there was sense of commitment on both sides.
Very true. Marriage should not be based on sex or sexual attraction. That naturally wanes over time. A genuine connection and deep love and respect will only deepen.
Thank you for sharing this. And thank you for Jiddu’s parents to have been an instrument of Grace in manifesting such a beautiful Soul into earthly existence.
..i have married, i have had male lovers, female lovers, i am now perfectly living with myself. I am never alone, there is me, and I existing together in perfect harmony.
Love the way JK s answered to the question. True one getting married is not an issue, but JKs concept is how to live in harmony and with total love. Once u become totally attentive, then the relationship towards ur family and others will be in different level altogether and that state is JK talking about.
Marriage is an outdated concept in the West, it goes back to a time when a woman wasn't able to fend for herself. It made sense back then. Today it is merely tradition or some fantastic idea, trying to fixate something (erotic love) which by nature is elusive and impermanent.
Marriage isn't about sex or anything erotic, lol. I know a lot of long happily married couples, none of them cite sex as the best part or secret to the longevity. Marriage is about 2 people who are best friends, sharing their lives. Sex is fleeting. Genuine connection and having someone there to laugh with you and support you, while you support them, is what marriage is about. And it's glorious.
This constant demand and talk about freedom and independance can be irritating.What exactly do you want freedom from, people related and unrelated to you or everything around you?freedom should come from within . The most unacceptable part is that we all know that death and only death is the only one that can liberate , free you.Can you be more independant or free like plants and animals?
Be Single...Be Happy... Because great mind said... happiness depends on oneself do not seek it outside... If marriage was happiness then there would not have been the divorce concept... Everyone has different life different opinion...I prefer being single...
To summarize: do what you want and stop bothering me with such questions. Totally agreed with him. Basically if you a relationship then do it because you want to, not because you need to. In other words, don't be codependant, be interdependant.
Most of us can stand alone without any companion. I never married. I never wish to … and about sexual desires they passes with time. You stop wanting it.
as a christian from Botswana, i like reading and listening to words of wisdom and so far, Krishnamurti is the wiseman, the way he answers and teaches proves hes a great soul, and the bible talks about three wisemen from the east, eastern philosophy is often rich of wisdom
"If there is no love you uses her ,she uses you and you exploits her,she exploits you" If there is love then still the same situation will carry out... Love is a very selfish emotion Always we use others for our own happiness but in love while we using other person for the sake of our happiness they will also get benefited and also get happiness.
marriage can be considered a shortcut for spiritual maturation... it depends on who really are and how you consider marriage.. your whole story evolves around you and your choices.. marriage is good for those who are ready to (give)
I think marrying is a wonderful thing for a man n woman...It is the foundation for a family..where children learn values through love n acceptance...true any relationship one has to work for...where honesty love unselfishness creates understanding, forgiveness n love....please do not put down marriage...let it be known as a positive step in life...
marriage is one of those institutions of human life meant to unite, build and create stable societies rooting from a marriage unit set up as part of those binding forces of a progressive society, marriage in the traditional sense of the word is more good than bad, it is good but not the best, has room for development, that is why we see marriage laws changing and so on and so forth because it involves a lot, involves children and families and money and norms etc Sometimes these changing laws stengthen but sometimes they weaken this institution... But overall, the intentions are usually good
As I saw the title, I didn't expect this answer. It provided me a powerful base for marriage: learn with someone how to live without conflict, without sense of struggle, adaption, adjustment. And nevertheless do what u want, why bother the other with this question
I have been married 20 years until she passed away. We were born 12 hours apart same year. I always thought of her to be a soul mate. After passing 1 1/2 years later I met someone unbelievably more magnetically connected, when l learned of the terminology twin flame. In my journey I have to believe in the flow of life there are "meant to be" situations. Planned before birth?
So many people are ashamed to say what u said but it's so true , my friend was married 35 years he passed and she met someone and she said she loved her husband but the new guy was such a different kind of love, i just wish younger people would find that love instead of going with everyone and never really being happy..i know u posted this a year ago but i just watched to video...
Sir J Krishnamurthy, I feel a lot of incompleteness and void in what you speak...thank God there is an end to everything... And hope you've found peace in losing yourself post death, I think that's all you ever needed!
J. Krishnamurti: "In this relationship between man and woman, there is no love" (3.27) Lord Byron: "For he who loves another loves himself even for that other's sake" (Sardanapalus: Act 1, 487)
People are afraid of the internal exploring and journey. Because it's hard, painful and shatters the comfortable settings provided by the outward journey. People forgot that inwards is the real journey and outwards is just a scenery for pleasure. Dig deep. Be yourself. Be original.
JKs method to get across the truth is exemplary. He draws into the presence by repeating the question, then what comes out from him is out of the box. Yes, marriage is the microcosm of society, and it is like a season in existence. His word "complexity" serves in different ways. physical relationship in the youth and companionship in the later stages. "Love" is an important factor which everyone agrees, it's how you treat your partner as an extension of yourself rather than the other. The needs then get dissolved into one. So , its a matter of choice to get into the system that facilitates social construct or stay away. No story is the same for everyone, depends on the divine providence, and the urge that responds to it.
We are comfortable only with ourself...we should learn to live alone...soul is alone...in all relationships there are expectations...when there are expectations in relationship ,it's not pure..
This man was just too amazing! What a fantastic answer to a silly question. I love when he simply answers at first...I don't know! And smiles. Wonderful.
I really recommend to everyone who likes Krishnamurti's work to read a book called The Present at Truth Contest. It changed my life and can change yours.
My question is for married ones. What was your feeling for that person after sex ?? After year's of months do you the sexual desires as you were have at the day 1 of your marriage??? If asking here a life that you two guys promise to each other to live in every hard situation together, what are those situations did you guys get through it comfortably ???? Did you enjoy after marriage of before marriage??? Do you want your unmarried life back or you gonna get use to with your married life ???
I'm 53,never married,no kids. I feel fortunate that I recognize that I am a genuinely happy person, despite that fact. A person may be able to make you happy existentially. But in your heart,you are either happy by nature,or you are not. If you are not a happy person by nature, the person you marry will not be able to make you happy.
But but to have children which look like you and bring them up is a blessing. The thing is you still have to carry out your spiritual work.
kawasaki whip two wow awesome
Well said..true.. somepeople can't understand this..
Superb brother.. ..
@@jimbrown234 if you cannot see children as children then there is "hope"
I feel complete and happy and in peace by myself. I don't believe in another person making you happy. It is an illusion. You are all you need
I agree with u...but we need companionship to share things.... sometimes we feel alone...isn't it??
Yes indeed!
@timothy wait agree with u....i know i need to grow up more...
There are needs a woman has that only a man can meet them fir her and vice versa. Let's be real now. But the opposite sex does not come to make you whole but so you both can meet each others needs
U are going towards nirvana😝
I am Asha. I'm a lawyer. And at a very early stage of my life I decided that i'll never get married and live peacefully.
It has been 48 years of me on this planet and i never felt like missing out on anything.
There has been struggle and hardships but i was always there with myself.
I hope young generation would also learn to have good relationships with themselves and treat themselves in a better way so that they can also treat others better.
I believe it is completely upto the choice of an individual and nobody should be accountable for this decision, except for the individuals themselves.
Well said.
Absolutely true . God bless
How to convince my parents
Don't think me wrong by asking this.
How did u fulfilled ur biological urges?
I'm 26 and doing PhD from JNU. When I was in school I decided not to marry anybody. I so much happy with my life. We are always alone but filled with love and support from the nature.
So true.. "If thr is no love.. You use her and she uses you, you exploit her and she exploits you" totally agree
Very true
If there is love then still the same situation will carry out...
Love is a very selfish emotion
Always we use others for our happiness but in love while we using other person for the sake of our happiness they will also get benefited and also get happiness.
Please avneet how with examples
Avneet Manchanda yes it's absolutely true...
@@karimajjinaresh8095 your definition for that what you call love is wrong then.
He who does not enjoy solitude does not appreciate freedom;
Health, youth and freedom are the greatest blessings of life.
💯💯💯
I disagree and yet I am 18 ~ Enlightenment no matter the age is the greatest blessing.
@@PriceCodm I wonder how you would feel after 20 years
Please don't say youth...It looks scary for a 25yr old😂😂😂
Health I do agree. But youth? I mean if you are healthy ( physically and mentally ) at any age than you are blessed. I am 26, in my country I am still part of the youth. But I don't see any blessings. My parents who are in their 60s are in a far better place than me. Happy and fulfilled. Anyway this is just a personal opinion.
"We are never at home with anybody because we are living in our own thoughts in our own problems and our own ambitions." POWERFUL
Indeed.
"If your looking for that special somebody to change your whole life, then look no further than the mirror."
Deep
So true
👌
But mirror will just reflect your physicality, if you really want to see the "you" you've to close your eyes I suppose..
BINGO Namaste
Life is too short to get attached or get too serious about people or things , just observe and enjoy and love unconditionally without expectations ❤️
PersianBoy Easier said than done. :)
This.
True😍
Observe and enjoy....so beautifully said.
I fully disagree. Life is short enough to get serious about people and things if you wanna do so. Also, how can you care & love without being somewhat attached?
I will never get bored of listening to this man speak, like bruce lee he is helping me find my own way by asking myself the right questions. you are the teacher you are the student you are the everything.
Same R.I.P.
How's the journey? Decided to start on mine. Any advice ?
Fun fact : Even Bruce Lee used K's books in building his mental strength n awareness during his time!! :)
Na twosaintz take a book like 'freedom from the known' or 'think on these things' .. read them, understand them n try getting the actual grasp of how your thoughts n thought process start to travel by reading each sentence that u read from the book .. be aware of your own thought n perception :)
yagnesh ravi teja yrt Thank you so much for the response. Im here now, observing :)
JK was an enlightened person and master. his style a bit dry and serious. His answer simply states marriage is using each other which is true. One never conquers loneliness with marriage.
If you're married, you're lonelier than ever before!
Gnan yoga is believed to be drier than other yogic branches
He says 'if there is no love, you use her, she uses you.'
@@sudhanshudixit3344 If jnana yoga is understood merely as intellectual assent or dissent, then it is certainly very very dry!!! But then, it is not Jnana Yoga at all. Jnana Yoga is of the heart...head only helps in correct understanding...which is essential...but practice is of tge heart!!!
He didn't say that, or mean that, you've half heard him to suit your own assumptions. What he said was if there is no love then marriage is you use her, she uses you. And it should not be that way.
You can be happy in a marriage only when you don't use your partner as the source of your feeling good.
Being happy alone you can be happy married too.
👌🏼
THIS 👏👏👏 Absolutely Agree
@Mystic Editor no, but having sexual intercourse without love, means exploiting eachother. God has given these things to reproduce it's human who use them for pleasure,
But I know one thing that,
"INSTANT PLEASURE CAN'T GIVE YOU LIFE LONG SATISFACTION"
because,
"NO PAIN NO GAIN"
Well said 👌👌
I tell younger people all the time to stop pining for a partner and spend years living alone first. No roommates either. True independence and solitude. Once you're genuinely very happy that way, then a partner to share in the journey is a positive thing. When you don't need it but it comes along, it's a gift.
"exploiting". WOW, K. was bluntly wise and honest. and he was right.
It's good to get married!
But, it's great to remain unmarried.
Well said
I have never felt the need to marry someone to feel complete. I am happily single and not in any relationship whatsoever.
Don't fear to take responsibility make your life better so you can make someone's life better..
@@VitaminM1 What if someone is not meant to be in such responsibility??? I mean if someone like that were to be in a relationship then it makes other's life difficult, it'll be like playing with their emotions and spoiling their inner peace!!! It makes both their lives worse not even better.... Then what is it's purpose here in such cases??? I'm asking you in a respected manner as it is boggling my mind since forever
That's a good choice.
@@VitaminM1 we don't need a companionship to feel complete!
@@VitaminM1 why?
What I liked about this man is this that he never answer any question, he always gives the clue and say to you 'Find it by yourself'. 😇
Yes if he gave the answer it will become belief for most of people's...again your ability to find it out gets lost...because u will consider his statement right for your self which is wrong..
When you actually "find it by yourself", it is YOURS; however, if you receive from Others, they aren't yours but rather something you borrowed..Period..
Wow!! I have read his book "Freedom from the known". I have never seen such an intelligent man. It struck a chord with me when he said "You exploit her, she exploits you". Though subtle, this is true indeed. Why people marry? They want something from each other. Men primarily want sex and women want financial security(In most cases). There is this another need of psychological security as well. Fundamentally, all this is hollow. Because there is no security. Thank you for this video.
+Pankaj Kumar i want book can u give me....original price is very high
+mohit verma Hi Mohit. Actually even I looked for the free pdf copy of this book. I could not find this book online. So I had to buy Kindle digital copy of it. Kindle books can only be read in kindle software. It is not possible to mail kindle books. Sorry :(
ok..... i m big fan of krishnamurti.......How much u paid for digital copy??
+mohit verma tinyurl.com/pucwjg3
Use this link to buy.
hmmm.... but i cant afford...thnx fr feed back...
It's pretty simple. Be happy enough on your own that a partner is a best friend with whom you enjoying sharing things. Met my husband at 39, when I was quite content on my own and never felt anything was missing. Because of that, we never feel needy or clingy towards each other. We get to be ourselves and share the journey with someone we genuinely like as well as love, lol. I honestly think that's the secret. Be so fulfilled and happy on your own you don't even need or want marriage. That seems to be precisely when a great spirit feels your vibe and comes right at ya to be with a kindred soul. We are still as happy together today as we were 13 years ago. And I never, ever thought I'd be the marriage type. ;)
Wow beautiful story...💛💚💚
❤❤❤ need more stories like this
@@Noneofurbusiness-g1l I've actually seen quite a few. But I agree, if more people found their own happiness first, and married a best friend, how much better would the world be for everyone?
@@iaf4454 thank you! Best surprise of my life, my marriage.
Do you have children?☺️
The reason to REMAIN SINGLE is not because we are unable to handle our partner and related problems. But, we don't want to spend our precious time of life in handling such problems. Rather, we wish to invest time in making a positive change in ourselves and thereby in the society for peace, for humanity and joy.
🙏
So, it's your choice to be single or not. But if you are not able to find solutions for existing problems, don't create more complexities in life..😄
Let it be simple. 👍
Yes, I agree
But what about the sexual desires
Suppose a person does not have them and lives like a monk then that is fine
But if someone has them and wants to enjoy, then?
Then you should get married to the correct person. The person, whom you know well & will help you in solving your difficulties and vice versa.
Just remember that keep life as simple as possible.
I am 46 now never married or had children am perfectly happy, however I do sense an expectation from other people sometimes that I should be unhappy about being single. It's a fallacy. Am naturally an optimistic person always have been. Am a realist though and have suffered my fair share of life's challenges. I know life can be difficult at times but you just get back up and brush yourself off and be grateful for this life. The worst that can happen is dying and none of us escape that eventuality.
I am 30 and I have decided to remain single all my life. As I believe in solitude I know I will enjoy my life. But if I come across a woman and if my intuition feels if she is perfect then I could marry. I can remain single and happy but the only thing which I may face is the societal and family impression on me. They may nag me for remaining single but I know I can leave with it and nobody can stop me in experience the good part of this world and lead a peaceful and Serene life
Don't fear to take responsibility make your life better so you can make someone's life better
Hinduism tells us not to fear death as you said, its an eventuality. In the years alive, try to make it meaningful for society and yourself. you summed it up perfectly.
@@karthikshetty4946 i want to get married but only if i find someone like...honestly, indian marriage system failed in this new generation. My parents also pressuring me to get married and i said only thing to them 'will you take responsiblity if my marriage failed??' .......i dont want my rest of life just to suffer.
@@ava-if8xc inspite of Glory & wealth....Stars like Leonardo DiCaprio @ 46 are not marrying
“My wife and I were happy for 30 years. Then we met.”
This quote was said by some comedian 🤔🤔🤔🤔
@@sanjeevkushwaha4043 That’s why I put it in quotation marks.
🤣🤣
😂
🤣🤣
We all are frightened and don't want to be alone. We seek Companionship, sexual needs, safety and security.
We got what we wanted, mostly, but lost our Peace of Mind.
Marrying is upbringing of children upto 25 years.......After that match a relationship..... Marriage is not easy..... Marriage will not be Suitable for All.....Some shine .....Some Dark
The most intelligent, smart and integrated person I've ever seen in my life. The deepest respect to him 🙏
When you have seen in madanapalle
Look in the mirror ("Heart ) you will find one more.
It’s a woman no ?
Wow
@@yasmine2579 no
I thought this was a woman! 😊 we should be free to choose whether to marry or not with no criticism from friends, family, or society 🙏🏽
Me too
🙋♀️
Wow, it gives me strength every time I listen to this man. Going through breakup and this gives me some relief.
Pawan Kuma...I did the same bro..but I’m married now..haha
@@SuperTekton sicko spotted
@@SuperTekton Yeah man everyone is corrupt but you, and yes Only if you can get your Winnie up and running, else she will call someone else in your absence. XD
This is a man ?!!!!
So you get engaged with this particular speech just to seek comfort n sense of security n comfort. Reducing your cognitive dissonance. 😄 how complex is human mind. It can seek anyway what it what's.
Single and never had sex. I’m 35, happier, and excited to live life! I don’t understand the need to have someone’s love for one to have some good time on earth. Ofcourse I adore happy relationships, but I’m here to say: “you are more than enough!”
36 here hahhaha
I wish your parents never had sex 😂
If everyone think like you, no human will be left on earth after 150 years
So just imagine how wrong you are
@Newmoon19 And what exactly about it would be wrong ? Do you just listen to people or do you also think
@@Newmoon19 All spirits would be free from their bodily imprisonment.
i dont know why tears are streaming all over my face the moment he spoke. i felt every single word he said. he was truly an amazing speaker
This man is incredible
This "part of life" really bothers me for a long time. I dont know. I am not just into romantic love. It's too small. The world there is too small. It's like you are limiting yourself to universal love. And by involving yourself to a romantic relationship, you don't get to discover your highest potential as a human being.
andré valeroso well said ✌🏼
andré valeroso
You have to put so much focus on one person. I don’t like romantic love. It’s too binding.
@@ManPursueExcellence true. there is a deeper type of love everyone should pursue.
True but there are married people who continued their spiritual life even after marriage but it’s tough I think.
andré valeroso
Exactly my thoughts atm
The idea of marriage in the world long ago was to share responsiblities in life. The women looked after the home and children while the husband earned. There was an understanding. With industrialization the meaning of marriage has changed.
I have come to love my solitude. I am not chasing anything but I do practice gratitude for even existing, for this very life. I firmly believe everything in life is temporary and it has indeed relieved me of all the negativity that consumes us mortal beings.
That's how I was, for many years. I wanted nothing, was totally content on my own. I believe that time and coming to that state was what drew my husband right to me. He's also very independent. We have very different paths but sharing one has been a blast. I'm so grateful for all of it.
Will take that deep into my soul
In this corrupt society, If one wants to walk incorruptible, he must be alone.
If you understand that you are whole and complete then you won't depend on anyone for your happiness and joy. Relationships with unconditional love and respect and without any dependencies are true relationships.
The speaker knows deep into the nature of human beings.
i don't feel that i cant stand alone. best days are when you are happy with yourself. Usually most people make other miserable, glad i did not fall into the societal trap yet. I feel safe & secure with myself.
God's grace bro.
I read a quote years ago from His Holiness The 14th Dalai Lama that was simple and profound- "Love all people more than you need them."
Very simple: if you marry, you know where to sleep but you can't sleep; if you are not married, you don't know where you'll sleep but you will sleep well. So choose wisely an option that suits you best and don't be regretful for the decision. God bless you, my child.
That doesn't really make sense, lol. Why would you not sleep when married, or not have a place to sleep single?
DAMNNN son❗
@@catherineshaw1122 agreed. A pretty bizarre comment.
If you don't want to marry, you have to get enrolled in a religious community which is the only way by which you will get socialized and social companionship !! Otherwise society will eat you up unless you are some great contributor in some field.... Especially in India...
Firstly, i am glad i live in a country where i can decide what i want to do, others are not so blessed. Not married, never married, have one grown Daughter & two Grand Daughters, feeling contented.
Marriage is to enjoy meterial pleasures......if one can find out the source of Bliss in inside.. no need for a partner....He can share his owerfloying love to anyone....then marriage is not a must.❤️❤️J.K.
He is a man who spoke only about facts of life. To understand his words we need a free mind. Thanks for him and all who made his words available
Marriage or not. It’s important to realize the most important thing is to be true to yourself as it is with ourselves we have the most important relationship. So, don’t be shocked when the marriage doesn’t work. Be brave enough to choose yourself if you’re not happy. Nothing is permanent.
He is giving shock for every asleep man or woman without any expectation he was really a blessed one or enlightened one.
Nothing is absolutely necessary for a simple life other than the things needed for maintaining one's physical existence with ease.
you can live in a way, that every human being is your friend. Then, when you can talk to just about anyone and connect with them on the basis of being human, you’re never alone. It just requires a leap of faith.
Won't be leaping to faith here
You can pretend that every human being is your friend, but they're not. How do you react when that's not true, over and over and over again, lol?
This is a naive way to live life. Not everybody is your friend. Some people will harm you with the information you share to be benefitted
It take INTELLIGENCE AND INTEGRITY..... most people missed that!
I'm 36 not married and no kids (of course) 😅 now I just let the time to decide. Im enjoying gardening for now.
M , 37. But unhappy becoz single
@@sadafmaqsood2817 Me too
I wish , we all had that liberty in India.
@@sadafmaqsood2817 if u marry u will be even more sad hahaha 🤣
@@sadafmaqsood2817you are very beautiful reason is celibacy are you interested in marry
A true Master. Should we marry?.. Do what you want! But go into it with full consciousness. And, without love, you will just use each other.
Krishnamurti always hits the nail on the head, even when he laughs at the question. I personally believe he was a fully Realized being, but others may not see this and what do I really know anyway :)
The comment section is a real tresure house 💞
No other in this Universe completes you.
That is because you complete yourself.
I am into my solitude.. I love it.. It's a bliss for me🙏🙏
How old are you?
It is not necessary to marry in life....I am 41years old unmarried man n very happy....
Then why do you have a woman's picture as your dp? You clearly appreciate the opposite sex.
@@devoshrimukharjee748
How is appreciating other gender wrong, for an unmarried person? Your questions makes no sense. Unmarried doesn't necessarily equate to misogyny.
We just gotta flow with life, if u meet someone you think is good ya it's ok to have a marriage, if it goes south later on you just deal with it and let go, every relationship in life is a struggle to a certain degree, all we can do is enjoy whats present for us and if adversity hits heal from it and let go.
Master Oogway? You're alive?
+IKilledMufasa5 OOOooh yes Kind Sir ! :)
Lol
He’s the original Master Oogway.
I know right?!😂😂..especially the I don't know at 0:34
It is not easy to keep the sexual appeal forever in a marriage and many marriages end because of that. I would stay in it even without sex if the spouse were kind, respectful, and there was sense of commitment on both sides.
Very true. Marriage should not be based on sex or sexual attraction. That naturally wanes over time. A genuine connection and deep love and respect will only deepen.
29 dislike....married couple... :D joke
manni singh 68 lol
@@Number-op1by whats the with lol dumbo
😂 😂 😂 😂
Now 107 :(
😁
In all your lectures,i always be waiting for your one smile...because the way you smile that can heals anyone's heart...respect 💝
♥️😍
Great, True.
Peop just live together because of fear of living alone.
Unfortunately true
Thank you for sharing this. And thank you for Jiddu’s parents to have been an instrument of Grace in manifesting such a beautiful Soul into earthly existence.
If you want a relationship of any nature then Accept don't Adapt. But if not, embrace Solitude and differentiate it from Loneliness.
..i have married, i have had male lovers, female lovers, i am now perfectly living with myself. I am never alone, there is me, and I existing together in perfect harmony.
You know what i feel about him? Just to hug him with affection. Even i am man i feel such affection for him.
Love the way JK s answered to the question. True one getting married is not an issue, but JKs concept is how to live in harmony and with total love. Once u become totally attentive, then the relationship towards ur family and others will be in different level altogether and that state is JK talking about.
Marriage is an outdated concept in the West, it goes back to a time when a woman wasn't able to fend for herself. It made sense back then. Today it is merely tradition or some fantastic idea, trying to fixate something (erotic love) which by nature is elusive and impermanent.
Marriage isn't about sex or anything erotic, lol. I know a lot of long happily married couples, none of them cite sex as the best part or secret to the longevity. Marriage is about 2 people who are best friends, sharing their lives. Sex is fleeting. Genuine connection and having someone there to laugh with you and support you, while you support them, is what marriage is about. And it's glorious.
Marrying feels very limiting to me, just like living in one place forever.
Hmmmm well said girl
Yes... freedom is our first choice in life...
a bird belongs to the sky...
This constant demand and talk about freedom and independance can be irritating.What exactly do you want freedom from, people related and unrelated to you or everything around you?freedom should come from within . The most unacceptable part is that we all know that death and only death is the only one that can liberate , free you.Can you be more independant or free like plants and animals?
It depends on your idea of relationship. If you go after freedom, that "going after" itself limits your freedom.
I am so glad he speaks all his wisdom in english. I love this guy and brings peace to my heart
For men companionship and emotional support
For women security
But these days we don't get it from marriage
Marriage has lost its utility value
Wow,what a profound understanding he had,jiddu Krishnamurti always introduces us with unprecedented approaches.
Be Single...Be Happy... Because great mind said... happiness depends on oneself do not seek it outside... If marriage was happiness then there would not have been the divorce concept... Everyone has different life different opinion...I prefer being single...
Crazy how you can be married and still feel like you dont have enough.
To summarize: do what you want and stop bothering me with such questions. Totally agreed with him. Basically if you a relationship then do it because you want to, not because you need to. In other words, don't be codependant, be interdependant.
Most of us can stand alone without any companion. I never married. I never wish to … and about sexual desires they passes with time. You stop wanting it.
The answer is all opinions expressed are perfectly correct...There is no one answer to such a question
Albert Camus - 'The only way to deal with an unfree world is to become so absolutely free that your very existence is an act of rebellion.'
💚💜💜
as a christian from Botswana, i like reading and listening to words of wisdom and so far, Krishnamurti is the wiseman, the way he answers and teaches proves hes a great soul, and the bible talks about three wisemen from the east, eastern philosophy is often rich of wisdom
and *you* are still a *christian*.
I say definitely not. It’s not necessary to marry. At least not in the physical form of a legal contract.
"If there is no love you uses her ,she uses you and you exploits her,she exploits you"
If there is love then still the same situation will carry out...
Love is a very selfish emotion
Always we use others for our own happiness but in love while we using other person for the sake of our happiness they will also get benefited and also get happiness.
So you want a world where all selfish states are eradicated ?
Sadly marriage can be a very lonely place
marriage can be considered a shortcut for spiritual maturation... it depends on who really are and how you consider marriage.. your whole story evolves around you and your choices.. marriage is good for those who are ready to (give)
I think marrying is a wonderful thing for a man n woman...It is the foundation for a family..where children learn values through love n acceptance...true any relationship one has to work for...where honesty love unselfishness creates understanding, forgiveness n love....please do not put down marriage...let it be known as a positive step in life...
…
🗿
'...because most of us cannot stand alone on our own feet...
lovely answer!😊
So true life is lonely and complex
Everybody fear to live alone that's y they need someone to be their...
Being alone is best thing u can do ever .
marriage is one of those institutions of human life meant to unite, build and create stable societies rooting from a marriage unit set up as part of those binding forces of a progressive society, marriage in the traditional sense of the word is more good than bad, it is good but not the best, has room for development, that is why we see marriage laws changing and so on and so forth because it involves a lot, involves children and families and money and norms etc Sometimes these changing laws stengthen but sometimes they weaken this institution... But overall, the intentions are usually good
Sociology
As I saw the title, I didn't expect this answer. It provided me a powerful base for marriage: learn with someone how to live without conflict, without sense of struggle, adaption, adjustment. And nevertheless do what u want, why bother the other with this question
I like his sense of humour. It's subtle and wise
I have been married 20 years until she passed away. We were born 12 hours apart same year. I always thought of her to be a soul mate. After passing 1 1/2 years later I met someone unbelievably more magnetically connected, when l learned of the terminology twin flame. In my journey I have to believe in the flow of life there are "meant to be" situations. Planned before birth?
I haven’t experienced this phenomena “yet” - I hope so.
So many people are ashamed to say what u said but it's so true , my friend was married 35 years he passed and she met someone and she said she loved her husband but the new guy was such a different kind of love, i just wish younger people would find that love instead of going with everyone and never really being happy..i know u posted this a year ago but i just watched to video...
166 dislikes came from people who cannot comprehend the depth of what he said.
in which case they should have stayed silent
I hope they at least disagreed
Sir J Krishnamurthy, I feel a lot of incompleteness and void in what you speak...thank God there is an end to everything... And hope you've found peace in losing yourself post death, I think that's all you ever needed!
J. Krishnamurti: "In this relationship between man and woman, there is no love" (3.27)
Lord Byron: "For he who loves another loves himself
even for that other's sake"
(Sardanapalus: Act 1, 487)
AndMakrid...i'm so posting this on my wall (FB)...how awesome is this!
Thank You
My answer is yes because i am able to say yes to life and able to take care of my partner and my family...
Idiots wont realize she's actually saying yes it's necessary however it requires love, intelligence and integrity
People are afraid of the internal exploring and journey. Because it's hard, painful and shatters the comfortable settings provided by the outward journey. People forgot that inwards is the real journey and outwards is just a scenery for pleasure. Dig deep. Be yourself. Be original.
I view it the same way I heard Alan Watts describe religion, you dont need it, but when you realise you dont need it its fun to have it.
Haha
JKs method to get across the truth is exemplary. He draws into the presence by repeating the question, then what comes out from him is out of the box. Yes, marriage is the microcosm of society, and it is like a season in existence. His word "complexity" serves in different ways. physical relationship in the youth and companionship in the later stages. "Love" is an important factor which everyone agrees, it's how you treat your partner as an extension of yourself rather than the other. The needs then get dissolved into one. So , its a matter of choice to get into the system that facilitates social construct or stay away. No story is the same for everyone, depends on the divine providence, and the urge that responds to it.
"marriage is the microcosm of society", very well said.
I don't understand this guy. Feels like am stupid.
We are comfortable only with ourself...we should learn to live alone...soul is alone...in all relationships there are expectations...when there are expectations in relationship ,it's not pure..
Super
This man was just too amazing! What a fantastic answer to a silly question. I love when he simply answers at first...I don't know! And smiles. Wonderful.
I really recommend to everyone who likes Krishnamurti's work to read a book called The Present at Truth Contest. It changed my life and can change yours.
My question is for married ones. What was your feeling for that person after sex ?? After year's of months do you the sexual desires as you were have at the day 1 of your marriage??? If asking here a life that you two guys promise to each other to live in every hard situation together, what are those situations did you guys get through it comfortably ???? Did you enjoy after marriage of before marriage??? Do you want your unmarried life back or you gonna get use to with your married life ???
I regret that i got married ...i regret that i did not have enlightenment at that age ....i wish I was that wise which i am today
Any piece of life advice for me?
I m feeling so relaxed after reading the comments here