Thank you for watching! What's one boundary you can put into place now (whether or not you're in a relationship) that will have the future you saying "thank you!"? 😌
So so so good. Finances is one of those things that I think we tend to put on the back burner until it’s really late. Being intentional in that area is definitely going to pay off. Keep going 👏🏾
man y’all spitting facts!! “Make sure your relationship is God focused, not YOU focused. That doesn’t mean your relationship isn’t first priority, but that God is first priority in your relationship.”
I’m here for this!! 😍 A helpful boundary for us currently, especially being long distance, is not talking late at night - it guards our hearts, helps us have energy for work/school the next day, and *boom boom* allows us to wake up early to seek the Lord!!
Hi! when do you talk then? I'm in a long distance relationship too and the only free time in common we have is at night; so we call each other at night but it really affects our sleep schedule. It ain't a problem since it doesn't cause us to stumble but it does ruin our agenda a bit. Any advice? :)
I am young and I gave my life to Christ a year ago,and I’m choosing to wait untill I’m out of college to even date,and wait untill marriage to have any intimacy. I will be applying all these tips to my future relationship because they are all reasonable!! Thank you!!☺️
I've had bad relationships in the past, but I've begun praying for a future spouse that loves God more than me. And knowing that God places us in relationships to glorify Him has been eye-opening for me!! When the time arrives, I've also made up my mind to only be at their place, if there are other people about, friends/roommates/family, etc., or be alone only while the curtains are open, in sight of a window. You've also made me realise that it's okay to restrain from kissing and hugging for a while. I'm now content with the idea of agreeing to abstain from kissing until marriage if my future partner desires to. Thank you both!!
If only the younger version of myself could've listened to this video I could've avoided a lot of compromises made in my walk with God while dating. This is really good and really important content.
Thank you for watching, Engineered By God. And that’s a huge reason we wanted to share our experience because there were some things we did right and somethings we didn’t that we wanted to spare others if possible. Thanks again for the support.
Been focusing on getting my finances right, not going to each other's houses, making sure that the relationship is Christ centered and set physical boundaries as well
I like the insight that you want to be able to walk away without a soul tie in case it doesn't work. And keeping the emotions in check helps by not hugging, atleast before engagement
I have never thought about these other points (point 1and 2) before. Anytime I hear relationship boundaries, I only think physical boundaries. I have never been into a relationship but these would help when I get into one.
Yes, us too! People normally stress physical boundaries, which I get. But spiritual, emotional and financial boundaries are also important. Thanks for watching and sharing!
I definitely think waiting until it's right and you've really built a solid foundation is smart, but physical chemistry is a big deal and I'd definitely want to know that I'm physically compatible with someone before marrying them - that's me personally. Also, I'm a hugger by nature so you're getting hugs right away - whether you're a platonic friend or potentially husband material.
loved that you guys spoke on finances... the importance of speaking on this subject as early as early can be is so good to recognize! thank you both and may God bless your marriage :) love from south florida
Yes, talking about finances definitely helped to prepare us to get comfortable talking about things that can get super awkward quick if you’re not on the same page. Thanks for watching, Gaby!
Woa this really awakened something in me! Or rather, validated something that the world taught me to neglect. I’m thinking about a Christian girl right now and how much id like to do a courtship situation with her and how that’s all I’ve ever wanted. Growing up, I had a lot of experiences of girls wanting more physical intimacy with me than I was willing to give. So much negativity grew from them. I’m glad that this exists! Thank you
Thank you for this video and wisdom! I plan to incorporate all three especially financial boundary never heard before and I’m glad I came across this. Lord I pray to help me honor you and your son and the relationship you have for us when it comes in Jesus name amen
Hey Jamie! Love this video because my dating experiences the past 4 years have been horrible. I realize I've been attracting non-believers. I'll meet a guy and he would tell me he's Christian but when I talk about "waiting till marriage" or inviting him to church, I immediately noticed the changes. I'm glad you mentioned these tips because I am going to keep these in mind to help me when my future husband comes along. Physical boundaries and finances are the areas I will incorporate in my future relationship.
Thanks for sharing, Medline. Your experience sounds so similar to a lot of other christian women I’ve spoken with. It’s so important not to just go off what people say, but observe their lifestyle and character as well. I’m thankful because it sounds like you recognized that. Yea, these boundaries can help a lot. But, ultimately it’s God who will carry you through. Submit and trust Him fully when the time comes. 💕
I talked to my dad about waiting til marriage I said I want to be obedient to GOD because I know it will be healthy and rewarding I’ve learned so much on why I should wait and I know I can do it because it’s something I want to do. This is how you eliminate whos suppose to be in your life and who’s not if your morals and Christian values run them away consider it a blessing in disguise because sometimes the devil send things in form of what we ask GOD for. We will find our person we just have to keep praying and waiting
"Sex inside marriage is a place where it can be SAFELY burned and not consumed" I loved this. We always here no sex before marriage, but no logically reasons as to why! Loved this
Thanks for this! I definitely plan to incorporate all 3 boundaries whenever I get into a relationship but I haven’t even thought of the financial boundary.
Yea the boundaries definitely have to be established early on and stick with them firmly and a I agree with him it’s a reason go reserved that for marriage I’ve had it and children as a result outside of marriage and I choose not to anymore and wait because it does have detrimental effects and it’s easy to feel condemnation but I’m working on that
Amen for setting boundaries. Remember that God is always faithful to forgive us our sins when we repent. There’s no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus - whenever I struggle with feeling guilty over sin I read scripture like 1 John 2 to help me remember If I’ve truly put my faith in Christ - His finishing work on the cross continues to cleanse and renew me. Praying this encourages you!
My kids are teens and I’m going to show them this video but I’d love to see this type of video geared towards teens like advice for teens because it seems it’s geared towards young adults. Great perspectives and video thanks.
I love that idea! You’re right most of our videos are geared towards young adults, but teens need and are hungry for truth too. Maybe we can do a teen series. Thanks for watching!
nice video, never thought about this things before, I didn't realize before that you could talk about finances boundaries, never been in a relationship before 👍 and i mean, I had never thought about living reality before, i mean, real life, I thought that I had to waste my money taking her to the best restaurants and buying things that exceed my budget
Watching all the way from Kenya🇰🇪 thanks so much for this , I pray that God will give me the grace to pass through all the traps by the enemy and to put my relationship under God ,him being the Centre of it .I want my relationship to please the heart of God. And no weapon fashioned against us shall prosper. God bless you 🙏
Boundaries are key. A healthy relationship must include boundaries and open communication. Just a quick question. How long was your courtship before engagement and then engagement to marriage?
I like the idea of waiting to kiss the partner before marriage it seems sweet and thoughtful, plus if you wouldn’t kiss the same gender on the lips it implies it is a sexually related act in your mind; not in of itself is kissing on the lips sexual because other cultures same sex kiss in a non sexual way. But if you wouldn’t do it with the same gender it suggest it is a sexual expression for you meaning reserving it for marriage is wise for you.
Personal devotion. Really seeking to obey God, but returning to Him when we stray. You have to know the Holy Spirit and have sense of conviction when you start thinking selfishly. It’s not a fruit of the Spirit
I really like the finance one! It’s important to lay it all out on the table - especially how dates will be paid… can’t have too many unspoken expectations. I also have no sex/sexual activities before marriage as a boundry, but never thought about no kissing or hugging. Very interesting!
Thank you for sharing and watching, Jordyn! Hugging and kissing definitely isn’t a law or commandment, but something that helped us keep our focus on God and just flee temptation easier. Hope this helps!🙏🏾
Thank you! tip no. 3 is really helpful for me bec I've been struggling with physical touch and like hugging 😢 we're not yet official yet we are hugging each other already
Yes we've watch this together last night and both agreed to follow these boundaries specially interms of physical while we were on our dating stage up until relationship stage. Hopefully God will guide us along the way. We will keep God the center of our relationship 🙏
🙏🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥GREAT content! 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿 I think all three points you mentioned are vital... 1. God > The relationship 2. Financial Boundaries and 3. Physical Boundaries. Soooooo good!! 🙏🏿🙌🏿👏🏿. May I add a bonus? 4. Emotional Boundaries. While I’m not married, I know emotional intimacy can cause people to feel so close they don’t want to walk away from something toxic or just not right from them. This is especially a big deal in the beginning.
Thank you B!!! 😘😘😘 And absolutely! We need all the wisdom, share with the people. I agree, emotional boundaries are essential as well. I find that this could look different for different couples depending on the situation. But like @Darlene mentioned below: - Have self control over how long you’re spending on phone with your bf/gf. Set a limit & make sure you the time you spend together is healthy and God Glorifying. -In every circumstance, I think we have to make sure we’re not emotionally acting beyond our actual/spiritual level of commitment. Don’t treat your bf/gf like you’re married emotionally until you’re actually married.
This is good 👍🏽 my mistake was not setting boundaries in the relationship and it almost lead to sex. Like you said the relationship should be to glorify God.
Agreed - thank you for watching Katina! Setting boundaries and having honest conversations about if what we were doing glorified God changed everything.
I have a question, what if we go to different churches? Do I as the woman go to the man's church, or does he come to mine? What's more appropriate for us as Chirstian teenagers?
Good question and it’s super encouraging that you’re asking questions like this as a teenager. Consider continuing to attend separate churches until you are adults or engaged/married. This a super important time for you to focus on your relationship with God and spending time with one another in community. That might look like going to some of his events and vice versa.
first held his hand a little under 2 years, but the hugging?? lord Jesus its dangerous!!!! we kissed once honestly and once we realized what we did I fell to my knees before him and begged for his forgiveness, I started wailing so hard you'd think someone died, the look on his face was pure dread even though he was trying to comfort me about it. he eventually asked if it would make me feel better if we prayed about it and we did right then and there. now I'm on a week fasting asking God for guidance. staying pure until marriage is the top priority for us both, please keep us in your prayers.
Wow, Malli, your heart and desire to please God is so beautiful. Definitely will be praying for you both to flee temptation - what helped us was seeking God, praying and serving those in need as much as we could. Be quick to repent like it sounds like you both did and be honest with the Lord about your struggles - He can handle it and wants you to be your comfort in those moments. ❤️
Thank you for this video! For me, I have a 10pm boundary where I won't be alone (in person or by phone) with a guy that's not a family member. We can be in a group setting, but I avoid alone time. I feel like our guards decrease the later it gets because our bodies begin to go into rest mode. Being in different time zones can make this challenging, but it's not impossible to find a solution to it.
@Shelly, I think that’s a very wise boundary! Ultimately, the goal is to please God - anything we can do to put ourselves in a good position to do this is needed.
Can a person who is a Christian an is in a relationship but not married but they live in the same house but sleep in different bed rooms is that ok or it’s wrong ?????
Hey Kalayah and Rosh! First, thank you for watching and asking this question. Sometimes it’s difficult to answer the question around if something is right or wrong especially when that specific situation isn’t in the bible. But we can definitely use God’s word as a guide to help us understand what he wants us to do. I think it’s a good idea to ask instead, does this (fill in the blank) bring God glory? Technically you both can live under the same roof in separate rooms and bring God glory through choosing to wait before having sex with each other until you’re married. Even if you’ve already had sex before - God is honored when Christians repent and genuinely practice what His word teaches. I think overall it’s wiser to live in separate homes simply because it’s one less way to be tempted. (Romans 13:14) Let’s be real the flesh is weak, but the Spirit is willing. (Matthew 26:42) It’s definitely worth it to make a momentary sacrifice of living separately to grow in your faith and see the amazing things God does. At the end of the day, God reigns. So please pray about your decision and no matter what trust and obey God. Even if it’s hard, it’s always worth it in the end. I suggest reading Romans 13: 8 - 14. Praying for you both and hope this helps. 🙏🏾
Loved this J! How about spiritual boundaries? When would you recommend a couple starts studying the Bible together and praying together when they start dating...Idk if I’m thinking too much into it but I think they should be a boundary there.
Juliet! Thank you for watching!❤️ And yes, great question. This was by no means an exhaustive list, but the 3 that really helped us. I think i’m terms of spiritually, it’d be best to either refer to what I wrote about emotional boundaries below (comment under Dr. Bertrhude Albert) and/or the first point about putting God before yourselves. This kind of involves three because there is a physical component as well. There’s no biblical law or rules for how much time a couple’s who is dating should spend reading the bible together, but scripture does give us wisdom we can use to inform that decision - like Colossians 3:5. If we find ourselves getting tempted to dishonor God, that’s the limit. Stop. But I’d encourage an honest conversation before it even gets to that point about what are each person’s temptations. Hope this helps 😊
I agree with Jamie and I’ll add: Study marriage first. How does God answer these questions: What is marriage? Why is marriage? When should you marry? Understand that this is what your relationship should be working TOWARDS. Be careful of acting married while only dating. Your boundaries should reflect this truth.
I've had sex with my boyfriend,about 3 times. We are good Christians,we love the Lord and we're trying to do right now. I love him and I don't want to hurt him as I'm his first girlfriend ever. I think we need to breakup and seek God individually,you know, just stay as friends. He doesn't want me to break up with him and think we can seek God together and grow. To think that we haven't even been dating for so long. We're both in med school and are not ready to settle down till a few years. I'm so confused. Please I need help and advice.
Hey Joyce, you definitely are not the only Christian going through this. It takes a lot to reach out for help, so appreciate you asking for advice. As your sister in Christ, I want to remind you both the ultimate goal is always to honor God first. It sounds like you’re already aware of that from your response. I encourage you to move in the way that will bring Him the most glory. The temporary sacrifice I believe will be worth it if it means you both will be more focused and healthy spiritually. Time apart can make space for clarity. Is this a relationship you should even be in? Allow God to be the main voice directing you (through his word and wise counsel). Move in repentance and run towards grace. I encourage you to read and pray through Luke 14. Here for you, Jamie
Good question, it’s not the only reason why we’re together, but it is a central and the main reason. We have similar values, interests, and goals. But our faith in Jesus Christ is 100% what keeps our relationship heathy and keeps us humbled to continue loving each other.
That’s very interesting. We weren’t brought up as Christians, but I’m very thankful that it didn’t stop God from revealing His redeeming Gospel and saving us.
Thank you for watching! What's one boundary you can put into place now (whether or not you're in a relationship) that will have the future you saying "thank you!"? 😌
Jamie J. Edwards being more consistent in my finances. I’ve been on the journey for a while and remaining consistent will be key for me.
So so so good. Finances is one of those things that I think we tend to put on the back burner until it’s really late. Being intentional in that area is definitely going to pay off. Keep going 👏🏾
Really been focusing on getting my finances right
Not going to each other house period 😆
On the real! The freaks come out at night in that twilight state of semi consciousness.
1. Make sure the relationship is God-focused rather than you-focused.
2. Have financial boundaries.
3. Set physical boundaries
man y’all spitting facts!! “Make sure your relationship is God focused, not YOU focused. That doesn’t mean your relationship isn’t first priority, but that God is first priority in your relationship.”
🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
Thank you for taking to the time watch and listen Allie!
I’m here for this!! 😍 A helpful boundary for us currently, especially being long distance, is not talking late at night - it guards our hearts, helps us have energy for work/school the next day, and *boom boom* allows us to wake up early to seek the Lord!!
Oooo, I love that! So good and practical. I always wondered what we were some challenges unique to long distance couples 🤔 Thanks for sharing 💜
👏🏿👏🏿🙏🏿🙌🏿🙏🏿👏🏿🙏🏿🙌🏿🙏🏿👏🏿🙏🏿🙌🏿🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
I really thought this was a stretch at first but tried it out and it feels amazing
Hi! when do you talk then? I'm in a long distance relationship too and the only free time in common we have is at night; so we call each other at night but it really affects our sleep schedule. It ain't a problem since it doesn't cause us to stumble but it does ruin our agenda a bit. Any advice? :)
But I’m at the point where I don’t mind talking at night but everything has to be intentional whenever we talk most times
I am young and I gave my life to Christ a year ago,and I’m choosing to wait untill I’m out of college to even date,and wait untill marriage to have any intimacy. I will be applying all these tips to my future relationship because they are all reasonable!! Thank you!!☺️
Good for you! And welcome to the family of God 🙂
😌
Date in college, there’s many people and opportunity to meet a great one
I've had bad relationships in the past, but I've begun praying for a future spouse that loves God more than me. And knowing that God places us in relationships to glorify Him has been eye-opening for me!! When the time arrives, I've also made up my mind to only be at their place, if there are other people about, friends/roommates/family, etc., or be alone only while the curtains are open, in sight of a window.
You've also made me realise that it's okay to restrain from kissing and hugging for a while. I'm now content with the idea of agreeing to abstain from kissing until marriage if my future partner desires to.
Thank you both!!
Praying for you Sorcha, that in both singleness and every relationship God draws you deeper. Thank you for watching 😊
"Boundaries are limits. They draw the line and say, we don't go beyond this point."
🔥🔥
Marriage to glorify God! Amen!!
If only the younger version of myself could've listened to this video I could've avoided a lot of compromises made in my walk with God while dating. This is really good and really important content.
Thank you for watching, Engineered By God. And that’s a huge reason we wanted to share our experience because there were some things we did right and somethings we didn’t that we wanted to spare others if possible. Thanks again for the support.
Praise God for your testimony!!
This is beautiful! Thank you!!!!!!💓🤗😍😍🤗
Been focusing on getting my finances right, not going to each other's houses, making sure that the relationship is Christ centered and set physical boundaries as well
Wow what an honor to have a man who respects your boundaries and his yours. Especially sexually. This is truly something I dream of having.
Great advice!
I like the insight that you want to be able to walk away without a soul tie in case it doesn't work. And keeping the emotions in check helps by not hugging, atleast before engagement
Thanks guys 😊
I have never thought about these other points (point 1and 2) before. Anytime I hear relationship boundaries, I only think physical boundaries.
I have never been into a relationship but these would help when I get into one.
Yes, us too! People normally stress physical boundaries, which I get. But spiritual, emotional and financial boundaries are also important. Thanks for watching and sharing!
Thank you!
Great pieces of information here!! Great video!
Thanks for watching Chris!💜
Thus was super awesome. Super short. But l loved it. Thank you
Thanks for watching and for the kind words, Samantha! What topics would you like to hear us cover in the future?
Sound advice, God bless and thank you for sharing🙏🏾
Glad it was helpful!
This was great! Glory to God! 🙌🏾🙏🏾
Thank you for watching @Shiquetta! Amen!
I really needed this, it came at the right time ⌚.. Praise be to God 🛐🙏!! Nice Video Guys 👏👏
Amen!
I love when you said to basically watch what we are doing so we do not get caught up with someone else's spouse.
Thanks Symphony! It’s true, I kept reminding myself of that while we were courting - we aren’t married until we’re married. Thanks for watching!
I definitely think waiting until it's right and you've really built a solid foundation is smart, but physical chemistry is a big deal and I'd definitely want to know that I'm physically compatible with someone before marrying them - that's me personally. Also, I'm a hugger by nature so you're getting hugs right away - whether you're a platonic friend or potentially husband material.
Wow this is so inspirational, God bless you guys💜💜
Thank you!
I love what you’re doing guys,❤️just keep it up 👍🏾 I pray that God bless your marriage.🙏🏾
That's why God says don't be unequally yoked together. If you both have the dame beliefs then you can keep each other strong
Love this 💕
Agreed!
loved that you guys spoke on finances... the importance of speaking on this subject as early as early can be is so good to recognize! thank you both and may God bless your marriage :) love from south florida
Yes, talking about finances definitely helped to prepare us to get comfortable talking about things that can get super awkward quick if you’re not on the same page. Thanks for watching, Gaby!
@12:22 Wow, that’s a great point! I will keep that in the back of my mind.
Thank you for watching!
@@JamieJEdwards No problem!
Woa this really awakened something in me! Or rather, validated something that the world taught me to neglect. I’m thinking about a Christian girl right now and how much id like to do a courtship situation with her and how that’s all I’ve ever wanted. Growing up, I had a lot of experiences of girls wanting more physical intimacy with me than I was willing to give. So much negativity grew from them. I’m glad that this exists! Thank you
You're welcome! Thanks for watching
I have been helped! God totally directed me to this direction and am grateful🙌.
Amen!
Thank you for this video and wisdom! I plan to incorporate all three especially financial boundary never heard before and I’m glad I came across this. Lord I pray to help me honor you and your son and the relationship you have for us when it comes in Jesus name amen
So glad this is helpful for you!
This was great!
Thanks Mystrame!😆💕
Opened the eyes of my heart! Thank you. So be it. 💚
Amen! Thank you for watching, Lameaysyia!
This is my first time on your channel I really enjoyed this video when I get into a relationship I’ll remember these tips God bless you both 🙏🏾
So thankful you decided to watch and found our video helpful, Veronica! Blessings 😊
This was so honest and straight forward and really helpful! Thank you! God bless you two
So thankful you found this helpful, Lilia! Thank you for the kind words and encouragement.
Really nice video...so informative. This is the first video of yours I've watched. Thank you so much💛
So happy to have you as a new viewer, Shekinah! And thank you for the kind words. 😊
love this. very reaffirming that my bf & I are doing well
Y’all can do it! Hold one another accountable!
Hey Jamie! Love this video because my dating experiences the past 4 years have been horrible. I realize I've been attracting non-believers. I'll meet a guy and he would tell me he's Christian but when I talk about "waiting till marriage" or inviting him to church, I immediately noticed the changes. I'm glad you mentioned these tips because I am going to keep these in mind to help me when my future husband comes along. Physical boundaries and finances are the areas I will incorporate in my future relationship.
Thanks for sharing, Medline. Your experience sounds so similar to a lot of other christian women I’ve spoken with. It’s so important not to just go off what people say, but observe their lifestyle and character as well.
I’m thankful because it sounds like you recognized that. Yea, these boundaries can help a lot. But, ultimately it’s God who will carry you through. Submit and trust Him fully when the time comes. 💕
I talked to my dad about waiting til marriage I said I want to be obedient to GOD because I know it will be healthy and rewarding I’ve learned so much on why I should wait and I know I can do it because it’s something I want to do. This is how you eliminate whos suppose to be in your life and who’s not if your morals and Christian values run them away consider it a blessing in disguise because sometimes the devil send things in form of what we ask GOD for. We will find our person we just have to keep praying and waiting
Love this , thank you guys !
Thank you for watching and for the kind words, Diane!
"Sex inside marriage is a place where it can be SAFELY burned and not consumed" I loved this. We always here no sex before marriage, but no logically reasons as to why! Loved this
Thank you!
That man inspires me.
🙌🏿🙌🏿
I love it! So encouraging to know that it can be done!
We’re so thankful God could use our relationship to encourage someone! Thank you for watching Brooke!
Great advice but one way to avoid temptation during courting is to stop having these long worldly engagements.
Hey, are you referring to the engagement period?
Keep him, he’s great!! Thank you for this 🙌🏾
This was excellent! Thank you for being so transparent about being tempted and which boundaries were set at each stage in the relationship
So thankful you found our transparency helpful, JM! Thank you for watching!
Thanks for this! I definitely plan to incorporate all 3 boundaries whenever I get into a relationship but I haven’t even thought of the financial boundary.
Amen! So thankful this resonated with you and you plan on using them in your own relationship. Thanks for watching, Alaysha!
I was planning on doing everything and especially the physical boundaries
Nice!
All the Tipps
loved this one, especially talking about the finances , I never thought about that!
Yea, I knew you’d like the finance segment and it definitely helped us before and during marriage for sure. Thanks for watching, Rachelle!💜
Of course! Love your videos!
Yea the boundaries definitely have to be established early on and stick with them firmly and a I agree with him it’s a reason go reserved that for marriage I’ve had it and children as a result outside of marriage and I choose not to anymore and wait because it does have detrimental effects and it’s easy to feel condemnation but I’m working on that
Amen for setting boundaries. Remember that God is always faithful to forgive us our sins when we repent. There’s no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus - whenever I struggle with feeling guilty over sin I read scripture like 1 John 2 to help me remember If I’ve truly put my faith in Christ - His finishing work on the cross continues to cleanse and renew me. Praying this encourages you!
@@JamieJEdwards amen definitely will read that tonight ♥️
This was so informative. Great content guys.👍🏾
Thank you for watching Meesha! So thankful you found it helpful. 🤗💜
Thank you!
My kids are teens and I’m going to show them this video but I’d love to see this type of video geared towards teens like advice for teens because it seems it’s geared towards young adults. Great perspectives and video thanks.
I love that idea! You’re right most of our videos are geared towards young adults, but teens need and are hungry for truth too. Maybe we can do a teen series. Thanks for watching!
nice video, never thought about this things before, I didn't realize before that you could talk about finances boundaries, never been in a relationship before 👍 and i mean, I had never thought about living reality before, i mean, real life, I thought that I had to waste my money taking her to the best restaurants and buying things that exceed my budget
Nope! The relationship has to be about your lives together, glorifying God - that’s the realest thing of all!
As a 15 yr old definitely Godly wisdom
Watching all the way from Kenya🇰🇪 thanks so much for this , I pray that God will give me the grace to pass through all the traps by the enemy and to put my relationship under God ,him being the Centre of it .I want my relationship to please the heart of God. And no weapon fashioned against us shall prosper. God bless you 🙏
Thank you for watching, Esther! Praying for you that you would keep God at the center always 🙏🏾
Amen 🙏 thank you too
Beautiful godly couple, thank you for sharing your story and advice :)
Thank you for the kind words Nicole and thank you for watching!
Thank you
You're welcome
Encouraging!! Love itt! 💯🙌🏿
Thank you for the kind words!
Boundaries are key. A healthy relationship must include boundaries and open communication. Just a quick question. How long was your courtship before engagement and then engagement to marriage?
Thank you for watching, Vicky! We agree.
Javier and I courted for 11 months and were engaged for 10 months before we got married.
I would love to discuss this with my future husband. Loved this!
Definitely encourage you to. We have even more topics now that we wish we would’ve discussed lol. Thanks for watching, Sofia!
@@JamieJEdwards thank you
Great video!!
Thank youuuu! lol
Thanks fam
I Love This
I love this video!
Thanks for watching Da!💜
🔥
I like the idea of waiting to kiss the partner before marriage it seems sweet and thoughtful, plus if you wouldn’t kiss the same gender on the lips it implies it is a sexually related act in your mind; not in of itself is kissing on the lips sexual because other cultures same sex kiss in a non sexual way. But if you wouldn’t do it with the same gender it suggest it is a sexual expression for you meaning reserving it for marriage is wise for you.
This video is so spot on! God, finance, physical... Makes a whole lotta sense!
Great summary! Thanks for watching Jemimah :)
Any other topics you’d like to see us cover?
How about something on moving on after a breakup?.. Needing therapy, how important it is, or not.@@JamieJEdwards
I really like this idea! Thank you for sharing - adding it to a list of topics now.
What’s are some daily things you guys did to make sure you stayed God focused and not you focused
Personal devotion. Really seeking to obey God, but returning to Him when we stray. You have to know the Holy Spirit and have sense of conviction when you start thinking selfishly. It’s not a fruit of the Spirit
I really like the finance one! It’s important to lay it all out on the table - especially how dates will be paid… can’t have too many unspoken expectations.
I also have no sex/sexual activities before marriage as a boundry, but never thought about no kissing or hugging. Very interesting!
Thank you for sharing and watching, Jordyn! Hugging and kissing definitely isn’t a law or commandment, but something that helped us keep our focus on God and just flee temptation easier. Hope this helps!🙏🏾
This content was very Good , I would do love to see like male and female perspectives on , what you were looking for in a spouse . New Subbie btw !
I love that idea! I’ll be adding it to our list of topics. Thank you for watching and subscribing, Dynamic Daughter!
Hi jamie
Hi 😆
I will apply all
Amen! 🙏🏾
Thank you! tip no. 3 is really helpful for me bec I've been struggling with physical touch and like hugging 😢 we're not yet official yet we are hugging each other already
Thanks for watching and sharing. Definitely encourage you to get clear on the status and direction of the relationship.
Yes we've watch this together last night and both agreed to follow these boundaries specially interms of physical while we were on our dating stage up until relationship stage. Hopefully God will guide us along the way. We will keep God the center of our relationship 🙏
@@drakejane8358 Praying for you both!
🙏🏿🙌🏿🙌🏿🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥GREAT content! 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿 I think all three points you mentioned are vital... 1. God > The relationship 2. Financial Boundaries and 3. Physical Boundaries. Soooooo good!! 🙏🏿🙌🏿👏🏿. May I add a bonus? 4. Emotional
Boundaries. While I’m not married, I know emotional intimacy can cause people to feel so close they don’t want to walk away from something toxic or just not right from them. This is especially a big deal in the beginning.
Thank you B!!! 😘😘😘
And absolutely! We need all the wisdom, share with the people. I agree, emotional boundaries are essential as well. I find that this could look different for different couples depending on the situation.
But like @Darlene mentioned below:
- Have self control over how long you’re spending on phone with your bf/gf. Set a limit & make sure you the time you spend together is healthy and God Glorifying.
-In every circumstance, I think we have to make sure we’re not emotionally acting beyond our actual/spiritual level of commitment.
Don’t treat your bf/gf like you’re married emotionally until you’re actually married.
Great thoughts B!
That’s good B!
Amen.
🙏🏾
How long did y’all date before getting married??
We dated/courted for 11 months and we were engaged for 10 months before we got married. So about 2 years.
This is good 👍🏽 my mistake was not setting boundaries in the relationship and it almost lead to sex. Like you said the relationship should be to glorify God.
Agreed - thank you for watching Katina! Setting boundaries and having honest conversations about if what we were doing glorified God changed everything.
I have a question, what if we go to different churches? Do I as the woman go to the man's church, or does he come to mine? What's more appropriate for us as Chirstian teenagers?
Good question and it’s super encouraging that you’re asking questions like this as a teenager. Consider continuing to attend separate churches until you are adults or engaged/married.
This a super important time for you to focus on your relationship with God and spending time with one another in community. That might look like going to some of his events and vice versa.
💯💯
Awesome video! We want more!!
Thanks guys! Love that we can always count on your support 🤗
Thanks Tiff🙏🏿
I wouldn't say being cheap is a Christian value lol... but that's just me lol. Very motivating to hear about #3 thank you so much for sharing
Lol I wouldn’t say being cheap is a Christian value either, but being a good steward of what God has given us is.
Thanks for watching!
first held his hand a little under 2 years, but the hugging?? lord Jesus its dangerous!!!! we kissed once honestly and once we realized what we did I fell to my knees before him and begged for his forgiveness, I started wailing so hard you'd think someone died, the look on his face was pure dread even though he was trying to comfort me about it. he eventually asked if it would make me feel better if we prayed about it and we did right then and there. now I'm on a week fasting asking God for guidance. staying pure until marriage is the top priority for us both, please keep us in your prayers.
Wow, Malli, your heart and desire to please God is so beautiful. Definitely will be praying for you both to flee temptation - what helped us was seeking God, praying and serving those in need as much as we could. Be quick to repent like it sounds like you both did and be honest with the Lord about your struggles - He can handle it and wants you to be your comfort in those moments. ❤️
@@JamieJEdwards appreciated❤️🙏🏽
Thank you for this video! For me, I have a 10pm boundary where I won't be alone (in person or by phone) with a guy that's not a family member. We can be in a group setting, but I avoid alone time. I feel like our guards decrease the later it gets because our bodies begin to go into rest mode. Being in different time zones can make this challenging, but it's not impossible to find a solution to it.
@Shelly, I think that’s a very wise boundary! Ultimately, the goal is to please God - anything we can do to put ourselves in a good position to do this is needed.
Wow.
This is great.
I hope to incorporate this into my life.
I need some advice,
What do you need?
Can a person who is a Christian an is in a relationship but not married but they live in the same house but sleep in different bed rooms is that ok or it’s wrong ?????
Hey Kalayah and Rosh! First, thank you for watching and asking this question.
Sometimes it’s difficult to answer the question around if something is right or wrong especially when that specific situation isn’t in the bible. But we can definitely use God’s word as a guide to help us understand what he wants us to do.
I think it’s a good idea to ask instead, does this (fill in the blank) bring God glory?
Technically you both can live under the same roof in separate rooms and bring God glory through choosing to wait before having sex with each other until you’re married. Even if you’ve already had sex before - God is honored when Christians repent and genuinely practice what His word teaches.
I think overall it’s wiser to live in separate homes simply because it’s one less way to be tempted. (Romans 13:14)
Let’s be real the flesh is weak, but the Spirit is willing. (Matthew 26:42)
It’s definitely worth it to make a momentary sacrifice of living separately to grow in your faith and see the amazing things God does.
At the end of the day, God reigns. So please pray about your decision and no matter what trust and obey God. Even if it’s hard, it’s always worth it in the end.
I suggest reading Romans 13: 8 - 14.
Praying for you both and hope this helps. 🙏🏾
“How are we saving for marriage” >
Loved this J! How about spiritual boundaries? When would you recommend a couple starts studying the Bible together and praying together when they start dating...Idk if I’m thinking too much into it but I think they should be a boundary there.
Juliet! Thank you for watching!❤️ And yes, great question. This was by no means an exhaustive list, but the 3 that really helped us.
I think i’m terms of spiritually, it’d be best to either refer to what I wrote about emotional boundaries below (comment under Dr. Bertrhude Albert) and/or the first point about putting God before yourselves.
This kind of involves three because there is a physical component as well. There’s no biblical law or rules for how much time a couple’s who is dating should spend reading the bible together, but scripture does give us wisdom we can use to inform that decision - like Colossians 3:5.
If we find ourselves getting tempted to dishonor God, that’s the limit. Stop. But I’d encourage an honest conversation before it even gets to that point about what are each person’s temptations. Hope this helps 😊
I agree with Jamie and I’ll add:
Study marriage first. How does God answer these questions:
What is marriage?
Why is marriage?
When should you marry?
Understand that this is what your relationship should be working TOWARDS. Be careful of acting married while only dating. Your boundaries should reflect this truth.
Cmon Godly couple!
Thanks Vava!❤️
Thank Val 😭
One boundary I'd love to put is "no sleep overs"
I've had sex with my boyfriend,about 3 times. We are good Christians,we love the Lord and we're trying to do right now. I love him and I don't want to hurt him as I'm his first girlfriend ever. I think we need to breakup and seek God individually,you know, just stay as friends. He doesn't want me to break up with him and think we can seek God together and grow. To think that we haven't even been dating for so long. We're both in med school and are not ready to settle down till a few years. I'm so confused. Please I need help and advice.
Hey Joyce, you definitely are not the only Christian going through this. It takes a lot to reach out for help, so appreciate you asking for advice.
As your sister in Christ, I want to remind you both the ultimate goal is always to honor God first. It sounds like you’re already aware of that from your response. I encourage you to move in the way that will bring Him the most glory. The temporary sacrifice I believe will be worth it if it means you both will be more focused and healthy spiritually.
Time apart can make space for clarity. Is this a relationship you should even be in? Allow God to be the main voice directing you (through his word and wise counsel).
Move in repentance and run towards grace.
I encourage you to read and pray through Luke 14. Here for you, Jamie
This is God focused. Some so called Christian advisors encourage sleep overs.
How old we’re you guys when y’all met??
Hey LENTZY! I was 23 and my hubby was
24 when we met. Wow, I didn’t realize it was that long ago lol
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Just a question from something that came across from your comments. Are y'all really only together because you believe in the same god?
Good question, it’s not the only reason why we’re together, but it is a central and the main reason. We have similar values, interests, and goals. But our faith in Jesus Christ is 100% what keeps our relationship heathy and keeps us humbled to continue loving each other.
God will judge all fornicators
God will judge EVERYONE. Either justified by Christ’s blood or condemned.
I was brought up with this line of thought for 20 years. It's silly y'all.
That’s very interesting. We weren’t brought up as Christians, but I’m very thankful that it didn’t stop God from revealing His redeeming Gospel and saving us.
Just need a true partner.
3:50 wtf
Jesus loves us equally,,but if you play with your body you will also bear the consequences