I actually first heard the term asexual from a friend a little over a year ago, when I looked it up later that day I knew I had found my orientation, after having given up on doing so the year before. I felt better learning about asexuality
I never thought of the "asexuals must be so productive" thing in that sense, but I still hate it. The assumption is that the time and energy allos put into relationships, asexuals must have nothing to do with except work harder. It plays into the idea that we're missing out or have less fulfilling lives. As an aro-ace, I really don't spend any time on romantic relationships, but I assure you I'm no more productive than anyone else. I fill up my free time with the things *I* get fulfilment from. Like fantasy novels, and Dungeons and Dragons, and cats.
I am an older asexual. I have found your video to be very helpful. I am planning on posting to TH-cam to put my story and perspective out there. Thank you for the information and encouragement.
Lol sometimes people sexualize me when I wear certain pieces of clothing and I just kind of internally laugh at them. I just think of how I’d like to see them try lol. Ain’t gonna happen.
The Times can definitely help to reach out to more diverse readers who probably wouldn’t otherwise learn about the term Asexuality on their own, that’s pretty cool!
I really liked the article personally although I do see how the parts you mentioned could be an issue. I love how the author tries to cover as much as she can though, as you said I also get the feel from the article that Stefanie was genuinely trying her best to understand asexuality and how ace people affect and are affected by society. Really appreciate this representation in The Times, also thank you for contributing to it!
I find the notion that Aces are more productive because we’re not focused on sex somewhat humorous. Like, damn I kinda wish it was true because I am not productive at all. lol I might not be thinking about sex, but that leaves plenty of time to just sit in my room letting my anxiety replay an awkward moment from Jr High School over and over in my mind. 😅
Thank you very much for adding subtitles for all my deaf, hard of hearing, and otherwise hearing-impaired friends - I am not hard of hearing myself, but as someone who is almost always in a busy environment with lots of noise, I can tell you that it is much appreciated.
You're welcome! I try my best to write proper subtitles whenever I have time so it can be as accessible as possible 😊 Plus, I tend to mumble quite a bit sometimes 😅
Great video, good to finally see broader exposure! On a random note, I came out to my friends for the first time this week and they were super accepting so yay!!
Anonymous Girl for me it was just the situation- we were talking about sexuality and I just said I wasn’t straight, I was ace and explained what that means to me. Just go for it honestly, hopefully it will work out ☺️
CaillieNotCali Thanks, to be honest, I’m a 15 year old heteroromantic asexual, so my plan is a bit different, I’ve never dated anyone yet, but if I do, and find myself in a situation where sex is expected from me, I’ll just explain kindly I’m not into it, I feel like if I tell my family, they won’t understand, it is better for me not to label as anything and just say I prefer not having sex. I mean, I’ll maybe tell my friends, because I’m sure they will understand, but not yet
Something you said resonated with me. Don't recall the wording, since I watched to the end, & my memory isn't the greatest, anymore. Apologies. For context, I'm an ace who is in her 50s. Due to assorted mental health problems stemming from emotional child abuse, I'd naively assumed thru highschool (1970s Midwestern US) that I was just running a decade behind everyone else, & would eventually start feeling emotional & physical sexual attraction. By college (1980 to 88), I'd conceded I wasn't like other people, & alternated between 2 terms I had invented: gender-neuter & gender-neutral, to described myself. I only learned the term asexual in the last 5 years, thru AVEN on Twitter. The memory I had during your video is this: I never had an emotional understanding of myself as female. I was always disconnected emotionally. What I knew about "decent" presentation of the female body, I gleaned off TV. This was one of many subjects my older parents apparently expected me to learn by osmosis. My grade school still paddled as punishment; they certainly weren't going to educate girls about physical modesty. They apparently assumed parents taught that. So, like I said, I learned from TV movies. And, by the time my upper body was developing, I honestly thought that if my parts were covered (underwear & folded arms, for example), I was decently presented. So, one day, I wandered out of my bedroom while my father was upstairs talking to my mother. I was naked except for underpants, so I folded my arms carefully covering my breasts. As far as I was concerned, I was now "decent." My father didn't see it that way, & retreated to the stairs, so he wouldn't see me. I heard my name not as a complaint, but as a request to talk, so approached him again, innocently asking: "What?" Again, because I didn't have the slightest comprehension what I was doing was "indecent", because I was emotionally disassociated from my apparent gender! It was also during this time that I was very jealous of boys, since no one cared if *they* were half naked, or not!
Thank you for sharing your story! I'm also jealous of boys for that reason, and thats why I support #FreeTheNipple I really missed being outside and playing without a shirt on, but then boobs happened
It's a funny thing what happened with your dad and you. 😄 It really all must make so much more sense now, and I'm glad you are more comforted by these new words to describe ourselves. I also think it's brilliant that you came up with those two gender terms for yourself at the time. Much love to you 💛
@@MargauxNeedler The best thing about having my own place & living alone is that I can now dress how *I* want!! As long as my blinds are closed, who cares, right?
@@SliceOfAce 😊 that's great, I wasn't trying to be invisible or even a little discreet. Can't refrain from expressing opinions at the moment they come to mind. Nice channel. Asexuality needs more representation. I am glad your generation is taking us there. It's also beautiful to watch.....you didn't have to spend your adolescence or early adult years wondering what was broken within you, or being branded with various inept DSM logos
I actually first heard the term asexual from a friend a little over a year ago, when I looked it up later that day I knew I had found my orientation, after having given up on doing so the year before. I felt better learning about asexuality
I never thought of the "asexuals must be so productive" thing in that sense, but I still hate it. The assumption is that the time and energy allos put into relationships, asexuals must have nothing to do with except work harder. It plays into the idea that we're missing out or have less fulfilling lives.
As an aro-ace, I really don't spend any time on romantic relationships, but I assure you I'm no more productive than anyone else. I fill up my free time with the things *I* get fulfilment from. Like fantasy novels, and Dungeons and Dragons, and cats.
Fantasy novels, D&D, and cats are all very fulfilling things 😁
I am an older asexual. I have found your video to be very helpful. I am planning on posting to TH-cam to put my story and perspective out there. Thank you for the information and encouragement.
I'd be happy to share your video if you'd like? Feel free to send me a link when it's up 😊
i wanna wear cool things like fishnet tights and gloves and croptops but i hate coming across as sexy this is horrible sdfhgdf
Don't worry bro you do you!! WEAR DEM COOL FISHNETS im sure you'll look great!!
@@rainnymph i do love me some cool fishy nets!! you're right!! thank u :'3c
@@madgadgetss iz okayyy :D
Lol sometimes people sexualize me when I wear certain pieces of clothing and I just kind of internally laugh at them. I just think of how I’d like to see them try lol. Ain’t gonna happen.
The Times can definitely help to reach out to more diverse readers who probably wouldn’t otherwise learn about the term Asexuality on their own, that’s pretty cool!
Colon: "I think it's un-natural"
Vetinary: "So you eat your meat raw?"
I really liked the article personally although I do see how the parts you mentioned could be an issue. I love how the author tries to cover as much as she can though, as you said I also get the feel from the article that Stefanie was genuinely trying her best to understand asexuality and how ace people affect and are affected by society. Really appreciate this representation in The Times, also thank you for contributing to it!
I find the notion that Aces are more productive because we’re not focused on sex somewhat humorous. Like, damn I kinda wish it was true because I am not productive at all. lol
I might not be thinking about sex, but that leaves plenty of time to just sit in my room letting my anxiety replay an awkward moment from Jr High School over and over in my mind. 😅
Thank you very much for adding subtitles for all my deaf, hard of hearing, and otherwise hearing-impaired friends - I am not hard of hearing myself, but as someone who is almost always in a busy environment with lots of noise, I can tell you that it is much appreciated.
You're welcome! I try my best to write proper subtitles whenever I have time so it can be as accessible as possible 😊 Plus, I tend to mumble quite a bit sometimes 😅
Great video, good to finally see broader exposure! On a random note, I came out to my friends for the first time this week and they were super accepting so yay!!
CaillieNotCali
Any tips?
Anonymous Girl for me it was just the situation- we were talking about sexuality and I just said I wasn’t straight, I was ace and explained what that means to me. Just go for it honestly, hopefully it will work out ☺️
CaillieNotCali
Thanks, to be honest, I’m a 15 year old heteroromantic asexual, so my plan is a bit different, I’ve never dated anyone yet, but if I do, and find myself in a situation where sex is expected from me, I’ll just explain kindly I’m not into it, I feel like if I tell my family, they won’t understand, it is better for me not to label as anything and just say I prefer not having sex.
I mean, I’ll maybe tell my friends, because I’m sure they will understand, but not yet
@@annymus4502 aww, good luck! Anyone who responds negatively can screw off
You're not any less amazing, Daniel!
Haha, tell that to the voice in my head 😅
Thanks for bringing this to us, great summary, I’m definitely going to find the article online now, flawed but worthwhile as you suggest.
Something you said resonated with me. Don't recall the wording, since I watched to the end, & my memory isn't the greatest, anymore. Apologies.
For context, I'm an ace who is in her 50s.
Due to assorted mental health problems stemming from emotional child abuse, I'd naively assumed thru highschool (1970s Midwestern US) that I was just running a decade behind everyone else, & would eventually start feeling emotional & physical sexual attraction.
By college (1980 to 88), I'd conceded I wasn't like other people, & alternated between 2 terms I had invented: gender-neuter & gender-neutral, to described myself.
I only learned the term asexual in the last 5 years, thru AVEN on Twitter.
The memory I had during your video is this:
I never had an emotional understanding of myself as female. I was always disconnected emotionally.
What I knew about "decent" presentation of the female body, I gleaned off TV. This was one of many subjects my older parents apparently expected me to learn by osmosis. My grade school still paddled as punishment; they certainly weren't going to educate girls about physical modesty. They apparently assumed parents taught that.
So, like I said, I learned from TV movies. And, by the time my upper body was developing, I honestly thought that if my parts were covered (underwear & folded arms, for example), I was decently presented.
So, one day, I wandered out of my bedroom while my father was upstairs talking to my mother. I was naked except for underpants, so I folded my arms carefully covering my breasts. As far as I was concerned, I was now "decent."
My father didn't see it that way, & retreated to the stairs, so he wouldn't see me. I heard my name not as a complaint, but as a request to talk, so approached him again, innocently asking: "What?"
Again, because I didn't have the slightest comprehension what I was doing was "indecent", because I was emotionally disassociated from my apparent gender!
It was also during this time that I was very jealous of boys, since no one cared if *they* were half naked, or not!
Thank you for sharing your story! I'm also jealous of boys for that reason, and thats why I support #FreeTheNipple I really missed being outside and playing without a shirt on, but then boobs happened
It's a funny thing what happened with your dad and you. 😄 It really all must make so much more sense now, and I'm glad you are more comforted by these new words to describe ourselves. I also think it's brilliant that you came up with those two gender terms for yourself at the time. Much love to you 💛
@@MargauxNeedler The best thing about having my own place & living alone is that I can now dress how *I* want!! As long as my blinds are closed, who cares, right?
@@cathyvickers9063 right 😂
Yay ☺️ more representation
I am 39 years old soon 40 years old and I identify as hetroflex-greyrose/hetroflex-greyaroace. so yes there is older people who is also asexual.
Really tired with the notion that all asexuals are young. Asexuality is not a gen z thing. It's a human thing.
Indeed! Are you enjoying binging my videos? 😂
@@SliceOfAce clearly yes...LOL
Haha, I just find it funny when I see someone comment on multiple videos in a short time frame and like to say hi 😁
@@SliceOfAce 😊 that's great, I wasn't trying to be invisible or even a little discreet. Can't refrain from expressing opinions at the moment they come to mind. Nice channel. Asexuality needs more representation. I am glad your generation is taking us there. It's also beautiful to watch.....you didn't have to spend your adolescence or early adult years wondering what was broken within you, or being branded with various inept DSM logos
I myself don't want sex all together its gross to me