April 8, 1990 - December 18, 2017
omfg
it was so damn hard to make this video bc the damn salty tears kept on making my eyes blurry af and i couldn't see my SCREEN.
but on a sadder, devastating topic, we lost a beautiful soul today :(
i was legit in maths class and i went on my phone to scroll though Facebook and i saw all these articles popping up and i couldn't process it at first but later on it started to hit me and i was like "this is actually happening" and i went into complete depresso mode.
some people think i'm over reacting and being stupid for crying and being upset over a kpop idol but, he's a human too and he had a beautiful personality. ;; it's not just him that's making me sad, but the fact that so many people could be dealing with what he was dealing with before he killed himself, and it just made me realise that mental illnesses arent a joke. it just mostly aches me to think about the the fact that he was silently suffering for so long and the concerns behind his acting and fake smiles. like he was going through so much bad stuff but he didn't tell anyone?? his mind was pretty much possessed with ghosts and negative stuff and it eventually it ended up making him take his own life in a rented hotel because if he wasn't at a rented hotel he would have probably been caught. and the fact that he was so sad that he even left his loved ones, like his sister and his family honestly hurts me because he must have been hurting so fricken bad. his note to his sister was like "tell everyone i suffered, this is my last greeting, please tell me i did well in life" hfiogiwrgioghwi he struggled so hard man i cant process it like
it hit me earlier that depression isnt a joke and im not even gonna make fun of that shet anymore because mental illnesses like that are serious and need to be dealt with. seriously i cant bloody process how he smiled and was so hyper on stage but so sad in the inside for so long and its a week before christmas??? he couldnt even bare the pain to even wait for christmas day omg what the fuck its so dark i cant stop thinking about that poor guy in the hotel room just poisoning himself to death, thats such a dark, gloomy way to die?!?!? the atmosphere in the room is so dark and its so painful to think about i dont even want to think about it because it puts my mind in a pit full of darkness but i cant stop and frickkk i just hate how his life had to end that way. ughruhgur this is such a gloomy day ,, he worked so hard and put on a smile for his fans every fucking day and its just paining my heart this whole thing hurts me i cant even imagine what he was feeling like this whole time and his family members currently :((
my prayers go out to his family, friends, SM, and all of his surroundings ♥️
you'll always be remembered ♥️
ig = @priyatalbot
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