วีดีโอ

My wife lost her voice last night,, I rushed home because I didn't want to miss it.😂😂😂😂

How does an asteroid have a wash???? With a meteor shower😂😂😂😂

I got home from work one day and sat on the sofa and I said to my wife, quick pass me a beer before it starts. She gets me a beer, then I said quick get me another beer before it starts, so she got me another one. Then I said quick get me another one before it starts, she said listen here now you fat lazy bastard you glcome home from work sit on your arse barking orders..... I replied 'Oh fuck, it's started.

It’s obviously sunny in Longforgan.

You're not talking from experience there by any chance are you 😂😂😂😂😂😂.

this the typa shit some random drunk cunt would say to me when i was 7 and at the pup way ma da😂

A fun fuct.

Totally unexpected and daft!😂😂😂😂😂

Lol!!

Shit.... I fucked up

That's great information, mine just stopped pumping water this weekend, the pump is going but no water coming out. I have always used the pink so hearing what you say I think that's the problem. Also thanks for showing me how to rectify.

News just in, doctors have discovered a food that if you eat it will cause pain and suffering for years to come!!!!! It's called a wedding cake.😂😂😂😂😂

Nice one :D

I have a 6 pack... It's on the fridge chilling for later. 😂

I was in town the other day and noticed a board saying penis enlargements, I turned to my missus and said there's a sign of things to cum.😂😂😂😂

I don’t get the joke😭your delivery was on point tho

I've never been to Glasgow I should have to come up and buy you a pint.😮

From what I can tell, yoga is all the effort and pain of putting your socks on, in different positions, without the benefit of actually getting your socks on.

Yes😂😂😂😂😂

Well I best not say much, don't want to get banned lol 😂😂😂

The second sign is looking for them

Hairs on the palm of your hand.

😂😂😂

1976 I think was the first sign of madness, 😂😂😂.

The carpet is getting divorced from the lino after the carpet had an affair with the laminate, on the divorce paper they stated there was too many floors in this relationship. 😂😂😂😂.

First time I need to ask you for subtitles for the punchline. I honestly have no idea what you said 😂

Visit Florida and I'll show you my column

We didn’t come from monkeys. Man and ape evolved from a common ancestor long ago. We developed in one direction and they developed in another. We are apes, they are apes. Case closed.

😂😂😂😂

Speak for yourself I came from my mother 😂😂😂

You are in a very nice area there.🎉.

🤣🤣🤣You climbing those steps 🤣Reminded me of the steps up to the tower of London when i had a proper vertigo attack and had to turn round and go back down. 🤣

Lovely place! My daughter went there about a year ago 🙂

I went to a fancy dress party dressed as a bed !!!, I made this one up 😢😢😢.

I was going to see the submarine in dry dock last time I was there, but my wife torpedoed that idea, 😢😢😢

What's blue and not very heavy?

You should go over to the bar and Block in the premier Inn, on the dockyard they do some superb food, it's expensive but very nice. 😅 They do a trio of sausages to die for 😮😮😮

Ha ha ha good joke

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Did you get your fortune told in the old Gypsy caravan, I think she used to be on good morning Britain if I remember rightly, she used to take my fortune quite often, never help with winning the lottery though😢.

How many English accents did you hear from anyone taking money on that Pier? Zero.

So it wasn’t a car for ‘ewe’ then?

Hahahaha 😂😂😂😂

Sorry you had all that hassle Ian x

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?

I went into Tesco's today and asked the guy behind the bread counter and asked if he had any boules, I got chased out of the shop, I'm still trying to decide if he was annoyed or fancied me, what I go through to get my dad a loaf of bread, this actually happend this morning.😮😮😮😮.

Regards to the bolts, can you not just fit them the other way round? That way only the bolt head would be near the tyre rather than the threads.

Amazing i'm crying that's so good

Classic. :D

LMAO