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Yes, it is 100 percent a human and legal right to know one's identity. Agree completely. Appreciate you sharing that. I'm also incredibly sad to hear how cruel and inhumane the courts and public health systems controlling adoptee records were to you. This is how they show up for adoptees nearly always. It's cruel beyond reason.

Kamala is the problem. She used her law degree to traffic children or use the system to look the other way. Wake up she’s evil.

All of us were thrown to the wind, one way or another, many of us losing all of our cultural birthrights in the process. The greatest challenge, however, is in facing the fact that most adult adoptees, if born today, would just be an abortion statistic. We were dehumanised by the adoption process. This dehumanisation continues today by the politics of abortion.

I'm an adoptive parent and it helps to hear all perspectives.

You couldn't make this up!! Bless you

For me, the key word Ann Fessler mentioned is "abstract", how the children were abstract to the fathers. This word strikes a cord because bioparents were abstract to us, adoptees, growing up in closed adoption. This is why it takes through middle age or a lifetime to discover them and process that part of our identities.

Was raised with a very similar background. Can so relate! As a kid, would hide under the bed or sit in the closet with the door closed. Have said a hundred times that my goal in life is to be invisible. Love being able to relate to this one.

This was an incredibly powerful and educational conversation and I love that it was adoptees having it about birth mothers and fathers. Sharing this with hopes of educating my family and friends on some of the realities of placing a child for adoption!

I don’t know how to start being in the community 😢 but I desperately need to since I am now out of the fog. I’m a baby scope era adoptee😬. I’m very passive and withdrawn in a lot of ways and have burned many bridges through out my life so pretty lonely even though I’m married. He doesn’t or want to understand any of this. He has his own stuff. So how do I start? You guys are so awesome and I so appreciate everything you have done for so many people!!

What social media platform, please? I also felt no connection to bio mom when we met.

Great interview! Would love to have Ann come back with Linda Ronstadt😅. I agree with Ann that sometimes adoption is necessary, like for children who are in foster care whose parents/family can't raise them. I'm all for Kinship adoption, but only if the relatives really want and will wholeheartedly love the child. Babies shouldn't be sold and birth parents should be given support if it's only a matter of finances and emotional support.

Ah yes, the adoptive parents who don't disclose until you've found your birth parents on your own. That's a betrayal you never really come back from.

Adoption is a multi BILLION dollar business per YEAR!!! That is why the truth of how traumatic it really is is suppressed.

So. The catholic church is even abusive in these cases

Please use the correct words. First Nations

You can get a copy of the unredacted adoption decree now. That's how I found my bio mom.

Is it possible the bio dad didn't give the correct info about bio mom?

Also Midwestern. Northern Illinois

I was 17, a senior in high school. Graduated pregnant and married already. 1964

Thank goodness she got the names.Stephen you are so funny!

I just have to comment on this episode….the name at the bottom of Christina’s screen says h. davidwood. My father-in-law’s name was David Wood. He has passed on now, but that name caught my eye. 😂

I loved hearing your story Danielle!!! I really would like to write my adoption story as well! I wish I had done this many years ago, but I wasn't ready.

I still do not have my hospital records and my naturopath here in WA State recently told me that hospitals have the option to destroy records after we reach the age of 18. He also mentioned that it is a regular thing for hospitals to also say the records were burned in a fire. Very odd.

I love when I see a notification regarding a new interview from TMOM.

I'm an adoptee (1947!) & gave a child up for adoption (1966). Whew! I'm still healing after 77 years in Life.

Mine was through a doc also.

Wow 🤯

🤗Thank you!

🥰 lost in a sea of DNA.

Glad to find you both on this podcast. I'm 77yo, and was adopted at an infant. My adoptive mom told me I as adopted at a very young age (5 or 6?) I really didn't understand, of course. I asked her about the "real" mom at that time. Mom started crying immediately. I knew then that I wasn't to talk about it. But always wondered. My mom wanted a daughter, and I was her. Adopted through a lawyer from our family doctor who was also the family doc of my birth mother. From there, my life has been a complicated emotionally and psychologically strenuous journey...started running away from home in my young teens. Always came back "home". Many stories. Pregnant by a high school boyfriend at 17. "Had" to get married. It was 1964. Child was born dead, a boy, named and buried. I'd been 7 months pregnant. About a year later I ran away from that marriage to NYC in the middle of the night while husband was on duty at Naval Air Station. Drove to Manhattan. Who knows why. I'd never been there. Time passes. Not too long. I'm pregnant again by a young man who I met in Greenwich Village. He was a latchkey kid back before latchkey kids were a thing. That girl child I gave up for adoption. Her childhood was tragic, though she is still alive but very wounded. Bah blah blah about my story. The book you talk about today, brings tears to my aging eyes just listening to you describe her story. So many similarities. I relate to just lying there and letting a man put his penis in me without emotion. When I think back, it seems unreal; that girl/woman was me. My birth mom gave 3 babies up for adoption. I was the second. The first was a boy that her family kept until bio mom got pregnant with me, at which time they decided to give him up, and away he went. Hard to understand. After my abandonment, bio mom had another baby girl who is biracial. This child lived in foster care until she was 5. Nobody wanted a mixed race kid back in the 1952. She talks abut it with trepidation, and is obviously wounded, as we all are. Thank you for this podcast. I'll pass it along. I have met both these half siblings. End for now. I do maintain some bitterness towards my bio mom, that none of the others want to talk about.

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This was an amazing episode! Ryan's hope was one of my favorite soap operas. I remember when they wrote the pregnancy into the story. So many weird coincidences with her heritage. I find a lot of coincidences in my story and lots of other adoptee's stories. It's almost like the universe knows where we are supposed to be. Great interview!!

So good to hear another LDA! Lots of complicated emotions ❤

This video was so hard to watch. I wish you would let her tell the story first and then ask questions. There’s a lot of interruptions.

Reading right now. But wondering where the date 1:19 rape victims stories are

This was so great thank you!

Great video! I'm going to read this book. I'm an adoptee, in my fifties, and met my birth parents when I was 20. I started a writing project recently that may become a book about my time with a major pop music superstar, and suddenly it led straight into this topic, as she and her siblings were all adopted and have all had a lot of trauma and major life events that probably stemmed from adoption. Further, my sister was also adopted; however, she came from an extremely traumatized childhood, was removed and separated from her family along with her four siblings, and has become an extremely troubled person to this day as a result of her childhood trauma.

All these Fires😂

SO appreciated our visit. You folks are doing great things.

She’s lovely.

So bummed out I was trying to hear the recording and every time I do it states "it is unavailable" can anyone give me any guidance as to why or if it was taken down for a certain reason?

Incredible story!

Such a strange story

Word salad!!

This was amazing. You all just identified with each other and your shared experiences of being adopted. You were on the same plain and speaking each others language. I feel honoured to have witnessed this. I'm not adopted but was basically abandoned by my dad when I was 5, when my parents divorced, and he moved to another country. He was 'illegitimate', and so was his mother. I was unmarried when I had my son at 18. I am drawn to adoption stories and the tv series, Long Lost Family. ❤

Sarah, you getting emotional just touched me. I watched this yesterday but came back to watch again today Louise sharing her birth mom's writing that touched you to the point of tears. The realness of your emotions because of the raw sadness and loss of her birth mom. As a birth mom, thank you both for that. The validation of my own heartbreak. Thank you.

She’s not well either. Sad

Loved your story

I remember the air flight of those kids and the crash it was devasting .I was 19 and lost friends there.

Can’t understand