วีดีโอ

A music friend showed me this song if I recall correctly years ago. I always find myself coming back to this every now and then. It still hits hard.

Can you have family or kids ?

I was having so much suicidal thoughts 10 years ago as a teenage, also suffered severe anxiety and mental disorder. I got diagnosed with bipolar, spent my whole life fighting bipolar. Not until my husband recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment changed my life for better. I can proudly say i'm totally clean for 6 years and still counting. Always look to nature for solution to tough problems, Shrooms are phenomenal.

It’s so difficult to do anything when I’m depressed, I can’t find pleasure in anything. When I’m hypomanic I’m either spending money I don’t have or I’m yelling at people I love for no reason and feel incredibly guilty for it

New song goes hard! Hope you're doing well. Been a fan for like a decade now. Keep making art <3

Underrated

Keep em comin 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

Hi where did u seek out your testing..I've been asking the place I go to.for a while now..please any info will.help

Congrats on your rejection! I'd ask for livestreams but I'm terrible about actually finding the time to tune in.

Dopeeeeee♡

This is the hype and inspiration I needed today. Lyrics 🤯 production 🚨🚨🚨

Bro it's actually insane. As you describe the whole cycle of - I'm gonna try a new hobby and do it like a maniac, meditation, boxing, cold shower, waking up everyday at the same time - I'm like "yeah, that's me". I'm getting extremely motivated and start with all those good things but afterwards I'm falling into a hole, and I'm just wondering whats happening because I was just THAT guy who's extremely productive, social, full of energy bla bla bla. But not all the time. But why? Am I just a looser seeking for an excuse? I got diagnosed with Bipolar 2 and I'm quite happy to see, that there are truly other people dealing with that stuff. Before that, no one really understood what I experienced over and over and over - this cycle of up and downs. But know I'm aware and try to realize the phase I'm in.

How are things going with the meds these days? I tried lithium but I didn't like the way it made me feel.

Hi! thanks for the video. I was diagnosed with bipolar 2 a few weeks ago, but I'm an unusual patient since I had many depressive episodes (some really bad, with suicide attempt and hospitalization) but I only had ONE hypomaniac episode which lasted for almost three years. So I was uncertain about my diagnosis. Anyway seeing this video really helps so thank you❤

Thanks for sharing your perspective on that weird situation. I personally miss the livestreams, but I enjoy all of the other video ideas.

Thanks for sharing your experiences! I tried leaving a more detailed comment earlier, but TH-cam removed it for some reason... Either way, I found a lot of what you described to be very relatable. Glad that you're continuing to share your art with the world despite rejection.

good

What I want is to see one of my fav composers to be successful :P On a separate note, as a fellow composer who's basically unknown, may I share one of my most recent visions with you? Not necessarily looking for feedback or anything, but I'm always excited to share my new music with others lol

Lithium is the best medication and there is no weird bias in giving it because it is an element and can't be patented.

I don't wanna wait another minute I'm beginning to get a venomous sentiment Administer the medicine My head has been spinning Been inventing like Thomas Edison I'm bitter, but I'll never be quitting cause I'm a veteran And I don't owe you a minute in my position I'm willing to take a second to spill And I'm second guessing the feeling And I'm repressing the skill in it I've been dressing to kill it Like I'm investing in villainy Are you feelin me? Bet you feel a bit better You better feel better A benefit's a benefit Better ever than never I never said I was clever I'd better get it together Cause everything that I said could be forgettable rhetoric God I hope not I don't got a whole lot Left to try, I testify I'm probably Next in line to wreck the mic You gotta be deaf to whine The best is mine, you follow me? [Chorus] And I'm not sure what I've been fighting for It seems like armageddon is upon us Walking with the weight of the world in the way in front of me I'm talking 'bout the fate of the world & the way it's gonna be You're frontin' like they made up the data cause in your fantasy There's something that negated the way that I play, but I'm Trying to keep my focus; I'm hoping for something different While coping with your decisions; I'm choking and no one listens I'm broken but I'm not missin' a moment or reminiscin' I'm totally set on fixin' the motives of politicians Stop Corporations invest in domestic policy While stepping on the press and oppressing us into poverty Depressing that the pressure is messing with our equality The stress is progressing while they decimate our economy We can settle the battle by getting rid of the rubble But you're just hitting the bottle, because you're living for trouble Why can't you get on the level and be a bit of a rebel? When it's a bit of a struggle you shut down. [Chorus] And I'm not sure what I've been fighting for It seems like armageddon is upon us Taking a break and I'm breakin em all Makin a bomb, takin' it all back Makin' it all smack, wakin' em all back up Thinkin' they're all that, bringin' em all back cause I'm bigger than all that rigamarole; that's just the Thing about all that, makin' em all jacked up I'm thinkin' of fallbacks, makin' a call back cause You're thinkin' I'm all whack, thinkin' I'm all smack talk Well let me tell you something It's a bit of a riddle, a little bit of a predicament A bit of a pickle to get rid of all the bitterness If you're cynical, sentimental, or mental: be invisible The minute is critical; the consequences are visceral Consider for a minute the implications Of being a different race When you live in a situation Where people in your nation Assume that it's your laziness Perfectly correlating with money and You're making it poorly The minute the system was invented they made a mockery Of men and of women we descended from, they forgot to read The minimal print up in the center that mentioned robbery Of men with a different color skin they considered property And I can sit & pretend that I did it properly But then again, the fact is I wasn't born into poverty A little big-headed, but the battle was never properly leveled I'm ahead but it was never because I ought to be [Chorus] And I'm not sure what I've been fighting for It seems like armageddon is upon us And I'm not sure what I've been fighting for It seems like armageddon is upon us

This goes hard

Holy fuck I need to see a psychiatrist. I’m fucking drowning

important song

Your diagnosis journey sounds like mine(the part about your therapist and psychiatrist working together). I finally opened up to my aunt about my suicidal ideation, and she referred me to a psychiatrist who diagnosed me with depression. I was given fluoxetine and started therapy,but 2 months down the line, I wasn't feeling better if anything I felt slightly worse but I was afraid of telling my psychiatrist because I thought she'd think I was drug seeking. I finally told my therapist about how I felt,and she helped me set an appointment to see my psychiatrist again(they worked in the same institution),after my meeting with my psch,she gave me an adhd test and asked if my therapist could be a consultant to which I agreed. Thats when she diagnosed me with Bipolar 2,whicg came as a shock to me because I had always self diagnosed myself as ADHD. But the more research i did and continue to do on Bipolar 2,the more i realise my psych was right and im so grateful that she caught it early because so many Bipolar women are misdiagnosed.

Cool❤

15:27 was me. After having the diagnosis for a yr and a half, I'm not in denial anymore that they were right. Accepting this has made my self-esteem and self awareness better because I understand why my life has been how it is.

Lyrics I don't wanna wait another minute I'm beginning to get a venomous sentiment Administer the medicine My head has been spinning Been inventing like Thomas Edison I'm bitter, but I'll never be quitting cause I'm a veteran And I don't owe you a minute in my position I'm willing to take a second to spill And I'm second guessing the feeling And I'm repressing the skill in it I've been dressing to kill it Like I'm investing in villainy Are you feelin' me? Bet you feel a bit better You better feel bеtter A benefit's a bеnefit Better ever than never I never said I was clever I'd better get it together Cause everything that I said could be forgettable rhetoric God I hope not I don't got a whole lot Left to try, I testify I'm probably Next in line to wreck the mic You gotta be deaf to whine The best is mine, you follow me? And I'm not sure what I've been fighting for It seems like armageddon is upon us Walking with the weight of the world in the way in front of me I'm talking 'bout the fate of the world and the way it's gonna be You're frontin' like they made up the data cause in your fantasy There's something that negated the way that I play, but I'm Tr-tr-trying to keep my focus; I'm hoping for something different While coping with your decisions; I'm choking and no one listens I'm broken but I'm not missin' a moment or reminiscin' I'm totally set on fixin' the motives of politicians Corporations invest in domestic policy While stepping on the press and oppressing us into poverty Depressing that the pressure is messing with our equality The stress is progressing while they decimate our economy (Oh?) We can settle the battle by getting rid of the rubble But you're just hitting the bottle because you're living for trouble Why can't you get on the level and be a bit of a rebel? When it's a bit of a struggle, you shut down And I'm not sure what I've been fighting for It seems like armageddon is upon us Taking a break and I'm breakin' 'em all Makin a bomb, takin' it all back Makin' it all smack, wakin' em all back up Thinkin' they're all that, bringin' em all back cause I'm bigger than all that rigamarole; that's just the Thing about all that, makin' em all jacked up I'm thinkin' of fallbacks, makin' a call back cause You're thinkin' I'm all whack, thinkin' I'm all smack talk Well let me tell you something It's a bit of a riddle, a little bit of a predicament A bit of a pickle to get rid of all the bitterness If you're cynical, sentimental, or mental: be invisible The minute is critical; the consequences are visceral Consider for a minute the implications Of being a different race When you live in a situation Where people in your nation Assume that it's your laziness Perfectly correlating with money and You're making it poorly

I also have bipolar 2, But what really made me relate is seeing you were Ableton gang. I produce music and have a similar set up, using Maschine instead of push

this is my fav song rn

Omg it's the most accurate description of bipolar 2. Currently slowly going down trying to keep up with responsibilities I took when I felt better. Yet I'm unmedicated and in Russia and also queer, it's like default that everything sucks here, either u r not on meds too or American healthcare sucks.

Sinister B did a cover of this song at 175% speed

This may not be medical advice, but it's golden advice. Awareness awareness awareness. Then, work on meds, therapy, and anything that helps you feel stable.

Can you work a full time job with bipolar?

this is what happens when you search up "its a bit of a riddle a little bit of a predicament a bit of a pickle to get rid of all the bitterness if you're cynical sentimental or mental be invisible the minute is critical the consequences are visceral"

Man, i feel like you're telling my exact story.. im seeing a psychiatrists next week but already feel im bipolar 2

We are the same - let’s be best friends 🖤

Literally started crying near the end hearing how someone like me can have people who love them and that I’m still deserving of love

You’re so underrated. I’ve been listening to you for years, and I’ve just been waiting on you to blow up.

🙌🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Praise Jesus 🙌💕🙏! Thank u sooo much! U r real, u r one of us, u get it! I am soooo grateful for all that u r sharing, bless u 🙏💕🕊! This really helped me, I needed it desperately 🙏💕🕊

How Evoke is so underrated? You deserve more bro 🗣️🗣️🔥🔥

Thank you for your honesty and being so open.

Seroquel?

Hi! Amazing videos. Do you have links for those tests please? I am also confused abour having bipolar or something else.

❤

Really like the vibes from this song. I definitely agree your work is unique and that's why I like it so much. Still working on confidence myself and this is giving me life.

damn..... that's too good for this world

When ur song got popularized because of a marathon map from osu!mania lmfao

While I appreciate your video saying you will delete "misinformation" is a mistake. I am 56 and the majority of "science" or "medical info" listed as fact has since been proven wrong. (example- through out the 70s' any doctor or "expert" said butter is horrid and use margarine. If back then we had the internet and I posted avoid margarine and use butter "experts" would say that is "misinformation" and push to ban that communication. I am for ALL information available and the antidote for false info is better case for good info.

I am watching after having strong suspicions about a male family regarding bipolar. So thank you for sharing your journey - it gives so much insight on mental health and your personal experience.