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Yes of course! You can book a consultation here: www.goodingwellness.com/margaret-lorenz-lp, or email me at: Margaret@goodingwellness.org

Glad to hear that!

Thanks for your comment! I can see how the concepts of limerence and toxic hope might seem similar to codependency at first glance, but they’re distinct experiences. Let me explain. Limerence is a mental and emotional state characterized by an intense, obsessive attraction to someone, often paired with an overwhelming desire for reciprocation. What makes limerence unique is that it doesn’t require a reciprocal relationship or even a close connection to the other person. The individual experiencing limerence becomes hyper-focused on their attraction and fantasizes about bringing the other person into their life, regardless of whether that person has shown interest-or even clearly signaled a lack of it. Toxic hope plays a key role in perpetuating limerence. It convinces the person that if they just wait, try harder, or hold on a little longer, the other person will eventually reciprocate their feelings. This hope keeps the cycle going, often causing significant emotional pain and preventing the person from moving on. Unlike a codependent relationship, where both parties are typically involved in a dynamic of mutual dependence, limerence can exist entirely in one person’s mind. It doesn’t need the other person to participate actively. And while limerence can occur with narcissists or dismissive avoidants-personalities that might amplify these feelings-it can also happen with completely ordinary, non-pathological people. There’s no need for love bombing, devaluing, discarding, or a narcissistic abuse cycle for limerence to take hold. Limerence and toxic hope aren’t necessarily tied to any pathology or personality disorder. For some people, this might happen once in their lifetime, while others may experience it more often. What makes it so challenging is the hyper-focus on the attraction itself, creating a deep emotional investment in someone who may never be a part of their life. I hope this clears up the difference and helps shed light on the unique dynamics of limerence and toxic hope. Thanks again for raising such an important point! Let me know if you’d like more clarification or examples. 😊

When kids are involved, you want to try to work together to heal the relationship. Getting into couples therapy, committing to building a better partnership is a good place to begin. Both partners need to commit to working together.

Thank you for sharing your perspective-it’s clear you’ve been through a lot, and I can see how strong your feelings are about this. When trust is eroded in a relationship, it’s natural to feel the need to look for answers, especially if your intuition is telling you something is wrong. That said, when a relationship reaches a point where there’s such deep suspicion, it can be helpful to pause and reflect. Instead of focusing on finding evidence, consider asking yourself: Is there a way to address this lack of trust directly? Would an open and honest conversation with your partner, or even seeking therapy together, help rebuild the trust or clarify the situation? If you feel your partner is gaslighting or hiding things and you cannot rebuild trust, it’s worth thinking about the future of the relationship. If you’re not married or don’t have children together, and you feel they’re not being honest, it’s important to ask yourself what’s keeping you in the relationship and if it aligns with your needs and values. Ultimately, no amount of evidence can replace the trust that forms the foundation of a healthy relationship. If that trust has been broken, the question becomes: What do you need to feel safe, respected, and valued moving forward?

It is okay to take a break and heal, to grieve what was lost. Please remember we all can heal, life is a group project. Reach out for support if you are in need.

it is rough, but it's better for you!

You're welcome!!!!