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Awesome advice. Thanks for sharing!!

I have twin fourteen year old girls with S/M, and I find this excellent advice.

Super interesting

"There is so much pressure to speak that it becomes reinforced avoidance and heightened anxiety. Mutism is a symptom. If you focus only on a symptom without understanding then you are basically only reinforcing what they can't do. 🔻Comfort precedes communication" Yes yes yes! So many bad videos about social anxiety where social anxiety is painted as sickness and pathology - makes people stuck in social anxiety panic. Finally - excellent quality content video on yt here. There has to be comfort in social situations. And that does not depend only on us. Communication is two way street. If the other party is abusive, ignorant, biased, judgmental, intrusive - it is normal to feel social anxiety when around such toxic people. When we end up with CBT explanation that social anxiety is irrational - we end up self blaming ourselves , hence making anxiety worse. Not adding any kind of judgement on our social anxiety symptoms is the key. Our toxic shame will make symptoms permanent like tsunami hitting the bay and reflecting back in a loop.

So useful and such amazing advice thankyou!!!

Awesome episode!

Loved this episode. This shining star features really puts into perspective what it’s like to have SM. And also gives people hope I’m sure to eventually overcome it.

Lady that is true, but with a man it’s very different. I have a wife of 30 years and I love her more than anything. Three grown children. I have worked countless hours sometimes getting little to no sleep, always giving to my wife and children putting myself last. That’s the life of a blue collar husband

Dr. Elisa, thank you for sharing your incredible expertise on Selective Mutism. With the right TH-cam SEO strategies, your channel can reach an even wider audience, not only increasing views but also raising global awareness about your center and helping more people. I specialize in customized SEO techniques that can boost engagement with your content and drive more visibility to your practice. I’d love to discuss how this could help grow your impact and business

How exactly did humans become socialized before modern schooling which has only been a thing for about 100 years? You’re basically saying if country bumpkins like me only have one child, they’ll never be good adults which is simply not true. He’s got tons of ways to interact with people. And honestly I’d rather him interact with more adults than children because, let’s face it, kids are awful to each other. You think they are really learning all this good stuff?? No. They are learning to degrade others, to lie, cheat and steal, to disrespect their elders, all of this being learned from other kids. And without a proper adult to tell them it’s not okay. Yeah no. My child will be homeschooled and raised to be a good person away from your indoctrination camps. You don’t need other children around your children in order to teach them confidence.

In High School

Loved this episode. So informative and helpful. When I have kids I will definitely refer back and listen to this :)

Welcome Dr. Jenna!

SM is what caused so many misdiagnoses and under diagnosis for 3 decades of my life. Barriers to access like HIPPA that first do harm by triggering anxiety do to not help, they harm. Character limits and counting space literally defined as being without character as a character don't help SM. Live chat has broken phones and computers from panic attacks. My SM is still not officially diagnosed due to SM. It's my understanding of a lifelong issue that forced me to become a neurodevelopmental disorder researcher on top of being a lifelong anthropologist Ethnobotanist pre-settlement lifeway's researcher and human migration researcher for life as my special interests. It sucks having it triggered by bright lights in a strange place with professionals that are ignorant of our needs and issues. Depression, anxiety, social anxiety and communication issues are all part of autism, especially when appearing functional and masking with intelligence to survive.

Love this one!

Super interesting!

A small group of friends is so important!

Nobody acknowledge adults with SM.. why is it ignored?

One of my favorite episodes to date! Lynn was SO GOOD!

Social anxiety is serious life-long term that is used easily without knowing the heaviness of the term. Similar to narcissism where people randomly label other person as narcissists just because they disagree in opinion. Social anxiety is more than shyness issue. Social anxiety is bullying, mobbing, exposure to ACE and ACoA, constant criticism. Like being stuck in toxic job with mobbing 24/7 from boss, colleagues, customers without ability to quit this toxic job due to lack of finances - that is social anxiety. Being tormented and harassed by psychopaths. Teen / school issues related to Going to parties and making friends and talking to random people - I would not label that with social anxiety. It is shyness. I am not sure that it is healthy to pathologize anything that moves as abnormality to make hysteria about, and then to use psychiatry as a weapon to control and manipulate others into neurotypical dreck.

*PromoSM* 😣

We need to stop treating this as a childhood disorder. My grandfather suffered from this until his death. Everybody knew him as being quiet, but to listen when he spoke because it was important. In a small town of literally 150 or so people depending on mining accidents that week, he was able to be successful and not entirely suffer from it. I on the other hand at 42 it has only gotten worse as I have been ignored my entire life literally yelling into the void for help, but also unable to verbalize even while (for most of my life at least) appearing out together and not absolutely falling apart inside. We don't get better, we are what we are. What happens if we get into situations where our disabilities are not disabling. Believe me, take away that ability to function in a low anxiety environment that is interesting to the person and SM is very disabling. I literally cannot do phone calls as it causes anxiety and forces the physical inability to verbalize. Chat based systems are not at all equal to discuss our issues either. Chat systems are literally trying to discuss neurological issues doing small talk in a bar with a lot of interruptions. Same with systems that have character limits or require multiple layers of security to login Email is an equal voice for us, yet society doesn't consider that as an equal voice. Just attempting to contact social security literally results in ongoing 508c violations resulting in ongoing first amendment violations. We need to stop focusing on children and speak to people that have lived with it for 3,4,5,6,7 or 8 decades and ask us in an accessible to each of us manner how we feel about selective mutism. We can help the kids if people would just speak with us. This isn't hard. We can typically type of write, even with motor control issues resulting from said anxiety. I am 42 and there are many days I feel and act like I am 80 and in a nursing home. I carry an alarm button for when I'm suffering a panic attack and literally cannot verbalize help. This is an anxiety related disorder. It doesn't care what anxiety be it social, general or actual real anxiety that is being experienced. The muscles literally shut down as part of motor control.

My 14 year old just got diagnosed with Autism and ADHD, myself as well. She has SM, has never spoken to an adult besides my husband I, but is verbal with a lot of peers. PDA profile explains so much, for both is us. I am so thankful to have found out and now it’s making so much sense that the SM community did not explain. The SM information never resonated with us, it being anxiety never seemed to fit.

I really want to go but I don’t have money😢 guess I’m just stuck like this

What the real reason you don't want parents involved.

Thank you for the story 🩷 I hope to see more soon !

Are you a legit organization?

Thanks for making this video on getting past the verbal intermediary stage. Is it normally easier with the second child than the first one? I’m impressed, I liked this video and you've got yourself a new subscriber!

Great, value and very important information Doctor Elisa, my daughter has been in the SM Camp-program twice, first time was in 2018, when she has 6 year old and we back last year 2023. she has 11 year old, she has tremendous progress, but she has some struggles base on her teen age with her self steam, in the school, friends, social media, chat groups, she doesn't know how she can manage some situations, and generate a lot of frustration and anxiety to her..(too many thing change and news for her and for us too), she think to take care herself and respond when someone says, or send/receive email, chats, something rude, bad or not right to her, those comment destroyed her feeling, she is very sweet, kind and respectfully young lady, we explain and talk about that topic with her too many times, and gives suggestion, but we request from you, like a Doctor or expert deal with this situations, some strategies, suggestions, action plan how we can create an action plan, to help our children, the kids some time are cruel, and in this point is ok to defend herself, please is something you can help to give more information about that topics, we really appreciate that and thank you so much.

Awesome episode! I can't wait to listen to more of these Shining Star features. Everyone's story is so unique.

Thank you for sharing ❤

Is it still available ?

this is insane ~🖖

Awesome episode!

🤘 Promo-SM

I feel like school is a huge part of this. I believe for me it started when I was 4 when I started school and the more I was bullied the worse it got. And there's so much expectation and judgment in school that you spend most your childhood at. I always wanted to be homeschooled growing up. The public schools are terrible.

Thank you for this important information!

ayo is that 1887 levi’s bootcut denim?

Fantastic!! I think you deserve lots more views! You should look into using smzeus . c o m!! I’ve been using it to help grow my Instagram, you could use it to promote your channel!

I really wish when I was little that people would stop saying I'm just shy all the time and that I got the help I needed to communicate with people. Now I'm a freshman in high school. I'm missing so many days, isolating myself from the world. Not only do I have selective mutism, but I have depression, panic disorder and generalized anxiety disorder. I'm getting help now but I think it's too late for me. It's extremely difficult to make eye contact, speak (of course), and it's hard to show emotion so I look emotionless and have a blank face. I look very stiff. The way I walk and move. People would make fun of me and still do now. Some people think I have autism. I made a best friend online and tried to talk to him but I couldn't muster up the courage to speak. I wish when I was younger I got the help I needed. I don't think it'll get any better for me. But for the rare few who do have it I hope they get the treatment they need right away.

hello dr. blum!

#StaySTRONG #WorkingOnDefeatingSelectiveMutism #YouAreNotAlone #MyProblemIsJustTheSame #WeWillDoThis !!! ^_^ Love and support to every single person struggling and defeating SM!!!! Yes, I love you!!!💞

Wow...so awesome. I wish I could find a Dr. like Dr. Elisa Shipon-Blum. My daughter is 14 & has SM. We've seen several therapists over the last 8 or 9 years...but only the very 1st one ever got her to talk to her. Unfortunately that therapist (who was an intern) took a different job after about 6 months with my daughter. Now she has not been able to go to school in almost 2 years & rarely even wants to leave the house.