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Er...I don't remember any waffling. Did you watch the video? That's probably the best way to understand what we discuss so intelligently. 😹

No, what I said is that a mental disorder DOES disrupt your life - that's not just gender dysphoria, that's anything DSM-5. For me, it took 52 years before I experienced enough disruption to take action. There are transgender people who don't feel enough disruption ever to take action. So no, I don't call gender dysphoria a "mental disorder" until you must take action - just the same as depression, anxiety, or alcohol dependence. Did that clear up my point? Regarding the point about sexual attraction to themselves, you're talking about autogynephilia. While I don't discount its existence, I've spoken to a minimum of 200 transgender people, and I've not heard one say AGP (or the equivalent for a transgender man) described their existence. I'm stunned that you've found the opposite. I don't need to pretend or make up lies when I know how I feel today. AGP has not and does not describe me, and there is no disservice by stating my experience as opposed to what you would like to project on me. Accepting my gender is the diametric opposite of transphobia. I suggest you watch more of my content to learn about the experience more.

I talked a bit about that, and it came up in the "Transgender Myths" video comments as well! It's a fascinating connection between gender and sexuality. I wrote a couple articles around how I feel both stem from what I've called our Sense of Beauty. This is our core knowledge of what we like as expressed in the norms of our social environment. Obviously, as our experience deepens, our understanding of how and why we appreciate what we do can change. Would be interested in talking in a video chat? It would be cool just to compare notes!! 💜

@@amethystaherrick Oh for sure. That sounds very interesting! I also made a video about this but it's in Spanish (not yet uploaded). However, once I get through a bunch of deadlines and overdue work, I would love to catch up by video chat. I've now subscribed!

Thank you! I'm feeling SO MUCH better! This past week, I hit four months post-surgery. I don't know if you've been able to plan out surgery, but wow...it did so much for me. I agree - as soon as we can surrender to the idea we're not meant to fulfill some social expectations, it's the first step on a path of feeling better. I'd love to hear more about your story if you'd like to tell it. 💜💜💜

Quick answer to your second question: no. AGP does not describe me, as I've mentioned in several videos. To answer your first question, it was VERY difficult to transition gender when I first looked into it, which was 2001 at 30 years old. It was even more difficult to transition when I would have wanted to, which was the early to mid-1980s as a teenager. None of us transitions because we want to. We all transition because we have to. When you see a later transitioner, it's only because we didn't know or didn't believe the resources were there until more recently. That said, I will admit I don't mind being in the company in which you've placed me.

Thank you for your thoughtful reply. I don’t know your circumstances too well though I certainly take your point about transition not being a choice but a treatment pathway. In the cases of Bowers and Levine I just am a bit baffled as to my understanding GD folk don’t like their penises, much less to enter into marriages with women and father multiple children. Maybe that’s some other kind of dysphoria? In the case of Dr Agapoff it’s equally baffling. An individual that surely has resource for hair transplant after working as a doctor for over a decade , but transitioned very quickly and chose instead to wear wigs? Wouldn’t that be rather dysphoria-inducing? These cases just seem somewhat antithetical to the notion of crescendoing GD and seem abrupt volte face. And in middle age they are kind of redolent of the male archetype of midlife crisis and getting a sports car.

@@grieffoundation8451 In regards to the wigs, yes they can be dysphoria-inducing, but hair transplants can only do so much. If you're totally bald, there's no real solution as there isn't enough hair left to cover the missing area. Not to mention the pain, cost, repeated visits to a clinic that can all wear you down. As for why there's so many people in middle age transitioning, there are many reasons. When you've been raised to believe that it's wrong to feel this way and have spent years trying to ignore it and hope it goes away, middle age tends to be the tipping point when many realise that these feelings will never go away and they look back on how many years of life they missed out on already. Not every transperson hates their genitals. Some are okay with them or try to focus on the fun things and ignore the bad. Personally I despise mine, but it's extremely hard to get rid of the things, so all you can do is try to ignore it until the ability to do something arrives. You can still want intimacy and a relationship even if your body doesn't feel right, so you tolerate the wrongness and try to enjoy the good stuff.

@grieffoundation8451 - I can't speak to any other transgender experience than mine, but I will answer your questions from my standpoint. While I did not like my penis, I still believed the social norms that said I should marry and have children. This is where I actually agree with Judith Butler's idea of gender as a performance. I performed a role, whether I liked it or not. It wasn't dysphoria that caused me to conform to social norms, it was the other way around - conforming to social norms induces gender dysphoria. Regarding wigs, I agree with @Here_is_Waldo - wigs can cause less gender dysphoria than being disappointed with your natural hair. To me, it's no different than putting on makeup for me. Just something that helps me look more feminine. It's interesting you bring up the midlife crisis. Early in my writing career, I wrote about how I felt gender dysphoria represented a mismatch between the person we know we are and what we present to the world. Upon further thought, I came to the conclusion it's the same force as a midlife crisis or any other anxiety of failing to fulfill social norms. I don't believe any of us transitioned because it was a midlife crisis, but that a midlife crisis has the same identity-shaking sensation as a lifetime of chronic gender dysphoria.

@Here_is_Waldo - thank you for this perspective! I agree on wigs and how you've characterized the midlife transition. I answered the OP as well - see my answer above. It is definitely difficult to get rid of your genitals...and if you'd ever like to talk, I represent the same hospital in Thailand where I got mine done. They did a phenomenal job for a very reasonable cost. You can contact me through my personal website (link in bio). 💜💜💜

Hey hey! I'm glad to see you!! 💜

It depends on whether you are looking at ideology of science. Science - transition is a treatment pathway for intractable gender dysphoria Ideology - anyone can be trans including people who don’t transitions at all, don’t have dysphoria and don’t desire to be the opposite gender.

@grieffoundation8451 - you've mischaracterized my work as well as most of the work around gender and transition. I suggest you read some of my articles or watch more of my videos. My articles can all be found on Gender Identity Today (link in bio).

@riverchampeimont - I think I want to make a video about this topic, but I'm going to answer a bit in text first. I do believe each of us feels gender dysphoria, and not just transgender people, but all humans. No gender theory supports the idea that only a certain sector feels gender dysphoria. Even if we agree sex is identical to gender (and I don't), physicality comes from genetics, which is individual, implying each of us has a different experience of our biology. If gender is purely a social construct (and I don't believe that, either), each of us - not being society, but only one member - would have a different experience of the construct. If each of us has a different experience of gender, each of us will sense different pressures from the social environment, and all of us are capable of feeling gender dysphoria. I believe those of us who transition feel *chronic* gender dysphoria, and we experience disruption of daily life that requires gender-affirming care. I believe current gender theory, biology, sociology, and politics are all disintegrated enough that no consistent understanding of sex or gender can be made from them. As a result, most people misuse scientific terms, believing they understand what they're saying. Gender theorists tend not to be scientists, and scientists tend not to think about society. That's why I believe my work is an important holistic view of gender that integrates all the aspects of being human. Again, though, I have a LOT of thought that I recorded today around this, and I think I'll try to knock out a video next week. Did that help...? 💜

@@amethystaherrick Yes thank you very much 💜 I'd be very curious to watch the video.

@@amethystaherrick I’m just giving my view, which is also factual as currently understood by science and medicine. Gender identity theory as used today is very wrong. Academic theories should seek to explain and describe. However gender identity has become an ideology that prescribes. A good example of this is mastectomy in non-binary women. There are hundreds if not thousands of women who have declared themselves’non-binary’ and subsequently removed their breasts to fit the ideal for this identity. Bit there are no women who have removed their breasts and then later discovered gender identity theory and declared themselves non-binary. Academic theory should be used to describe and explained not to create sub, cultural expectation for individuals to pursue surgical or medical courses of action

As a woman, I use women's spaces. If you're concerned about women, maybe investigate why that is as opposed to laying all your hate on minor sector of the population.

"Transgenderism" implies a uniform ideology, and that doesn't describe being transgender. That nitpick on terminology aside, I appreciate you supporting all humans living their best lives!! I get what you're saying about Paganicon...it will be two months after the new administration is inaugurated. I hope they are as bumbling as they seem to be and can't get anything together by March. I feel like I'm watching a Keystone Kops short when I see any of that administration talk!! 😹

@amethystaherrick I know what you mean, but somehow the clowns do sometimes manage to get their ridiculous intentions enacted in timely manner, so I hope this isn't the case for paganicon. I wasn't trying to imply an ideology, BTW. It was more a case of being a way, or ways of life which are inconsistent with what I grew up understanding, though in the 60s I lived in a block of flats where there was a person who dressed rather like a female version of Sherlock Holmes and was snubbed by other residents but woukd chat with my mom in the lift (elevator) because she refused to be like the rest. I didn't understand much about anything then because I was only about 5 or 6 years old, but the attitude of my mom to others stuck.

@obi-ron - I believe I understood how you used the word "transgenderism," and I thought a gentle correction would be better than a screaming rant. I wasn't offended by your use of the word; I was telling you it's inaccurate as kindly as I could. Did that explain my point better? I appreciate you adding clarity to how you implied it. 💜 I certainly hope Trump can't ban Paganicon - I've already emailed Kristoffer Hughes to tell him I'm going to be there! (Did you see my interview with him this past Friday, by the way?? It was amazing! Here is the link: purpl.pw/kristoffer )

@Hidinginyourcupboard - you'll need to tell me what "it" is that the idea might be "overvalued." Certainly I welcome other lines of thought, and I will reiterate each of us experiences gender differently. What works for me will not for you...and maybe not for the person who made another video.

Fun fact! I showed up on your home page because you've interacted with transgender content before. That's how the TH-cam algorithm works - you interact with content, TH-cam tracks it, and sends you more like it. If you want to stop seeing my content, the President of the US isn't going to save you. Your behavior will save you. So thank you - first of all - for the watch time and the comment. You've proven to TH-cam my video was worth watching and engaging with. Second, thank you for allowing me to school you in how machine learning works. Maybe now you'll be able to take matters into your own hands as opposed to projecting your anger on innocent people on the internet.

No. Why do you ask?

Apparently, you did not watch my video. I do address what DSM-5 says about gender dysphoria. I also speak from practical experience - my own, my friends and colleagues, and the people whom I coach through gender transition. If you don't have the same level of knowledge about what you speak, I recommend you don't make sweeping generalizations about it. Because yes, chronic gender dysphoria is not a healthy mental state. That's why gender-affirming care is vital. Presumably, you wouldn't begrudge a suicidal person their antidepressants and an anxious person their antianxiolytics. So don't judge what may or may not be lifesaving through the lens of your life.

@@amethystaherrick People with depression and anxiety have accepted medical disorders. Stop pretending that being transgender is "normal and healthy." It's not.

You may have missed the part that gender dysphoria is actually in DSM-5. I'm not sure who hasn't accepted it as a possible source of discomfort sufficient to disrupt daily life...other than conservative rhetoric not based in science. Could you explain your point further?

YES! All our lives, I agree. Thank you for your feedback - I'd love to hear more about what content you think would be useful for our community. I'm planning to talk about the steps of transition and how they get executed. Can you tell me more about the Trans Justice work you do? 💜💜💜

@@amethystaherrick The symposium was for our community here and had two speakers in the morning: one a faafafine/Pasifika woman, another a Maori woman who had migrated here; both spoke about their experiences in the 1990s, including the crises over housing, health services, finding work (which is still a reality), connections... and a non-binary trans man who spoke of their own experiences, including working within D&A Services as a counsellor... Later Jackie ran workshops on how we envision and do social change and making persuasive conversations in the context of the surging anti-trans agenda. Then we closed with a meditation session. My own work has largely centred on trans people and immigration, including asylum in the United States, also internal migration and violence in Mexico... one foot in academia, the other in community and also poetry/arts. More content? Let me think, but you are doing a fine job. I would personally lift up voices of trans women, men and non-binary people who are of migrant experience, who are Native, and racialised folk, Blak, and are at a lot of intersections. Storying is often a good methodology around bringing our lives, experiences and desires into the world and nothing like "first-person authority" as Talia Bettcher says.

@vekkstar - I hear what you're saying about raising up other voices. That was originally my intent in 2024 - to tell as many stories as I can. That said, I figured I needed to get myself well enough known as an expert first. So that's what I'm working on. It's taking a bit more time than I hoped or expected, so...2025 is when I'll be jumping back in what I planned out close to 8 months ago! Thank you so much for the compliment. I appreciate hearing I'm doing a fine job. That means a ton coming from the professional community such as yourself! 💜💜💜

@@amethystaherrick You've gone through loads! I appreciate the way you've documented a lot, too. But you're here, we're here, and we are alive and moving on, in spite of challenges (and tenebrous political horizons).

I hope this made you smile AND think! 💜💜💜

Paganicon is in Plymouth, MN. The link is: tcpaganpride.org/paganicon-landing-page/ I haven't been to Paganicon, but I hear amazing things about it. And actually - if you saw the interview with Kristoffer Hughes that came out yesterday - he was the one who told me Mhara was a Guest of Honor. He said he's chaperoning her to the event! I think it will be a blast - Pagan people are typically pretty accepting. I have never heard that word...but I wonder if the first three letters should be "coc" in order really to bring home its meaning. 😹😹😹

Right! I agree - there is a link between gender and sexuality through our sense of beauty in our social environment, but the two are absolutely not the same. There is also autogynephilia - wanting to have sex with yourself as a woman. I don't know if there is an analog for transgender men...but either way, it's ludicrous as the day is long. If you'd like to read the articles I've written about identity, gender, and sexuality, you can find them at Gender Identity Today (link in bio). You may have to search a bit, and if it's easier, I can link the three most salient. 💜💜💜

How could you possibly make a blanket statement that _no one_ transitions for that reason? There have been people that have had a shift in their sexuality after transition. One of my best friends transitioned for this reason. She is a very vocal HSTS, & described her dysphoria as "wanting to experience a hetero relationship from the other side" in that she didn't like the idea of being a man attracted to other men. Sure, this isn't _always_ the case, as people transition for a number of different reasons but to say it's _never_ the case is ridiculous & undermines the way some people experience dysphoria.

I actually talked about sexuality and if it shifts during or after transition in a live stream today. I do not imply *nobody* transitions for that reason, although I will say in my professional career, I have yet to hear that be the reason. There is no doubt *somebody* must agree with Blanchard's typology; I simply haven't had anybody discuss it with me. Interestingly, most people who say AGP describes them well are very militant about it and would rather debate me than tell me their story. They see no possible way to explain how I am who I am without it being universal. I, on the other hand, admit there must be people who helped Blanchard find his theory, but it certainly doesn't describe me, and presumably not @velvet._. either. But yes, gender dysphoria presents in many different ways, because gender develops according to an individual. Neither of us claimed the idea was ridiculous. I hope I've answered your concerns.

Ooh! Thank you for your story! I don't know enough trans men. But YES! It is difficult being who we are, and it is VITAL that we live our authentic selves - the world depends on it. 💜🏳️‍⚧️💜

Thank you so much, Sister! Are there any you'd add?? 💜💜💜

@@amethystaherrick The only thing I can think of, is something related to attraction. The myth is that a lot of people kind of assume that you were gay and that you transitioned for some reason due to that. The truth is that it is rare to have attraction change and for most it does not. And people don't transition simply based on who they are attracted too. A related myth is that most people don't realize that Trans people's attraction spans the same spectrum as any other classification of people. Trans people can be gay, can be lesbian, can be bi, etc. However, the labels are based on societies classification of people (we love to sort people into boxes) and sort of falls apart with trans people. Do you follow how someone identifies or by their organ inventory as your base for label application? I really don't think it's necessary to point out. All of the labels could have been used for me at some point in time over my life. And I feel that they would be wrong to some extent or not describe me perfectly. If you could come up with a good way to summarize all of that...go for it! Or if it's a bit too complicated...maybe best not to bring it up/add it. The items you raised are more clear.

@@christine_penn - I think this is a fascinating aspect of gender transition, and I know you and I had some conversation before. I believe you experienced a change in attraction, right? I'll see if I can put together a way to discuss this! Thank you again! 💜💜💜

@@amethystaherrick Yes, mine flip-flopped a bit based on what androgen was dominant at the time, or that's the theory since it sort of aligned. But that doesn't seem to happen in most trans people and I don't think any direct correlation has ever been found to date.

Maybe complicated with my particular type of DSD and issues handling androgens in general...who knows?

Frankly, I think that's enough to say! Thank you so much...that made my evening. 💜

I love this line of thought - and I think it's similar to how I've pitched it as well! The Tao - as our Way - seems similar to the core set of knowledge I believe we are born with - what I have called the Origin of Identity. When we act in accordance with our Origin, we are happier people who are better for the Universe. I am not a huge expert in Taoism, but I hope you'll tune in when I release a podcast in a couple weeks with a Taoism teacher. He was phenomenal!! Thank you again for all your compliments. I cannot appreciate you enough for your support - this is how we stay sane, right? 💜💜💜

We will make a special effort to be with you on your next live session and thank you for responding to our comment! 🙏

@@NomiVega - you're very welcome for the reply! I try to respond as much as possible - how can I help if I only drop words and then run away?? 💜

Honestly, Sister? It's people like you who make my life easier and better. Thank you for being there to support me with everything you do. It means so much in my life. 💜💜💜

@ 🩷

Thank you so much! I try hard not to be a square...unless it's a square peg, and I think I fit that very well. Love you back!! 💜💜💜

Thank you so much, my friend! I'm glad my tongue-in-cheek video didn't offend! 💜💜💜 I appreciate you and thank you for having me on.

Right. And yet a comment below says the church does nothing to harm children... Interesting to see. 💜💜💜

I find it odd that nowhere in the Bible or 10 Commandments is pedophilia condemned. Rape isn't condemned either. The righteous Biblical figure Lot gave his daughters to a sodomite mob to rape. What's up with that?

@lotstodo - actually, there is a documentary called "1946" that claims "homosexual" was switched out for "child molestation" only in the 20th century. I have not watched the documentary, but here is a link to it. www.1946themovie.com/ That said...if homosexuality were not condemned by the Bible, why would Ham be sent off to the land of Nod? Presumably for rape.

I sent a detailed response that apparently wasn't allowed. I'll simply mention the irony of a person claiming the church protects children. I happen to know many who weren't protected from the clergy - they still bear the scars.

@amethystaherrick yt has been censoring like crazy, so I understand your frustration and appreciate your response. The church has done so much harm and I don't excuse any of it in any way, which is why I don't belong to any church. But I also don't blame God for the atrocities of man. Sending all of my love to you, in the name of Jesus. 🫶

@amethystaherrick yt keeps deleting my response, so I understand your frustration and appreciate your response. But you have me mistaken... I make absolutely zero excuses for the church, especially not for the Catholic church, which is why I don't attend an actual church myself. It's been corrupted. But I also don't blame God for the atrocities of man.

Oh, but it does - the church proscribes abortion, gender-affirming care, contraception... And we could look at Christian Science sects that proscribe just about any medical care. This was not at all supposed to be my point, but others have brought up the church doesn't harm anybody. I'm responding as appropriate.

Wow... I admit, I spent about an hour getting that recording perfect from beginning to end! I kept flubbing the line with "gender-affirming care!". I hope that made you laugh. 💜💜💜

Absolutely... 👏 👏 👏 👏 👏

Thank you! I hope I don't offend the host who interviewed me, but...seemed funny! 💜💜💜

RIGHT?? Can you believe there are people who don't see joy in being transgender? Crazy I have to point it out. 💜

Oh! Thank you! I'm very excited about the prospects. 💜💜💜

Thank you! I need to get to New Zealand someday...if just to meet you! 💜💜💜

I wish I could tell you! It's fascinating to see how the election gives people the sense they can be even more hateful now. What's the point? Do they like being ugly? Is it fun? Are they that starved for entertainment?? But I promise...not all Americans are that big of...er...silly people. 💜💜💜

Thank you! I hope I sounded respectful as well...I don't want to get upset, although certainly at times, it gets a bit trying. I already asked a friend of mine to mod on TikTok. I can tell I need it with these trolls.... 💜🏳️‍⚧️💜

@@amethystaherrick Here I thought in typical self-conscious fashion just laughing at the trolls in your comments section may have been a tad bold of me. I find you so patient and educational. Taking the opportunity to teach with your accreditations is such a gift to all of us even if some trolls will never listen - others surely will! A great way to make something good out of something bad. (moderation may be needed on TikTok, I personally never used it) Thank you once again Amethysta, you are an inspiration to me.🙏💜🏳‍⚧

@@3nrika - I truly appreciate you, Sister. Thank you for being such wonderful support. Candidly, the patience I have comes from knowing for every - say - 10 trolls, there is one of you. And that makes it worth it. 💜

YES! Wait...are we talking about Sarah McBride or Proposition 1?? I read an article earlier that called out Trump won the popular vote for President...AND many propositions for equality passed. How could it be that everybody is hateful if they also voted for equality? The answer (said the article) is that people voted for Trump because of the economy, not because of his anti-transgender claptrap. 💜💜💜

Thank you so much! I'm going to do my best to support the community, and this is a good place to start. 💜

@amethystaherrick thank you for your service.

I don't know much about Sarah - do you know her personally? I saw another transgender creator dump on Sarah for some policies...and I'd rather celebrate that she was elected FIRST. We can talk about policies later. 💜

@@amethystaherrick I don't know her personally, but we have met and spoke a couple of times. I have a picture of us together on one of those occasions. It was all from before she became sort of famous, but I have been following her career ever since.

@@christine_penn - wow...that's pretty dang cool. If you ever catch up with Sarah again...think you could introduce me...? 💜

Hm...maybe? The newspapers are hailing Sarah McBride as "the first openly transgender member of Congress." But it's VERY possible the mainstream media got something wrong...VERY possible. 💜💜💜

@amethystaherrick I'll see if I can find it. Maybe she was an L in the LGBTQ+ kind of person. That would have made Mike need Mother, too. And by the way, what is the + at the end refer too, or rather, who? I know we have Paramount + but I'm sure it has nothing to do with anything.

Thank you - I appreciate your comment. I agree...some of the messages going out are not helpful or productive. I do understand how our community is being targeted, which certainly hurts like a bitch. That's worth acknowledging. And...like Kamala said, this is not a time to give up hope, but a time to fight. 💜🏳️‍⚧️💜 (That chasers comments kind of fell out of my head as I thinking about what to say - it was too comic to ignore the weird way my head works sometimes!)

Thank you! I'm very excited about doing the best I can for the transgender and gender nonconforming community! 💜💜💜

Thank you, Christine! I'm glad to see Kamala gave a similar message - that now is not the time to give up, but to stand up and be heard. I'm bummed...and we do what we can with what we have to work with. 💜💜💜