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What I notice is that extroverts exclusively only talk to other extroverts which makes introverts stand off even more.

Why do introverts themselves start and prolong small talk though?

Anyone who hates small talk who lives in a city knows the awkward elevator rides 😂 don’t even ask me what floor I need to get to I will press the button myself

In school I didn’t ask for help in kindergarten and so, when we’d do school work and I also didn’t speak anytime kids were asked too. Such as counting to 10 even though I could do it

Yes I don’t know why I was like that at all. I don’t even remember a trigger but later in life trauma made it worse. However before that stuff happened. I didn’t know why I didn’t speak I think I didn’t feel comfortable, I didn’t now what to say or what was expected or me and I’d feel nervous like I can’t explain it. I still feel that. For instance in certian situations with people or going to a strangers house for instance . It’s weird because I won’t touch anyone’s stuff without permission and like for me I have selective mutism but as far as interacting in environments my executive functioning of unfamiliar spaces is hard to. I learned low I isnt know why even today why I learn like I do and all I know is when I feel pressured or stressed or put in a situation I’m uncomfortable I shut down mentally, the first is being quiet and with drawing, after trauma in my life I started to self sabotage myself and definitely like a quiet bpd where I hated myself and blamed myself for everything . I felt like i was flawed. Like my functioning program was not made properly. When I feel overwhelmed or judged or criticized or uncomfortable then I just freeze. I cannot go past it. I feel like I can’t move, an example is if I go to anew job or someone house and most people just pitch in and start doing the work or cleaning the house but if I’ve never been in the house before I shut down and freeze and I literally don’t know what to do or say. I can’t even explain it. I don’t know why I learn slower. Anyways growing up if your quiet or slower learning what do people do they say “hurry up”, this usually pushes me into a freeze response. I’ve always been known for day dreaming and dissociating. A place where I’d escape out of stress or Bordem. I can now fake a conversation with strangers for a short time or even co workers but after that I’m silent. I often don’t open up until I know someone. Even in relationships it takes me much longer then normal to open up to soemone, I wouldn’t even touch my bf for almost half a year. He didn’t understand it I was that shy. Some people no matter how long I’ve known them I can’t open up to them especially if I can’t relate to them or feel like they’re critical or judgmental . I lost two job opportunities because I didn’t learn fast enough. People say I don’t take innative or not assertive enough yet I’ve never ever gotten better from advise. My assertiveness has never changed. Now my feeling of no control in my life sometimes has caused a lot of anger issues and I e gotten bad enough that when I feel in mistreated I’ll lash out but I struggle to express calmly why I’m upset because I won’t say anything until I’ve had enough. Now when people say be louder I say people have said jt my whole life and I’m 32 I don’t think I it’s gonna change now. Hey you’re so quiet we will get you to open up but it never happens and I never open up that much .yet some people I open up faster then others. I’ve kept my emotions and a lot of things away from my parents but trusted my aunts and grandma cuz they helps us during those bad times.

Yes I don’t know why I was like that at all. I don’t even remember a trigger but later in life trauma made it worse. However before that stuff happened. I didn’t know why I didn’t speak I think I didn’t feel comfortable, I didn’t now what to say or what was expected or me and I’d feel nervous like I can’t explain it. I still feel that. For instance in certian situations with people or going to a strangers house for instance . It’s weird because I won’t touch anyone’s stuff without permission and like for me I have selective mutism but as far as interacting in environments my executive functioning of unfamiliar spaces is hard to. I learned low I isnt know why even today why I learn like I do and all I know is when I feel pressured or stressed or put in a situation I’m uncomfortable I shut down mentally, the first is being quiet and with drawing, after trauma in my life I started to self sabotage myself and definitely like a quiet bpd where I hated myself and blamed myself for everything . I felt like i was flawed. Like my functioning program was not made properly. When I feel overwhelmed or judged or criticized or uncomfortable then I just freeze. I cannot go past it. I feel like I can’t move, an example is if I go to anew job or someone house and most people just pitch in and start doing the work or cleaning the house but if I’ve never been in the house before I shut down and freeze and I literally don’t know what to do or say. I can’t even explain it. I don’t know why I learn slower. Anyways growing up if your quiet or slower learning what do people do they say “hurry up”, this usually pushes me into a freeze response. I’ve always been known for day dreaming and dissociating. A place where I’d escape out of stress or Bordem. I can now fake a conversation with strangers for a short time or even co workers but after that I’m silent. I often don’t open up until I know someone. Even in relationships it takes me much longer then normal to open up to soemone, I wouldn’t even touch my bf for almost half a year. He didn’t understand it I was that shy. Some people no matter how long I’ve known them I can’t open up to them especially if I can’t relate to them or feel like they’re critical or judgmental . I lost two job opportunities because I didn’t learn fast enough. People say I don’t take innative or not assertive enough yet I’ve never ever gotten better from advise. My assertiveness has never changed. Now my feeling of no control in my life sometimes has caused a lot of anger issues and I e gotten bad enough that when I feel in mistreated I’ll lash out but I struggle to express calmly why I’m upset because I won’t say anything until I’ve had enough. Now when people say be louder I say people have said jt my whole life and I’m 32 I don’t think I it’s gonna change now. Hey you’re so quiet we will get you to open up but it never happens and I never open up that much .yet some people I open up faster then others. I’ve kept my emotions and a lot of things away from my parents but trusted my aunts and grandma cuz they helps us during those bad times.

I bet some people on here aren’t actually selective mutism but I really was . I was completely mute from preschool till 2nd grade in school but would talk normally at home around family

I hate my voice definitely but yeah I’ve had alot of things said to me and I definitely had lower self esteem. I’m sensitive what’s wrong with that. Quiet or learn differently but idk I also learn slower and idk why either but they never got me treated or diagnosed . I just feel like I imdont even know what’s wrong at this point . I feel like everyday it’s a challenge and like bpd it doesn’t just go away. It’s a challenge to reboots my confidence again every single dayb

I hate my voice definitely but yeah I’ve had alot of things said to me and I definitely had lower self esteem. I’m sensitive what’s wrong with that. Quiet or learn differently but idk I also learn slower and idk why either but they never got me treated or diagnosed . I just feel like I imdont even know what’s wrong at this point

I was shy and I didn’t talk at all to anyone from preschool till 3rd grade I was completely mute in the preschool till 1 first grade. I started talking lightly in 2nd grade and I was held back in 1st because I was behind in doing anything and I never talked . I never got diagnosed. I was told my whole life I was lazy, I was backwards, to shy, slow learner, autistic, dumb, not listening; too quiet, too sensitive, incompetent; etc. I struggled not only in social or certian learning situations but especially jobs. I now developed quiet bpd because of my learning, my quietness and then later Trauma in my childhood. I always felt like something was wrong with me. I usually bottle it up my feelings. Everyone says I’m so quiet speak up and I do terrible in places with a lot of criticism or micromanaging or judgment and I just shut down. I left a job . The job always said I was too quiet and kept putting more pressure on my perfmance not being like other people and I also learn slower so idk

Same for me almost

What I hate about getting a phone call is I feel trapped trapped because I have to face questions and I hate questions and I hate that I have to pretend everything's all right when it's not. And people don't want to hear that it's not okay and that's why I hate the phone!

Thank you for plenty of the quick tips to balance a busy life as a parent. Its super positive, healthy for this reflective persepective when as moms we're always engaging in the external. Thank you for speaking directly to us moms so we can focus on what matters and who matters in life in the present moment💖🌷

I’m kind of sensitive I guess. I just don’t see my opinion counts sometimes 😅

Thanks for sharing.

I think the best solution is to make children do social activities. Like theater class for children which is mostly not theater but games and stuff. That way you communicate or play with others and find out nothing happens. You start to feel safe and all that. I feel that is what could have helped me. Nowadays I feel an incredible difference between when I am with people that make me feel safe and loved and when there are people or situations that i guess "trigger my cptsd" (it's a self diagnose anyway). But I do know that I could have felt this way back then too. But I was left all alone all my childhood in home and in school. Can you believe teachers though I wanted to be alone? How can a child want to be alone fusjsjdjdijdjfjf. It's really harsh to accept that you jad your childhood, teens years and university years stolen from you and it would have been as easy to solve as making me feel safe and loved around other children making activities like that

Your channel is heaven sent! Thank you so much this is exactly what I'm looking for ❤️

No small talk, get to the point and stop wasting my time

I feel the cause of social anxiety are the incidences where you were ignored and let down by people around you, where you didn’t have someone to lean on for emotional support, where you started feeling it’s not worth it, what’s the need to say a thing when no one cares. Often people with social anxiety feel let down and isolate themselves feeling there’s something wrong with them and they don’t fit in, watching this video and the people who have liked and commented I feel at ease that all kind of people exist and have rights to exist no matter who they are , no one should be isolated just because they are different. People with social anxiety also have equal rights to exist, express themselves and deserve to grow.

I only talk to my friends tbh and it’s hard to make new ones idk how I even got my friends

It’s a fawning response for survival

Struggling with social anxiety, unable to preach the word. Family gets angry when I don’t attend family gatherings and now I have to face my finances family gatherings and bailing out. I’m so sad and depressed about this. Had suicidal thoughts because of it. I pray that I’m able to over come this.

I was having a really bad day today and I stumbled across this video. I was totally in that mind set of “I hate being an introvert” “I hate myself” “I wish I could not care so much” etc. This video made me feel a lot less alone and I started watching some of your other videos. It really helped me a lot. It made me realize I needed a self care day and it completely helped me reset. Thank you so much for your advice in these videos!

In public I'm very quiet, like literally; people don't hear me. I hate it. At home and with select friends I'm practically Jim Carrey.

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Social anxiety is not just a fear of speaking. That is glossophobia. This whole message seems incredibly dangerous - implying that people with social anxiety who haven’t changed just didn’t want to badly enough. It’s like telling someone with major depression that they just need to eat better, exercise, and go outside.

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I see other people being humorous and I feel like I need to be funny or people won't want to be around me

Where are you? I find all these chsnnels and they dont post anymore

My mom talks too much for me. We can never watch a movie around her because she’ll talk about some random thing for no reason. I really think she has adhd leading to dementia.

Teach me your ways I'm so awkward at work and I'm in sales. I get random social phobia at times and stay to stutter but at times I could be perfect with words.

1:00 People don’t know shit about psychology. Some « symptoms » aren’t exclusive to one situation. Social anxiety is the fear of being judged. Most people experience this and as they get comfortable in a social context their fear of being judged nearly disappear. People with social anxiety experience that fear at a high constant level even if they are in a social context since 2 years.

Hi Bridget, if your an introvert...how can you talk so much in this video and your other videos?

Praying for everyone out there who struggles with social anxiety <3

I love this idea of moving towards our vision of who we wish we can be rather than moving away from social fear. I think that is so inspiring. All the videos I have seen talk about overcoming this stressful situation or moving away from fear but I am pretty sure that all people with social anxiety have this desire to be socially accepted, engaging and loved. It is positive to move towards that vision of our engaging, talkative and friendly social self and the opportunities that it can create for us.

As a fellow introvert, small talk is not genuine, energy and time waster, I don't know what to talk about and don't really like to talk. If I know you or feel a connection and we have common interests I could talk all day about the topic. As an introvert I feel I've always been observant, I want honesty, put energy where it's needed. A friend I met many years ago is more introverted than I am, we met at a church activity in the summer and we both sat separately, eventually sat closer and her first words were "I like your calm energy, I like your vibes and you don't bother me" and from then on we were friends. We could get together and silence doesn't bother us, but we can enjoy each others company

It’s always the most beautiful people who think they aren’t beautiful. The most pure of heart are always the hardest on themselves.

I once was going to pretend i had covid to get out of going to a wedding party is how bad it gets for me ,i get to a party and focus on the clock and how quick i can get out of there,bored shitless but lately have discovered im an introvert at age 52 so now my life makes sense at last x

shyness is different from social anxiety.. you are shy just seems like it and not social anxious or that's consequence.. severe social anxiety is something deeper then being overcome mentally

Im struggling really bad :/ first month in school and I thought it would go away but it hasn’t, only got worse. I almost dropped out because of fear of presentations

SO happy to hear you share your story. Forgiveness is so important, for yourself & for others. So are intention and desire. I used to have severe anxiety before going to school as a kid and would throw up, and was basically made fun of for it lol for me, yoga, reading and being mindful of all living creatures gave me oodles of peace. Hope to see you blossom even more :))

Social phobia is easier for women but for men its hell

"It feels boring, pointless and useless..." That's what she said.

You describe parts of myself that I recognize but have never consciously identified. I fit almost everything you've described :)

Thank you! More please

That's a relatable video for me. Thanks for sharing. I had one year of selective mutism when I was 4 and had social anxiety after that. I only learned what it was quite recenlty (at nearly 35 !) and I think it's really important to understand what is shyness, what is introversion and what is anxiety. At least it helped me a lot to understand what was part of my personnality and what I needed to fix to become happier. I'm doing a lot better since 3 or 4 years. I challenge myself a lot nowdays and as you said, it helps.

I am autistic and in my childhood I dealt with alexithymia , selective mutism, anxiety attacks, and awkward! so , I have a list of childhood trauma and was being bullied , one of them is, when I was in 1st standard I had a very rude and angry teacher and I feared asking her abt going to washroom and I used to hold the pressure until the point when its so painful and out of control , the whole time I used to prepare a script on how would i ask her! and when it got uncontrollable and I dared to asked her she refused me to go each time also the washroom was far far away, and I started crying but she didn't let me go, so I peed on my seat and all the kids ran away, and the principle scolded her in front of whole class for her behaviour and for the first time i felt that someone is there for me and gets me , so I did it for 3 days straight everytime when she refused me to go ..on purpose cuz it was easier than to beg her to let me go that far ... Also I never knew I should pee until its too late ..