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Awesome podcast very insightful

Enmeshment examples so helpful! Thank you.

If you are married to a MEM, it is possible for them to emancipate themselves and be yours. However, it is extremely difficult and involves a ton of therapy for both of you. I was able to do this and it saved my marriage and my life!

Do you know of a group therapy in SA?

Great video! How do I get the 3 circle plan?

Im so glad this podcast was about an open discussion, about an exciting marriage should i stay. Because i thought it was about Actually getting married to someone after they have had a sex addiction. Because,i first thought i will never be able to i believe i am healing from sex all together, i cannot get excited about women or even find pornography full of stupidity. And was considering Marriage to have a family. Im so confused about sex and Humanity all together. I'm struggling to know where to look for forfulling life. I know im not the normal type be saying this, but really over the whole procreation thing i think.

This is so true. We are 15mo post DD and are both attendees of the workshops. Recently my husband began crying as I told him sometimes it still really REALLY hurts, even though I know I’ve forgiven and made peace. I know his tears were genuine that he hurt me so much. It was important for me to see that. I trust that he understands what his actions have sentenced me to. Thank you for your podcasts. They are always so helpful.

When I first found out my sister had just passed away (unexpected) and my father (who lived with us) was deteriorating. It got real bad i had to focus on my father's needs. As my husband would tell me I wasn't good enough I wasn't what he wanted or needed. He had 5 affairs going on but 2 he claimed he loved. I do not believe he will ever understand the pain he put me through as my father passed. I now have no siblings or parents left. That pain is complete that pain is forever. Yet my husband continued gaslighting denying blame shifting and used my emotions against me. If you'd do this or do that (all sexual) I'd love you again. I felt so disrespected I can't believe he'd have gone to that demonic level. I found women walking similar paths (Praise God) or I truly would have joined my family.

❤

23:36 it is the hardest thing to do.

It’s wonderful to know a solution to help us get started on success! Thank you! Love is the answer!

Great podcast

Great discussion today. How often do you recommend couples do fanos? Daily, weekly?

Coming back to listen this was my ex and his family

Thank you so much for these shows!

Thank you so much for this podcast bless you folks! So helpful!

STAND UP FOR YOUR SPOUSE PERIOD! 🙌🏾💪🏽💯keep your parents outta your stuff ! Be tough

Yeah I would be gone. He can feel resentful in his recovery journey but it won’t happen on mine. How many times have we seen true crime murders of spouses who catch a cheater anyway? It’s not a benign reaction.

Thanks for what y’all are doing for us.

Just sub bc of my counselor here in Lafayette Louisiana

Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction" by Mark Laaser** - This book provides a Christian perspective on healing from sexual addiction.

I separated from my husband of 24yrs bc of the porn, adultery, drugs, rage and lies. I did all I could do when the truth came out 9yrs ago. I forgave, prayed so much, offered to stand by him through it all but he only talked about getting help, he never did. This almost destroyed me emotionally, spiritually, and physically. A separation was In order so I could get myself together and heal hoping he would do the same. Nope, he moved right across the street with another man's wife he'd already been having an affair with behind my back for over a year. That was 18 months ago. He blames me for everything and has everyone convinced i am crazy and totally cut me off like I never existed. I was devastated to the point of total despair. Watching him with this woman right in my face in front of our whole community. I thought being totally away from him for a time would help so much never knowing he would commit adultery in my face everyday. God help us.

Fantasies about most life things aren't wrong or betraying though, a sexual fantasy dreaming and thinking about having sex with someone else is adulterous and wrong. Thinking about being a star in a sport is not adulterous or sinful.

Is there a video on an enmeshment with a mother daughter scenarios. Trying to figure out if this is what im looking at. My mother has controlled me my whole life and when my dad died when i was younger it went out of control, over and over she'd say she didn't want to be alone, yet she has relegated me to that fate because she never bothered to find herself a new man to be with. I've tried to leave multiple times and am in my 40's now and still stuck by the guilt trips and manipulation even family members getting involved to keep me with her to care for her, they don't want to do it. I just i dont know if this is what im dealing with. I just know when my mother was in hospital for 7 days recently and I had a break from her whirlwind of drama and you gotta do this or that at all hours. Well it was nice to sleep thru the night and wake up without being yelled at and startled awake to fix her problems day and night. I felt my head clearing out where i wasn't so confused or on edge walking on eggshells, i feel it slipping away again and I want that peace back i temporarily had. But those family members who pointed out the difference when she was gone they fell back in line and i feel like a prisoner again. Just exhausted and awaiting her next order. She never let me date, she never let me have friends. She'd loose her mind to know when she was in the hospital i went to a dance hall, I'd never been before and really didn't do anything as i felt a bit awkward new to this and all. But i had fun, i don't think anyone would say i was dancing as im not sure what that was but a ignorant try not bad for first go. But i saw it on a tv commercial and i went and actually had a little fun when I got past the nervousness. I don't know just trying to figure out what this is other than just telling myself that its not right. Sorry if i rambled a bit much, my mother hates that too. But i wanted to be clear so if it sounds like it maybe I can find out.

I find this idea of "collectivist" Asian cultures to be weird and incorrect. There is not one 'Asian" culture to start with. And the Chinese do not sacrifice or even really orientate themselves to the "collective'. They look after themselves and immediate family in a very localised, self-centred way. And CONFORM to the wider culture to keep from being sacrificed to the collective. Which happens - and better its not me and my family.

It would’ve been nice to have two women who stayed in to women who left their marriages.

I lose and forget everything. Until I open the editor and dig in to code, the way I worked evolved so much over the years and I’m now able to keep things in mind with kind of a lose rope to then connect when I need to

Explain ADHD to folks at home

The money isn’t there for renting anything. Then what??

I love your work. Blessings!

3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 NKJV

This is very helpful thank you. It’s wise counsel for me as a wife.

Been sperated 5 yrs. I have no idea when I can approach my wife. I'm not scared just don't want to make things worse. And it's been 5 yrs of praying and fasting yet no idea

Fascinating

My dad died a little more than a year ago, and it was interesting to watch my manipulative, sick mother go to work weaponizing everyone she could-the pastor, cousins, aunts, uncles, etc.-to keep me in line and enmeshed in the system.

My husband is married to his sister and excludes me from everything they do. Would these books help me, or is it just for men who have issues with their mothers?

Lol yeah my husband will never divorce his mother therefore I'm divorcing him

Remember Dusty Morning!

I didn't leave when I should have left and thought we were working it out. And instead it turned out. He was just resenting the fact that I was keeping him from doing the things he wanted. Which would not have been faithful to me and eventually he left me and at that point. I'm not sure there's anything we can fix anymore. It had degraded too much.

Great discussion. I learn something new every time and thankyou all for this knowledge ❤

Mine is doing recovery not sure he gets the full impact these betrayals (love limerence sex porn addict)have caused me. He is now a workaholic saying he screwed that up by his chouces n behaviors so he's fixing that now. He never has a day off always available by phone when home. I see him changing but I'm still not a priority I've been last in line our whole marriage life together. I'm tired of trying I'm tired of being faithful and loyal to a man who's never shown up for me.

"Special status" gives that kid so much..finances, possessions, exhaulted position, and the demanded loyalty is met with swift and high level punishment and verbal abuse/even hitting. Sexual overtones in conversations, etc are god-awful gross, as are the physical touch that occurs that is 100% inappropriate. So sick.

Genesis 2:24- Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.

It sounds all good. HOWEVER, it’s been a 40 yr. Addiction & I am beyond weary of it. He will be attending your seminar next week. He appears motivated to change. Trusting God for a breakthrough.

My daughter 22 dated a guy for just under 2 years, they just broke up. He was so enmeshed with his mother who we believe was narcissistic. He was 24, had to say where he was going, how long he was going for, and who he was going out with when hed leave home (he lived with step dad and mom), she would call her son many many times while he was out, sonetimes shed call to say its kate and he needs to come home. She'd demand he drive them someplace and demand she would get the front seat of her sons car, if my daughter wanted to drive separate, she would throw a hissy fit on her son. She'd demand that they not sit together on a sofa, or show any affection in their home, kiss etc., She'd try to control what they watched, their privacy alobe, disrupting them constantly, even though they were alone not doing anything risqué. He was a nice guy, but wouldnt take any initiative to set any boundaries with his mom, She'd steamroll everything. My daughter also witness where she was verbally degrading, almost treating him like a dog, or demanding. Fortunately i never had to meet her, because i would have lost it.

🎉🎉🎉

Wonderful shares and powerful awareness. Thank you.

Does his porn addiction count for this addiction? Is it.the same?

Does his porn addiction count for this addiction? Is it.the same?

Why is this even on here